by Dessa Lux
“Well, he—”
Harry shook his head sharply. “That’s why he brought me here, I mean. Because he wants me to stay.”
Devon’s jaw dropped. He wanted to say, He didn’t bring you here, but Harry was projecting so much certainty—his voice, his heartbeat, everything in line—that it was hard not to just believe it. He wasn’t even saying it like he was trying to convince Devon of anything; he just believed that about Lir and was trying to figure things out from there.
“Wh—why do you say he brought you here?” Devon managed finally. “You washed up on the beach, he was in bed with me when he...”
Devon trailed off, realizing that he didn’t know exactly how Lir had known that Harry was there on the beach. He could have heard or sensed something; he could sense everything in his domain, everywhere in the sea. How long had Harry been in Lir’s domain before he reached the island? But Lir had been sleeping, and before that he’d been distracted by Devon, and before that...
Harry stared back at him for a moment, like he didn’t even understand why Devon was asking, but then he gave a tense little semi-smile and said, “Well, for starters, you did tell me he’s a god, and that’s usually who you blame if a miracle happens, isn’t it?”
Devon shook his head slightly, even though he couldn’t really argue with that. “I mean, he... he helped you heal, a little, but you—you washed up on the beach.”
“Did I,” Harry said, leaning back in his chair. “Seven hundred miles south of Iceland, after I froze to death in the Arctic, when this whole part of the ocean flows north. When I should have just sunk and drowned if I somehow did get into open water. And then I just happened to not only float, but float exactly to an uncharted island less than half a mile across.”
Devon opened his mouth and closed it, struggling to make sense of it, to push back against Harry’s withering look, as if he couldn’t believe Devon was stupid enough not to wonder. But he had asked Lir about this, right when Harry arrived. He had.
“The currents are all over the place right now,” Devon said. “Because of the island. There are all kinds of special currents to keep this spot warmer than it should be, to keep the island floating and bring in more plastic from other parts of the ocean to build up the island. You could have gotten caught in one of those, or—or some kind of—” Devon waved a hand, “Weird backflow caused by one of those. All of those currents converge on the island, so if you got into one, it would bring you exactly here.”
Harry frowned a little, considering, and Devon’s certainty grew. That was what Lir had told him, after all.
“It is a miracle,” Devon said firmly. “The island is a miracle. It’s probably shaking things up all over the place, and you got caught in that and it brought you here. That’s... that’s not such a bad thing, right? I mean, here you are, alive.”
Harry snorted and then shrugged, keeping his eyes down. He tapped his fingers against the corner of one of Devon’s sketches. “So you’re telling me he didn’t intend this. He didn’t... choose me, bring me here on purpose.”
Devon shook his head. “I asked him when we found you, if he knew how you got here, and he told me the same thing I told you. I mean, why would he do that? Why would he bring you here and not tell me why?”
Harry looked at Devon with his head still down, raising one eyebrow. “Why would an alpha more powerful than any I’ve ever crossed paths with want more than one omega on his magical island? And one of them with no pack alive to complain about what he does?”
Devon felt a hot rush of rage at the implication; he shoved his chair back, gripping the table edge. “He would never!”
Harry flinched from his anger instead of pushing back.
“Has he?” Devon snapped triumphantly. “Has he approached you, even looked at you?”
Harry’s shoulders curled down, his head ducking down. “He... no, I guess... He hasn’t. Yet,” Harry ended a little defiantly. “But you’re only just showing, who knows? Maybe he’s planning ahead.”
Harry sounded tired and resigned, not angry. There was fear in his scent, Devon realized when he pushed away his own anger enough to pay attention. Old fear, long since worn in, nothing urgent or new.
Devon closed his eyes and made himself think about it from Harry’s perspective. They were strangers to him, and it wasn’t like what he was talking about was unheard of; people were prone to blame an omega for not bonding strongly enough, for not being enough, but some alphas were just greedy assholes who felt entitled to as many omegas as they could get a leg over.
