by Marie Cole
I shrugged my shoulders and pasted on a smile, "He didn't want me, Jen. He wanted you. He picked you, over and over again."
I made sure I emphasized that for both our sakes. It was easy to romanticize the past, and think back and remember things that weren't truthful.
"I always thought he wanted you. Sometimes I still wonder if he does." She stuffed the used tissue into her large designer purse and stood up.
I stood up too, "You're just hurt. You'll see things clearly tomorrow. Kent loves you. He adores you. How could he not?" I smiled again and reached out, squeezing her elbow affectionately.
She smiled back and sighed softly, looking at the ground in shame. "I'm sorry, Elly. You're right. You're such a good friend."
She hugged me, tail between her legs so to speak. I smiled for her sake as she pulled back and straightened up, the rich bitch face back on.
"Now for my fun. Do you want to come with?"
"I'd love to but I have to be up early for work in the morning. Drink a Long Island for me." I grinned as I watched her walk around the SUV.
She opened the driver's side and paused, "Will do! Thanks for coming tonight, Elly. I hope to see more of you and Dave. You two look really great together."
She smiled a little, waved and then got in and closed the door. I watched as she pulled away from the curb and sighed heavily. I had one more stop to make and it was going to be too long to walk. When she was out of sight I hailed a cab.
Chapter Fifty-Six
I paid the taxi driver and got out into the dark evening, shutting the door softly behind me. I looked up, tilting my head back, and stared up at the darkened dilapidated tower that I liked to call Kent's brooding place.
Whatever had gone down with Jen was surely what had brought him here, if he was even up there. I'd bet tomorrow's breakfast that he was. I slowly made my way up the metal ladder to the top of the tower. I stared into the darkness when I reached the top, trying to make Kent's shape out from the rest of the shadows. The breeze that made the trees sway washed over me, and I shivered.
After my eyes adjusted I caught sight of his form. Right on the edge of the tower he sat with his legs dangling over the side. His tie was loose around his neck and his jacket was balled up and resting not far from him looking like a sleeping, disheveled cat. This is where he always came to clear his head. This was where he came to make his decisions and let his anger and frustrations out. The first time I found him up here was after we had a big fight about Jen in high school.
I stepped forward, coming up behind him slowly. My heels were the only sound aside from the wind which was still blowing past my ears.
"Don't jump. I would be devastated." I hoped my joke would land and sighed when I was unable to get a chuckle from him.
"Jumping is not the hard part, it's the landing at the bottom that sucks. Seconds of freedom and flying, and for what? Pain for the rest of your life? Shouldn't you be off having fun somewhere with Dave?" Kent hadn't looked back at me yet. "Why are you here?"
I sighed softly when I was unable to get a chuckle from him. I sat down beside him carefully. After a fall off a stripper pole a couple of years ago I developed a fear of heights. I dangled my legs over the edge too. I put my hands in my lap and stared at him, my head turned to the side.
"I ran into Jen. So I couldn't possibly have fun knowing that my best friend was probably very hurt because his wife returned his gift."
"If she would have bought that dress herself, she would have loved it." He shook his head and let out a defeated sigh. "I bought it for her and she decided it was too much. I should be able to buy my own wife a gift with the money I work so hard for." The muscles in his jaw worked as his teeth clenched together, a bit of anger showing through his usually calm facade.
"I think maybe she just wants your time," I clasped and unclasped my hands in my lap, unsure of how he would receive my feedback.
Kent nodded his head. "I know that's what she wants. We tried that already. I put one of the guys in charge of each place and I took time off. Without me being there though business was lacking and was dropping off. No people equals no money. Soon she was telling me I needed to be there. Now you can see why I'm such a fucking mess, Elly." Again his head shook back and forth. "We're not doing well, Elly. Not at all."
