by Marie Cole
I looked between him and Stacy and sighed softly. "It's not you I want to punch. Not really."
Stacy exhaled in relief as Kent's eyes opened. "So you don't want to hit me now?" his hands slowly moved back to his sides.
As I stared at him the image of who I really wanted to hurt was in my head. Kyle, Kyle who had hurt me and had taken the one thing that I hadn't even really wanted to give to him. I couldn't ever get that back. I couldn't get that moment back. That's what hurt the most.
I pressed my lips together tightly so that I wouldn't sob and shook my head, my eyes dropped as the tears spilled down my cheeks. It felt like an eternity before I felt Kent's strong, warm arms come around me.
"Quit crying. We're gonna go do something fun," he said softly. He swayed slowly with me in his arms.
"Like what?" My voice sounded foreign to my ears, it was thick with tears.
"Can't tell you that, Els. It would ruin the surprise."
Chapter Twenty-Six
After we'd both showered and I'd said goodbye to Stacy, Kent put me in his crappy car and ran around to join me. I settled back into the passenger seat which used to fit my body like a glove. It sagged a bit now. I buckled up and smiled as he did the same. "Are you going to tell me where we're going now?"
"No. Quit asking or I'll turn this car around."
I scoffed, "I dare you."
He looked over at me with a sly grin on his lips, "You dare me, huh?"
I met his grin with a challenging lift of my eyebrows and an indifferent shrug of my shoulders. "Yep. Turn this car around. See if I care," I said. He turned the car on and carefully backed out of the space as some offending metal band screamed through the speakers. "Oh my god! How can you listen to that?" I covered one ear and put the other to my shoulder to try to block it out as I reached forward with my other hand to turn it off.
He was snickering beside me. "It gets me out of my head for a little while."
"What's wrong with being inside your head?"
"Lots of things. So... it was awful, huh?"
I really didn't want to talk about this. Not with him. He obviously didn't take it seriously. I'd been sober when I'd lost mine, unlike Kent had been, and I would remember every single detail for the rest of my life.
"Yep. It wasn't great, that's for sure."
"Well if it makes you feel any better it wasn't really good for me until...," he trailed off and then sighed. "Alright, I can't lie to you. It's pretty much always good for me. But I'm a guy. I am pretty sure that it's different for you chicks."
His tone was relaxed but his body was tense, he gripped the steering wheel tightly, showing white knuckles. And he kept clenching his jaw, it flickered beneath his skin.
"We don't have to talk about this, you know." I looked out the window, "I'd actually prefer it if we didn't talk about this. It's...weird."
He sighed loudly and he mumbled, "Thank god," under his breath. His body instantly relaxed behind the wheel. I shook my head a little. Same old Kent. Sex and me didn't go together. Ever. Not in his world. That much hadn't changed.
I looked around as we pulled into a parking spot, trying to figure out where he'd taken us. The bright white sign above the building was a dead giveaway. He'd brought me to the liquor store. I looked at him and frowned. "What are we doing here? Neither of us are old enough to get booze."
He put his hand on my shoulder and gave me a look of pity. "Oh, Els. You stay here, you can't go in there, you'd blow my cover." He chuckled as he got out of his car and went into the store. I looked around nervously as I waited for him. What if a cop came and saw me in the car outside the liquor store? What if a robber came by and tried to do the deed while we were here? What if... I didn't get to finish my thought because Kent came back to the car with a large brown paper bag in his arm. He tried to the handle but I'd locked the car. He knocked on the window and then stooped down to look at me. He cocked his head to the side and raised his eyebrows causing me to giggle.
His voice was muffled through the glass, "Come on, Elly. Open the damn door." He stood back up and looked around, waiting for me.
I unlocked the door and then, just before he could open it, I locked it again. He stooped down and frowned. "Elly!"
I grinned some more. I could've done that all night but when I noticed that a cop had pulled up a few spaces down I unlocked the door and hunched down in my seat. Kent got in casually and twisted around to put the bag in the backseat. "Play it cool, Els. You're going to get us caught."
