“Oh yeah! Like Dan?” Gregory asked.
“Yeah, and like Sensei Ødegård!”
“What like Sensei?” I asked, glancing into the dojo for a sight of the devil.
Thomas’ eyes went wide. “Sensei’s a 5th dan! That’s like 20th degree black belt or something in Karate.”
Thomas’ flair for exaggeration was unparalleled.
“Yeah! If he wanted to get any better, he’d have to go train at a Ninja school in Japan like Sensei David.”
“Wow,” I said, listening intently. The mannerisms of ten year old boys were a wonder to behold. “I didn’t know they had Ninja schools in Japan.”
Gregory gave me a sad look, like he pitied my limited intelligence. “Oh yeah! They gotta!”
I smiled. “You probably have to be a Ninja to find one!”
“Well, then Sensei’s all set, right? Cause he’s a Ninja,” Thomas said.
“I bet he loves to hear you say that.”
“It’s true! He had to register with the police as a deadly weapon,” he said, his tone hushed. “Dan Hubbard just got his 1st dan, and he had to register. Now, if he gets into a fight, he can go to jail because his fists are deadly weapons.”
“Even his feet are deadly weapons,” Gregory added.
Thomas shook his head. “Yeah, the police want to know, you know. Which stinks, because now the police know who the Ninjas are.”
“Well that defeats the whole purpose, doesn’t it?” I asked.
The two boys stiffened, their posture impeccable.
“You boys ready?”
I should have known by the towering shadow across the floor, but Stellan still managed to surprise me as he appeared behind me.
“Yes Sensei,” the two boys said in unison.
“You two do your best tonight, and I’ll consider letting you move up.”
The two boys’ eyes widened like the moon in late eclipse, and they were gone, mingling in the dojo with the older students. I turned and met Stellan’s gaze. God, he’s fucking tall.
I gestured to the girl in class. “Thought you needed me.”
He scoffed. “Grace is a baby. I needed a Wo-man!” He said, and dropped his tone to that bedroomy place, outlining an hourglass with his hands. I swatted at him.
We heard a soft voice behind me, and I turned to meet the woman whose savior I was intended to be.
I extended a hand to the older woman. “Hey there! I’m Faye.”
The woman beamed at me, twisting the tie at her waist. We shook hands, and she introduced herself as Candyce. Before we could get too familiar with one another, Stellan hollered something in Japanese, and any stragglers in the front room darted into the dojo, each stopping to bow at the door as they entered. I bowed awkwardly and followed, Candyce shuffling close behind. We lined up before Stellan. He stood a head above the rest of the class, his broad shoulders still pulling the collar of his shirt apart. Candyce nudged me to inform me that I wasn’t the only one aware of how sexy our Sensei was. I smiled. It was a relief to have her there, possibly more so for me than it was for her.
We did a warm up and by the end of it, I was cursing the day Stellan was born. I did my best to pretend I wasn’t huffing and puffing like a beached Manatee, but let’s be honest, it was pathetic. I tried to keep up with everyone. Pushups, run, sit ups, run - Ichi, ni, san, yon, go, ichi, ni, san. I was beginning to feel weightless and disconnected from the rest of my body, but I kept up, repeating each random, unintelligible phrase Stellan hollered to the class until he announced that we were to run around the room again. I sighed and turned to follow. Stellan slid in front of me.
“Hey you,” he said.
I almost ran headfirst into his chest. The sudden stop made me dizzy. “Hey.”
I attempted to go around him. My head was dense and heavy, as though someone had clamped a concrete vice just above each ear. Before I could pass him, he placed his hands on my shoulders and held me still.
“How bout you sit down for a minute, babe?”
I furrowed my brow. “What? No.”
Again I tried to pass him, the sounds of padded feet tromping past us over and over as they ran around the perimeter of the dojo. Even Candyce was keeping a relatively even pace as she passed us. Stellan swooped one of his long arms around my waist and turned me toward the benches.
