Oh. My. God.
The railing. Jace grabbing me. The pizza, the fish tank. And then I remember saying all of those dirty things into his ear. At that point I wasn’t even drunk, my one reliable excuse. There is absolutely no way that I can face Jace now. No, I am never leaving this bed. The ship’s crew will have to drag my mummified body out of this room.
The covers are suddenly pulled back, and I squeak in protest. Jace grins down at me, green eyes flashing. "Too bad," he says.
"Too bad?"
"I thought maybe you slept naked." He's teasing, but before I can summon a retort he heads for the bathroom. "Hurry up, or we'll miss the excursion."
He’s not making any sense, so I grab the covers and drag them up to my chin. The bed next to mine, where Parker slept, is empty, rumpled.
“Where’s Parker?” I call out.
“She was gone when I got back this morning,” Jace says. I hear him turn on the sink.
I didn’t even wake when she left. Then again, though she’d been sleeping soundly almost from the moment her red curls hit the pillow, I'd had more trouble getting to sleep. After tucking her under the top blanket and slipping into my PJs, I’d lain on my bed in the darkness and stared at the ceiling. My body ached with all the things Jace wasn't doing to it, things I'd really, really wanted. Finally to get some peace I'd given myself some relief, imagining Jace all the while. Afterward, I'd had incredibly hot dreams of him, dreams that make my face burn now.
I have to get myself together, play this cool. What happened last night was an aberration. It was New Year's Eve, after all. Jace and I may have shared a moment, but it’s over. Back to real life. Right? My stomach clenches at the thought, but I sit up in bed and wipe the sleep from my eyes.
“So where’d you wind up sleeping?” I ask in what is hopefully a casual tone as Jace emerges from the bathroom. He's wearing cargo shorts and no shirt, and my mouth waters at the sight of his tanned abs. I force myself to focus on the wall behind him.
“On Hunter’s couch.” Jace stoops to dig around in his bag, coming up with a royal blue t-shirt emblazoned with the words Baxter University. He turns and studies me as he yanks it over his head. "Is that awkward?"
I look away. Yeah, it’s awkward that he slept on my ex-boyfriend’s couch, but it was probably the only spot available last night. Then I wonder if Jace is worried about that so-called ‘guy code,’ about not dating—or whatever—a frat brother’s ex.
I try to sound breezy. "It's fine. No problem.”
Jace stands there a moment, and I can feel his gaze upon me. Then he takes a step toward my bed and sinks down onto the mattress. Startled, I meet his eyes to find them searching my own. I look down because, as cheesy as it sounds, it feels like he’s staring into the very depths of me.
"Last night you finally stopped hiding from me, at least a little," Jace says quietly. "Don’t start up again, okay?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean you don't have to lie to me. Not even about the little things. Especially not the little things."
"I'm not."
He crosses his arms. "You're telling me it's not weird that after we nearly hooked up, I had to crash in your ex-boyfriend's room?"
"Fine. It is awkward." I dare a glance upward. “Happy now?”
“Very.” He grins. "See? That wasn't so hard." He hops off the bed and grabs his backpack. “Get dressed. We’re docked in Progreso, and the shore excursions are leaving soon.”
I shake my head. “I’m going to tell Yasmin I caught a stomach bug and am too sick to go out.” It does feel nice not to have to hide the truth from someone. I peek a shy smile up at him. “Cover for me?”
“Nope. You’re coming with me.”
“Jace, I can’t.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m broke, remember?” I say, embarrassed.
Jace only smiles more widely. “No worries. I bought you an excursion. And Elise gave us a discount.”
My protest is sidelined by surprise. “You know Elise?”
“How do you think I found you last night?”
Oh. “You can’t buy me an excursion.”
“Of course, I can. It’s my money.”
“I can’t accept it,” I say.
“Why not?”
“Because … people will think we’re dating.” There, that should scare him off. Jace, the no-strings guy, wouldn’t want that kind of rumor floating about.
But he shrugs. "I don't really care what people think."
