She said absolutely nothing for a minute, and suddenly she looked afraid. “I ran away.”
He wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry as he looked at her. They were both standing in the light from the hallway. And self-consciously, he flicked on the lights in his apartment. “Come on in and we'll talk about it.” He knew however, that there was nothing to talk about. He would have to take her back as soon as they had discussed it.
As though reading his thoughts, she braced herself stubbornly in the hall. “I won't go back.”
“Why not?”
“He's drunk again, and she hates me.”
“Vanessa,” he sighed tiredly, and wished he hadn't drunk the half bottle of Scotch before she'd got there. He wasn't thinking as clearly as he should, and he was so damn glad to see her. “She doesn't hate you. She wouldn't have fought so hard to get you if she hated you.”
“She just wants me like a thing.” Vanessa sounded angry. “Like all those clothes she buys, and the crystal stuff on the coffee table and the dolls she buys me. It's just stuff. That's all I am to her. More stuff.” Teddy knew that she was absolutely right but he couldn't say so. “And I hate them.”
“Don't.” He knew she was going to have to live with them for a long, long time. The court had ruled.
“I won't go back there.” She glared at him and he sighed as he flicked on the lights.
“Vanessa, you have to.”
“I won't.”
“Come on, let's talk this over.” He was feeling a little unsteady on his feet and it was a welcome relief to sit down with her.
But Vanessa looked as stubborn as the proverbial mule. “I won't go back to them, no matter what.”
He ran a hand through his hair. “Will you please be reasonable, for chrissake? There's nothing we can do. You can't live with me if the court gave them custody.”
“Then I'll just keep running away, and they'll send me away to school.”
He smiled sadly. “They wouldn't do that.”
“Yes, they would.” Vanessa looked matter-of-fact. “She said so.”
“Jesus Christ.” For this they took her away from him? To threaten her with boarding school. “Look, nobody is going to send you anywhere, Vanessa. But you can't stay here.”
“Just for tonight?” The eyes were so big and sad that he melted and reached out his arms to her with a smile.
“Oh, princess, how did all of this happen to us?”
There were tears in her eyes when she turned her little face up to his, and once again he saw the face of his brother in this small child. “Why did Mommy have to die, Uncle Teddy? It's so unfair.”
“Yes.” He could barely speak as he thought of her. “It is.”
“Oh, please,” she said, clinging to him, her little hands warm against his shirt, “don't make me leave you. Just for tonight?”
He sighed, feeling suddenly very, very sober, and then he nodded. “All right. Just for tonight.” But he never got a chance to call Greg and Partie. Pattie called him before he could get up to call. He reached for the phone, and she shrieked at him instantly.
“Is she there?”
“Vanessa?” His voice was strangely calm. “Yes.”
“God damn it, Teddy, bring her back here! The court gave her to us, now she's ours!” Like a vegetable, or a suitcase. The very thought chilled him.
“I'll bring her back to you in the morning.”
“I want her now!” Pattie was strident, and Teddy's eyes began to blaze.
“She wants to spend the night.”
“Never mind what she wants. She's ours now, she's to do as I say. I'm coming over to get her.”
“I wouldn't do that if I were you.” His voice was smooth as velvet, but it had an edge of steel. “I told you, I'll bring her back to you in the morning. She can sleep here.”
“No, she can't. You heard what the judge said. It's unsuitable, you're a bachelor. She is not allowed to spend the night at your house,” Pattie said archly. “I want her home right away.”
“Well, she's not coming. I'll see you in the morning.”
But what he saw in the morning was not Pattie, but the police. They arrived just as he was making breakfast for Vanessa. The doorbell rang, an officer asked if he was Theodore Fullerton, he said that he was, he was told that he was under arrest, handcuffs were clapped on him, and in front of Vanessa's horrified eyes he was led away. Another officer turned off the fire under the breakfast and gently told Vanessa to get her things. For a minute she started to get hysterical and looked around her frantically.… There was something about the uniforms … the police … she couldn't place it but they terrified her.… She grabbed her doll and ran for the door, looking for Teddy. But when she got downstairs, accompanied by the other officer, the car carrying Teddy to the station had already pulled away. Vanessa was driven back to Greg and Pattie's apartment, where she was returned to Pattie with a kind word and a smile.
