by Rachel Aaron
"Damn," Tina said, looking up at the beautifully hewn stone arch soaring over their heads. "I knew this wasn't the game anymore, but I was still hoping that it was generated somehow. You know, a rogue simulation or some crazy psychologist's social experiment gone wrong. Something we could still just wake up from."
"We still haven't ruled that out," James said. "I just feel that the evidence points to this being a real world that was shoehorned into a game. I could be completely wrong, though. I can't prove anything."
"And either way, it doesn't help us with our real question," Tina said with a sigh. "How do we get home?"
"The royal castle," James said immediately.
Tina arched a metal eyebrow. "Why there? I came here betting on the Portal Keepers, but as you can see, they're AWOL." She nodded at the empty room.
"They're gone from this Sanctum," James said. "But there's one keeper I'd bet money is still in his place."
"The dimensional adviser to the king," SB finished for him.
"Bingo," James said excitedly. "He's the guy in charge of the people who made portals for every alternate timeline, lost dimension, and that really weird celestial dungeon series three expansions ago. The dimensional adviser is always with the king, and he has a personal library in the royal castle that might hold our answers. Especially now that all those books aren't static art objects, but things we can actually pick up and read."
Tina's eyes lit up as her brother talked. She wasn't sure which NPC her brother was talking about--they were all just interchangeable quest fountains to her--but a library was something she could get behind. Even if the king's portal dude didn't know how to help them, she had a whole raid full of super-smart, Intelligence-geared casters. With the right books, she was certain one of her people could figure it out. She just had to get them there.
Grinning at the brilliance of her new plan, Tina clapped her hands together. She'd just intended to get people's attention, but the moment her metal gauntlets crashed together, the whole room flinched. Tina flinched as well. Apparently it was still too soon for sudden loud noises. If she wanted to fix things, she'd have to watch that.
"James, SB," she said, taking great care to keep her voice upbeat and nonthreatening. "This is great intel. Thank you very much. Going by what you've said, I think we should make for the royal castle and seek out the king's dimensional adviser. It's probably too much to hope that he'll be able to portal us all home, but he's the best lead we've found yet. Even if he doesn't know, his library is sure to have something. I say we go for it."
Most of the raiders seemed to like that idea, but while almost everyone else was nodding excitedly, KatanaFatale worriedly raised a hand.
"I hate to be a downer," the Sorcerer Officer said, "but how are we going to get into the castle?"
"What do you mean?" Zen asked.
KatanaFatale hefted up the side of his dirty purple robes and put a finger through the large arrow-hole above his right leg. "Remember the Order Fortress? All the NPCs blame us for wrecking their world. I don't think they're going to just let us use their library."
Tina and the whole group turned to look at James's NPC companion--the tall jubatus warrior whose only facial expression seemed to be "glare daggers."
"This is Fangs in the Grass. He was labeled as Arbati in the game," James said quickly, stepping between Angry Cat and the group. "I'm his adopted brother now. He's cool."
"But what about the NPCs here in Bastion?" Killbox asked.
Ar'Bati's sharp expression grew even sterner as he squared his shoulders. "You players appeared right after the Nightmare imprisoned our world," he said in weird-sounding Central. Accented Central, Tina realized with a shock. "For eighty years, we have had to fight and die endlessly for your entertainment. Even if you were not directly responsible, you were the face of our suffering. I have learned better and forgiven you, but do not expect others to have done so."
Tina ran a hand through her copper dreadlocks. "Yeah, that's about what Commander Garrond said too."
Everyone's expressions turned grim after that. Then NekoBaby popped up. "Hey, wait," the cat-girl said to Ar'Bati. "What do you mean, 'eighty years'? FFO has only been out for eight. Ten if you count that ridiculously long beta, but definitely not eighty. Full-sensory VR didn't even exist back then."
"I know the length of my imprisonment!" Ar'Bati snarled, baring his teeth at Neko as if the cat-girl's very existence offended him.
Tina stuck her giant armored arm between them. "Chill, dude," she said flatly. "She's not calling you a liar. FFO the game had two-hour-long day-night cycles so players wouldn't have to wait an actual day to do the daily story quests, so it would make sense if there was a time disparity between the real world and this one. It sucks if it was real-time for you, but it doesn't mean Neko's wrong."
That argument earned another growl from Ar'Bati before James put a hand on his shoulder and pulled the warrior back. Not that Tina cared. The cat could hiss all he liked. They were moving on.
"Okay," she said, raising her voice so everyone could hear but not so loud that it counted as shouting. "Unless anyone else has objections, we're going to the castle to talk to the portal guy. If we're lucky, maybe we can find a common enemy again and get some kinda team-up going with the king like we did with the Order."
"Or we could try conning our way in," suggested Anders. "King Gregory is called the Buffoon King. I bet he's super gullible."
"That's an idea," Tina said. "Anyone else know how we can--"
"I do!" James cried suddenly, digging into his backpack. "I know a way we can get into the castle. Take a look at these." He pulled out what appeared to be a pile of dirty looking papers.
Tina scowled. "What are those?"
