Fucking hell. That hadn’t been sex. Sex had never left me feeling like this, like everything was right with my world. Like there was absolutely nothing I could not face, as long as I had this. In her arms, I was worthy, because she made me that way.
And that was the real tragedy.
Whatever we had was only temporary, but that didn’t mean we couldn’t enjoy it while it lasted.
Chapter Nine
Reid
I woke much later to find our bodies tangled together beneath the sheets. At some point, Alyx had turned and wrapped herself around me. Her breath, deep and rhythmic, sent puffs of heated air against my neck. My semi-hard cock rested upon her lower thigh, her upper leg flung over my hip, aligning us. A slight rock of my hips and I would be right back in heaven.
I liked her like this—warm and naked in my bed, covered in my scent while her heart beat strong and steady against mine. Yeah, I was a selfish bastard, squeezing every last drop of pleasure out of her while she was at her most vulnerable.
Wanting to do it again.
I gently untangled myself when I felt myself hardening again. It was impossible not to. Fate, in its enigmatic wisdom, had decided this woman was for me. I wasn’t just talking about the mate thing, either. Even if I wasn’t a shifter, Alyx Laskaris would have gotten under my skin. She was beautiful, intelligent, caring, and spirited, and with every passing minute, she was wrapping me effortlessly around her little finger. Now that I knew what it was like to make love with her, I was officially done.
She protested my efforts to disengage with a sleepy whimper that nearly shredded the last of my questionable sanity. Reluctantly, I left the bed and slipped into the bathroom to take a quick shower.
My whole body continued to tingle. Her scent, magnified by her arousal, had soaked into my skin. Like it or not, Alyx was now a part of me, and me of her.
Sleeping with her had been a mistake, but not one I regretted. I hadn’t marked her, so I hadn’t done any permanent damage. At least, that was what I tried to tell myself. For me, there would never be another woman.
Wolves mated for life. I didn’t know if it would be the same for her, but I couldn’t honestly say I would be sorry if no man ever measured up to me in her eyes. Yeah, I guessed that made me even more of a selfish bastard, but it was what it was.
Alyx was still in the same position when I returned, looking too damn good in my bed. If I were smart, I would get dressed, go downstairs, and make something to eat while waiting for her to wake up. I had already proven I wasn’t very smart, so instead, I dropped the towel from around my hips and slid back into bed beside her.
Almost immediately, she snuggled up to me, and I felt the warmth spread, not just along the outside of my body, but on the inside, as well.
“Mmm ... you smell good,” she murmured, brushing a kiss to the curve of my neck.
I stiffened, my heart thumping double time, as my wolf leaped forward again. If she were a she-wolf, that was where she would bite me to mark me as hers. I was surprised by how much I actually wished that could happen.
“What’s wrong?” Her lids lifted, and I found myself staring into those big, beautiful eyes. “You tensed up.”
“Nothing,” I lied.
She snorted softly. My woman already knew me well enough to call my bullshit. “It’s okay, you know,” she told me.
“What is?”
She propped herself up one arm and trailed her fingers along my now-smooth jaw. I had opted for a quick shave in the shower. “This. Us.”
She was right, and she was wrong. Under normal circumstances, we were more than okay. These weren’t normal circumstances.
I said nothing. She waited for several long minutes, then exhaled heavily. I could feel the hurt my silence had caused her, but it was better this way. For both of us.
Pressing a light kiss on my jaw, she rolled away. It took everything I had not to pull her right back. My wolf howled as I watched her gorgeous, curvy body walk away and into the bathroom, picking up her clothes as she went.
I heard the shower go on. Anything I should have done was lost in the image of a wet, naked Alyx washing off my scent. Within seconds, I was slipping into the shower behind her.
