by Rae B. Lake
“Oh, Malvado, I did. Rather we helped each other.” A slight smile broke out on her face. “Neno was a pure soul. I can’t tell you how he got hooked up with Basilio and the Manos, but he didn’t give up, never. He fought and tried to dig himself out of the hole he made for himself. Yeah, his addiction took a lot out of him, but on the days he was clear, and those demons didn’t have him by the neck, I’ve never seen anyone so beautiful. When I was here on the island, he kept me from losing myself. He prayed with me, and he told me not to give up. He covered for me as much as he could. In a world full of bad, he was the one spot of good.” She wiped a tear from her cheek before she continued. “The crank was how he coped. It was how he appeased the monsters in his head. I tried to get him to stop, but there was nothing else to take the place of the drugs. When he finally did break through and get clean, that was when Basilio realized he was more of a problem than he could handle. Your brother was on the rise, and he was a threat because he was smart.”
“Lo sé,” Vado’s voice softer than I’d ever heard it.
“Even to the very end, he was true to himself. They didn’t break him. He went out, standing strong.”
The darkness in Vado’s glare is enough to scare even the biggest men but not Cariña. She just stares right back. After a few moments, she reaches up a hand to stroke the face of the devil himself. “He died loved.”
Vado sighs out a quick breath before he suddenly wraps her up in a hug. “Maldita sea.” He drops his head down to her shoulder as best as he can and just holds her.
“Like, what did I miss?” Joda asks as she bounces down the stairs, her hair in a high ponytail, and the sniper rifle strapped to her back.
I roll my eyes and pull Cariña back from Vado. “I think I’ll take my woman back now.”
“Huh, te lo dije.” Vado shrugs his shoulders, puts his gun away, and turns to go to the back of the compound. This problem is done, but there’s still a rat on our property. If his gang didn’t handle him, there’s no way we’re going to let Fernando leave this property alive.
“Para! Para! Aye Dios, Para!” Fernando screams in pain as two dogs on short leashes snap and gnaw at his already decimated legs.
The members of the Juracanos gangs who managed to get here to back up Fernando are now trying to kill him, slowly. The dogs are bloodthirsty. They bite down hard on him, and when one gets in the way of the other, they fight.
Fernando is going to die, I can tell by the color of his face. He is so pale that I’m surprised he’s still breathing as it is.
Pito is emerging as their new leader. He stands tall, and the rest flank him.
“Call the dogs off,” Pito orders.
The brothers of Royal Bastards all stand back. We’re here to see the action, but this isn’t our fight. They should be the ones to get rid of their trash.
Fernando is chained to a pipe, and his breathing is ragged. It’s not long before he will die. Even I can see that from here.
“Malvado,” Pito calls out. Vado takes a step forward through the crowd of Cano’s in our backyard. We all follow behind him. We are still outnumbered, but I have a strong feeling that it isn’t going to be something to worry about right now.
Vado stops right in front of Pito and waits.
“We have bad blood, and there is no getting rid of that.” Pito starts to speak, “But I think I can speak for the rest of the Cano’s. We don’t eat with rats.” He turns to Vado and pulls his gun. Lobo and the rest of the Bastards jump forward just in case, but Pito turns the gun around and hands it to Vado, “He wronged you and your family. It’s fair you help us right that wrong, verdad?”
“I think so… Bastardos…Que dices?”
A roar erupts around us, and we all pull our weapons. Cariña moves closer against me and glares at the man who helped destroy that part of her life. The fire in her eyes, I’m starting to fall in love with, burns bright as she waits for Fernando to meet his maker.
“You don’t know what you’re doing… I made-” Pito doesn’t even let him finish. Before the next breath, Fernando is being riddled with bullets, his body shaking and twitching with the impact of each one.
By the time we are finished, he is more bullets than flesh. Completely unidentifiable and undeniably dead.
Pito and a few of the other Cano’s turn and walk over to Vado.
“Pues, that’s it, then?” Pito asks.