"Letters," James said eagerly, opening the first scroll to show her the text written in elegant slanting script on the inside. "You remember the Once King's invasion plotline the devs were going to unroll at the end of this expansion? Well, it's still going, and it's gonna go down soon. According to these letters, the undead are planning to get around Bastion's defenses by portaling their armies straight into the Room of Arrivals. They've already bribed a portal keeper named Star Fall to open the door for them."
"Yeah, but that was in the game," Tina said skeptically. "That stuff doesn't matter anymore, dude."
"It does to the Once King," James argued, pointing at the letter. "The game might not be controlling things anymore, but he still wants to kill all the living, and this plan is already set up. Why would he abandon it?"
"Um, because we already wrecked it," Tina said. "Weren't you listening? We already beat the Once King's army back in the Deadlands. That's how we got our portal here."
"Yeah, but he has more," James said. "This was the undead expansion. The Once King has a presence in every zone, and they're all planning to--"
"Maybe they were planning to," Tina said, exasperated. "But I keep trying to tell you, this isn't a game anymore. The old plot doesn't matter. Those aren't even real letters you're holding. They're written in English! They're just leftover quest items and flavor text for players. They don't mean anything now."
"But they do," James argued furiously. "Some are in English, yes, but the rest are in Old Elven, which means they were written by the lich himself. This is a real plot that's going down right now, and if no one warns the king, Bastion will be defenseless when it shows up! The quests are all still..."
There was more, but Tina didn't bother to keep listening. There was no point in arguing when her brother got like this. Once he got something into his head, he never listened to her. She couldn't remember how many times she'd warned him something was a bad idea only to watch him charge ahead and have it blow up in his face anyway. She just wished he could be this stubborn about things that actually mattered, like school.
That said, maybe James's obsession could work to her advantage this time. After all, the king was an NPC too, and those scrolls did look super official. If James could convince the bigwigs of
Bastion that the undead were coming to kill them all, then it would be easy to pitch hiring the Roughnecks as the next logical step. And while James and his gullible NPCs were all waiting around for the plot to kick in, Tina could do the actual work of finding them a way home.
Her face split into a grin. Well, well, it looked as if her brother was useful after all. Now that she'd figured out how to use them, though, there was no way she could leave those letters with James. Whatever was waiting out there in Bastion, it was bound to be rough. Her flighty brother could barely handle raiding stress back when this was a game. Being subjected to the real thing might shatter him completely, and the last thing she needed was for James to freak out and run off with her ticket to the castle.
No. It'd be far better for everyone if the vital documents were given to someone who could actually handle the stress. James was still yammering on about "multi-pronged global offensives," though, which was why Tina just reached out and took the bag full of letters from her brother and then immediately handed them to SB.
"Wait!" James said frantically as she took them from him. "Those are--"
"Super important," Tina finished. "You made your point. But that's why I'm giving them to someone who can actually protect them."
SilentBlayde's eyes flicked toward James as he accepted the bag, but he didn't say a word. The Assassin just quietly put them into his backpack. Shoulders drooping, James turned back to Tina, but she didn't give him a chance to complain. He was getting what he wanted. He could be happy with that. Meanwhile, she had a raid to take care of.
"Listen up," she said, turning back to the crowded room full of players. "We've got our plan. The king's portal keepers are still our best shot at getting home, so they're our target."
Lots of people smiled when she said the word "home." Tina smiled back, happy to finally be getting something out of them other than fear.
"We've only got a few days of supplies," she continued. "But the royal castle has all of Bastion's four- and five-skull badasses, so if anywhere in this city is safe, it's there. James's letters should be enough to get us in the door. Once we've got the king's attention and a big new undead threat to scare him with, it should be a breeze to convince him to hire us as mercenaries. That way, we can eat his food and shoot his ammo while questioning his portal keepers on how best to get us all back to where we belong."
She finished with a smile and was immediately rewarded. Now that there was a concrete plan for going home, the nervous pall that had hung over the raid since they'd seen the burning city vanished like morning mist. All around the room, people were talking excitedly and readying their weapons to move out. Just seeing it made Tina feel ten times better. Then Zen opened her mouth and ruined her good mood.
"We should vote on it."
Tina barely clenched her jaw just in time. She'd been about to scream at the Ranger for throwing a speed bump into what was otherwise the best reaction to a plan she'd ever had. But yelling at people was what had gotten her into so much trouble in the first place, so Tina swallowed her frustration and gave Zen a polite look instead. "Why? Looks like everyone's already in agreement."
The willowy elf lifted her chin stubbornly. "You're deciding on a course of action that determines all our fates. That sounds vote-worthy to me."
In her head, Tina was cursing herself for ever allowing this stupid officer-vote bullshit to happen. But she must have made some progress during the Order Fortress mess, because she managed to keep it inside as she turned to the rest of the officers.
"Fine," she said, only growling a little. "Is anyone against going to the royal castle and getting hired by the king so we can talk to his portal master?"
Five hands stayed down, but one went up.
"What is it, Killbox?" Tina asked, glaring at her Berserker officer.