She didn’t say anything as I filled my palms with shampoo and began to massage her scalp. The need to care for her was strong. I had never washed a woman’s hair before, so I was probably too rough, but she didn’t seem to mind. Nor did she seem to take offense when my cock, hard and heavy, slid back and forth over her slippery lower back. In fact, she placed both hands on the wall and went up on her toes.
When a female presents herself like that, lifting her ass in a blatant invitation, it was hard to refuse. When Alyx did it, it was impossible.
I grabbed her hips, bent my knees, and pushed right up into that wet, ready heat.
Alyx dropped her head and groaned as I fucked her with long, thorough, hard strokes. With one hand cupping her breast and tugging at her nipple, I reached around and massaged her clit with the other. In less than a minute, she was crying out my name and I was emptying deep inside her channel.
It was only after the mating fog began to dissipate that I realized what I had done.
“Alyx ...”
“No worries. I’m protected.”
Her voice was too bright. It bothered me that she wouldn’t look at me, either.
I turned her around to face me and lifted her chin. “Alyx.”
“Don’t,” she whispered.
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t pretend this is more than it is.”
“And what is it?”
“Two adults finding temporary comfort in one another.”
Her words pissed me off. It was more than that. I knew it and I was pretty sure she did, too. And yet, that was all I could allow it to be.
* * *
Alyx
Reid’s eyes narrowed at me, but I saw the truth there. He didn’t want complications any more than I did. I was a big girl. I wasn’t going to accuse him of taking advantage of me when I was vulnerable, nor was I going to expect anything more than what he had provided. Or maybe he was worried that I would turn around and try to trap him with a paternity suit. None of those things would happen.
First off, I was the one who came on to him. Second, I threw away my rose-colored glasses a long time ago. And lastly, I really was protected. I didn’t worry about diseases, either. A nice bonus of my special gift was that I couldn’t get sick.
I dressed in last night’s clothes, forced to go commando since he had shredded my undies. I had only a short walk of shame to my place, so it wasn’t a big deal.
His eyes were on me the whole time, watching, waiting. I didn’t know exactly what he was waiting for. Maybe he was waiting for me to break down again like I had earlier. There wasn’t much chance of that. Sleep and great sex had done wonders for recharging my batteries.
“Are you hungry?” he finally asked.
I was. Starving, in fact. The sooner I got out of here, the better, but I didn’t keep much in my fridge and I wasn’t ready to face Gram yet. No doubt she had heard us come in early this morning and had pieced things together. It was going to be hard to bust her triumphant bubble and tell her that Reid and I were not going to ride off into the sunset together and have our happily ever after. I would be leaving soon, and I suspected he would, too. However, we would be heading in opposite directions.
“French toast okay?” he asked. “That’s what everyone makes when it snows, right?”
I couldn’t help myself. I smiled, though inside, my heart was heavy. “French toast sounds great. Do you have a secret recipe for that, too?”
“No. Actually, I was hoping you’d do that part. I can fry up some mean bacon, though.”
He looked at me with this crooked half-grin that shot straight into my heart like a perfectly aimed arrow. I swear, if any man could breach my defenses, it would be Reid MacIntyre. Why did he have to be so freaking perfect?
“It’s a d
eal.”
We worked together, more comfortable around each other than two virtual strangers who had just had epic sex should be. That was one of the things that made this so difficult. When I was with him, I felt more than physical attraction. I felt whole. Safe. Loved.
Whoa. I needed to back the truck up and out of Fantasy Land right now. The “L” word used in any reference to Reid MacIntyre was strictly verboten.
“So,” he said when we were seated at his breakfast counter with full plates and mugs of strong coffee, “what’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like Nowhere?”
I laughed at the clichéd pickup line. “I could ask you the same.”
Something serious flashed behind the amusement. “I asked first.”
So he had. I cut off a piece of my French toast, dragged it through a pond of maple syrup, and then chewed thoughtfully. “I’d think it would be obvious. My grandmother is here, and the local hospital has a great pediatric cancer program.”
“And ...?” he prompted.