“Lir isn’t like that,” Devon said, making himself relax and lower his voice. “He’s an alpha, obviously, but he’s not a wolf. He didn’t grow up being told he can have anyone, any omega, just because he wants them. Which means he doesn’t know how to let you know he’s not thinking that.”
Harry tilted his head, actually listening, and Devon added tentatively, “I guess, uh, he’s been really forward compared to... what you’re used to.”
Harry looked at him, then away, then shrugged stiffly. “I, uh. I volunteered into the Canadian army so I could get to the war faster, spent a few years surrounded by humans almost all the time, so... I was never exactly a proper sheltered omega. But he’s... he’s something else.”
Devon smiled. “Yeah, he is.”
Harry relaxed a little, easing back in his seat and studying Devon. “You really... was it a love match, then, you and him?”
Devon opened his mouth to try to describe it, and then looked down, frowning. He didn’t think it was going to reassure Harry much if he explained that he’d tried to drown himself and Lir had rescued him, and his own pack, who were alive and well as far as he knew, all thought he was dead.
“It was sort of an accident, honestly,” Devon said, summoning up a smile. “But I do love him now. I wouldn’t trade him for anyone.”
Harry smiled back softly. “Well. That’s all that matters, right? All’s well that ends well.”
Devon nodded, and before he could ask Harry about the pack he’d lost, or exactly which war he’d been so eager to get into, Harry leaned forward to look at the sketches and said, “So, what are my options here? I’ve never done much construction, but I guess with a god to help it can’t be that bad.”
Devon let his own questions go; if Harry was happy staying after all, they would have plenty of time to talk about it.
“It’s honestly like building a giant sandcastle? Mud castle, really.” Devon splayed out a few of his sketches and he and Harry soon had their heads together, plans taking shape between them effortlessly.
Lir wandered in when they had mostly decided on a design, and when he asked them what they had been up to, Harry talked as much as Devon did, describing their plan.
Pack, Devon thought, watching them and resting his hand on his belly where his baby was fluttering happily away. We’re getting there.
***
Chapter 17
Devon’s happiness was incandescent; more than ever sunlight wasn’t a pet name but the simplest description, and he heated Lir all through. He could hardly keep his hands off his smiling, gorgeous omega, and it was only better when Harry just laughed at them and excused himself, which he did twice that day.
Despite the irresistible distraction of Devon, Lir managed to get the site marked out for Harry’s house. They made a plan for the next day before heading off to their beds—Harry and Devon would clear sand from the foundation area while Lir went down and fetched stones for it.
He could just have called them up from the ocean floor, had them wash ashore the same way Harry had several days earlier, but he thought it better not to remind Harry of that. The omegas thought he should go and fetch the rocks, so Lir was happy to do it their way. It wasn’t as if there was any hurry, anyway; he could keep the weather fine indefinitely, and Harry seemed content enough to sleep in the tent for now. There was no danger that he would need a roof to put over his pup’s head, or a den for his heat.
Or
would he? Going into season was usually a matter of, well, seasons, not whether an available partner was around. And even if Harry seemed to understand what Devon meant when he called Lir his mate, would his body? Would he go into heat and want Lir to help?
Would Devon want Lir to help Harry? What if they both went into heat, or...
Devon sat up beside him. “Lir?”
Lir made his expression serene. “Sunlight? You need another round before you can get to sleep?”
Devon studied him for a few seconds, then shook his head and leaned down to kiss Lir gently. “I just thought... you seem restless.”
Lir frowned. If Devon had noticed him lying still and thinking things over, that meant Devon was awake and paying attention, which he usually wasn’t at the end of a long, busy day. “Are you having a hard time getting to sleep?”
Devon huffed, then frowned, his gaze on Lir intensifying. “Yes. Because I don’t know why you’re lying here if you’re feeling so restless, so you should tell me.”
Lir shook his head. “Just wondering what’s going to happen if Harry goes into heat, but that’s not until next spring. Plenty of time to sort it out.”
