by Jane Charles
“Perhaps it was,” Elaina smiled. “The book I’ve been reading is rather engrossing and I cannot wait to return to it.”
Chapter 17
Nobody had seen Elaina since she returned from the folly. The only assurance Tristan had that she was even in the manor was because Cook reported her coming through the kitchen and going up the stairs. A few times Xavier had wanted to check on her but thankfully Garretson discouraged him from doing so. However, in the meantime, Xavier questioned Tristan on what the two of them had discussed. As it had been a private conversation between husband and wife, Tristan informed Xavier that he was not at liberty to repeat what was said and that some things were meant to remain between a husband and his wife.
“I understand as her husband you believe you know what is right for Elaina,” Xavier warned. “You are not a physician and you could do far more harm than good.”
“I’m perfectly aware,” Tristan had retorted. “However, you need to trust that I know what is best for my wife and that not all knowledge is detrimental, and not possessing certain information could do far more harm.”
Xavier slammed his glass down on the table, the whiskey sloshing over the sides. “What did you tell her?” he demanded. “Are you the reason she’s been hiding in her room. Have you sent her in a downward spiral?”
“I did no such thing,” Tristan assured him. “Despite what you believe, I have not harmed my wife, or upset her delicate sensibilities.”
“What did you tell her?” he bit out again, hands fisted at his side.
“Nothing that would induce a state of hysteria, the likes of which I believe you are about to experience.” Tristan settled into a chair. “Perhaps she isn’t the one we should be concerned about.”
“How dare you insult my intelligence or my emotions?”
“How dare you insult my ability to care for my wife?” Tristan sipped his brandy, enjoying the spicy aroma and burn down his throat as he stared at his brother-in-law. At one time, he and Xavier had gotten on well. Since Elaina’s return, the two of them couldn’t disagree more.
“Did you tell her about the children?”
This took Tristan aback. “No. Of course not. I’d not be so foolish.”
Xavier unclenched his fists. “See that you don’t. She can’t know of them until she sees them, do you understand?”
“Why?” Tristan had his own reasons for not mentioning Jonas or Eloise to this wife, because he did fear her reaction. His Elaina would be beyond distressed to realize that she’d forgotten them and he’d spare her that. At least until she had more fully recovered her memory.
“She doesn’t need to know,” he bit out and turned.
Tristan narrowed his eyes. “What aren’t you telling me?” He was holding something back. Elaina wasn’t the only one being kept in the dark.
“Children were mentioned shortly after she arrived,” Garretson offered, the far more reasonable of the two brothers.
“‘Children, I suppose most people want them.’ Elaina had said. ‘I’m also certain I do not, nor do I have any.’ Then she shrugged and dismissed the notion,” related Garretson.
“Did you ask her why?” Tristan asked.
“Yes,” Garretson answered. “She said, ‘A mother would know if she’d given birth, even without a memory, and if there is one thing that I am certain of, is that I have no children.’”
“So, you understand now why she’d can’t learn until she’s more fully healed,” Xavier said, his eyes boring into Tristan’s.
“Yes, of course.” He took a sip of the brandy, disturbed that Elaina was so convinced of something she couldn’t even recall. Why would she feel such?
The mind was complicated, that he knew, and Xavier had told him repeatedly.
“I fear that your emotions and care for my sister will not allow you to think rationally and speak of matters you should not.”
It was all Tristan could do not to call Xavier out. How dare he condescend to him as if he were a child?
“Perhaps you are the one who is too emotionally close to the situation,” he argued. Elaina was only his sister, after all, and he needed to be reminded who had the true control over the care of Elaina.
“I am a physician,” Xavier argued. “I am able to set aside my emotions, whereas you cannot.”
“You are also not the only doctor in England.” Xavier may be Elaina’s brother, but Tristan still held the power to make decisions as to her welfare. “I conferred with a Dr. Rogers in London,” Tristan informed the brothers. “He recommended that I speak with a Dr. O. W. Brook. I am going to write and ask him to visit and examine Elaina.”
Xavier stiffened, no doubt insulted. “I don’t believe that is necessary.”
“Perhaps not, but as Elaina’s husband, I value a second opinion. He is well known for his theories involving the brain and head.”
“I know of his reputation,” Xavier answered crisply. “Though I doubt Brook will respond to your request or visit.” He pinned Tristan with a penetrating stare. “Further, I will not have my sister treated as a…a…to be studied with fascination. She needs care and in time will recover what memories she can.”
Tristan wasn’t certain if Xavier simply didn’t want someone second guessing him, or overstepping, or if Xavier was jealous, or perhaps simply insulted that Tristan would like another opinion. It really didn’t matter. Elaina was Tristan’s wife. She came under his care the day they married.
“Please, can we not talk about if and when my memories might return tonight? Can we just have a pleasant evening?” Elaina asked from the entrance.
Tristan turned and sucked in a breath. Her golden hair was pulled up and away from her face, and the remainder of her curls had been artfully arranged, though one lone curl dropped and caressed her shoulder. Tonight she wore an emerald gown, a shade to match her eyes. Had she brought the dress from Alderney, because he’d not seen it before? “You look lovely Elaina.”