I shook my head, staying low in my seat as the cops got out of their cruiser. My view was blocked when Kent's body came over mine, his head ducking between my neck and shoulder. His breath on my skin tickled and caused me to giggle and push him away. I tried, anyway, but he was too heavy. "Kent!"
"Just pretend I'm making out with you, weirdo."
"Won't that make them stare?"
There was a pause before he pulled away and started the car. "You're right." He tugged on my seatbelt and then pulled out of his parking spot. I wasn't sure where we were going now, but with alcohol involved it was sure to be a good time regardless, right?
We drove for fifteen minutes, through the city, past the suburbs and onto a few winding roads until we stopped in front of a very tall metal structure.
"You are lucky that I know you well to know that you don't want to kill me. Please tell me this isn't where you take Jen on dates."
He laughed as he got out of the car. He came back in, his hands on his seat as he leaned towards me, "No. Jen knows nothing about this secret spot of mine. And you'd better not tell her. It would be a friendship-breaker."
I raised one brow, he was being weirder than usual. "Alright. I don't think you have to worry about that. I'd have to actually talk to her first."
He leaned over more and kissed my forehead quickly before grabbing the bag. I wiped his kiss off my head and then got out of the car too. I took a step back so that I could look all the way to the top of the tower. This could be fun.
Luckily it wasn't too windy and the cold chill of fall had yet to settle. It was a warm night, perfect for being up high where the bugs would leave you alone. "So you've been here before?"
"Yep. And it's completely safe, unless you jump off. I can't guarantee that you'll live if you do that."
"Sounds reasonable."
He chuckled and led the way up the metal ladder. He was a little slow because of the booze he was holding. When we got to the top I took a few minutes to walk around and check it out. I got down onto my belly and pulled myself to the edge to have a look all the way down. Just as my neck was clear of the edge I felt something clamp around my calf.
"Don't jump!"
I screamed and kicked my legs. I heard Kent laughing behind me. He loved scaring me, the jerk. I rolled over and sat up. "That was not funny!" I yelled at him.
"Says you. You couldn't see the look on your face."
"And neither will you when I punch you in both your eyes."
He chuckled as he sat down beside me and opened a brown glass bottle with the picture of a peach on it. "So violent today, Els. What happened to the little innocent grunge singer I used to hang out with?"
"She was abandoned by her best friend when he started dating a blonde bimbo." I grabbed the bottle from him and took a swig. It burned and only faintly tasted of peaches. I coughed as I pushed the bottle back to him. He took it and was smiling at me when I could open my eyes to look. "What?" I barked.
"I've missed you. That's all."
The way his eyes stared at me, like he was soaking me up, seeing me for the first time, made me uncomfortable. I nudged him and looked away, "You're not drunk enough to get mushy with me." My heart was beating wildly in my chest. I wanted nothing more than for him to get mushy with me. I wanted Kent, for myself. Part of me was hating him for making me give my v-card to another dude. It should've been him and it should've been years ago, even if I was fatter.
I heard the liquid swish inside the bottle as
Kent took a swig. "You know, I was wondering if you'd still had it. I thought maybe you'd lost your virginity a while ago."
I laughed, amused that he would think anyone was interested in fat Elly. He hadn't been, why on Earth would he have expected for someone else to be? "Yeah, no." I sighed softly after I took the bottle from him and took another drink.
"The way you talked about Tony I thought for sure..."
I took another drink. I had made Tony up the summer between high school and college, hoping to make Kent jealous. It hadn't worked. "Nope."
"Huh. Well, it's done with now. And you feel like you're at the bottom, right?" I nodded and he continued, "So there's nowhere left to go but up."
And up we were. I kicked my legs and stared at the blackness underneath them. "Why did you bring me up here?"
