by TL Alexander
“My name is Bri.”
He lifts his perfect brow. “Is it now?”
I freeze as the hairs on my arms rise to attention. “What do you mean by that?”
“I’d change it to beautiful if I could.”
My shoulders relax, but not all the way.
Mark stands next to me. “Trade?”
I nod. “Sure.” But before I do, I decide it’s time to put my foot down. “Whatever this is”—I wave a hand between Ethan and me—“I’m not interested.”
He picks up his pint and stands. “Sure you’re not, beautiful.”
I watch his fine ass as he makes his way to their table.
Mark shakes his head. “You can’t tell me you don’t want some of that.”
“There’s got to be more in a man besides a nice ass and pretty smile.”
“There does?”
“For me, yes,” I say and walk to the other side of the bar. Who am I kidding? I don’t want more.
“Earth to Bri,” Kat says.
I come out of my head. “Sorry, I didn’t know—”
“That I was standing in front of you, talking?”
I half smile. “Sorry. What did you need?”
Gary walks up behind Kat, placing his hands over her eyes. “Guess who?”
She smiles and turns around. “You’re early.”
“Couldn’t wait to see you, babe.”
They kiss, and then Kat looks around. “Where’s Tad?”
“In the restroom,” he says, and looks at me. “I wanted to check in.”
“Well, it was harder than pulling teeth, but Bri agreed to let Tad come this weekend.”
He smiles. “That’s awesome, Bri. Tad’s a great guy. I know you’ll hit it off.”
“You two already invited him, didn’t you?”
“We so did not,” Kat says.
I look at Gary.
“Okay, we did.”
Kat slaps his shoulder.
“What? I can’t take it when Bri looks at me like that. Like she can see right through me.”
A minute later, tall, blond, green-eyed, bearded Tad walks up to the bar and stands next to Gary.
“Dude,” Gary says, and slaps his back. “It’s a go, man.”
He lifts a brow in obvious surprise. “Really?”
“The more the merrier,” I tell him.
“It’s not going to be easy,” Kat says. “Bri’s a speed demon.”
“I am not. You’re a slacker. Riding my wake the whole time.”
Gary laughs. “I’d say my girl is smart.”
“Whatever,” I tell them.
One of Gary’s crew yells his way; he turns and waves.
I catch Ethan looking at me, and I quickly look away.
Kat shoves Gary. “Go on. I’ve got work to do.”
Gary kisses her on the cheek. “When you get a sec, bring us a round and menus,” he says and leaves to greet the newcomers.
I fill Gary’s order and put them on Kat’s tray.
“Thanks,” she says and hustles off.
I look at Tad. “Not hangin’ with the crew?”
“Nope.”
“Eight’s a crowd?”
“No. The guys are great. Well, most of them.”
I raise a brow.
“How well do you know Ethan Black?”
I look over at the table, catching Ethan still looking my way. Unlike all the other times he’s looked at me, this time his expression is blatantly clear. He’s mad. All but foaming at the mouth.
“How odd.”
“What?”
“Sorry. I was just thinking out loud.”
“Do you know him?”
“Ethan?”
He nods.
“I know of him. He comes in with Gary and the crew sometimes.”
“That’s it? You’re not close?”
“No, we’re not close. Why do you ask?”
“Sorry, I just assumed you two were.”
“Why would you assume that?”
“We were hanging out the other night at Gary’s. Gary mentioned your name, saying he wanted to set us up. Ethan didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to. The look he gave me….” He shakes his head.
“What are you talking about?” I ask, even though I’m sure it’s the same look he’s granting me.
“The guy’s got it bad for you. If looks could kill, I’d be six feet under.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“Maybe, but when I left that night, Ethan was standing by my car. He told me to back off or else.”
“Or else what?”
“He told me he’d tell everyone about my past. He accused me—I had a….” He looks away.
I place my hand over his. I didn’t do so because I really care, I did it because I want him to dish further. “Hey, it’s okay. Say no more.”
He looks at me. “I’d like you to know.”
“Okay.”
“I was engaged a year ago,” he says as his eyes cloud over. “She killed herself two weeks before our wedding.”
“Jesus. I’m so sorry.”
“Her parents took her death hard. I don’t blame them for what they did. They were grieving.”
“What did they do?”
“They accused me of playing a role in her death. Had me investigated. I had nothing to do with it. I was exonerated, but they still blame me. Maybe it was my fault. I knew she wasn’t herself, but I thought it was stress over wedding stuff.”
“I’m sorry,” I say but don’t quite mean it. I’ve never trusted anyone who volunteers heavy or questionable information to someone they just met.
He wipes a tear off his cheek. “Ethan said he’d tell everyone that I’d been investigated. I told him to go ahead, it was public knowledge.”
I made a mental note to have Peter check into Tad and this public knowledge. “I’m glad you’re coming this weekend. It will be fun.”
“Is Ethan coming?”
“I don’t think so. Kat said a few guys from Gary’s crew wanted to come, but they usually flake out. It will probably be just the four of us.”
He smiles and raises his brow a couple of times.