At the exact same moment Teddy was downtown at the station, being booked for kidnapping. Pattie had brought charges against him during the night. Bail was set at fifteen thousand dollars, an extortionate amount, and a hearing was set in front of the very same judge the next day.
The next morning, looking unshaved and exhausted, Teddy was led into court, the handcuffs were removed, and the judge glared at him for several minutes before clearing the court. He ordered everyone out of his courtroom, especially the reporters—the headlines that morning had been bad enough: SOCIALITE SURGEON KIDNAPS NIECE. There was even some subtle intimation in the piece that, given his passionate interest in her, perhaps Vanessa was his child and not Brad's.
“Well, Doctor Fullerton, I can't say that I'm pleased to see you here again. What exactly do you have to say about all this? Off the record, just for the information of the court.”
“I didn't kidnap her, your honor. She arrived at my door.”
The judge looked troubled. “Had you told her to do that?”
“Of course not.”
“Did she give you a reason?”
“Yes.” He decided to be honest. He had nothing to lose now. “She hates my brother and his wife.”
“That's not possible, she said nothing about that in my courtroom.”
“Ask her again.”
The judge looked angry. “Have you primed her?”
“I have not.” Teddy's eyes flashed. “My sister-in-law is already threatening to send her to boarding school, that's how much they love her, your honor. If I do say so myself—he looked chagrined as he smiled ruefully at the judge—”you made a very poor choice.”
The judge looked anything but pleased with Teddy's comment. “She's a very disturbed child, Doctor. You know that. She needs a normal household with a mother and a father. As much as you may love her, you are only a man.”
Teddy sighed. “My sister-in-law doesn't have a maternal bone in her body, your honor, she hated Vanessa's mother with a passion. Vanessa's father jilted her for the child's mother. In a way I think Pattie—Mrs. Fullerton—wants to get even. She wants to finally ‘take possession’ of his child at all costs, to prove something. She doesn't love Vanessa, your honor. She doesn't even know the child.”
“Is it true that the child's mother hated Mrs. Fullerton?”
“I don't think so. I think the hatred was all on Mrs. Pattie Fullerton's end. She was wildly jealous of Serena.”
“Poor woman.…” He thought of Serena and shook his head. “And your brother Gregory?” The judge looked mournful, it was the worst case he'd had in years, there seemed to be no right solution for Vanessa. “Is he fond of the child?”
“Your honor,” Teddy sighed, “my brother is an alcoholic. In my opinion he's in the very last stages of it. Not a very pretty scene for Vanessa to see, or anyone else for that matter.”
The judge shook his head and sat back heavily in his chair with a sigh. “Well, I've got kidnapping charges on you to deal with, and it looks like I should reopen the case on your niece.…” He looked as
miserable as Teddy. “I'm going to do something very unusual, Doctor. I'm going to give you thirty days in jail for the alleged kidnapping of your niece after my verdict. You may request a trial on the matter if you wish, but I'm not going to charge you with kidnapping. I'm going to charge you with contempt of court. There is no bail for contempt, and you will serve the full thirty days. In that way I can be quite sure that you won't truly kidnap her.” He glared at Teddy, who listened with dismay. “And during the thirty days I'm going to have an extensive investigation done on this matter, and I will restate my verdict in the custody matter exactly thirty days from today. That will be”—he looked briefly at his calendar—”March fourth.” With that, he signaled to the bailiff, and without further ado Teddy was removed.
49
On March fourth, at 9 A.M., Teddy was led back into the courtroom, clean-shaven and well groomed but almost twelve pounds thinner after his month in jail, and he found himself looking at his brother, his sister-in-law, and Vanessa. For him it had been an endless month and he hadn't been able to see Vanessa for the whole time, and now as he saw her his heart leaped, and he began to smile. Her eyes lit up too, and he saw that she looked a little better. Maybe she would be all right with them, after all.