Kent may have given up but Jen didn't seem like she had just yet. It was up to me to push my friend to fight. He picked Jen as his first kiss, his first girlfriend, his first everything and I wasn't going to let his momentary anger over a dress cause him to do or say something that was going to jeopardize what he built his most of his life to accomplish.
"Maybe not now, but it's obvious that you both still want it to work out. And that's something, isn't it?" I hated seeing them like this. They both needed a push towards each other. Maybe counseling.
He turned his head and looked at me for a long moment. His eyes were red rimmed and it was obvious that he'd been crying.
"It's just hard, Elly. I work so hard to give her the things she obviously wants, but she just doesn't seem to enjoy it. I...I--," his words broke off as his gaze turned back out towards the city.
This was hard for me too. Seeing him in pain, wanting to comfort him, but refraining. I hadn't touched him for longer than thirty seconds since the night of his bachelor party.
"You're not happy and she's not happy," I swallowed the lump in my throat as I looked at his tear stained cheeks. "You need to do what will make you happy, Kent."
"I just don't want to think about work. I just want to play a video game or watch a movie," he shook his head. "I just want to have some fun for once instead of worrying about everything else."
"Then close your expansion stores and keep the most lucrative one open. Take your life back and let Jen know that X is how much money you're going to make. Then take time to play a video game or watch a movie." I sighed softly, the fight leaving me as quickly as it had come. "I work a lot too, Ken. Two jobs. But I still manage to find time for fun. I'm not sure that this is all her fault."
"I already told her I'd get rid of one and wouldn't open the other. She told me no. I've had offers on the business, but I've turned them down. I've tried, Elly. I have."
"It's your business, Kent. And it's your life. You need to stop letting her steamroll it, if that's what you feel she's doing here."
I watched him, letting him run what I'd said through his mind a little longer. I turned my attention to the city landscape, it all looked so small from up here. Perspective was everything. From my perspective Kent was tired of Jen being unhappy with everything he'd tried to give her. And Jen was tired of feeling alone in her marriage.
Kent sat there for a moment before he finally spoke up, "I got some Mountain Dew at the house and I DVRed an old scary movie. You game?"
I opened my mouth to accept right away but paused. What would Jen think if she came home and saw me with Kent watching a movie on their couch? Would she care? Was she allowed to care? I was just his friend. But I had told her that I was tired and needed to get home for my early shift tomorrow. And shouldn't Kent be spending this time with Jen to try and work things out?
"What about Jen? Shouldn't you ask her first? She also mentioned to me that she wanted to have some fun tonight. Maybe you two could spend some time together?"
He scoffed. "Then that means she was going to go out with her girlfriends. That means no dudes allowed. Sounds like that clears me to hang out with my best friends. Yeah?"
"....I have to get up early for work in the morning?" I had to try to use the same excuse on Kent as I did with Jen, at the very least. "You should call your other friends instead, like Mike or Paul..."
"It's been too long since I've hung out with you, Elly. Sometimes when you get pulled knee deep into life you forget the important things, like your real friends. I have to get up early too. I have some businesses to sell and some life to recapture. C'mon, I'll even sweeten the deal with a pedicure."
&
nbsp; I hesitated. I had purposely not spent time alone with him in any setting outside of his office. My fatal mistake was looking him in the eye. Seeing the hope and desperation there, I couldn't resist any longer. I sighed and turned around, crawling a bit away from the edge before standing up.
"Fine. No toe nail painting, though." Even if I went over to his house, it didn't mean I had to have him touching me. It was basically the same thing as me touching him and it was a very non-platonic thing to do.
"What, don't paint your toenails anymore? You used to bug me about that all the time." Finally he chuckled as he pushed back from the edge and grabbed his jacket. He stood up and moved towards the ladder, waiting for me to join him. I closed the distance between us.
"That was back in high school. I pay someone to do it now," I hated lying to him but it was easier than the truth. I stood next to the ladder and looked down briefly. "You have to go first. If I fall I want you to be there to break it." I smiled innocently to him.
