by Amanda Byrd
She was finally finished putting groceries in their proper homes—the huge walk-in pantry or the refrigerator and freezer—and she tore off toward the office, but not before grabbing the key. If she were still fully human, she would have been out of breath by now; luckily, she was not. Borderline frantically unlocking the door, she swung it open and laughed that evil half-laugh, half-growl she had used many playtimes before. Off he ran, through the house, into bedrooms with only one door and no other way out. This game of cat-and-mouse, or rather, werepire-and-human, went on for nearly ten minutes before even Teddy had enough and opened the back door to the fenced yard.
Walking casually to the back door, Miranda paused to kiss Teddy on the cheek, then stood in the doorway of the now open back door to the fenced-in yard. Only Miranda and Teddy could hear Norm’s screams, sounding like a cross between a pleading child and whimpering dog. He managed to run to the fence at the furthest end of the property before Miranda let out a blood-curdling howl, quickly followed by an echoing laugh that sounded fully human. She charged out the door, her werepire vision picking up even the smallest blade of grass, until she reached Norm. She grabbed him by the hair on the back of his head and pulled back so hard he feared his neck would snap. He peed his pants again and Miranda laughed harder, allowing the transformation to come, in its full terrifying glory.
“Simple human. How stupid can one man be?” she paused and said, “Rhetorical, don’t answer that.”
Opening her mouth to reveal her incisors and a few extra sharp teeth, she positioned her head so her teeth glinted in the moonlight. Norm shrieked and pleaded for his life. Miranda could not contain the tears of laughter; they rolled down her face like a waterfall. Suddenly and sharply, she bit into his throat. He made gurgling sounds, spit up blood, and some of it even managed to squirt onto Miranda, showering her from head to toe. She reveled in this. The bleating lamb during the slaughter. When she had finished her meal, she simply picked him up and hurled him over the fence with her werewolf strength, into the woods for other animals to finish off. She stripped naked on her return to the house where Teddy was waiting with a bag to transport her bloody clothes to the utility room.
Oh, that high! Oh, that satisfied hunger! Yes, yes, he was quite tasty, wasn’t he? This will be a weekly habit . . . maybe. Don’t you two numbskulls get too excited. I can’t leave a large body count, people will begin to suspect something and that’s the last thing we need. Let’s go to bed after a nice hot shower, shall we?
弇 弇 弇
The black tinted limo pulled into the driveway and up to the front door. The driver took their bags and put them in the trunk. Miranda had never before been so excited to travel. This was her first international trip in her whole life, and this country was number one on her bucket list. Partly because of its beauty, partly because of her heritage, mainly because she was about to purchase a castle and gargoyles for the now finished hand-masoned pillars at the end of the driveway. She and Teddy sat in the limo and Miranda popped a bottle of champagne.
“This is it! Finally! We are going to London!” she said as she poured two glasses of the bubbly gold stuff.
“Are you seriously going to buy the castle?”
“I sure as shit want to! Let’s see how broken down it is and go from there. Yeah, that makes sense. If it’s shit, I won’t buy it. Well, I guess that would depend on how broken down it is.”
“You do plan on living here, though, right?”
“Teddy, calm down. I’m not buying it to leave you. Where the hell would I be without you? No one can put up with human me, let alone the werepire I’ve become.”
She kissed him hard. Maybe a little too hard because when she pulled away, the left side of his bottom lip had a small blood spot on it, which Miranda quickly licked up. The ride to the airport seemed like it took hours when it only had taken about forty-five minutes to pull into the drop-off lane. The driver promptly opened Miranda’s door first, then Teddy’s, and went to the trunk to retrieve their bags. Miranda tipped the man, then her and Teddy, arm in arm, strolled into the airport.