I stare at the latest towel animal perched on our dresser. This one is a seal. “I’m not really up for the beach today, okay?”
“Good, because we’re not going to the beach. I signed us up for the Mayan ruin hike.”
I blink at him. Hiking? Seriously? Yes, that sounds more interesting than sipping mai tais with Hunter and Kelsey, but exercise has been on my can’t-do list ever since my stomach started rebelling against most solid foods. “Thanks, but no thanks.”
“How about this,” Jace says, leaning one arm against the door. “If you can tell me what my part-time job is, you won’t have to go with me.”
I have no idea where he works. “This is a trick, isn’t it?”
“I’ll give you three tries.”
“I don’t know.” I throw my hands up into the air. “Cashier? Waiter? Teaching assistant?”
“Wrong, wrong, and—ladies and gentlemen—wrong.” He throws me another grin. “Better get ready.”
“Why are you doing this?” I ask.
“Because everyone else is going to the beach. I need a ruin buddy. You’re it.” He grins. “Trust me, it’ll be fun. Meet you by the elevators in fifteen, okay? I’ll grab us breakfast.” Before I can protest, he leaves.
I collapse back onto bed. I should go back to sleep, but I have a sneaking suspicion that he’ll haul me onto this excursion by throwing me over his shoulder if he has to. Besides, the ruins sound interesting. I’d love to see if they had any carvings or artwork. And it’s already paid for. But spending all day with him … I can’t look at him without remembering what I said in his ear last night.
Then again, if I stay on the ship, I’ll have nothing to do but think about what’s waiting for me back home. The emails. The deadline. The money I don’t have to pay him. My stomach hurts already, so I take deep breaths to steady it, then get up.
I grab a quick shower, then towel off my hair and toss on a black tank top and a pair of shorts. I slip some cash and my room key into my bra and grab my sunglasses. Maybe a hike over ruins with Jace is just the distraction I need.
Throwing open the door, I find Jace devouring a breakfast sandwich by the elevator, his backpack resting by his feet. I walk over, determined not to think about money and blackmail today.
“Thanks,” I say, glancing at Jace shyly. “This is really nice of you.”
“No problem. I’m glad you’re coming,” he says, finishing off the sandwich in one big bite. “Besides, you owe me for last night.”
“Owe you?”
“You know, for keeping you company on New Year’s Eve instead of partying with everyone else.”
I stiffen, hurt despite myself. My cheeks burn. “You didn't have to do that.” I start to turn away, but Jace catches my hand and brings it deliberately to his lips.
"It was a major hardship," he says seriously, so seriously that I meet his eyes and relax. He's teasing, and I'm an idiot. He kisses my hand, and heat spikes all the way to my stomach, and lower. "Now eat up. I got you some breakfast too.” Without releasing my hand, he stoops down to take out another foil-wrapped sandwich from his backpack. I can smell the cheese and bacon when he places it in my palm.
My stomach rumbles, but I don’t unwrap the foil. “Thanks, but maybe a little later?”
I try to give it back to him, but Jace won't let me.
“Come on, Georgie. Try?” His thumb strokes the delicate skin of my wrist, just like last night, and something in my stomach clenches—but this time, it�
��s with anticipation.
Despite the voice inside whispering that I can’t let him get too close, I want Jace. Badly. I cover by tossing him a threatening glance as I punch the elevator button.
“If I have to throw up later,” I say, “I’m aiming for your shoes.”
Chapter 14
Georgia
We’re on the bus to the ruins when the excursion guide, a forty-something-year-old woman wearing a safari hat and a happy smile, mentions sunscreen. “Make sure to cover up really well, folks!” she says cheerily. “And drink plenty of water. The sun can get pretty fierce out here, and there’s very little shade. Trust me, I’ve learned from experience!”
Next to Jace, I sigh. “Awesome. I can’t wait to look like a lobster.”
“What? Little Miss Prepared forgot to bring her sunscreen?”
“Like it’s my fault,” I snort. “You rushed me out of the room so fast this morning!”
