Steve was astonished when he made out what looked like a dildo. Why in the world would this guy want to use a dildo? Steve acknowledged that there could be several reasonable explanations. The man had recently had prostate surgery, so everything might not yet be in working order. Maybe he was dating an insatiably lusty woman. Perhaps it wasn’t his. The list could go on.
As Steve made his way closer to the table, however, the long list of possibilities grew very short. The odor emanating from the dildo wasn’t from some wild sexual experience but rather foul, such as after having a bowel movement.
Now Steve was disgusted. He had only one gay friend, but they never discussed sexual experiences. Steve was never really interested in learning, and his friend respected Steve’s straightness. Nevertheless, the first thing Steve thought after the stench hit him was that Thomas was gay.
Whether he was gay or needed help after prostate surgery, it was weird to see a dildo in a man’s bedside table. The agents dispersed after they’d had their chuckle. They put the device where they had found it in the bedside table and left making rude comments and jokes about Thomas. Steve didn’t really care so much, but as a physician, he felt sorry for this guy who had suffered a new onset diagnosis of prostate cancer and then surgery to remove a vital male sex organ.
After a few hours of roaming around the house and yard, Steve decided his time on the case was done. His mind was on his residency and getting back to work, learning how to be a surgeon. He knew that Erica wouldn’t be a part of that world anymore. They could chat about a potential relationship later, but then she would be assigned another task by the CIA that would lead her to some other place.
With a sigh, Steve set off to Erica, which proved much easier than finding the chip. He finally tracked her down in the commons, talking to other agents who were looking through some of Thomas’s belongings. Steve gently tapped her on the shoulder. “Hi there, stranger.”
“Oh, there you are!”
She seemed pleased to see him, but he knew it was time to go. “I think I will get on my way now. You and your colleagues have a lot to go through before you call it a day!
Maybe when things settle down for you we could get together?”
Erica responded with a smile. “That would be great! I promise to call when this settles down. Hopefully we find the chip so we can arrest Thomas.” She put down what she was holding to give Steve a huge hug and a gentle kiss. She whispered into his ear, “I promise to give you a call the moment this is done. I can’t wait to spend time getting to know you.” She hesitated and then added, “The real you. The Steve Carmichael that I started talking to months ago, the one that I really like a lot. Not to say I don’t like you now, but you know
what I mean!”
They both giggled and made promises to each other about when they would next get together. Erica assured Steve that the case would be solved in a few days and that she anticipated a little time off once the paperwork was complete. Steve listened patiently and then told her how much he was missing his surgery residency.
Promises were made, their intentions revealed, and they had nothing to hide anymore. They hugged once again before Steve made his way to the front. He glanced back over his shoulder at Erica to find her gaze lingering in his direction. She smiled, and so did he as their eyes met, nonverbally saying one last goodbye mixed with so many other thoughts and feelings.
Chapter 55
Steve knew the neighborhood and decided to take the bus back to his apartment. It would only be a fifteen-minute ride, and he was ready to get home. It was a cool autumn day with trees well past their color changes. The breeze felt nice, and dry leaves on the ground crackled as he walked on the sidewalk.
The people at the bus stop apathetically acknowledged his arrival. They had no clue what he had experienced over the past few weeks. Then again, he knew nothing about their lives and secrets either.
When the bus pulled up, Steve waited his turn to climb the short set of stairs and find a secluded seat with no one near. He wanted to collect his thoughts and plan the next few months. He wanted to focus on getting back to real civilization without having to chat with strangers about the weather or the news. He dropped his weary body at the back of the bus and then stared out the window.
His gaze became fixated on some point in the distance. It didn’t mean anything to him, but the center point of focus gave Steve’s brain a chance to rest and not concentrate on staying alive. He felt so much more comfortable knowing that he could go home and that no one would be out to find and kill him.
He was in a relaxed state of mind as the bus made its stops. Although mesmerized by nothing in particular, he felt as though he were in a vegetative state. His mind was numb, but he could not wait to get back to the life he was supposed to be living. Very amusing, he thought to himself as he remembered how frustrated he had been with all the hours of all he was putting in at the hospital. Now he could not wait to be that busy intern running around with barely any sleep.
The excitement became overbearing. Steve reached for his
cell and called the hospital to page Sally Jenson. She seemed like a logical place to start. Sally was likely to be in charge of the team following Jake’s death. Despite all the drama that took place over the last few weeks, Steve was more than ready to get back to his work, patients, demanding attendings, miserable hours, and mundane boring life of a surgery intern.
He was still in deep thought reflecting about his normal life when a familiar female voice answered on the other end. “Hello, this is Dr. Jenson. What can I do for you?”
“I have an emergency,” replied Steve. “I need a really good surgeon to help me out. You see, I have this big ugly toe that is killing me, and I think it should be removed. I mean, it is really big and infected and draining pus and smells and I just want the toe gone. Could you help me out, Dr. Jenson? I heard you were the best!”
“Carmichael, you are such a geek!” Sally laughed. “I didn’t miss your sick sense of humor, but I really missed you! I’m so glad to hear your pathetic voice!”