The bailiff called the court to order, everyone was told to rise, the judge came in, and he frowned at them all. He informed them that the investigation conducted regarding Vanessa's custody had been the most extensive of any of his career on the bench. He told everyone present that he truly felt that they were all worthy people and that it was not a case of finding one person suitable and the others not. It had become an issue of the greatest good to Vanessa. There were certain peculiar problems to this case—the judge looked in the grown-ups' eyes, knowing that they would understand him—that made it especially difficult to select the right home for the little girl. Whatever happened, he hoped that they would all remain friendly, because he felt certain that Vanessa needed all of them around her, no matter whom she lived with. It was quite a long speech for a normally taciturn judge. He cleared his throat then, shuffled through some papers, and looked from Margaret Fullerton to her youngest son.
“Doctor Fullerton, I think you have a right to know that I had a lengthy talk with your mother.” Teddy glanced at her with instant suspicion, but he could read nothing in her eyes. “And it would seem that your devotion to the child has been not only admirable but of long and steady duration. Apparently you remained close to her mother after your brother died, from what I understand, and both Vanessa and her mother came to rely on you greatly. It is also my understanding that Mr. and Mrs. Gregory Fullerton had no contact whatever with Vanessa and her parents.” Teddy glanced at his mother in sudden amazement. Had she told the judge all that? But why? Why would she suddenly help him? “Therefore, it would seem to me that residing with you, despite the fact that you're not married, would give Vanessa a sense of continuity, which, according to the psychiatrist, is much needed. So, Doctor Fullerton, I am granting you final custody of this child.” There was a gasp from Vanessa, and she ran toward him. He threw his arms out and held her to him, and he was crying as he held her. The judge looked at them both and felt his own eyes grow damp. And when Teddy glanced at his mother, he saw that she was wiping her eyes, and he felt gratitude overwhelm him. She had finally done something decent. Only Pattie looked as though she wanted to kill them all as she stalked out of the courtroom, but Greg stopped to shake Teddy's hand and wished them both luck. He knew that it was the right thing for Vanessa.
Margaret Fullerton watched her youngest son, thinking of what had led her finally to soften toward Vanessa. The past was over with, the child was so lost without Teddy. It seemed time to let history become memory. “Perhaps I'm getting old,” she said to herself and smiled.
In the courtroom Teddy was still holding Vanessa and the two of them were laughing, and when they walked triumphantly out of the courtroom hand in hand, the photographers had a field day and they didn't give a damn.
She ran down the courtroom steps, holding Teddy's hand, like a little movie star, smiling at him from ear to ear and holding so tightly to his hand that his fingers almost went numb. He hailed a cab outside the court, and they went directly to his apartment. He hadn't seen it or Vanessa in a month, and as he turned the key in the door it felt as though he had been gone for a year. He stood at the threshold, looking down at his beloved smiling niece, not sure whether to carry her over the threshold or not, after all, they were starting a new life. Instead they stepped over it together, holding hands, and when they reached the other side, they shook hands ceremoniously, and then she stood on tiptoe and kissed him on the cheek.
“Welcome home, princess.”
“I love you, Uncle Teddy.”
“Oh, sweetheart.” He folded her in a great big hug. “I love you too. I hope you'll be happy here.” He wanted to make up to her for the past, but he knew that he couldn't do that, all he could give her was the present and what he was.
“I'll be happy, Uncle Teddy.” She looked at him with a big smile, and for the first time in months she looked like a nine-year-old child. There was no trace of the tragedy or the trauma or the anguish of all that she had been through. She threw herself on the couch, giggled loudly, threw her hat in the air, and looked like a mischievous little elf as she lay there and kicked off her shoes.
