Mastering Darkness

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Mastering Darkness Page 5

by Kate Wendley


  The indecision that night was nearly unbearable, but in the end, she left. It was the always hidden pictures of her parents that she’d stolen from uncle Roland’s room that made the decision for her. The smiling faces of those strangers instilled a brief, but powerful fantasy that she could have a happy life someday. But not with her current family.

  That fantasy got her through the night. It gave her the strength she needed to leave town, then leave the state, then keep going until she reached Atlanta. Why she chose Atlanta, she wasn’t sure. Well, actually, she’d done a report on Atlanta for school in the ninth grade. Something about all the trees in the city and it being considered the ‘City in the Forest’. She didn’t remember the specifics, just that all the greenery seemed so beautiful. So magical, and dark and mysterious. It was a place she could easily hide from her uncle.

  As far as she knew, he’d never come looking for her. And now, years later, she recognized his abuse and the toxic environment she grew up in for what it was, but the anxiety was still there. The feeling that she’d done something wrong and that she was simply unlovable on a deep, base level just never went away. The feeling that something was fundamentally wrong with her was simply too strong to shake, and it made her feel like a fraud.

  And alone.

  Yeah, she wasn’t really the strong, capable woman people gave her credit for being, but she was good at pretending.

  She stopped grinding her teeth, took some deep breaths, and quit thinking about that life. That was a different person’s life, not her life. Not anymore. A new name, a college education and a good job really did change a lot of things for her. Just not everything.

  Her thoughts wandered back to Anthony. Was their connection last night only about the physical chemistry between them? She didn’t think so, but she wanted to learn more about him. A lot more. She needed to get him talking, and maybe even relax. He’d definitely been wound up last night. She felt it in his tense, hard muscles. In his penetrating gaze… those dark eyes just sucked her in and put her under his spell. His features were sharp, and he had a fearsome scowl, but when he was being nice… he was beautiful. Scarred, pale, and beautiful.

  She just hoped she was reading him right. Quiet guys could just be quiet guys, but they could also be psychopaths. But then, so could talkative guys. She chuckled to herself and got back to work.

  Chapter 5

  Anthony didn’t need to open his eyes to know there was a werewolf beside him. Sebastian’s familiar scent gave him away while the setting sun’s deadening effect rapidly dwindled. Anthony’s sharpening senses were quickly riveted to the sound of his friend’s steadily beating heart.

  He moved and Sebastian’s pulse quickened. It would calm down soon enough. It always did. Anthony never hurt anyone when he fed, this family of vampires and shapeshifters set up hundreds of years ago to protect and help each other, yet he still felt his fear every other night. Eight years of Sebastian being his friend, roommate, and willing blood donor didn’t seem to be enough time to calm his nerves.

  Anthony leaned over his prone body and bit into his neck, the first taste of blood clearing the fogginess from his mind. He felt more alive with every swallow, his skin tingling as stolen warmth washed through him.

  His body reacted predictably to the rich taste of blood and the feel of his power being fed by it. He thirsted for Sebastian’s life force, coming alive in every possible way as he drank. These nightly feedings were the times he was most keenly aware of what it meant to be vampire.

  He sensed the usual delayed fear a moment before Sebastian’s grip tightened and he tried to push Anthony away. Quickly ignored disappointment and indignity shot through him as he tried not to feel like the inhuman leech that he was.

  He let Sebastian go and refocused his thoughts on what his evening held for him.

  Kaia.

  **

  Anthony stared at himself in the bathroom mirror. With his hair hanging wet and snarled and the bright lights shining down on him, his face looked too harsh. His scar stood out in vivid relief against his overly pale, slightly gaunt face, and his dark hair and cold eyes didn’t help matters much.

  He let his gaze travel down his body, naked besides the towel wrapped around his waist. His thin frame seemed too thin tonight, his skin too pale. But mostly, as his gaze traveled back to his face, he had no idea how he’d attracted someone as beautiful as sassy, sweet Kaia.

  How could she want to be around someone as hideous as him? Let alone the fact that he struggled to remember some of his human emotions. And his incredible strength… he could hurt her before he even realized, or cared, that he’d done it. Never mind that he was also a cold hearted killer.

  He had no business trying to get to know her. He had no right to drag her into his world, willingly or otherwise.

  He startled when Zach spoke from the doorway.

  “Hey.”

  He flicked a look at the jaguar. Zach was a handsome man with a friendly personality and could have any woman he wanted, and sometimes did. He envied his friend that he never had a woman screaming in horror when she finally realized who and what he really was.

  And that’s what his anger and frustration tonight all boiled down to, wasn’t it?

  “Good evening.” His eyes trailed back to the sink and he felt wooden as he went through the motions of his nightly routine.

  “What’s wrong?”

  Anthony stared at the smooth white and gray marble bowl filling with water. “What do you mean?”

  “You know what I mean.”

  He took a breath, waited for the water line to rise just a little higher, then turned the faucet off. He looked at Zach and said, “I don’t think this is a good idea. She−”

  “Bullshit. It’s a great idea.”