I hate to rain on his parade, but I need to set him straight. “I think it’s great that you’re coming, but—”
“Hey, I get it. I have no expectations.”
I nod even though I know he’s lying. Something about Tad isn’t quite right. At the same time, I know most everyone you meet these days isn’t quite right.
“Are we good?”
I nod. “Yes, I think we understand each other.”
His stomach growls. “Sorry about that.”
“Saves me from having to ask if you’d like to look at a menu.”
“I don’t need a menu. What do you recommend?”
“Salmon burger. Best ever.”
“Okay. Sounds good to me.”
“Fries or salad?”
“Fries.”
I place his order. “Your burger will just take a minute.” I look at the other patrons at the bar. “I’ve got to….”
“Of course. I know you’re working.”
I nod and work my way down the bar.
Mark steps close and bumps my shoulder. “What’s going on?”
“That’s Tad.”
“I figured.”
“He’s going with us this weekend.”
He grins.
I frown. “Are you sure you can’t come.”
“You know I can’t. My mother would kill me.”
“I would too if you didn’t show for my fiftieth wedding anniversary.” I pause and think for a minute. “Can you even imagine?”
He laughs. “No. Fifty years with the same guy,” he says and shakes as if he has the willies.
Three hours later, I watch as Tad, Gary, and his crew walk out. Only a handful of regular patrons, who always stay until we kick them out, remain.
I fill my last pint and begin cleaning up.
Mark does
the same. “Busy Thursday.”
I nod. “I’m going to run to the restroom before I hit the books.”
He nods.
I remove my apron and walk to the ladies’ restroom and go. When I step out of the stall, Ethan is leaning back on one of three sinks. He has his arms folded over his chest and his feet crossed at the ankles.
I walk to a sink and turn on the water. I try to act as if his presence in the ladies’ room is an everyday occurrence.
“Mr. Black. Fancy seeing you here.”
“Ms. Richards.”
“Lost?”
“No.”
“Looking for your girlfriend?”
“No. She went home.”
“Vision impaired?”
He smiles. “Nope.”
I turn off the water and shake my hands. “Mentally impaired?”
“Not that I know of,” he says and hands me a paper towel.
I take it and dry off my hands. “Okay, I’m running out of reasons for why you would be in the ladies’ room.”
“I wanted to talk to you.”
“And you couldn’t talk to me, for example, at the bar or in the hall?”
“I wanted you alone.”
I toss my towel in the trash. “Should I be alarmed by that declaration?”
“Of course not.”
I fold my arms over my chest. “Okay, Mr. Black. You have my undivided attention.”
“I don’t like Tad.”
“The Tad Pole?”
“Is that his name?”
I shake my head. “No. Why don’t you like him?”
“I don’t like the way he looks at you.”
“As opposed to the way you look at me?”
“I don’t look at you a certain way. I just look at you.”
“You do not. You squint your beady eyes. And turn up your nose.”
“I don’t have beady eyes. And my nose naturally turns up.”
“Oh, so sorry. I didn’t know that was natural. I thought you had surgery on it or something.”
He turns and looks at his nose in the mirror.
“Ha. Ha. Made you look.”
He frowns. “Now who’s the thirteen-year-old in a woman’s body?”
“Okay,” I say and look at my watch. “I need to get back.”
“Bri, I’m serious about Tad. There’s something about him that doesn’t set right with me.”
I’m not about to tell him I feel the same way about Tad and him. “Look, Ethan, I don’t know where this is coming from. It’s not as if it’s a secret.”
“A secret?”
“That you and I don’t like each other.”
“I wouldn’t say that.”
“Then what would you say?”
“That we dislike each other.”
“I believe that’s the same thing.”
He sighs. “Okay, maybe it is. But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to call someone out who doesn’t feel right.”
“Are you jealous?”
“Of course not.”
I can’t tell if he’s lying or telling the truth. I go with the truth. “Okay, so you’re not jealous, but you’re something. And you don’t need to be. I’m a big girl, Ethan. I can take care of myself.”
“I know that. I just felt I needed to say something before you agreed to go out with him.”
“Too late. He’s going this weekend.”
“On your paddle?”
I nod. “Sorry.”
He stands to his full height and walks to the door. “See you around,” he says and power opens the door. It swings back with a swoosh, swoosh, before it comes to a stop.
I look at my reflection in the mirror. “What the hell was that?”
A PAWN CAN ONLY MOVE FORWARD
Knowing the pub would be closed for four days while new brew tanks were being installed, Kat and I planned a three-day kayak trip down the coast—or is it up the coast? This is a debate Kat and I’ve had over and over.
I was excited about the up or down trip. I thought it would be a chance to let down my guard a little, to be happy in the moment for more than a moment. But that was before Tad and then Ethan.
Tad’s annoying and handsy. Two things I hate but can control. Ethan is the problem. He unhinges me. No one unhinges me. I can’t stop thinking about his odd behavior and what happened in the ladies’ room. I can’t stop thinking about him period. I’ve fantasied about him, dreamt about him….
“Earth to Bri.”