“I guess so,” Vado replies, and he puts his hand out for Pito to shake. As he does, Vado continues, “This doesn’t mean you are free and clear, but I would say a truce, for now, will do.”
Pito holds Vado’s hand for a second before he shakes it, “For now.”
“Good, make sure you take your trash from our home. This and those on our front lawn,” Vado let’s go of Pito’s hand and makes his way back into the clubhouse.
“You heard him, get your dead out of here, and if you can do that right the fuck now, that would be great.” I step forward, my calling as SAA pushing me forward.
“Back the fuck up. We’re going as fast as we can. Don’t forget you’re still outnumbered.”
“What in the shit is that supposed to mean?” Digger asks from where he is standing.
“It means, honor the fucking truce. We’re getting on; give us the time and the space to do it, unless you want to explain to your president why you started another gunfight in your home because you wanted to be the big man on campus.” He smirks at me, waiting for me to react.
I know when to stand down, but I'm going to make sure to keep an eye on this one.
“Now what?” Cariña asks as she slips her arm around my waist. I stare Pito down for a final second before I turn with my woman and walk back toward the clubhouse.
“Now, we rebuild,” I say as we walk in together, the nightmare that was Fernando and his Cano’s finally at an end, for now.
Just three days after more than half of all the Cano’s were at our front steps, the Royal Bastards have emerged intact and flourishing. After the death of their leader, most of the Cano’s have broken up into smaller gangs, everyone wanting to be a leader, but not many of them with leadership qualities.
A few of them even decided to try their hand and at becoming a Royal Bastard. Vado isn’t having it, though. To him, once a Cano, always a Cano.
For the first time in a long time, we have a reason to celebrate. Hell, it's Thursday, and that’s more than enough reason to celebrate for us.
The salsa music blares through the speakers, and I watch Vado and Cariña dancing. They move like they’ve been together for years instead of enemies only days earlier. I watch her move, and where to most men, the way she grinds and presses up against him would have gotten them angry, it only revs me up more. She turns around in his arms and shoots me a sultry look, biting her lip before shooting me one of her fuck me smiles.
Vado shakes his head and spins her around. Instead of catching his hand, as she would normally do, she stumbles and crashes into his chest. Vado looks down and catches her before she can fall any further.
I’m up from my stool and rushing over to her before she can even get a good footing.
“Muñeca!” I reach her, panicking more than I should be.
“Cariña, you good?” Vado asks as he holds her up.
“Hmm? Yeah. Yeah. I’m sorry, I’m tired and a little dizzy. I’m going to take a breather.” She smiles and puts her hand on both of our chests and starts to walk away.
I grab her arm before she can get too far. “Bullshit, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing, I’m just tired, ok? I’m going to take a little rest. Joda will come with me if she’s not working. You stay here, ok, Papi, have fun. Save some for me.” She smiles again and reaches up and presses a tight kiss to my lips. Nothing about it feels right, but I watch her walk over to Joda, and when they latch arms and disappear up the stairs in the direction of my room. I feel a little better.
“AZ, you want a drink?” Oro asks over the music.
“Yeah,
man, I think I need one.”
By 3 am, I’m ready to call it a night and go to sleep with my woman. When I went to check on her earlier, she and Joda were asleep in the bed. I watch as our guests and the club sluts try to impress the brothers and allies in attendance, and while I still love to watch them move, none of them excite me like Cariña.
“Let me guess. You’re thinking about your lady?” Lobo asks, taking another sip of his drink.
“Yes, I am.”
He laughs, “Would you look at this shit. You used to be the toughest of us all, but now you … eres un mamoa!” He thinks he is so funny.
I roll my eyes and push him off the stool. I couldn’t care less if he thinks I’m a punk. I have the baddest woman in the joint, and there’s nothing anyone can say to change my mood.
“Azriel!” My name echoes above the music and the commotion. My head whips in the direction of the sound. When I look up to the stairs, I see Joda standing at the top, hair crazy, face bright red, and eyes full of fear.