Devon’s expression didn’t change, but he leaned slightly closer. “How is it going to get sorted out, do you think?”
Lir hesitated. “I’m not the werewolf expert, so...”
Devon kept watching him, chewing on his lip now as his eyes seemed to search Lir’s, as if he were trying to see down into the depths. But Lir knew well that sunlight could only reach so far.
“Harry was worried about that,” he said finally. “That maybe you wanted him here because you wanted an extra mate.”
Lir shook his head. He hadn’t wanted anyone else on the island; Devon had. Lir would have been perfectly content with his mate and no one else. “You’re the only mate for me, sunlight. I want him to be here if you want him to be here, and if he’s happy here. That’s all.”
“If I want him to be here.” Devon drew his knees up like a barrier between them, wrapping his arms around his legs.
Lir pushed up on one elbow, nodding. “You—”
“Is that why he’s here?” Devon asked. “Because I told you I wished we had a pack here, on the island, and—”
Lir hadn’t said anything, but Devon reacted like he’d answered, cutting off and going pale.
Lir opened his mouth and closed it, wondering how to explain.
“You lied to me,” Devon whispered. “I asked you if you knew how he got here and you told me you didn’t know.”
“Well,” Lir said, because he’d actually been careful with that part. “No, I just told you it could’ve been—”
Devon abruptly pushed backward, scrambling back from Lir and right off the bed, as if Lir’s words were an attack. Lir sat all the way up, reaching out his hands. “Sunli—”
“Don’t call me that,” Devon snapped. “Fucking hell, Lir, what—what did you do? Is that why you went north? You lied to me about having to go see your father, and you—you—what?”
“I didn’t lie,” Lir insisted. “I did have to see my father, because I knew his domain would be where anyone was like that—frozen for so long they wouldn’t have any other pack or family—”
Devon plastered both hands over his mouth, looking a bit like he was trying desperately not to be sick, except it was obviously nothing like the morning sickness. Lir had done this, somehow, by what he’d said, by letting Devon find out what he’d meant for Devon not to have to know. He talked faster, trying to fix it.
“You didn’t want to be alone! And I thought—why not find someone else alone, someone who could be alive and happy if I just brought them here. So I went to my father’s domain and asked. I would have begged him, Devon, I would have done anything he asked to get someone for you, so you wouldn’t be lonely, but he just let me! So I found Harry, and got him started on his way home, and then I came back to you, before it got dark. Like I promised. I wouldn’t break a promise to you, sun—”
Lir bit his lip, not letting himself say it, because Devon had told him not to.
“But I asked you,” Devon said in a small voice, from behind his hands. “I asked you, and you knew what I meant. Even if you didn’t exactly lie, you kept it secret from me. And from Harry, you think he doesn’t deserve to know?”
“Fine, I’ll tell him,” Lir said, throwing up his hands. “I told him he could leave if he wanted to—if you think it’s better for him to go, he can go! I just wanted him to be happy, so you could be happy! If he’d rather be dead—” Lir flung his arm out. There was plenty of sea for Harry to drown in.
“Like I did?” Devon asked, lowering his hands. “Would you save him if he called out to you? Do you always save people when they ask you to? Or was it just me?”
He couldn’t just say yes or no to that, and he thought... it hadn’t just been Devon, had it? There had been someone else, someone before. Lir could almost remember. Why couldn’t he remember?
“People mostly don’t ask,” Lir said, struggling to dredge up the memory, to think at all when Devon was so unhappy. He was only a land-dweller, small and soft, but somehow his anger was as all-encompassing as Father North’s right now. It felt as if Lir’s whole domain had become lightless and cold because Devon was unhappy with him. “And I needed a land-dweller, anyway, because Father—”
Lir cut off sharply and looked up at Devon, who was staring at him with wide, dark eyes, his face bloodless.
That’s what he would have looked like if I let him drown, Lir thought, staring, and then Devon whirled and darted out into the main room. Lir jumped out of bed to follow.