I blink. “Sorry, I was—”
“Dreaming by the fire,” Tad says and pulls me toward him, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.
I inwardly cringe but force myself to stay put. “Something like that.”
“Why is fire so hypnotic?” Kat asks.
“It’s in our DNA,” Gary answers.
She laughs. “Is that so?”
“He’s right,” Tad says. “The discovery of fire was a game changer for the first men. It provided light, warmth, cooked food, and warned off predators.”
Ethan covertly nudges my foot with his.
I not so covertly nudge his back. He warned me off Tad, again, just before we set off. I told him I knew about Tad and his fiancée. I had Peter look into Tad. No read flags. His story checked out. The police concluded that his fiancée shot herself despite her parents’ suspicions and accusations. Tad had been out of town. He had several witnesses and documentation to corroborate his story. I could only conclude that I’d read Ethan wrong; he was jealous. And I was mad that he changed his work schedule so he could come on this trip, a trip I desperately needed, if not to relax, to at least get out of my own head for a couple of days.
“I don’t know about DNA,” Ethan says as he runs his fingers through his sleeping girlfriend’s long blonde hair. “It’s hypnotic. It slows down your breathing and your blood pressure drops.”
“I think you’re both correct,” Kat tells them.
They’ve made this entire trip a competition. And I want to strangle both of them.
“I was asking you earlier, Bri, but you never answered. Where are you from?” Tad asks.
“She’s from Maine,” Kat says.
I smile her way. Mark knows more of the script than anyone, but Kat knows the part about the abusive husband and starting over.
“Which part?”
“I grew up in Portland. When my grandmother died, I inherited her home on Peaks Island. I moved there when I was eighteen.”
“Oh, yeah. I have a friend who lives on the island.”
This throws me a bit. Lots of Tad’s questions have challenged me. But he’s an intelligent, well-traveled man. He started his own engineering firm right out of college. Sold it for millions a couple of years ago. Now he travels and funds start-ups. His questions throw me, but they don’t seem out of place.
“Where?” I ask.
“Big house. Remote. Reed Avenue, I think. Where did you live?”
“Elizabeth Street.”
“Have family there?”
“No.”
Tad looks across the fire at Ethan, as if to say, I know more than you do.
Tad’s seems to have a lot going for him. I can’t understand why he, or Ethan for that matter, would be interested in me. A high-school-educated, divorced waitress living paycheck to paycheck. I know I’m not hard on the eyes, but still.
“Bri?”
“Sorry. What?”
Kat frowns. “You okay?”
“Yeah, just a little tired.”
Ethan’s latest friend, Ronda, stirs and lifts her head off his lap. “Oh my God. I fell asleep.”
“It’s been a long day,” I tell her.
“Yeah, it has. Thanks again, Bri, for saving my ass today.”
“No problem.”
Sea kayaking down the unpredictable Oregon coast is not for a novice. Ronda shouldn’t have come. It’s obvious she lied when she told us she’d kayaked the coast dozens of times. Why did she lie, I wonder? To impress Ethan? He’s pa
id her no attention, other than the annoying combing his fingers through her hair and the blatant kissing and touching whenever I look their way.
The whole weekend has felt as if I were in high school again. Or maybe this is the way people my age act. I was never around people my age. Most everyone I worked with or hung out with was at least a decade older than I was.
“Bri?”
“What?”
Kat giggles. “Where are you tonight?”
“I don’t know. High school?”
“What?”
“Never mind.”
Tad yawns and looks at his watch. “Wow, it’s past one. We should hit the hay,” he says and winks my way.
We’re sharing a tent because he accidently forgot his. I told him I would share mine, but I’m not having sex with him. He said he’s not expecting it. But I’d bet if I looked into his pack, I’d find condoms and God knows what else.
He stands. “Coming, Bri?”
“In a minute,” I say, as I swirl the wine in my cup. “I want to finish this.”
He looks a little put out but hides it well. He says goodnight and leaves us. Ronda is the next to leave. Then Gary and Kat, leaving Ethan and me alone.
He frowns my way from across the fire.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“You really need to keep an eye on Ronda.”
“Why?”
“She’s a novice. She doesn’t know what the hell she’s doing. She would have drowned if it weren’t for me.”
“I didn’t ask you to take care of her.”
“I had to because you paddled way ahead. You brought her. She’s your friend.”
“She told me she was experienced. It’s not my fault she lied.”
“I’m not saying it is. I’m saying she’s your friend. You invited her, and you need to take care of her.”
“I’m not her friend. I’m fucking her. That’s all she is to me.”
“You’re a prick.”
“Maybe. But you’re a….”
I raise a brow while waiting for him to finish, when he doesn’t, I do. “What am I, Ethan?”
He sighs. “Nothing.”
“You obviously have a problem with me. Why?”
He remains silent.
I stand. “I’m going to bed. Do you think you could…?” I point to the fire.
“I’ll take care of it.”
I nod and leave him without saying another word.
I walk to my tent and unzip the flap. Tad is reading a book with his headlamp. He looks over as I remove my shoes.