“Que?” I ask, but my body is already moving in her direction.
“¡Apúrate!" She waves her hands to me, beckoning me to move faster. I take off in a sprint. Something is wrong.
I hear footsteps behind me, but I don’t turn. I’m focused on getting upstairs. “What’s wrong?” she doesn’t say anything, just turns and runs back to my room
“Joda, what the fuck! What’s wrong?” I ask again, trying not to let my paranoia get the best of me.
“No se! No se! She won’t wake up.” Joda says, out of breath.
Panic sets in, and I push her out of the way as soon as she opens the door. “Muñeca, what’s wrong? Cariña?” I kneel on the bed gently and swipe down the side of her face. She moans and shivers, but she doesn't wake. She groans like she’s in pain, but no matter how many times I call her name, she doesn’t answer me.
“She’s feverish.” I turn and see Digger behind me along with Lobo and Vado.
I look back at her, and I can see that despite the fan being on full blast, she’s still glistening with sweat. I put my hand to her forehead, and it feels like I’m touching a furnace.
“Fuck, aye muñeca, hold on. Ok, baby. Hold on.” I pick her up and rush over to the en suite bathroom. I turn on the cold water and submerge her in it. She moans, but still, she doesn’t wake up.
“Cariña! Wake up! Stop fucking around. Wake up!” I shake her hard, but she doesn’t wake, just whimpers. Suddenly she stops moaning, she sucks in a breath, and her body goes completely rigid.
“What the fuck? What is this? Cariña? Baby. What the fuck?” I don’t know what she’s doing. I don’t know why she’s doing it. Is it a seizure? What is happening?
“Go get Millicent, fast.” Vado orders Digger. I hear him run out of the room, but I don’t take my eyes off Cariña. Finally, she starts breathing and moaning again.
Mil runs up the stairs, Digger close on her tail. “What the fuck do you want?”
“Mil!” I say desperately. Ever since the night she was with Mammoth, she has tried to avoid me. She’s jealous of how I am with Cariña. She wishes it were her. “Please?”
Millicent stares at me for a second before Cariña stops breathing again, and her body goes rigid in my arms. I look down, and I feel myself stop breathing right along with her until she starts breathing again.
“She’s cut,” Millicent says from the doorway before she rushes over to us. “Come from in there. The water isn’t going to help.”
“What? What do you mean she’s cut?”
“Cut. She has a cut somewhere.”
As if on cue, her body goes rigid again.
“You see that? Tetanus. She’s cut. We have to find it.” Millicent isn’t a doctor, but she is a trained ER nurse. She is the closest thing we had to a medic.
She starts stripping off Cariña’s clothes. The boys turn while Mil and I rip the clothing off my woman.
“Was she complaining about anything? Anything paining her?”
“No, there was…” A light bulb goes off in my head. I turn her on the side. She cut herself, getting me into Basilio’s old estate. She didn’t complain about it, but that was the only cut I know about. When I pull the shirt back, I can see the small cut. It is cherry red, and there’s a long black outline running along a vein. Even just touching it with my hand, I can feel it’s hotter than the rest of her body.
“Yes, that’s it. You see this discoloration here?” Mil runs a finger along the area, “Blood poisoning.”
“Ok, fix it,” I growl.
“AZ, I can’t fix it. She needs a hospital.” She turns to Vado, “She needs a hospital now.”
“Alright, you heard her. Let’s move.” Vado barks out his order.
I try to move, but I’m stuck. I have to depend on my brothers to make the moves for me. We pick her up and load her in one of the cars. There’s a good hospital here in Ponce, but it feels like the twenty-minute drive takes hours.
When we get there, the emergency room gets to work on her right away. Vado, Lobo, and Joda are here with me, but they don’t say anything. They just leave me alone with my thoughts.
I should have made her get checked out. I should have been looking after her better.
“Are you here with Cariña Velez?” A woman asks, walking over to us.
“Yes, how is she. Did you fix it?”
