by Deb Baker
I hustled back to Cora Mae and untied her, leaving the tape on her mouth until last. “Later, Cora Mae,” I said when she began flapping at me, “before she comes to. We have to tie her up with this rope.”
That shut her up good.
After trussing Diane, the two of us stumbled out of the woods just as several county sheriffs cars pulled in. Blaze got out of the passenger seat of the first one to arrive. He took one look at his damaged vehicle and read me my rights.
None of them would listen to a thing I was trying to tell them.
Cora Mae had to take over.
When that woman speaks, men listen. And these guys weren’t any different. They were doubtful, but willing to follow her into the woods.
Pretty soon two of them came back out with Cora Mae. I had to watch the whole thing from the back of a locked squad car, but the window was rolled down enough that I didn’t miss what happened next.
Chet Hanson pulled in behind the squad where I sat. He rushed up to Cora Mae, wanting to know what was going on. Then he spotted two cops escorting Diane Aho from the woods.
“She tried to kill me,” I heard Cora Mae say to him.
That fired him up but good. He stormed toward Diane. Blaze stepped in front of him, otherwise I think Chet would have attacked her.
Diane’s face looked like a bloody pulp, something right out of a horror flick. She gave him a really dirty look, and said, “Arrest that man. He killed my husband.”
After that, they started shouting accusations at each other.
As it turned out, Chet Hanson really had killed Harry Aho, along with his second cousin Frank.
*
“I can’t believe I missed the whole thing,” Kitty complained, standing on the other side of the bars in the Escanaba jail.
“You’re lucky,” Cora Mae told her, then for something like the hundredth time. “I never thought it was Chet.”
“I sort of knew,” I said, trying to save a little face. “Once we found out that Diane was sneaking over to Chet’s, it was easy to put two and two together.”
Kitty shook her head in disbelief. “At one point, I even said Chet must be the killer because Cora Mae was dating him. I was joking at the time.”
“I have the worst luck with men,” Cora Mae said.
I would have added that she was also the worst investigator I ever met, but she already felt bad enough. Not only had she been sleeping with a killer, she’d been his alibi when he murdered Frank. That woman sure could sleep.
Kitty went on, “I talked it over with Blaze.”
“He talked to you?”
“We get along. Anyway, thought Frank Hanson had killed Harry since he was on the premises at the time and had a motive, which was shutting down the rifle range. He also had a rifle in his possession, so he had means. And he had the opportunity. Then when Frank died, Blaze figured either Gus or Martin had taken their revenge. He was barking up the wrong tree all along.”
“They better not release that crazy woman on bail,” Cora Mae said.
“We’ll protect you, if they do,” Kitty said.
Diane Aho really was a nut job. She’d schemed with Chet to murder her husband. Only Diane and Chet had different motives. She thought if her husband was out of the picture, she’d finally be with Chet. But Chet, never one to back away from a full-blown feud, was just using her to get at Harry.
“Chet liked you a lot,” I said to Cora Mae when I saw tears in her eyes. “He wouldn’t have lost his temper and ended up in that big finger-pointing argument with Diane, if he didn’t care about you.”
“I know,” she sniffled.
Kitty had more, “Diane didn’t know a thing about Frank Hanson’s blackmail attempt or that Chet had murdered him. In fact, she thought one of her sons did it.”
“Would she really have killed me?” Cora Mae asked.
Kitty locked eyes with me. I gave her a tiny head shake. “Probably not,” Kitty lied.
“I don’t understand how Blaze can hold me,” I whined through the bars, “when he let you two go on your own recognizance.”
“Seeing his truck like that tipped him over the edge,” Kitty said.
“Totaled?”
“Totaled,” Kitty said.
“Can you guys get me out of here?”
Kitty shook her head. “I’ve tried. Blaze is really mad. That’s why he moved you here to Escanaba. The three of us have to go before the judge and convince him we weren’t obstructing justice, but don’t worry, I’m defending us.”
Which was the thing that had me worried the most.
*
George came to visit. He had Grandma Johnson with him.
George and I kissed through the bars.
“Tell George what you told me,” I said to Grandma. “About the sweepstakes bribe you took from Diane Aho in exchange for confirming a false alibi.”
“That’s hogwash,” she said.
“I’ve got proof,” I said, punting.
“Grandma already made a truthful statement,” George said to me. “Pearl talked her into it. Now the charges are going to be more serious. Her testimony will prove it was premeditated.”