"I think we should hit the bank first," Killbox said, his handsome face splitting into a greedy smile. "You know how much loot there has to be in there? We need to get it before someone else does. Also, there's a brothel over on Shadow Street that--"
"No," Tina said flatly.
"But they have elf chicks there with giant--oof!" He stopped with a pained grunt as Zen elbowed him in his chain-covered stomach. "Okay, okay," he said, rubbing his abs. "Let's go to the castle."
"Great. We're all in agreement," Tina said, turning back to the rest of the raid before anyone else could bring up a stupid idea. "All right, folks, we're moving out! I want heavy-armored people on the outside. Rangers, casters, and other squishy types are in the center. We're not going far, so small heals are okay, but don't attack anything unless ordered. We don't know what's going on out there yet, and I don't want to earn random enemies if we don't have to."
Everyone nodded and started sorting themselves out. Satisfied with her raid's quick compliance, Tina started forward to take her place at the front and nearly ran James over.
"What?" she asked, looking down at her brother and his pet cat, who wouldn't stop glaring at her.
James glanced nervously at the readying raid, gripping his staff, which was oddly wrapped in white sheets and what appeared to be some kind of a binding charm. "Where do you want us?"
Tina shrugged. "You're a caster, aren't you? So get in the middle with--"
She paused. Her first instinct was to stick him with Zen since she was the most responsible, but Tina really didn't want to ask the Ranger for a favor right now. SB was the next logical choice since she trusted him implicitly and he and James were friends, but he was her best Assassin, and she didn't want to waste his talents on brother-sitting. She was struggling to think of someone she could trust who wasn't going to be busy or inconvenient when she got a wicked idea.
"You know NekoBaby, right?"
James winced. "You mean the jubatus healer from the old Roughnecks who does nothing but troll people?"
"That's her," Tina said cheerfully. "Here's the thing: she's a great healer, but she's reckless and prone to antics. I need you to keep an eye on her for me. You've got a warrior NPC, and even if you're stuck as a healer, you're still a black belt in real life. That's a lot of muscle, and it'll make me feel a lot better knowing Neko has an escort that can fight."
That was laying it on super thick, but sure enough, James straightened up proudly at the request. His cat-warrior also seemed less bristly now that they had a seemingly respectful assignment.
"Can do," James said. "We won't let you down, T."
Tina nodded sagely as the two jubatus started walking toward Neko, fighting not to smirk at her own cleverness. NekoBaby didn't need an escort any more than Tina did, but the Naturalist was a drama-bomb of the worst sort. If she got her claws into an earnest mark like James, she'd never let him go, which would keep them both occupied and out of Tina's hair. Two cats with one stone.
Grinning at how nicely everything was going for once, Tina walked to the doorway to take her place at the front of the raid. When she made it to the doors, SB was waiting for her.
"Do you want me to scout?"
Tina glanced at the hallway where the smoke from the burning city was curling into the Sanctum. "No. I don't want anyone out there alone just yet. For all I know, the city is flooded with three-skull monsters."
Blayde smiled and stepped into her shadow, vanishing completely. "What if I do it this way?" he asked from the dark.
Tina jumped a foot in the air. She couldn't see him at all, but she could have sworn she could still feel SilentBlayde standing behind her, like a breath on her neck. It should have been as creepy as hell, and if it had been anyone else, it would have been. But this was SB. He was the only person in the entire world Tina trusted to have her back no matter what, and that made his presence in her literal shadow comforting rather than freaky.
"That's super cool, dude," she said, waving her arm through the empty place where he should be. "When did you learn to go into other players' shadows?"
"Just now," he said proudly, his disembodied voice a whisper against her ear. "I could never get
this close in the game because of the limits the devs put in for PVP balance, but that's all gone now. Also, we're in the Holy City of Bastion, which is blessed by the Sun itself. The Lightless Realm is ultra-tame here, and that lets me get right up on top of people without them noticing. You can't see me, right? I can spy on lots of stuff for you this way."
"I can't see a thing," Tina said, grinning. "Right on! Invisible recon teams it is, then! But take ZeroDarkness with you. Invisible or not, I still don't want anyone out there alone. And don't stray too far from the raid, okay?"
Saying that made her feel like a clingy idiot. What was the point of having invisible scouts if you ordered them to stay close? But as much as she trusted Blayde's Assassin skills, she couldn't shake the two times she'd found him dead or nearly dead back in the Deadlands. "Find SB's body" was not something Tina wanted on her to-do list ever again, so even though it was dumb, she didn't take the orders back.
"I'll be careful," SB promised, vanishing from her shadow.
Tina missed him as soon as he was gone. There were gasps behind her as their other Assassin, ZeroDarkness, vanished from the raid as well, and then Tina felt a slight breeze as the two of them slipped past her out the door. That was only because she knew what to look for, though. If she hadn't been hunting for invisible Assassins, she wouldn't have noticed a thing, which made her feel better. Good enough to draw her sword and point it at the smoky doorway.
"Roughnecks! Move out!"
No one sounded particularly excited by the order, but the raid did as it was told, following her nervously out of the stone Portal Sanctum building and into the still-burning city beyond.