Chapter Fifty-Seven
Kent was starting to come out of his emotional funk.
"Alright, well I guess that will work. I'll make sure not to look up then Miss I'm-Wearing-A-Fancy-Skirt."
I knew he was being serious. He was always proper and gentlemanly, even when we were teenagers. But he probably was just like that with me because he saw me as a friend, like one of the dudes. If I didn't keep reminding myself of that I might let my old feelings resurface. They had to stay buried deep. I didn't want to be hurt like that again.
"You'd better not."
I waited for him to start down and then headed down behind him. Once he was halfway down I screamed, looking down to see if he was going to look up. When he looked up and spotted the black thong under my skirt he blushed, his cheeks burning with his embarrassment. I didn't get to see them for more than a second though before he was looking down at his feet, concentrating on the task at hand.
I grinned at my victory, "You owe me next week's allowance."
"Bah, playing on my chivalry to get money out of me. You never did play fair!" Kent chuckled as he reached the bottom and stepped back to wait for me to come down the rest of the way.
I huffed softly when my heel connected with the ground. "Oh, thank God, I made it! I wish you'd pick a less vertical spot to lick your wounds. Are you going to call the cab or do you want me to?" I already started pulling my phone from my purse, shivering as the wind sent a gust over us.
I felt something sliding over my shoulders. I gazed at the jacket that Kent was no longer wearing and looked at him, his tie was slightly blowing in the breeze.
"Call a cab? We could just walk. It isn't that far."
I pulled the jacket closed in the front and slipped my phone back into my purse. "Thanks. Let's go before my feet fall off."
We walked beside each other, untouching and then I heard him chortle. "Feet fall off. You want a ride?" He pointed to his back with his thumb. "First one's free, then you owe me lunch."
I laughed softly and shook my head, "No, thanks. I'll survive." What was with him wanting to touch me all of a sudden? He went from not even looking at me during dinner to wanting to grab my ass and call it a piggy-back ride. I mentally tried to count how many drinks he'd had. It hadn't been enough to make him drunk.
"Alright, then." He chuckled to himself as we moved on towards the house he shared with his wife. We went over idle small talk, like how my work was going, how he couldn't find anyone to manage a business and soon enough we were walking up the driveway to the large house.
I hadn't been over much except for the occasional dinner party where Jen tried to set me up with her few single male acquaintances. I smiled patiently as I waited for Kent to open the door. I entered the house and looked around, nodding. Everything was different.
"Jen has good taste."
"She's done all the decorating, as you know. I just pay for the stuff." He shut the door behind us. "Just toss the jacket on the coat rack if you want. I'll get us some Dew and meet you on the couch!" For the first time in a long while he seemed really excited, more like the Kent I'd known most of my life.
I put his jacket up as he'd instructed and then made my way into the living room. I sat down on the beautiful yet uncomfortable couch, pulling my shoes off slowly one by one. I let them drop to the floor and pulled my feet up under my skirt. I looked around in amazement. Their living room looked like something out of a decorating magazine. There was nothing but intentional clutter, beautiful art, and expensive furniture. No personal pictures, no dust. Nothing was out of place.
Kent came in the living room with two glasses of that sweet nectar also known as Mountain Dew. I couldn't drink the whole thing, I wasn't a sugar fiend anymore, but I accepted it as he held it out to me. "Thanks."
I smiled as I watched him take a seat next to me and pick up one of the many remotes that had been tucked away in a basket. He turned the TV on and then the DVR player. "I was going to watch it last night, but I didn't get around to it. But now... now it's gonna happen!" I laughed at his excitement. I only ever achieved that level of excitement these days when I was buying a new pair of shoes... or playing with my band.
"You sound like you did when you first watched the Spiderman movie. Your mom kept interrupting your scheduled movie time and it was a whole week before you got around to it, do you remember?" I took a small sip before placing it on the side table closest to me. Oh crap! I grabbed a coaster and lifted my glass, setting it carefully on top so that I wouldn't leave a mark.