“And what?”
“Why do I think there’s more to the story than that?”
“I don’t know. Overactive imagination? Too much time on your hands?”
He grinned at me again, and something told me he saw right through my bullshit. His next words confirmed it.
“Does it have anything to do with your ability to heal?”
I froze, the fork halfway to my lips. “What?”
“You heard me.”
“Did you put a couple of shots in your coffee or something?”
“Alyx, you don’t have to pretend. Not with me.”
A pang of longing went through me. How I wished that were true, but I had learned my lesson. Baring bodies was one thing. That was what normal, healthy, mature adults did. Sharing secrets like mine? Not so much.
“I don’t know what you think I did, but—”
“Alyx,” he cut off my denial and pinned me with those green eyes. “You don’t trust me yet, I get that. If you’re not ready to tell me, fine. But don’t lie to me. It’s insulting.”
I clamped my lips shut. I wasn’t going to lie to him, not really. I had become adept at skirting the truth, though. Just as a magician uses sleight of hand to create an illusion, I did the same things with words. Misdirection and insinuation weren’t the same as lying. At least, that was how I rationalized it. For some reason, however, I didn’t want to play those games with him.
I shrugged casually, while my stomach tightened into knots. Sharing didn’t come easy for me. “I have a gift. It’s ... hereditary.”
He nodded thoughtfully, seeming neither shocked nor surprised. “An impressive gift, though it must be difficult for you.”
“Difficult?”
“There are those who would do just about anything to harness that kind of power.”
“Would you?” I asked before I could stop myself.
His eyes met mine and held them for several long seconds, ensuring my complete and undivided attention. “No.”
“Oh.” I believed him. His words were a relief, and yet, at the same time, I felt a pang of disappointment.
I told myself I didn’t want to be harnessed, not be anyone, including Reid. I almost had myself believing it, too.
One corner of his mouth lifted slightly. He was so damn sexy when he did that. “My interest in you has nothing to do with your gift.”
Heat flashed through me. I pressed my thighs together under the table, but there was nothing I could do to hide the way my nipples hardened. His gaze flicked down, and then his grin widened, telling me that he had noticed.
I shifted slightly to relieve some of the sudden ache in my core and cleared my throat. “Your turn. What are you really doing here?”
His eyes flashed then narrowed. He didn’t like the change of subject, but that was tough. If he wanted my trust, he had to show some good faith himself.
“Recovering,” he said finally, inclining his head toward his injured leg.
“Recovering from what?”
“That, I can’t tell you,” he said honestly.
My mind went to his injury and the scars I had seen, felt, and licked all over his body. My gaze flicked to the five-foot high first-aid “kit” near the door. I thought about the gadgets I had seen in his Jeep, the snowmobile on steroids, and the whole lethal aura thing he had going on. And then, I knew my earlier suspicions had been spot on. Reid MacIntyre was no ordinary soldier.
“You’re special forces?” I guessed.
He hesitated for a moment, then nodded once. “Something like that.”
I was surprised that he had admitted it. Surprised and pleased, because it showed some measure of trust. I was pretty certain he wasn’t a man who shared that information often.
“Let’s just say, you’re not the only one with special ... skills.”
As one who valued privacy, I wasn’t going to ask him to expound on that, but I couldn’t help wondering what his special “skills” were, besides being exceptional between the sheets, of course. There was something about him, something more, yet I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.
“Maybe I can help you, like you helped me.”
For a moment, I almost wished he could help me. Visions of Reid confronting Roger and threatening him to back off made me smile a little. Reid looked damn sexy in my mental image of him dressed all in black like some character out of Call of Duty.
“I appreciate the offer, but it’s nothing.”
Again, those eyes pierced through me. “I doubt that. You don’t strike me as the type to run from ‘nothing’.”