“Devon! It wasn’t—whatever you’re thinking, it wasn’t—Father just wanted me to prove I could care about land-dwellers, and—”
Devon pulled out the phone that Mar had given him, and Lir stopped short, staring. “Who are you calling? Are you calling Caroline?”
Lir felt a sudden awful panic, waves rising, currents running in every direction at once, lightning cracking the sky.
“Mar!” Devon shouted, over the sudden wind. “I’m calling Mar!”
Lir shook his head, reaching for the phone, reaching for Devon. “You can’t—you can’t leave me! Not like that! Sunlight, I—”
There was a sudden pain in his thigh, and he looked down to see that Harry was there, in his wolf form, jaws clamped on Lir’s leg. He let go as Lir stared, backing up to keep himself between Lir and Devon, and Devon dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around Harry.
“Lir, calm down!” Devon shouted. “You’re scaring him, the storm is scaring him! You’re scaring me! Make it stop!”
Devon was angry, and frightened, and holding on to Harry as if he expected Lir to cast both of them out into the stormy sea. There was probably some way to make it right, to make him understand, but Lir couldn’t bear it, all of a sudden, and Devon had finally asked for something he couldn’t do. He couldn’t calm down, and he couldn’t hold back the storm. He couldn’t even hold himself in place. This tiny form wasn’t enough to contain him.
He let himself dissolve right there, becoming one with the ionized air, with the screaming wind and the crackle of lightning, letting it carry him into the dark, raging sea. He became a vastness of salt water that ought to have been enough to drown the narrow track of tears on Devon’s cheek.
***
Chapter 18
Even after Lir vanished into it, the sudden storm didn’t stop. Harry stayed pressed against him, shaking, and after another moment Devon recognized the wolf’s fear wasn’t only a reflection of his own.
He pressed his cheek against Harry’s fur, steadying his wrists against Harry’s body as he opened a text message on the phone he’d never used. There was only one contact.
Please come get me Lir made a huge storm
We’re scared please hurry
He disappeared I don’t know what to do
He thought he should explain more—had Lir even told Mar about Harry being o
n the island? Could Mar get through if Lir didn’t want to let him, or if the storm kept up? What was he going to do if Mar was sleeping, or if Lir blocked the signal, or...
The phone buzzed. On my way, sit tight.
Devon sobbed with relief and wrapped his arms tighter around Harry, still clutching the phone in one hand. “Mar’s coming, he’ll do something. He can help.”
Harry whined softly and curled himself around Devon while Devon kept holding on to him.
The scream of the wind went silent so suddenly that Devon thought he’d gone deaf. He scrambled up to his feet just as Mar came through the door. No hat tonight—his long hair and beard were wet streamers of blackness—but he had his cloak on, only to sweep it off and hold it out to Devon.
“Come on,” he said. “I don’t expect my brother to stay quiet for long. I can’t control him in his own domain, but I can bring you to mine, at least until he calms down.”
That was a better plan than anything Devon could think of; it was obvious Lir wasn’t going to calm down and talk sensibly about this anytime soon, and Devon needed to know what was going on with him—his father, his lies about Harry...
Devon half straightened up, not letting go of Harry, and Mar noticed the wolf.
“Ah,” Mar said. “I was wondering if—well. We’re bringing him with us?”
Devon nodded. Harry showed no sign of wanting to take human shape, so Devon shifted his grip and stood. Lir wouldn’t have let him lift something as heavy as Harry since he’d gotten pregnant, but—
Devon hid his face against Harry’s fur, and Mar came closer, settling his cloak over Devon’s shoulders and tugging it closed over Harry in his arms.
“Here we go,” Mar said, using one hand to hold the edges of the cloak together and curling the other arm gently around Devon’s back. Devon leaned into him, Mar’s grip tightened, and there was a rushing of air. He felt rain or sea spray pelting against the cloak, but only distantly, and then it stopped, and Mar let go.
Devon’s head jerked up, terrified of being abandoned, but they had arrived.