They had little trouble checking in for their flight, making it quickly through customs and security, and headed straight for the bar. Miranda hated flying, especially with other people, so she had a few drinks to calm her stress levels a bit. Hmm, maybe I’ll buy my own plane one of these days so I don’t have to deal with this bullshit, and other people, particularly screaming children and babies . . . Hahahahaha! Miranda, you are not yet that wealthy. Oh, but I will be. Do you know how many people in this city and county need an award-winning therapist? Fair enough. Their fight would not start boarding for at least another hour, so Miranda threw back more than a few Long Island Iced Teas.
“Don’t you think seven is enough?” Teddy questioned.
“Hah! Are you kidding? It would seem my new ‘friends’ have given my metabolism enough of a boost that I could probably drink twelve and pass a blow test,” she responded, heartily laughing.
“Lucky bitch,” Teddy said jokingly, even nudging Miranda in the ribs.
Kissing him while holding a hand up to the bartender for another, she said, “I truly love you.”
Miranda kept drinking her cocktails like they were water and Teddy cut himself off after two. Someone had to be Miranda’s handler and he was the only person capable. Neither one of them knew what could or would happen if Miranda managed to get drunk and they did not care to find out. By the time the airline called for boarding, Miranda had downed about twenty Long Islands—she stopped counting, though it would have been a bit more helpful for future reference had she not. She paid the tab, tipping the bartender so generously he fainted, and she and Teddy walked arm in arm to the gate. They waited patiently in line while the attendants checked everyone’s boarding passes, allowing people to get on the plane. Miranda and Teddy finally entered the plane, where a lovely British woman greeted them and directed them to their seats. Miranda chose the window seat, regardless that she was terrified of heights and would have to use the restroom frequently considering how much she had to drink. Teddy begrudgingly took the middle seat, afraid of what behemoth he might end up squished next to, but the aisle seat was taken by a woman of Miranda’s size. Stop growling. She looks perfectly pleasant and unassuming. What’s the problem? She heard simultaneous hissing and growling. That woman is as much a monster as you, Miranda. She’s much more evil than you seem to be though. Oh? And how, pray tell, do you know this? We sense it. We feel it. We also know this is not the last time you’ll see her. There is a reason she sat here and nowhere else. Miranda suddenly felt a growing sense of dread that persisted the whole twelve-hour flight. Even when they made their half-hour stop in Atlanta, this woman seemed to always be right there when Miranda would turn around.
When they finally disembarked in London, Miranda felt something akin to relief, but also a slight twinge of apprehension, as if the voices within her may just be right. They grabbed their bags from the carousel, placed them on trolleys, and went to the exit where there were dozens of cabs waiting. They got into the closest one.
“Where to?” the portly little man asked.
“The Canary Riverside Plaza, please,” Miranda replied.
The look of shock and awe on the man’s face was priceless to Miranda. Teddy was just getting used to these things, so he simply chuckled. The drive took just over an hour. When they arrived, a bellhop came out to greet them, taking their bags from the trunk and placing them on his trolley. Teddy paid and tipped the taxi driver, who again stared in astonishment, but gratefully accepted and drove off. The bellhop followed Miranda and Teddy to the reception desk and waited while they checked in and received their room keys. The keys were not those silly electronic ones like in America, but actual keys, and they looked and felt like very old, heavy iron. Onto the elevator they went, the bellhop attempting small talk like asking what they were doing in town, were they on holiday, and suc
h. Miranda was not feeling very conversational, given she was still a little shaken about that woman from the plane. They exited and headed for their room, where the bellhop brought their bags in for them. Teddy tipped him handsomely and closed the door.
“Weren’t you just the talkative person you usually are?”
“Shut up. There was a woman . . . the monsters, err, beings, inside me didn’t like her. Said she was evil. They also said it wouldn’t be the last time I saw her. Something tells me they’re all too right in saying that and it might not be just here, either. I could have to deal with her back home, too. But for the sake of our house and cats, I’ll be damned if I let that bitch hang around too long. If it’s a fight she’s looking for, it will happen here.”