I bristled at that until I realized that running and hiding was exactly what I was doing. Hearing that hurt my pride. I had never been the type to run away from anything, but Roger ... he was different. He was rich and powerful enough to have the police reports I had filed disappear, and had proven several times I was never completely beyond his reach.
I had also never been one to ask anyone to fight my battles for me.
I shrugged, wanting to tell him something. “My former boss is having a hard time letting go.”
Reid leaned forward, his sexy playfulness evaporating. “What’s his name? And what’s he doing? Is he stalking you? Threatening you?”
Suddenly, I was angry. Angry at Reid for wanting to help, but more so at myself for allowing things to go so far.
“Why do you care?” I snapped defensively.
His full male lips thinned. “I just do. Isn’t that enough?” I got the impression he wanted to say more but was holding himself back. We both had our secrets, I guessed.
The longer he stared at me, the harder my heart pounded. The room seemed to get smaller and it was getting harder to breathe. I didn’t want to be here anymore. I wanted the safety and insulation of my loft.
“No. Thanks for breakfast.” I got up and took my dishes to the sink, hastily rinsing them. I felt Reid at my back moments before his big body engulfed mine.
“Alyx,” he whispered, “let me help you. Please.”
I didn’t know what it was about this man, but he had a way of weakening my defenses. It would be all too easy to lose my heart if I wasn’t careful. That scared the crap out of me because I knew it would be one-sided. Physically, though, we were on the same page. It would have to be enough.
I turned in his arms, reaching up on my tiptoes to grab his hair and pull his mouth down to mine. Just as I had hoped, big, powerful hands cupped my backside and lifted me onto the counter. The next thing I knew, my pants were flying across the kitchen and Reid was on his knees, his face buried between my legs.
He licked and sucked and nipped me into oblivion. I lost myself in the flood of sensation he had unleashed. That was the only excuse I had for not protesting when his finger started circling where I had never allowed another man to touch me before.
Glowing eyes looked up at me, questioning, filled with primal heat. It was as close as he had come to asking permission.
I said nothing
. My silence was my permission.
He grunted, then dove back into his task with renewed vigor. He kept sliding his fingers from front to back, spreading my slick heat until I was completely drenched down there. Then I screamed as one thick finger slipped inside. It was unlike anything I had ever felt—invasive, possessive, and way too damn good. I shattered, just shattered into pieces, right then and there.
I heard him curse, then he was pushing inside me, thrusting fast and furious, riding and extending my orgasm until I felt the telltale heat blooming deep within, right about the same time his mouth clamped down on the tender skin between my neck and shoulder.
Pain shot through me for a second before morphing into this insane white-hot pleasure that magnified my already intense climax into something beyond comprehension.
It was too much. My circuits overloaded, my body simply melted. I blacked out.
Chapter Ten
Reid
“Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!”
Alyx went limp about the same time I registered the taste of her blood in my mouth. I had done it. I had finally lost the last thread of my self-control and fucking bit her. My wolf was prancing around like a goddamn prized stallion, but my human half was fighting full-on panic mode.
I carried her to the sofa and laid her out, then ran into the bathroom to grab a towel and run it under warm water.
“I’m so sorry,” I whispered as I wiped the blood away, trying to be as gentle as I could. The wound had already healed, but my mark was very clear.
Despite the best of intentions, I had done exactly what I had vowed not to—I had marked Alyx as my mate.
Without her consent. And she had no idea what I was.
Talk about a shitstorm. What the hell was I supposed to do now? Did I just wait for her to wake up and say, “Hey, guess what? I’m a wolf-shifter and you’re my mate. Things got out of hand while you were climaxing all over my cock and I marked you, so now you’re mine.”
Or, suggested my wolf, I could just take her upstairs and keep her in my bed until she couldn’t imagine a life that didn’t include me deep inside her several times a day. Yeah, that would go over well. Especially since once my medical leave was over, I would be heading out on another mission, leaving her alone and unprotected.
Going Nowhere: A BAMF Team Novel Page 8