  “But−”

  “But nothing. The girl likes you, and frankly, you need this and you know it.”

  It didn’t matter that he needed this. Kaia didn’t need him. Not if she wanted to continue to enjoy her happy, carefree, oblivious life that she had now.

  He turned back to the mirror and began shaving. He put creamy foam on his face, then carefully guided the razor around the uneven ripples of his scar where it fanned out on his lower cheek.

  Zach stood in the doorway while he shaved, and when he was nearly finished, he asked, “Are you going to meet her tonight?”

  His heart started to thump. He guiltily wanted to, but he wasn’t sure he should put himself through the torture of feeling again. Not all emotions were happy ones. It would be much easier to leave them buried and forget all about Kaia.

  “What’s wrong?”

  He took his time finishing his shaving ritual before answering. He splashed his face with water, then drained and rinsed the sink out. Zach, unfortunately, patiently waited until Anthony couldn’t ignore him anymore.

  He finally sighed and said, “No matter if I need this, I’m still not fully myself. And… dating human women never turns out well for me. This is most likely an exercise in futility.”

  “What happens when you date human women?”

  He frowned at Zach’s obvious unspoken fear that Anthony might physically hurt them, or worse. “They end up seeing my true face and everything else vampire about myself. Then I have to wipe their minds clean of memories of me and never see them again.”

  “Your true face? What are you talking about?”

  He tensed as he said, “I’ve never dated a human woman without wearing my… mask.” Saying that out loud was humiliating. It was something his father had always encouraged, though. Even he knew Anthony was never going to have a woman in his life looking the way he did.

  “Your mask?”

  Anthony faced Zach and used his power to flash his full mask for him. It was a mind trick to completely cover his scar, make the sharp angles on his face seem softer, and overall made him actually seem attractive.

  Zach’s eyes widened in surprise. “So Kaia hasn’t seen your mask. You can be yourself with her. W
hy is that bad?”

  His words made sense, but Anthony’s heart still beat too harshly.

  Zach took a half step closer and carefully asked, “What is it, dude? What’s really bugging you?”

  “She’s very beautiful… and I am rather not.”

  Zach frowned at him. Deeply. “You said she was flirting with you last night. No matter what you think of yourself, she obviously thinks differently.”

  His heart raced. “I just… What if…”

  Zach waited expectantly, but Anthony didn’t know what to say that didn’t sound childish. He was afraid. He was hundreds of years old, yet he’d never done this for real before with a human woman. He’d always had his mask to hide behind. Now… this time he’d just be himself, and it terrified him because he didn’t want to screw up with her. Not with Kaia. But this was also too much emotion, too fast, and it wasn’t good for someone as powerful as him to not have control over every little bit of himself.

  “Sometimes you really surprise me, you know that? There are women here who are attracted to you. You just don’t see them, or don’t want to see them, or don’t want them for some pretty good reasons. This woman is new to you and outside our world, and you obviously like her and it sounds like she likes you. From what you told me and Sebastian, you two are totally attracted to each other, physically and otherwise. Now, I don’t claim to be an expert on relationships, but damn dude. What else can you ask for? Go get to know her!” He chuckled and Anthony couldn’t help but smile.

  Before leaving, Zach smirked and said, “Also dude, never put that mask on again. For real.”

  Chapter 6

  Kaia couldn’t believe she hit a traffic jam on her way to her date with Anthony. Ugh. By the time she finally got close to the Botanical Garden, she started to relax. She still had a few minutes, and this was a beautiful neighborhood. Ivy and other greenery looked like it had grown up right alongside these beautiful brick homes. They were charming and cozy, and she could imagine herself living with her dream guy in one of these someday… if she won the lottery. So, barring that, she’d stay in her apartment for now.

  She checked her directions again to make sure she knew where she was going, found a parking spot along the street, then grabbed her sweater and purse and hightailed it to their meeting spot.

  Man she hoped he showed up tonight instead of ditching her. She’d made a fool of herself last night, she was sure of it. He probably thought she was an overanxious freak.

  It was a little warm on her walk to the entrance, but the sun had set and with the recent cold snap, she knew it’d cool off soon. Still, she’d wanted to look pretty for Anthony tonight, so she wore one of her favorite sleeveless summer dresses. It was dark blue, his favorite color, and had little flowers along the bottom edge. She’d left her long hair down mostly because she didn’t want to fuss with it and end up being late.

  The walking trail through the park became more and more enveloped in a canopy of trees, but there were lots of small lamps keeping the dark trail well lit. There were also lots of people walking, jogging, or just out with their families. Anthony had picked a nice, safe, public place for their date. So what did that say about him? Maybe that he was a normal, decent guy who wasn’t just trying to get into her panties the first chance he got. She already knew that, though, based on how he’d acted last night.

  Movement caught her eye up ahead. A man stood from his perch on a set of steep stairs, and his long, dark hair swayed in the light breeze. That had to be Anthony. He was already here. Butterflies went wild in her stomach as he got closer and she got a good look at him.