“Stop it,” I said, trying to loose myself from his arm. He let me go, but gently took hold of my hands.
He hunched down to look me in the eye. “Have you eaten today?”
“No?”
“Yeah, I need you to sit down, hon.”
He pushed a little more insistently, and I waited for the runners to pass before hissing up at him. “Why are you trying to embarrass me?”
“I’m trying to avoid that. Trust me.”
I shoved his hand away again. “No, you’re singling me out.”
He laughed. “Quit being so stubborn. All the color is drained out of your face, babe. I don’t want you doing a face plant into the hardwood. Just sit down for me, okay?”
“I’m fine, Stell. Pick on Candyce or something -”
He leaned down again meeting my gaze just as my head nearly detached from my body and floated away.
“Young lady, while you’re in my dojo, I’m Sensei. What I say, goes.”
He spoke with the gentle authority of a Geriatric doctor talking to a belligerent dementia patient. I let him sit me down on the bench, given that I felt like I was riding an escalator rather than actually walking across the room. He brought me a cup of water and his voice sounded cloudy, as though I were wearing headphones without any music playing. I glanced around the room, mumbling about how weird it felt and that I couldn’t hear him.
He smiled.
I called him a dick.
“I mean, Sensei,” I said, snidely. He nudged my leg with his as he squatted down.
“Just sip slow, alright? You can jump back in when you’re ready.”
He was up, walking backwards to keep an eye on me as though I might launch into a Flash dance style calisthenics number the second he turned his back. When he was sure I wouldn’t move, he hollered to the class again to do another round of sit ups and bicycles and leg lifts and – Christ, I don’t even know what. I lost track and stared into my water. It was the only thing in the room not spinning. When Stellan finally called over to me, I glanced up and found the rest of the class suiting up with pads and boxing gloves. He waved me over to him, and I took my place next to Candyce.
Stellan approached and spoke quietly. “You look better. You good?”
I nodded. He smiled and handed me a pair of boxing gloves. Candyce had on the mitts, so I turned to her. This looked like it might be fun.
Stellan tugged me aside. “Alright, Candyce, I’m gonna put you with Daniel.”
Daniel came by in his usual sweet manner and led her off to another section of the room. I felt something padded nudge me in the side and turned to find Stellan with mitts on his own hands.
“I thought you wanted me to keep her company?”
He smiled. “I did. And you did, and I owe you dinner for that.”
“Well, I’m not actually doing anything, am I?”
He held his hands up in front of me and took his stance, gesturing for me to do the same. I obliged, glaring at him.
“You’ve been a greater help than you know.”
“And yet, now she’s off with Daniel. Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t he belong to the ‘sausage party?’”
Stellan smiled and ordered me to hit his left mitt with a right cross. I did.
“That’s the whole point. Now that she’s here, she can get comfortable with the guys so she won’t be afraid to come back. Who better than Daniel to show her that they’re all a bunch of harmless dweebs?”
I laughed and hit the mitt for the tenth time. He switched to his left and demanded ten back fists.
“You call your studen
ts dweebs? How kind of you.”
“Hey, I’m the king of the dweebs. I can say what I want. Come on, you can do better than that.”
He held both mitts out now. I was winded, but I was enjoying myself and my head was still attached. When I finished the tenth combination, he ordered me to switch legs and we started over on the other side. I caught him watching me in the midst of my punches, and I knew he was making sure my head wasn’t floating away. Embarrassment aside, his concern felt comforting. Despite my state, he didn’t make me feel weak. Well, except when he called me a pansy for not hitting harder.
I growled at him. “You suck!”
“Breathe out when you strike. Burst of air – pow! There you go!”
He set up both mitts for the combination again, and I punched through and swung back with a nice rhythm. It was satisfying, and almost relaxing to be pounding the shit out of something. I forgot to worry about the fact that I might look like a glistening pig being hosed down in the sun and just punched away, determined to hit hard enough to appease him. I breathed out on the last back hand, and nailed the mitt. His eyes went wide.