They settled into the room and decided to order from the twenty-four-hour room service. Teddy ordered a steak, well done with a baked potato and vegetables, while Miranda went for the porterhouse steak medium rare with a baked potato and chips. She loved her carbs and, knowing what she did now about her metabolism, did not care one bit about eating the foods the doctors said would cause her high cholesterol and weight gain. Teddy ate fast as it was but Miranda who ate faster—like she would never eat again, and once again managing not to choke on her food, or wear it.
“And you used to make fun of me for being a slow eater,” she joked to Teddy.
He simply shook his head and smiled, looking at her with a fondness and love she was not sure she had ever noticed in his eyes before. Or maybe she did notice and did not care. Much had transpired over the past ten years they had been together. Arguments, threats of divorce, universe travel . . . It all seemed too surreal for her to comprehend at that moment. When they had both finished their meals, they placed the cart outside but kept the glasses and bottles of red wine Miranda requested.
They finished the wine and went to bed, thoroughly exhausted from the jet lag. Somehow, Miranda found it difficult to sleep. It was not the pillows or the oh-so-comfy bed, or even the amazingly soft sheets. There was a growing thought in the back of her head that just would not allow for sleep, along with the two twits running off at the mouth. You know there’s something off about that woman. Maybe something evil. We think she may be trying to buy that castle out from under you. Oh, you do? Well, I nope that. That castle is MINE. I don’t even think it will need a whole lot of work and, honestly, I’m not sure I care. But her . . . the way she looked at me. Yeah, Miranda, you need to be careful of her. Forget that we said ‘maybe’ something evil. She IS evil. You know what has to be done about her. No, you jackasses know I do not battle unless someone is stupid enough to mess with me directly. After Xavier, I may still be a defender of the Earth, but provocation must happen first, and to my knowledge, she hasn’t provoked a damn thing yet. We sit and wait patiently. Besides, you know I’m having gargoyles shipped home. Those who know the history of true gargoyles, which mine are, will know better. If not, they will be eaten—by us or the gargoyles. I’ve even picked out names for them! King Nightmare and Emperor Bête Noir. Miranda, what’s with the French name? The literal translation is ‘black beast’, you idiot. Okay, that’s it. I’ve had enough of you two running your mouths. It’s time for sleep. Tomorrow will be a long day and so will the rest of the week because I’m going to be a goddamned tourist and enjoy this holiday. Good night.
Miranda awoke before Teddy, which was rare, but she had a hard time getting actual sleep, so here she was, naked, sitting upright leaning against a pillow between her and the headboard, blanket pulled up to cover her freezing breasts. She was thinking about what to do when the shit inevitably hit the fan with this woman. Would she eat her and leave her mutilated body out in the countryside for those who wanted to mess with her as a warning? Would she battle her to the death? Would she sick her gargoyles on her? What did this woman have at her disposal? We sense it won’t take long for you to figure that much out. Which? What she has at her disposal. Oh. Well, that’s comforting, I think. She got out of bed and decided to make a pot of coffee. She needed to wake up and that bean juice was all she had to activate her senses, as she was not about to attempt getting blood packs through customs. She would find a way to get blood, and soon, even if that meant feeding on Teddy a little. She licked her lips at the thought of human blood and even began to drool a bit. Stop that! You can’t do that without his permission! She continued making the coffee. The pot was small, so she called room service to request more coffee packets. Then she called the front desk and requested that housekeeping leave at least four more packets each time they came in, which was twice daily.
The coffee had finished brewing and she poured herself and Teddy each a cup. She woke Teddy from what looked like a peaceful slumber saying, “Coffee’s ready. Up an at ‘em. We’ve got an appointment in two hours for the castle.”
Teddy shook his head a bit, harder than he probably should have, and almost fell out of bed. Steadying himself, he gratefully took the cup from Miranda and sipped. The bean juice was quite tasty indeed. They discussed trying to find it for purchase and have it shipped home, then about their trip to the castle. Miranda filled him in on her, and her monster’s thoughts, about the woman from the plane. The shock on his face said all Miranda needed to know. She knew him well enough to know that there were so many questions floating through his head about how they knew this woman was dangerous, why they thought she would follow them back to Tampa—his brain ran the full gamut of questions until Miranda had one simple answer for him.