“You’re lucky I brought some with me,” he says, and pulls a bottle out of his backpack. He squirts some into my hands, and I rub the lotion onto my arms and chest and legs. But how am I going to do my back? I’m too embarrassed to ask Jace, but when I glance at him I can already tell by his grin that I don’t even need to. He motions for me to turn around so I nervously angle myself toward the bus window. Cool sunscreen oozes onto the nape of neck, and Jace’s hands smooth it over my upper back and shoulders. I close my eyes, awash with sensation. I want those hands all over me.
God, Georgia, what’s wrong with you? I was never like this with Hunter. His touch was great, but it never sent heat spiraling over my skin and across my stomach. Not like this.
“There you go,” Jace murmurs into my ear.
I shiver with pleasure, then hastily get a hold of myself and turn back toward him. But Jace isn’t done, because his palm cradles another dollop of sunscreen.
“Hold still,” he says. Swiping sunscreen with his fingers, he dabs it on my face and smooths it in. First my cheeks, then my forehead. His touch is so gentle, the look on his face so intent, and all I want to do is grab him and kiss him. I realize I haven’t felt this way in a really long time. Haven’t felt this … cared for. Maybe that thought would make a feminist-studies class cringe, but I can’t deny that I like the feeling.
Jace finishes my nose, ears, chin, then swipes the barest trace of sunscreen slowly across my lips with his thumb. His eyes catch mine, and suddenly I can’t breathe, can’t focus on anything but his touch. Our faces are only inches apart. If I lean in a little more …
“We’re here!” the tour guide crows, standing up. The bus lurches to a halt, and the moment fades as we collect our things and traipse off the bus. The guide hands out pamphlets for a self-guided walking tour and reminds us to meet at the bus in exactly two hours before she lets us loose to explore.
The whole group of us, about forty people total, fan over the site. Now that we’ve left the comfortable air-conditioned bus behind, I shove on my sunglasses. Before ten minutes passes a sheen of sweat forms over my neck, making me grateful I remembered to put on deodorant this morning. My hair is starting to frizz, but Jace doesn’t seem to notice; he’s enthralled by the ruins.
So am I, honestly. Something about how ancient they are makes me realize how small my problems and I are in the grand scheme of things, forces me to realize that long ago, people with their own problems lived and died here.
The ruins were built in a grid-like pattern, laid out with a big open area in the middle. Each structure is roughly pyramidal, though you can walk around each of the levels, and some are tall enough to have rooms inside. They’re bigger than I’d expected and made completely from stone. I’m struck by how much work it must have taken to build them, in an age without bulldozers and machinery.
“What do you think?” Jace asks after snapping a picture of me at the apex of one.
“I think they’re beautiful.” I feel silly as soon as I say it, because the ruins are made of rough rock, without any art or markings. But whenever I let my fingers trace the weather-beaten stones, I can’t help but think that they’re sort of an art in and of themselves.
“These heaps of stone?” Jace teases.
I give him a half-smile. “They transport me to another time, take me outside of myself.” To me, that is what art does. I take in a deep breath, letting the humid air sink into my lungs.
“Yeah, same here,” Jace says. I glance at him to see if he’s making fun of me, but he only snaps another picture of the ruins, his expression peaceful and open. “You know, this is my first time outside the country.”
“Really?”
“How about you?”
I tell him how I’ve been to London with my family, once, and to a resort in the Bahamas.
“Sounds pretty swanky,” he says.
“We had to go to the Bahamas. It was a family reunion,” I explain, remembering that he knows about my family’s money problems. It feels so strange not having to hide that from him. “We couldn’t skip, or people would talk with a capital T. My dad’s family is kind of that way.”
“We can’t have Talk, now can we?” Jace says dryly. I go quiet, because he makes it sound silly to care about what people might say. But in my family, we do. I recall Elise telling me that my parents’ money problems weren’t mine to handle. I was woozy then, but I remember what she said. And she’s got a point. My parents spending habits aren’t something I can change, and whether they lose the house or not, it’s not under my control.
I wish I’d figured that out sooner. If I had, I wouldn’t have let them talk me into that scam two years ago, and therefore wouldn’t be getting blackmailed for it now.