“Feeling’s mutual, you little bitch! When can I get started? I miss you all and really just need to get back there and work.”
Sally responded, “Steve, seriously don’t you think you need some time to yourself? When did you get back? You must be physically and emotionally exhausted. You really ought to take a few weeks off before we get you back to the grind of this hell hole.”
“I’m ready!” Steve insisted. “I want to get the show on the road. All I’ve been doing the last few weeks is thinking about things, contemplating life and the screwed up people who are out there. I know I am ready! But if you want to keep me off call for about a year or so, that would be great. No argument from me there.”
“It sounds like you have been thinking about it for a while, Steve. How about if we make a compromise: you take two days off and see a shrink to make sure that you are stable enough to deal with this shit here, and I will gladly take you back.”
Steve didn’t like the suggestion. “How about we agree on the two days and skip the shrink for now? If I lose it, then you can lock me up in a straitjacket for some serious counseling. I am telling you, Sally, I am ready right now! The two days is just for you.”
Silence filled the other end as Sally contemplated the decision. She was quick to act on a surgical trauma case; she could make split-second, lifesaving decisions in regard to surgical issues, but when it came to serious social issues, she could take forever to make a choice.
Steve realized her original argument was probably correct: any person who had been through this huge ordeal would need some downtime to mend. But he was ready. He had spent a great deal time reviewing and reliving the moments and the turmoil he had suffered. He had analyzed it all, and he was ready to be a regular human being again.
He understood the daily stress of an internship, but he knew he was ready to get back to work. He didn’t feel there was any concern for any post stress disorde
r after his experience. He knew that Sally was worried about him but also worried about the patients and the mistakes that he might make as a result of his recent adventure and stresses.
Steve ran out of patience. “Okay, Jenson. What is it going to be? I can’t take this anymore. The silence is killing me!”
“That’s just it, Steve,” responded Sally. “I don’t want
anything to happen to any of the patients because you all of a sudden lose it or freak out. I am going against my better judgment, but fine. Take a few days off, and I’ll put you back to work. But if there are any signs that you are about to lose it, no matter how small, I will personally take you in for a seventy-two-hour hold. Do you understand, Carmichael? No ifs, ands, or buts! Off we will go immediately to the psych department if you are starting to lose it.”
“Deal!” It took Steve but a split second to give Sally a reply. “I’ll get a couple of good nights of sleep and see you in two days, bright and early. Thanks again, Sally!”
Steve was delighted. He could focus on the bus ride with a great sense of relief. He was ready to be a doctor instead of a wanted man. The rest of the bus ride seemed short, and soon he was at his doorstep and walking into his apartment.
Pudge, who had been cared for by the neighbors during Steve’s absence, almost knocked Steve over as he entered. They played together for several minutes before Steve made his way to the couch and plopped himself down. Pudge jumped on the couch right beside his master, and Steve turned on the TV. He wasn’t listening or watching the show, but he was comforted by the ordinary feeling of just sitting in front of the screen.
The next two days passed quickly, and Steve was very lazy. He slept late each morning and worked out each afternoon. He tried to establish a routine but knew that once he began working again, his spare time for mundane things like sleeping late, working out, and being lazy would come to an immediate end.
That was okay with Steve. He had never planned on this interim break to play as an espionage agent in the first place, and he was ready to be a doctor again.
One habit that did return quickly was Steve’s constant
thoughts about Erica. The prospect of dating a woman like her, someone who would constantly be running around the country or world to resolve this or that issue, was exciting to Steve in a very weird way. He recognized the fact that she would be gone a great deal of the time, not to mention the danger she would most likely encounter on a routine basis. However, his schedule too would be continuously occupied by his residency, horrendous call schedule, and studying. The more he thought about it, the more comfortable he felt that this would be a perfect dating situation because they would both be so busy. He wouldn’t have to worry about her sitting around waiting for him, nor would he find himself waiting idly for her.
Even as quickly as those two days went, he desperately wanted to get back to the hospital and work. The refrigerator was filled again, and the place was cleaned up. The laundry was getting done, and his normal life was back in working order. He called several friends and family to reconnect and discuss the excitement of the last few weeks. Some people wanted to know the graphic details, but others were just happy to hear that he was okay and made it through the ordeal without any harm to himself.
He never once heard from Erica but knew that she was busy. He contemplated calling her while getting the last few things ready for his first day back at work.
He knew that she and her crew were on a significant deadline to locate the chip with all the vital information on it before Bill Thomas was set free. After seventy-two hours, if there wasn’t enough evidence to keep him incarcerated, they would have to release him. Once released, Agent Thomas would have no trouble finding a way out of the country and probably out of sight forever.
Steve genuinely missed Erica and just wanted to say hi
before he resumed his hellish schedule. He decided to give her a quick call before he went to bed. Books organized, groceries stored, laundry done, lab coats washed, and time to rest.
Just after 9:00pm, Steve was ready for sleep. He couldn’t come up with any more things to get done, and he was excited to head to the hospital in the morning. He crawled into bed, pulled the sheets and blanket up, and made himself comfy. Then he reached for the phone.
His intentions were halted by the phone ringing.
“Hello?” answered Steve.