  He was as lean as she remembered him to be, with shoulders that were strong and straight across. He carried himself like he was completely confident in who he was, but didn’t give off an arrogant vibe. Just the opposite. He came across as someone who would definitely take care of what needed taking care of, and wouldn’t want to talk about it afterwards.

  Other fuzzily remembered details sharpened up as she got closer. He was as sexy and well put together as last night in his charcoal gray button down shirt and black dress pants. His movements were just as controlled, too, but tonight he had a small smile on his face as he approached. His skin was as pale and creamy as she remembered, and his scar was just as angry and large as she’d almost convinced herself she’d been imagining.

  He seemed happy to see her, and when they were close enough, his eyes flicked down her body and back up again, not lingering too long in any one spot.

  “You look beautiful this evening. More so even than last night.”

  “Thank you Anthony.” She stepped into him to give him a light hug as a greeting, but his rigid posture let her know he wasn’t into her casual affections. As she pulled back and tried to somehow salvage her embarrassment over assuming too much with him, yet again, he gave her an extremely delicate hug.

  They awkwardly released each other and she said, “You look quite handsome yourself. You’re a fan of dark colors, aren’t you?”

  A quick, confused frown came and went, but it happened so fast, she doubted she’d even seen it. Still, she felt like she was doing all the wrong things with him tonight.

  She looked down at her dress and fanned the mostly slim skirt out. “You said you liked dark blue.”

  “You wore that for me?” The look in his eyes was a bit of wonder, and a bit of disbelief.

  “Yes. And because I like it.” They locked eyes and for some reason she also blurted out, “And because I like you.”

  He cocked his head as if she’d said something interesting, and a small smile graced those kissable lips again. She caught herself staring at them a little too long…

  He held his arm out and said, “Shall we?”

  As they made their way arm in arm up the steep brick stairs towards the Botanicals Gardens, he said, “Do you work at Lyon Industries?”

  “Yes. How did you know?” Was he stalking her? So quickly?

  “You said you work for a local company with a textile division. The only local company that has a textile division and doesn’t specialize in just textiles is Lyon. The others in town with multiple divisions are national companies, not local, so I assumed that was the one.”

  Huh. He really paid attention last night. “That’s pretty observant of you. You’re a smart guy. And what’s the name of the company you work for?”

  His earlier grin calmed. “There are a number of business entities set up, but a common one for much of my management and investment needs is The Foster Group.”

  “I’ve never heard of it, but if it has to do with residential real estate, that’s not my area of expertise. You said you manage or invest in apartments, right?”

  “Yes. Both and more.”

  He seemed disinterested in this subject, and then got distracted as he paid their way to get inside.

  Once past the main gate, they wandered around the carefully manicured trails. Lush greenery and clever, artful lighting decorated the gardens in a completely magical way. Dense trees towered above and all around them, effectively muffling the sounds of city life nearby as well as the voices of others in the gardens with them. She couldn’t have dreamed of a cozier, more romantic place for a first date.

  She desperately wanted to keep Anthony talking so she could get to know him better, but for a time she was too distracted by the gorgeous surroundings they were in. He seemed content to wander with her for now, and when she squeezed his arm and pointed out a display that was set to look like fairies flittering about a beautifully flowering yellow hibiscus bush, he just smiled at her silly excitement with a look of peace on his face.

  When she felt like she’d taken in enough awe of her surroundings, she realized she wasn’t just casually holding Anthony’s forearm anymore, she was cuddled up to him like they were already intimate with each other.

  Her hand was wrapped around his bicep, and her breasts were pressed against his arm. His hard, hard body made wicked thoughts go through her mind, but more impo
rtantly, he hadn’t tensed and pulled away like he had last night, and even earlier tonight, which meant he must be getting more comfortable with her. Of course, now that she’d noticed all that, she wasn’t sure what to do. He was still an extremely intense guy with a personality she hadn’t quite figured out yet.

  As they kept walking, she loosened her grip and made sure she wasn’t completely smashed against his sexy body. She wanted to get to know him, not get distracted by how great she knew they’d feel wrapped up in each other’s arms. “What’s your last name?”

  “Foster. And yours?”

  “McKay. Wait. So the company you work for is yours?”

  “Yes and no. It’s set up to oversee a private family, but the company is in my name.”

  His frown and sudden tense muscles let her know he really didn’t want to talk about work, so she went back to her original line of questioning.

  “Do you have a middle name?”

  He smirked and she felt his arm relax. Bingo. No work talk. Check.

  With a sexy inflection in his voice, he said, “So many questions.”

  “I want to get to know you.”

  They locked eyes and the world narrowed down for a moment to just her and Anthony. But all too soon there was movement beside them as another couple passed by, and the magical moment was over.

  He awkwardly broke eye contact and they continued exploring the park.

  “My middle name is Dashiell.”

  With her hand wrapped around his arm again, she lightly caressed Anthony’s strong bicep while they walked, which he didn’t seem to mind. Not that he reacted in any way whatsoever.

  “Dashiell. I’ve never heard that name before. I like it. It’s unique. Like you.” She gave his arm a little squeeze, coaxing a smile out of him.

 

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