“Hell yeah! Watch out for Faye’s south paw,” he announced to the class. I felt my face flush. He ordered everyone to trade off mitts and gloves and returned his attention to me. When Stellan struck my mitted hand, there was no question he was holding back.
“And you were calling me a weakling?”
He smiled. “Never called you a weakling, babe.”
“Well, I’m calling you one.”
“It’s true.”
I scoffed as he tapped the back of his fist. I felt a little insulted, as though he didn’t think me strong enough to withstand him. It must have been apparent on my face.
“I never hit full strength in class, F-Bomb.”
“Why not?”
He shrugged. “Maintain some mystery, I suppose.”
He bobbed his eyebrows at me.
I shook my head. “No, you’re just afraid you’ll hurt me.”
He stopped punching my mitts and cocked his head to the side. It was the ‘Are you serious?’ look he gave me whenever he thought I was being ridiculous. “Does that offend you; that I don’t want to hurt you?”
“Yes, actually.”
He rolled his eyes before hollering to the class to add another ten set to the last combination. “You want me to actually hit you? Want me to rough you up a little, is that how you like it?”
I squirmed. Damn it, Stellan. Stop finding a way to make everything sexual! “No!”
He settled back into his stance and gestured for me to do the same. “Alright, I’ll hit a little harder on the last one? Will that appease you, Warrior Princess?”
“Fuck you. And yes, it will.”
He smiled.
He hit with ten lackluster left crosses, then his backhands. I held my hand at the ready, returning it quickly after each hit, growing annoyed with the weak impact. He counted them out – 5, 4, 3, 2… and then that last one hit.
Oh my god, I should learn to shut my damn mouth.
I pulled the mitt off quickly and rubbed my hand. He moved toward me, grabbing it as well. “Did I hurt you? I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s alright, I’m fine.”
My hand was burning and limp. I shook it out beside me, hoping the searing pins and needles would stop. He snatched my hand in his and began massaging his thumbs into my palm. I felt a surge of excitement at his touch. I snatched my hand away. He reached for me again, but I held my hurting hand behind my back.
“I’m ok, Stell. Just never let me convince you to do that again.”
He forced a smile, but I could see he was upset with himself. He put an arm around me, rubbing the back of my neck for a moment. I tried not to look at him. He turned to the rest of the class.
I felt pathetic. I shouldn’t have let him see that it hurt. Still let’s be honest, it really freaking hurt. To make it even worse, I could tell he’d still been holding back.
He sent us off in small groups, staff weapons on the far wall, forms at the back of the class. Daniel pulled a big blue pad from the back room and began practicing a form that included a flip and roll. I couldn’t even comprehend that he would one day be performing such a thing without that pad to catch him. Damn Ninjas.
Stellan pulled Candyce and I to the front of the room and taught us our first form, then he left to help the advanced students. We lined up to start our third run through of the form when someone made an impressed whooping sound. I turned in time to catch Stellan doing the very flip and roll move that Daniel was attempting moments earlier. Stellan didn’t need the pad. He bounded to his feet, gave a couple kicks that were high enough to have easily decapitated Andre the Giant, God rest his soul, then clapped at Daniel in encouragement, sending him off to try again. He turned toward the front of the dojo and caught me staring. He called me a ‘looky-lou’ and said I owed him another ten forms. I grumbled only for Candyce to hear, and noticed she’d been with me in the gallery of slack jawed ‘looky-lous.’
“Oh, I’m definitely coming back,” she said, fanning herself. I laughed, and we lined up again.
A few moments before class ended, the phone rang in the office. Stellan hustled by, gesturing for me to follow.
I caught a few words of the conversation – David Callahan. Stellan nodded into the phone, before winking at me. I waited patiently as he finished up.
“Hell yeah, Brutha. Glad to hear it.”