"Because when I'm feeling upset this is where I like to go. To put things into perspective. Nothing has ever been so bad that I've wanted to jump, so that's a good thing, I guess." He reached out and tried to take the bottle but I held tight. Our eyes met and I saw in his something sad. Loneliness? Regret? I wasn't sure. He tugged and I tugged back and soon I was on top of him, laughing. And a moment later he stopped laughing and stared at me as I'd seen him stare at me before when we were younger and alone in his room. He looked as if he were going to kiss me. But it never happened in the past and it wasn't going to happen now. And before he could reject me I rolled over and stared at the stars.
I pointed to a group of stars, "Look, it's Kyle's penis."
"There?" He motioned with his finger to a large cluster of stars.
"No," I said. "There." I motioned, outlining something very small.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
I walked into the Art History class on the first day of the new semester and found a pleasant surprise sitting in the back of the class with his notebook out and his pencil writing furiously. Kent.
He didn't notice me as I slowly approached him, like a cat stalking its prey. I grinned as I sat down beside him, whispering as I pulled out my pen and flipped my notebook open, "I heard this professor is a real hard ass..."
Kent looked up from his notes towards my familiar voice. "Wait... you have this class too?" He looked around as if he was going to be punk'd or something. A small smile formed on his lips as his eyes settled on me.
"Yeah...gotta get that art credit somehow. And you know me, I'm no artist when it comes to my hands." I smacked my forehead and shook my head. "That...came out wrong."
A little blush touched Kent's cheeks as he laughed. "Oh, Elly. Still the slip of the lips, I see. I'm excited to have some time carved out three times a week to talk to you."
The professor walked in and the lights went down. I looked at Kent in the darkness, the only light shining on his face was from the slides the professor projected onto the front wall of the classroom. I wondered what he would do if I touched his knee. Or blew in his ear. I was still slightly sore from my disaster of a date but it was quickly sliding away the longer I stared at him. He'd always been cute to me but damn. He was turning into the quite the man.
I forced myself to focus on the lecture and write down some notes. I was doing very well in college and I wasn't about to fudge that up now. My mother would kill me.
Halfway through class I cleared my throat and whispered to Kent, "You were saying about the talking part?"
Kent chuckled softly and whispered back, his breath on my neck giving me goosebumps and hard nipples. "I was saying that I'm really looking forward to talking with you after class."
The professor stopped in the middle of his discussion about surrealism and Salvador Dali. "I see I'm boring a few of my students. Mr...?"
Kent turned his face away from me and I felt a loss and a squeeze in my chest. The professor was staring at Kent with an eyebrow raised, the slide projector remote pressed against his rounded belly.
"Lytle... sir..."
The professor grimaced, clearly annoyed. "Would you like to talk about Salvador Dali since you seem to be interested in speaking during my lecture?"
Kent ran his hand through his hair. Oh god, what had I done? Was he going to flunk art history class because of me? I was about to speak up when Kent started to speak.
"He was born in 1904 in Spain, died in 1989. He's the father of surrealism in today's standards of art. His most elaborate work was titled 'The Persistence of Memory' crafted in 1931."
After Kent spoke some of the other students mumbled to each other, awed by the balls he had to make the professor look like a dick. And impressed that he knew his shit.
The professor didn't look happy, his humiliation tactic had failed and blown up in his face. "Mr. Lytle. I'd like to see you after class, please." As the professor continued on with his lecture Kent looked at me and winked.
I couldn't help but giggle. Good thing Kent did some studying before class. Had the professor called on me I'd have been embarrassed just as he would've wanted. And I never would've said another peep in his class again.
I scribbled notes in my notebook and five minutes before the end of class I realized my leg was pressed against Kent's. I sat up, pulled my leg away, and immediately missed the warmth he'd provided. I continued to write notes, nibbling on the end of my pen when it wasn't something I felt I needed to write down.
The lights went up signaling the end of class. Kent rustled his things to get it in the bag. "You asleep yet?" He asked as he stood with me. "Oh, and since I haven't had the chance to tell you, you look awesome, Elly. I mean it. I'm proud of all your hard work." Kent put his arm over my shoulder.