The headline that night read SOCIALITE SURGEON BECOMES BACHELOR FATHER, and it went on to reiterate for the thousandth time about his month in jail, the kidnapping charges Pattie had tried to make stick that had become contempt of court, and again all the details about the custody case. The papers had been strictly kept from Vanessa all along, and Teddy hoped that they would all get lost somewhere over the years. He didn't want any of that coming back to haunt Vanessa. She still remembered nothing of Vasili, or the baby, or her mother's murder, but she seemed much more herself now. It was just a matter of time.
50
“Vanessa? Vanessa? Are you home?” Teddy walked sedately through the front door, put his hat on the hall table, took off his coat, and peeked into the study. She wasn't there, but as he wandered through the house he suspected that she was in the darkroom. For the past four years she had spent most of her time there. He had had to give up the guest bedroom on her behalf when she discovered photography in her freshman year at Vassar, but she was so good at what she did that it was actually a pleasure.
During the thirteen years she had lived with him almost everything had been a pleasure. They had grown up together, hand in hand, learning and growing, and occasionally fighting like cats and dogs, but there was an enormous respect between them. His mother had died when Vanessa had been twelve, but that was no particular loss to Vanessa. Her grandmother had never accepted the child, and that never changed right up until her death. She left Vanessa none of her vast fortune. She left it all, equally divided, between her two sons. Two years later Greg had died, predictably of cirrhosis, and Pattie had eventually moved to London and married “someone terribly important.” From the rumors he occasionally heard, Teddy assumed she was happy, but he didn't really care if he never saw her again. Once she lost custody of Vanessa, she had entirely lost interest in the girl, and they never saw her. So over the years Teddy and Vanessa had been alone. He had never married, and he had devoted himself wholeheartedly to the task of being a bachelor father. It had its moments of absolute despair, there were moments that were hysterical beyond words, and moments that were worth an entire lifetime. When she had graduated from Vassar the previous spring, it had been a moment that he knew he would always cherish. In some ways she was as lovely as her mother had been, but it was more a similarity of spirit. She had grown up to look exactly like Brad, and sometimes it amused Teddy to see how much she was like him. She had his same long lanky blond good looks, her sense of humor was much the same, her eyes were the same gray-blue, and when she laughed, it was as though he had come back for another life, as a woman. It was extraordinary to watch her, and be with
her, she was so dynamic and so alive. It was her energy and her drive that she got from her mother. And she wanted to be not a model but a photographer. She had studied fine arts at Vassar and done very nicely, but all she cared about was what she saw in her camera lens, and after that what she did with it.
Teddy knocked softly on the door, and Vanessa answered.
“Yeah? Who is it?”
“The big bad wolf.”
“Don't come in, I'm developing.”
“Will you be through soon?”
“In a few minutes. Why?” It seemed to him that most of then-conversations were through that door.
“Want to go to dinner?”
“Wouldn't you rather play with kids your own age?” She was always teasing him that he should get married.
“Mind your own business, smartass.”
“You'd better be nice to me, I could sell that picture I took of you last week to the papers. Famous surgeon seen dressed as a bunch of grapes.” He roared with laughter at the memory. She and half a dozen friends had gone as the Fruit of the Loom insignia to a Halloween party, and at the last minute the guy who was supposed to be the grapes couldn't come, and she had pressed Teddy into service. He had been a good sport, but they had also won the prize, so Vanessa had had someone take pictures of them. “How would that look in the medical journal?”
“That's blackmail.”
“You'd better be nice to me. I just sold another picture to Esquire.” She had been free-lancing for five months now, and she was doing very nicely.
“You're moving up in the world.” He was still standing in the hallway, talking to the door. “Are you ever coming out of there?”
“No, never,” she shouted back.
“What about dinner?”
“Sounds good. Where are we going?”
“How does P.J. Clarke sound to you?”
“Terrific. I'm wearing jeans and I don't want to change.”
“So what's new?” He was teasing. She was always in jeans, with her incredible blond hair swinging, and assorted army surplus jackets and vests, which made up the rest of her wardrobe. She wanted to be comfortable enough to take pictures at all times. She was in no way preoccupied with her wardrobe.
Remembrance Page 43