David Callahan was Stellan’s Sensei and owner of Ninpo Dojo. He’d placed Stellan in charge of the school when he left to study at that fabled Ninja school in Japan. David would be one of the highest ranked Ninjitsu Sensei’s in the country when he returned – in a year. Stellan was content to lead the pack in his absence. The students seemed content as well.
Stellan hung up and handed me a set of keys.
“Tell Daniel to lock up the gear for me, will ya?”
I nodded and turned.
“Sensei?”
The young girl, Grace, was standing in the doorway.
Stellan raised his eyebrows at her. “What do you need, dear?”
I searched the girl’s face, something about the expression familiar. She wanted to say something, but her cheeks flushed instead.
“I was looking in the bathroom -” She started.
Stellan waited patiently, his eyes soft. She froze again, and it clicked. I knew the look.
I curled my arm around her shoulders and led her back toward the bathroom. Grace was probably around thirteen or so, and held her own in class to some of the older boys. As I led her down the hall, I was sure this wasn’t her first, but perhaps it was her first time being caught unawares. I silently thanked whatever God’s she might pray to that the Ninjutsu uniforms were black.
“Here ya go, honey,” I said, pulling a box of pads out from under the sink. She visibly relaxed, snatching the box from my hands. I pulled out a box of tampons and set them by the sink, as well.
You never know what a woman prefers. You should have both.
I remembered the conversation vividly – explaining to Stellan why he needed to stock just this very thing in the girl’s bathroom. He didn’t argue, but simply swooshed his hair to the side in the drug store and walked with a limp wrist up to the counter to purchase them. We looked ridiculous – huge mulleted man buying tampons with a lisp, and me laughing to the point of oxygen deprivation.
Despite the difficulty I had going into that CVS thereafter, this moment made it all worth it. I left and found Stellan still in the office. He raised an eyebrow, but I just waved him off. He knew not to press further. A moment later Grace ran back to class. The smile had returned to her face.
I stood talking to Candyce after class. Each of the guys stopped to speak to Stellan on their way out the door. They all had to look up to meet Stellan’s gaze, but you could see reverence in their eyes. Many of them had been in classes at this school since they wer
e young and having the same trouble Stellan once had. They started out picked on kids with glasses and bad skin, and they’d grown into these well-mannered men who walked with a comfort, (I won’t say confidence, because not a one of them was cocky) that comes from knowing they could protect themselves if they needed to.
I’d heard a story years earlier about Daniel being attacked during high school – four kids decided to beat the shit out of him in front of their girlfriends for no better reason than lunch room boredom. Daniel put two of them in the hospital. As I recall, Stellan wasn’t the least bit pleased, and he hollered at him in front of class for using too much force. Still, no one bothered Daniel ever again.
Candyce waited until the rest of the class had filtered out, saying a quick thank you and goodbye to Daniel as he left. She followed Stellan into his office, and I waited patiently outside the door. I didn’t want to intrude on the conversation, but I could hear Candyce asking for a schedule and professing a desire to return. Stellan praised her for having kept up with the rest of class and said she was more than welcome. I felt a slight twinge of embarrassment, reminded of my own failings in the whole ‘keeping up’ department.
She met my gaze as she left the office. “Will you be coming Tuesday nights?”
I floundered a moment, unsure whether I should lie, or if Stellan would be requesting my presence. He stepped out from the office behind her and nodded at me, vehemently.
Guess I could tell Jackie I joined a gym.
“I should be,” I said, and Candyce smiled. She grabbed her coat, waved to the two of us, and she was gone. Stellan and I stood there alone a moment. I didn’t speak.
Stellan crossed the room toward me and put his arms around my shoulders, pulling me into his chest. I felt his chin rest on the top of my head a moment and tried not to stifle at the close contact. Despite the complete sweaty disgusting mess I was, he still smelled of soap and laundry detergent.
“You’re the best, F-bomb,” he said and released me. I couldn’t make eye contact. Illogical as it may sound, I was sure if ever anyone were to magically sprout telepathic powers it would be Stellan, and it would be right now.
“I try,” I managed to say.
Catch My Fall Page 11