“Are you excited to get back and be a workingman, you lazy son-of-a-bitch?” asked Erica. “I mean seriously, how much time do they give you off for annual vacation at that place? And really, you only started working there a few months ago. You sure do have a cushy job. Don’t think you could ever cut being a secret agent, Carmichael. Although that does have a nice sound to it, ‘Agent Carmichael.’”
They both laughed at the thought.
“Yeah, I start tomorrow! I am so ready to be a doctor again. So – did you get the chip?” Steve asked.
A silence on the other end seemed to last longer than necessary.
“Hello? Are you still there?” questioned Steve.
“Yeah, Steve. I’m here,” Erica responded sadly. “We searched Thomas’ stuff for the last two days – his apartment, his cars, bank deposit boxes, his office, everywhere, but we still can’t find it. He won’t say if he sold it to another private buyer, but if that information gets leaked out, we would have to pull so many agents from the field. We’d have to relocate some of our major military installations around the world, and that’s just the start. It has been very disappointing because we know he is guilty as hell, but if we can’t find that chip, he walks free tomorrow at noon!”
“Hey, I’m sorry, Erica. I know you and your team have been working nonstop on this issue. Something will show up.
You still have fifteen hours. Something is bound to show
up that will help you nail this guy!”
“Thanks, Steve. You are always so positive. I really appreciate that.”
Steve tried to change the subject to something a little more relaxed, “It was kind of funny that you called when you did because I was just picking up the phone to call you.”
“Great minds think alike, Agent Carmichael,” laughed Erica. “You should probably get some rest for your big comeback tomorrow. Let’s talk in twenty-four hours so you can tell me about your day as a hero and I can tell you if we let an international spy go free.”
“That sounds like a great plan, Erica. Don’t give up! It might be a long night ahead, but it’ll show up. Talk to you tomorrow. ’Night.”
Steve hung up the phone and lay in bed for a while with his eyes wide open, thinking about Bill Thomas, Sally Jensen, Erica Miller, and work. At last, he closed his eyes and fell asleep.
Chapter 56
The night was short for Steve Carmichael. He tossed and turned for hours, his mind spinning. So many ideas and thoughts were revolving inside his head. He thought of Erica and her pals trying so desperately to find this so important chip, and he thought about being an intern again and becoming a surgeon. Then he revisited Jake and life before all this started. The thoughts continued all through his precious sleep time and through his REM time as well.
The alarm clock went off at five o’clock, as it had before his espionage days. For a brief moment, he questioned why he was eager to start this hell of a lifestyle all over again, with the early mornings, late nights, and sleepless call days. But after a few quick seconds, he remembered how excited he was to get back to the hospital.
He pulled himself out of bed and into the shower. He wasted no time getting ready. He wanted to get his morning routine done quickly so he could get to the hospital before six. He needed time to get a cup of coffee and say his hellos before the grind would start.
As he walked through the halls of the hospital for the first time in what seemed to be years, he felt like a celebrity. He got high-fives from people he had never really talked to and hugs from old staff that he hadn’t seen for weeks. Nurses and other residents stopped him in his trac
ks to catch up as if they were long lost friends from childhood. Steve was amazed by the number of people he talked to as he made his way to the ICU to start rounds. The staff surgeons, who rarely give an intern the time of day, went out of their way to shake his hand and treat him like a real human being.
Steve knew this prestige would fade within a few hours as the grind started. Patients’ labs, x-rays and progress notes would soon bear more importance than a few weeks of espionage work. After all, this was a hospital and not a third world country with international spies and agents moving about.
“Carmichael!” screamed Sally, giving him another shot of reality, “How the hell are you doing? You don’t look any different.” She hugged him. “And you don’t smell any different. Actually, you smell like you have not taken call in weeks!” They both laughed, and she continued. “We will have to change that. Maybe we should have you take call every other night for a few months to break you back in and get that nice locker room smell to you!”
As they both laughed again, the rest of the team was beginning to gather.
Steve replied, “I wouldn’t have it any other way, Dr. Jensen! Hell, let’s just do a few days in a row since I am so rested and ready to go. You know, you snooze, you lose.”
“Don’t you worry about a thing, Steve. We have lots of time for you to get back into the groove of things around here. I don’t want to burn out a good intern. You know they are hard to find these days. I mean, they take unannounced vacations, leave for weeks, and then give bullshit excuses like that they are running from international criminals and spies! No, we better take our time with you. We really need your type to hang around, so we don’t want to hurt your sorry ass feelings by taking too much call!”
Steve smiled and tried to ignore her silly comments as rounds were starting. Sally reintroduced Dr. Carmichael to the team. Then, as if nothing had transpired over the last few weeks, they took off. Taking on the role of Jake as she had done since his death, Sally asked for labs and CT reports on the first patient, who was a trauma from the previous night. The medical students were still shaking in their boots beneath Sally’s tough and aggressive attitude, asking for this and that and why this wasn’t done and yelling at the resident from the night on call about why a blood gas was still pending at the time of morning rounds. “Don’t be bullshitting with me if you don’t know the labs! I don’t have time to mess around with your lies. Either you have what I need or you don’t!” screamed Dr. Jensen.
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