Her cheeks turned a darker pink. “Thank you, Tristan.”
“Would you care for some tea, or Madeira,” Garretson asked.
“I’d prefer brandy as you are having.”
Garretson pulled back in shock.
“Since when do you drink stronger spirits?” Xavier demanded.
Elaina shrugged. “I don’t know. It was something I enjoyed in Alderney but have no knowledge if I did so before.”
“You did.” Tristan smiled at her.
“Tristan…” Xavier warned.
At that, Elaina rolled her eyes and accepted the snifter from Garretson before she glided across the room and settled upon a settee.
“Something is different about you tonight,” Xavier noted. “What has changed? Or, did Tristan tell you more than he’s let on.”
“Xavier, you weren’t always such a bore. Is that what medical school turned you into?” she countered without answering the question.
“Nobody that I care about has been severely injured or ill before,” he retorted.
“I’m neither. I’ve simply lost my memory.” She shrugged and took a sip.
Tristan marveled at her. This was the Elaina that he knew so well and loved deeply. Confident, poised and not one to cower, not even in front of an overbearing brother.
“He’s worried that I’ve told you what I shouldn’t,” Tristan confessed, holding her eyes.
Mischief sparked, enjoying the secret they shared. Something was different about her this evening. As if a weight had been lifted.
“You can tell him you know.”
“He might have me quartered and my head put upon a pike.”
“Enough!” Xavier yelled. “I demand to know what it is the two of you are keeping a secret.”
“Husbands and wives are not allowed secrets?” Elaina countered.
“Not when the health of the wife is at issue.”
Elaina huffed and relaxed back in the chair. “If you must know, Tristan eased a fear I’d been carrying.”
“Fear, What kind
of fear?” Garretson asked.
“The kind that had me wondering if I was on a merchant ship because I was fleeing a cruel husband.”
“What?” Xavier asked as if it was the most ridicules consideration.
“Or that you were a spy, don’t forget the other option.” Tristan winked at her and Elaina laughed.
“Are you two quite finished?” Xavier demanded.
“No.” Elaina sat forward. “From the very beginning, I have feared that I was running away from a cruel husband.” She lifted her hand. “At one time there had been evidence of a ring. Then I’m reunited with Tristan, and having no memory of him, wondered if there was any truth to my fears.” She stood. “One simple explanation of why I as on a merchant ship could have relieved me of a great deal of anxiety,” she bit out. “I understand protecting me, Xavier, but consider how some information might actually be beneficial.”
It was all Tristan could do not to applaud her. Instead he smiled, then sipped from his brandy, enjoying the flummoxed expression on Xavier’s face.
“Yes…well…perhaps,” he finally muttered. “However, you left Tristan’s side hours ago and have been in your set of rooms. What have you been doing all of this time if not…”
“Having fits of hysteria?” Elaina asked with a raised eyebrow.
“We’ve been worried.”
They may have been worried but Tristan had not been. Well, not overly much.
“Reading,” she finally answered.
“Reading?” Xavier asked as if she said she’d been shoveling dung out of the stalls.
“Yes. Reading. I quite enjoy it you know, but by the looks on your faces, perhaps I didn’t before.”
“You did,” Tristan answered, even though he’d told her the same earlier.
“No, that isn’t it. I assumed you’d not be of a mind to read a novel.”
“Yes, well this trying to remember has been exhausting, so I decided to read instead.”
“What were you reading?”
It was almost as if Xavier didn’t trust Elaina.
“A novel by Mrs. Radcliffe, if you must know.” She tapped her fingernail against her chin. “Except, the name has quiet escaped me.”
Suspicion brewed in Tristan’s mind. Elaina’s memories may be elusive, but her tastes had not changed, of that he was certain. “You’ve never liked Radcliffe novels. You once stated that they were beyond the ridiculous.”
“Yes, well, I’d taken it from the library the other night, clearly not remembering that she was not a favorite.”
“If you didn’t like the book, why continue to read it?” Garretson asked.
Elaina blew out a sigh and offered him a kind smile. “Because I simply wished to be left alone and assumed that if I came back down to retrieve another book, I’d suffer an interrogation again.” She narrowed her gaze on Xavier. “Not so much you, Tristan. I enjoyed our time in the folly, but the not remembering you was becoming irritating and I wanted to escape into a different world for a short time. That is all.”
“We worry about you, Elaina,” Xavier repeated again.
“I got on well enough for over three years with this same condition without you doggedly watching me, and I will continue to get on as well.”
Xavier sputtered for a moment before he drew himself up. “Then I suppose it won’t be necessary to ask O. W. Brook to call on you.”
Elaina frowned. “Who is O. W. Brook? Should I know him?”
“He’s a specialist that I’ve been referred to by a physician in London,” Tristan explained.
Her blond eyebrows lifted as if in interest. “Do you believe he can help me?”
“I do not know. I only have a reference and learned of his reputation, but from what I understand, he’s most assuredly a learned gentleman.”
Xavier snorted. “He’s not even a physician,” he reminded Tristan. “Nor do I believe we need the assistance of the esteemed O. W. Brook.”