“Monsters sense other monsters,” and she sipped her coffee some more before standing up from the bed to start getting ready for their day of adoring the English countryside, buying a castle and gargoyles, and finding some slaughter animal for her to feed on.
Seven
Not realizing how cold it was, Teddy was not prepared for needing a coat. Miranda thought it funny no to let him know before they left home and just giggled when he said he wanted to go buy a coat. She had come prepared with her gray wool pea coat. The guy who does not get cold easily, the guy who says forty degrees Fahrenheit is comfortable, is suddenly cold. Then Miranda noticed the snowflakes.
“SHIT! This is not cool. Totally not cool. I hate snow. I should’ve known better. It’s four degrees Celsius here, which is a smidge above freezing and there’s goddamned snowflakes! Here I was hoping for slightly warmer temperatures and rain, but snow? SCREW SNOW!”
Teddy burst out into hysterical laughter. He knew how much Miranda hated snow and only ever wanted to see it in photos from her patio while sipping a cocktail looking out over the pool, surrounded by palm trees. This was one of the many reasons she chose Tampa all those years ago. He also knew how much Miranda wanted the full London experience: the dreary rain, the cold, the culture. She could learn a lot here, and would, he knew. Miranda’s tirade about snow interrupted his thoughts and he simply shook his head and laughed harder. This did nothing to calm Miranda down. But she let it go and decided to pick up a cool looking beanie while Teddy was coat shopping. The beanie she picked out was hand-knitted red with black chevron—marveling at the talent it took to make such a thing—and a black and red ball at the top, complete with ear flaps, in true beanie fashion. They each wore their new garments out of the store, given how cold it was. Though, in truth, it was not truly all that cold. Four degrees Celsius is the rough equivalent of forty degrees Fahrenheit. Miranda froze at any temperature below seventy, though, so she was still shivering and her teeth chattering. Many years of temperatures about eighty-seven with high humidity would do make anyone freeze like this. Stop being such a wuss, Miranda! This feels great to us! Besides, you can always- Don’t you dare suggest I allow either of you out in public during the day in any country! That shit will get us all killed!
Given they had chosen to rent a car from the hotel, they got in the rented Mini and headed off for the castle. I could get used to driving on the left side of the road. Hell, maybe I’ll make more frequent returns than I originall
y expected. The roads were not treacherous or dangerous, even with the barely-there coating of snow. They did, however, twist and turn, go up small mountains and down again. Miranda truly enjoyed the drive. Within about thirty minutes or so, the castle loomed in the distance. Excitement growing inside her to the point of bursting, Miranda sped up to more than dangerous speeds. She could not wait to see what awaited her and it did not take much longer for them to pull into the driveway and up the hill to where the castle stood.
Miranda and Teddy exited the Mini and stood in awe. The castle was covered in moss and showed an abundant amount of crumbling. The realtor was waiting for them just inside the main entrance to the castle and Miranda rushed to greet her. She stopped short—about ten feet from the entrance. It was her! The woman from the plane. Oh shit. Yeah, that’s about what I was thinking. How did none of us feel her presence? Shit, shit, shit. This can’t be good. At least now I know she’s not here to buy MY castle. Regaining her composure, Miranda walked a little slower to the door. She shook the woman’s hand and introduced herself.
“Hi! I’m Dr. Miranda van Wolfe. This is my husband, Teddy. Thank you for holding this beautiful castle until we were able to make the trip!”
With a handshake as strong as Miranda’s, the woman replied, “I am Elisonde. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”
Elisonde was a woman appearing to be around Miranda’s own age, taller than Miranda, standing five foot nine and slender. She had exceptionally long black hair that ran all the way down her back, past her butt, and pulled back into a low ponytail. The only notable thing about Elisonde’s features, aside from her hair, were her deep red eyes. Not a simple maroon color, no, they were somehow darker than that. She wore dress slacks, black pumps, and a knee-length dark gray wool pea coat.