Jace and I trek across the big open grassy space to another of the structures. Step pyramids, as our brochure calls them. My tank grows damp as the sun beats down hard on us, but I don’t mind the heat. I can’t even remember the last time I hiked, but I love the crisp scent of the grass under my boots and the faint call of birds in the distance. I feel free. Alive.
“I never asked you what you are going to do after graduation,” I say as we approach the farthest step-pyramid in the grid. Jace glances over, then spreads his arms out at the ruins and grins.
“This,” he says.
“Hike ruins?”
“Travel. I’ve saved enough from my job to go backpacking though Europe for most of the summer.”
“Seriously? That’s amazing,” I sigh. “I wish I could do that.”
“Why can’t you?”
“You never told me what your part-time job is, either,” I say, sidestepping the question, but Jace slides his sunglasses down to give me a penetrating look.
“Changing the subject?” he says. There’s no teasing in his voice now. “Come on. Tell me … something. Something real.”
“Real?”
“I haven’t forgotten about our conversation last night.”
“Which part?” I ask, then wish I hadn’t, because I’m certain my cheeks are blazing red, and not from the sun. I asked him to take my panties off with my teeth. And he totally would have.
“Any part.” From how husky Jace’s voice has gotten, he must be thinking the exact same thing. He clears his throat and nudges me. “The part about what’s been bothering you.”
I can’t hide from him. And honestly, I don’t really want to. I can’t tell him the whole truth, obviously, but I want to give him something. Share something. I’ve kept so much bottled up for so long, though, that I don’t even know where to start.
“I haven’t told my parents that Hunter and I broke up,” I finally offer.
That shocks him. “Seriously? Hasn’t it been, like, weeks?”
“I know.” It’s embarrassing, but also oddly freeing to admit. Not telling my parents isn’t going to solve any of my problems, and I know I’m an idiot for prolonging the lie. I wait for Jace to tell me that. Maybe I need to hear it.
“Why haven’t you told them?” he asks instead.
“Just haven’t had
the guts, I guess.” I start to climb the big steps up the face of the ruin to the top. “They thought we were going to get engaged, and my mom was really excited, and … I don’t want to disappoint them.” That sounds so stupid, doesn’t it? It’s not like I would be able to keep it a secret forever. Jace must think I’m the biggest fool on the hemisphere. I certainly do.
“Plus …” I trail off as my stomach turns.
“Plus what?” Jace says, but I shake my head.
“I’m going to throw up if I talk about it anymore.”
“Come with me,” he says, and I breathe a sigh of relief that he’s letting me off the hook. Jace leads me down the other side of the ruin, on the outside of the grid, where green grass spreads out before us once we reach the bottom of the pyramid. No one else is around, and Jace gestures to the ground. “There. Now if you hurl, it doesn’t matter. So talk.”
I give him a startled look, which he returns with a raised brow.
“You’ve got all these walls up,” he says, “and only you can take them down. Will you try?”
I guess he wasn’t letting me off the hook after all, and I draw in a sharp breath. The sun blazes hot against my skin, and part of me wants to run around the base of the pyramid and escape, keep my family’s secrets to myself. But I’ve been locking them away for so long that I’m exhausted.
Running a nervous hand through my hair, I sit down on the bottom stone step and clutch my hands together. Jace settles next to me, close enough that our knees touch.
And I start talking. I tell Jace all about my spendy family, the mounting debts. How Hunter was going to be our way out. I don’t tell him about the real problem, about what I did two years ago and how I’m paying for it now, because I just can’t. Explaining money problems is one thing; admitting a crime is another entirely. But I tell Jace how happy my parents were when Hunter hinted he was going to propose, and how his family’s money was going to save us, keep us afloat. He was going to be our life raft.
It feels good to tell Jace at least part of the truth, like letting air out from an over pressurized balloon. When I’m done, however, Jace looks at me so inscrutably that my throat tightens. The silence makes me press my nails so hard into my hands that they start to sting.
Full Steam Ahead Page 10