"Mr. Lytle. My office, please." The professor killed our mini-moment.
I tried not to make a big deal of it, but I couldn't stop the tingles coursing through my body despite the fact that it had been an innocent, platonic touch. It had been a few months since Kent had touched me and, as usual, he still made my heart rate go through the roof and my loins sizzle. "Oooooh. You're in trouble." I teased, slapping him playfully on his arm.
"Well, if someone wasn't trying to talk to me, maybe I wouldn't have had to be a smart ass."
"Like it's my fault you're a smart ass," I scoffed.
He was still grinning as he started down the stairs towards the exit. "You want to grab a tea and hang out outside? If the professor doesn't murder me, that is."
"Um...maybe some other time. I've got an audition to get to." I smiled softly and gathered up my notebook.
Truthfully, I didn't want to catch Jen's shit if she saw us outside having coffee together without her. I wondered if Kent was going to tell Jen that we had a class together...in the dark. And I'd love to be a fly on the wall if and when he did tell her.
"Alright, well," he stood there awkwardly for a moment, "good luck with the audition then. If I don't see you later then I guess it'll be Wednesday in here."
Kent smiled at me over his shoulder as he slipped out the door. I watched him leave and immediately felt the loss. I exhaled loudly and stared at the ceiling for a moment as I collected my nerves.
I looked up to the seats at the top of the lecture hall as I was leaving and didn't see the incoming guy. We collided with full body contact and fell backwards, our things falling between us. "Ooh, I'm sorry!" I was blushing as I gathered up my notebook.
The guy was smiling, a dimple in his chin like Kent had. But this guy was blonde and a little taller and he had blue eyes. He was staring at me as he blocked the doorway. I smiled nervously and hugged my notebook to my chest. "Are you going to let me through? I have to get to another class."
"I do too. But I think you should pay a fine for almost killing us both by not looking where you were going." His hands slipped into the front pockets of his jeans and my eyes followed. My knees almost gave out when his thick southern accent coated his words.
I swallowed hard as the outline of his penis pushed against the front of his pants. I pulled my gaze to his face, sure that my face was beet red from blushing. Suddenly I wasn't a virgin anymore and I was che
cking out every guy's junk. "Oh? And, um...What do you want? To bully money out of me?"
"No, no, darlin'. I just wanna take you out to dinner."
"I can't." I looked down further, taking note of his cowboy boots.
"Why not?"
"I don't date men who listen to country music. It's against my values." His laughter vibrated through me and I clutched my notebook tighter, sure that I was going to faint if he kept hitting on me. He was hot, like really hot.
"Imagine my luck. I stopped listening to it this morning. Went cold turkey."
"Sounds like you'll be in a sour mood then and not good company for dinner," I said.
He laughed again and I nearly melted. "You're really gonna make a cowboy beg?" He kept his hands on the doorway and leaned forward, speaking lowly into my ear. The hot breath accompanying his words sent tingles between my thighs. "I'll do it, pretty girl. Please don't embarrass us further. It's just dinner."
"Okay, fine." I stepped back and tried to act as if I weren't affected. "I'll meet you a Mexicali at nine tonight. Don't be late."
He winked at me and then made his way past me, purposely brushing his arm against my chest as he passed, heading for an empty seat. I felt his eyes on me as I left the lecture hall and I couldn't shake the smile he'd put on my face.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Mexicali was terrific and it paved the way for several more dates with Mr. Will, the cowboy. I waited for him after every Art History class just so I could make out with him for a few brief minutes before he had to disappear into the lecture hall for his PoliSci class. The chemical touches from Kent only warmed me up for the giant sparks that flew between Will and I.
I made sure he bought me at least three dinners before hopping in the sack with him. Three weeks passed and as suddenly as it'd started he'd stopped calling. He made out with me before class Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, but blew me off when I tried to make plans with him in the evenings.