His brother-in-law was jealous, otherwise, wouldn’t Xavier want to do the best for his sister?
“You should write and ask him to come and call,” she insisted.
“I don’t think it’s necessary,” Xavier objected.
Elaina ignored him and continued looking at Tristan. “Do you think it is necessary?”
“I don’t believe any harm could come from him meeting you, and perhaps he might have a solution or insight we’ve not considered.”
“I agree.” Elaina gave a swift nod. “Please write to invite him to visit us.”
At her reaction, Xavier stomped across the room and poured more brandy into his glass.
Elaina really shouldn’t be delighted that Xavier was so put out by her wishing to see this Brook fellow. After all, he was another person who specialized in the mind, so why wouldn’t she want another opinion and just maybe Brook could help. But more importantly, hopefully Brook wouldn’t insist on her not being told anything. After all, reading her journals had proven that being given details of her past hadn’t harmed her. She’d not broken down in need of smelling salts and had quite enjoyed herself. Unfortunately, they hadn’t stirred any memories, but at least she’d come to know who she had been. And, as soon as dinner was concluded, she was going to return to her chambers so she could continue reading.
As with the night before, as dinner concluded, Elaina excused herself and Tristan followed. Though she should be polite and sit with him until her brothers joined them, Elaina really wished to return to her rooms.
“What were you really reading?” He asked quietly.
Elaina whipped around to face him. “Really reading?”
“You detest Radcliffe, though you may not have known so when you chose the book. However, I’d be willing to wager that you never made it past the first chapter before you wished to sling the book across the room.”
Her face heated. Did Tristan really know her so well? “As I said, I wished not to be bothered.”
“There is no circumstance in this world that would force you to read Radcliffe. You would have risked a return trip to the library, even if it meant a potential encounter with Xavier before you suffered through another chapter.”
Oh, he certainly did now her, but did she dare tell Tristan the truth? “Can I trust you?” she whispered.
Tristan frowned. “Of course.”
“You cannot tell my brothers, and most especially Xavier.”
“Elaina, what you share with me, will always remain between you and me.”
She stared up into his brown eyes. “Even if what I’m doing would be frowned upon, and not approved?”
“I cannot imagine what that would be, as you’ve been sequestered in your set of rooms all day and have not suffered in the least. In fact, you are more relaxed than you’ve been since your return.”
“I will tell you, but only if you promise not to tell anyone.” If he did tell, she’d never be able to trust him again.
“I promise.”
“No matter what?”
“As it can’t be very serious, I promise that even under the threat of death I will not reveal your secrets.”
“Well, I hope it doesn’t come to that,” she laughed. “I am being a bit too serious, am I not?”
“A spy would be proud.” Tristan winked at her.
Oh, why had she ever confessed the one scenario that she, Clive and Rebecca had laughed about? But at least Tristan was making light of the idea, teasing her, but not making fun of her, and for that Elaina was grateful.
“Your tea, Lord and Lady Hopkins.”
Elain grinned. “Could you please take it to my sitting room, off of my sleeping chamber?”
“Of course, Lady Hopkins.”
“Come along.” She grasped Tristan’s hand. “Let’s be sequestered together, where nobody will bother us, and I’ll share my secret.”
She’d taken his hand earlier in the day because it seemed natural to do so, as it did now. Except, this time she didn’t let go. She did trust Tristan with all of her bei
ng. There was no reason for it, other than her heart told her that she could.
“Where are the two of you off to?” Xavier asked just as they gained the foot of the stairs.
“To my sitting room to enjoy tea,” she answered.
“Do you think that is wise?” he asked with concern.
“He is her husband, wise or not, we have no say,” Lucian reminded him.
Elaina ignored them and hurried up the stairs, Tristan at her side, and she’d not felt this free in a very long time.
“Goodness, what was he so afraid of?” she said once they’d gained the sitting room.
The footman was placing the tea service on the small table and Elaina waited until he departed before she continued. “Was he afraid that if he wasn’t there to control the conversation that you might reveal secrets because what else would we do in private?”
Tristan simply stared at her, though he bit his bottom lip as if holding back words. Then Lucian’s words came to her. He is her husband and we have no say.
Elaina’s face heated. “Oh, dear. They thought, or think…that we…because we’re married…that.”
His laughter was slow but soon it rumbled in his chest. “I’m fairly certain that is what they are considering at the moment, given the way the two of us ran up the stairs hand in hand.”
Goodness, she certainly hadn’t meant to leave that impression on her brothers. Had she left it on Tristan? “Do you think?...it’s just that…” Oh, she wasn’t ready for intimacies with her husband yet.
Tristan put his finger against her lips, probably to stop her panicked, incoherent speech.
“I did not think you brought me here for intimacy.”
Elaina blew out a breath.
“You are still coming to know me and no matter how much I wished we could be together, it wouldn’t be right, or fair to you.”
Had he always been so considerate?
“I am anxious for when you can be mine again, I will not deny that fact. I’m holding tight onto my patience until you are ready and wish for it as much as I.” He took a step forward. “I miss what we had, what we shared, and the time we spent together in our chamber at home.”