“No, it’s not that simple. She has a very bad infection, and it will take quite a few rounds of antibiotics to clear it. That is if we’ve caught it in time. It’s very touch and go, but there’s another complication.”
“What? Why would there be another complication? She’s sick, and you're a doctor, fix it.” I jump up out of my seat and get in her face. I want to put my fist through a wall. Lobo has to hold onto me to calm me down.
“Is there a husband? Significant other?”
“What does that have to do with anything?” I ask, getting more agitated.
“Well, is there?”
“Yeah, me. I’m the significant other. What’s the problem?” I ask, flexing my neck from side to side.
“Well, we could give her a stronger antibiotic, but it's not recommended for someone in her condition.”
“Oh my fucking god! Está embarazada!” Joda jumps up from her seat and grabs on to my arm.
Pregnant? What the fuck.
“Yes, she’s expecting.”
“How far?” I ask. My voice, cracking slightly with emotion.
“It’s very early, about four weeks. She probably doesn’t even know.” The doctor looks at the clipboard in her hand to verify this.
“Four weeks. Pregnant? Mine.” I can’t even believe the words coming out of my mouth, or the flood of emotions coming with them.
“Yes, sir, that’s the problem. We have antibiotics that would more aggressively combat the infection, but with her being so newly pregnant, it would almost certainly terminate the pregnancy.”
“Y'all can have more babies,” Vado says on one side of me.
“No,” Joda grabs my arm and forcefully turns me to her. “If you don’t do everything to protect that baby, she’ll never forgive you. Protect both of them.”
I stare into her eyes and know she’s right. That’s a part of her, and if I kill that baby, it’ll destroy her, and either way, I’ll lose her.” I nod and then turn back to the doctor.
“Do whatever you can to save both of them. If it gets down to the wire and it’s not possible, then switch to the stronger stuff.” I say, praying to God, I made the right choice.
The woman agrees and walks off to do what I ask.
I fall back down into my seat and hope I’ve made the right decision.
A baby.
Please let me have made the right choice.
I wake up in pain. A deep pain like I’ve never felt before. I open my eyes, and a light shining above me seems to pierce through my retina. I raise my hand to block the light, and another hand shoots up to grab mine.
“Muñeca, you’re ok. You
here with me?” Azriel is suddenly standing over me.
“Azriel? Where am I? What is this? Am I hungover?” This would be one for the record. I don’t think I’ve ever had a hangover this bad.
“No, you’re sick, babe. That cut you got the other day got badly infected. You scared the fuck out of me.”
“Ugh… my head hurts.”
“I know, babe. You’re still pretty sick.”
“I can tell, let them know I need the good stuff.” I laugh, but even that small movement is enough to have me wincing in pain.
“Muñeca, we can’t do that.”
I can see the hesitation on his face, why though I don’t know. “How come? It hurts, AZ, why can’t I have any pain medication?”
“Cariña, you are very sick. I don’t… Maybe I made the wrong decision. Mierda. I don’t fucking know.” He combs his hand through his hair, mussing it up.
“Azriel, what is going on.”
“Cariña, you’re pregnant. Very early, but they don’t think the medication they’re giving you is strong enough to beat back the infection. Your white blood cell count is still very high. This is the longest you’ve been awake since you’ve been here. I tried to hold off, but I think we should take the other medicine.”
I can hear him talking, but my brain stopped processing everything after Azriel said the phrase, you’re pregnant. “Oh, God, no, no. Please, no.” I feel my world crashing down. I can’t be pregnant, after all this time. Why am I being punished like this?
“Forgive me, Muñeca. I should’ve told them to give you stronger medicine, and not let this go on so long. I don’t know what I was thinking. I should have known we weren’t ready for that.” Azriel looks away.
“So far?” I don’t understand why he’d be so upset about me not wanting to keep Basilio’s spawn of Satan unless it wasn’t Basilio’s. “Wait, how far am I?”
“The doctor said about four weeks. So, early.”
I press my hands to my face, and I dry sob. I guess I’m so dehydrated I don’t even have tears left to cry.