"Yeah, I remember. You know Jen doesn't like scary movies? Every time she came in last night I had to cut it off." He drank half of his Dew before putting it aside as well, not bothering with a coaster. I didn't want to see Jen's reaction when she found out.
I stretched my arms overhead and then crossed them, holding myself.
"Oh, I almost forgot." Kent reached between his side of the couch and the side table and pulled out the awful yellow blanket that had been in his school-aged bedroom longer than I had. As he shook it out a pillow fell out onto the floor. He tried to shove it back between couch quickly and offered the blanket to me. "Here ya go."
I leaned forward to make sure I saw what I thought I'd seen and then leaned back, my eyebrow raised, "Have you been sleeping on the couch?"
Chapter Fifty-Eight
Kent grimaced as he picked up the Dew and took a drink.
"Yeah," he said. He took one more drink and returned it to the table by the couch. His eyes were focused on the TV. If he wanted to avoid my questioning stares that was fine by me. I'd still get my answers.
I stared at the TV too and tried to remain casual, "Because you're just so tired when you come home or...?"
"Because Jen and I haven't slept in the same bed in over a month."
I was stunned. Firstly, because it was so easy to get that information out of him and secondly, because he had been sleeping on a couch for a whole month and hadn't told me. I tried not to let my disbelief show. I busied myself by tucking the blanket around me.
"But I mean...It's a big house, why not sleep in one of the other bedrooms?"
His scent slowly surrounded my senses and I tried to resist inhaling deeply. I kept reminding myself it was because his scent was associated with so many memories, it had nothing to do with those old feelings I used to have for him.
"Because it doesn't feel right sleeping in a bed alone is all. I'd much rather crash the couch."
"It's good to know you can sleep just about anywhere...except a--"
A gangly hand popped out unexpectedly and I screamed, covering my face with the blanket. I heard him laugh at me and uncovered my face enough to glare at him.
"You scaredy cat." He casually put his arm around my shoulder and I felt my body tense. "Are you always gonna get scared at the wittle scawry movies?" He teased me as he turned his attention back to the TV.
"Um, yes...I have good survival instincts, that's all. I'll be right back."
I got up off the couch and went to the bathroom. I took the next few minutes to splash some water on my face and try to figure out why I was feeling so weird. It was Kent, he was just being Kent. He was being casual and friendly. There was nothing behind it, never would be.
I looked at myself in the mirror, pointed at my nose and whispered, "Stop being ridiculous! Stop conjuring up fiction in your silly head, Elly. Be. A. Good. Friend."
I exhaled quickly, smoothed out my dress and then left the bathroom. I was only gone for a few minutes before coming back. I pulled the blanket around myself again and stared at the TV as the zombie with the gnarly hand chased a half-naked, big-boobed girl down the street.
The movie was half over and I whispered, pulling the blanket up to my nose, "They're all gonna die..."
"You know how these movies generally work. Most of the time yes, they do." Kent covered a yawn with his fist.
"I always hope they live," I whispered again. I grabbed the blanket from my shoulders and tucked it around him. He looked so tired and so sad. My heart was hurting for him and his marriage woes. "Looks like it's getting close to your bedtime."
"I got enough to finish the movie! I'm not passing out yet, Elly. Don't forget who usually won those late night gaming sessions! It was me because you always passed out."
I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "Yeah, but you're getting old. You don't party long into the night like I do." I grinned as I tucked my hands into the crooks of my elbows and snuggled back against the couch.
"Yeah, whatever. I can run laps around you any day of the week." He chuckled and pushed part of the blanket onto me. "Just try to finish the movie without screaming again and then we'll call it a night. Alright?"
"I don't remember you being so bossy. Being your own boss must have done that to you, BossyPants." I pushed the blanket back onto him.
"I'm gonna wrap you up like a burrito if you don't accept my hospitality in my own house!"