“Did you find out why Chet killed his own cousin?” I wanted to know.
“Second cousin,” Grandma corrected me.
George said, “Frank saw Chet running from behind Harry’s house and tried to blackmail him. When Chet refused to go along with it, Frank threatened to go to the Ahos with the truth. Chet followed him that night, realized where he was headed, dressed up in a ghillie suit, and shot him before he could talk.”
“He wouldn’t have squealed on his kin,” Grandma said.
“We’ll never know now,” I said. “I just don’t understand why Chet hired me in the first place if he was going to shot Harry.”
George shrugged. “Maybe to throw suspicion off of himself.”
“A ploy,” Grandma said.
Looking back on events, I might have had a few facts wrong, and I might have misconstrued a few more. Assumptions can be tricky, and intuition is sometimes a bit flawed. But Cora Mae is alive and well. And the guilty parties are behind bars.
Being an investigator can be a thankless job. Nobody pats you on the back for a job well done. They don’t give you the credit you deserve. This time, I’m giving myself a whole lot of credit. And if others don’t appreciate it, that’s their loss.
I really wish I wasn’t behind bars, cooling my heels, waiting for court.
It gives me too much time to think.
One of those thoughts was that we weren’t going to get paid again. If I was free, I’d be out and about, drumming up business. Instead, all I could do was plot my court case.
*
Word For The Day
DITCH (dich)
A trench, usually for drainage;
To skip (class or school);
To get away from.
The judge was an anal, no-nonsense type of guy. Because of that, he and Blaze got along perfectly. It didn’t help that they knew each other and played poker together.
Even with all that going against us, my legal-eagle defense managed to cop a plea bargain. Kitty’s law classes were really paying off.
The judge found us guilty. Here’s what he said about our sentences, “Providing a service to the community is more beneficial than punishment. I could incarcerate you, but this way you might become educated in what constitutes acceptable behavior. I order each of you to perform eighty hours of community service.”
And that was the end of that.
Out in the parking lot, George gave me a big hug. Grandma Johnson clacked her false teeth and humphed. Blaze was happy with the judge’s decision.
“Hope you learned something from this,” he said to me.
I doubted it.
Cora Mae, Kitty, and I brainstormed right there on the spot, deciding to do our community service time together at a nursing home, one that caters to all kinds of different needs, including assisted living.
Maybe I can talk Grandma Johnson into going along. What if she likes it there and moves out of my house for good?
Suddenly life was filled with all kinds of interesting possibilities.
Outside the courthouse, Fred greeted me from the passenger seat of George’s truck. I got a lot of wagging tail and a face wash.
“Let’s ditch this place,” I said to my man.
THE END
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Deb Baker grew up in the Michigan Upper Peninsula with the Finns and Swedes portrayed in the Gertie Johnson mystery series. She makes her home in Wisconsin now, but visits her family “camp” as often as possible.
Books by Deb (in order):
Gertie Johnson Murder Mysteries
Murder Passes the Buck - When her neighbor is shot and killed, Gertie investigates his death, even though it’s been ruled an accident by Gertie’s son, the sheriff.
Murder Grins and Bears It - a game warden is murdered right under Little Donny’s tree stand. Little Donny disappears into the backwoods, forcing sixty-six-year-old Gertie to use her “unique” investigative techniques to find her favorite grandson.
Murder Talks Turkey - Gertie Johnson, is standing in line at the bank when it gets robbed. The robber doesn’t make it out alive, but the money is missing.
Murder Bites the Bullet – 7/2011, Gertie and the Trouble Busters get caught in the crosshairs of a long standing family feud.
Cooking Can Be Murder – 100 tasty recipes from Gertie’s kitchen
Gretchen Birch Suspense Series
Dolled Up For Murder – back in print 8/2011 - For Gretchen Birch, her mother Caroline, and her aunt Nina, doll restoration is a family affair. But they have never imagined a valuable doll could lead to murder.
Goodbye Dolly - Gretchen is at her first major doll show, praying she doesn’t botch any repair job. But glue-gun glitches turn out to be the least of her worries when a sleazy reporter is found dead with Gretchen’s craft knife stuck in his back.
Dolly Departed -Gretchen answers an invitation to a party at an unfamiliar dollhouse shop - and winds up in the thick of a murder mystery of miniature proportions.
Guise and Dolls -An anonymous donor...murder in a cemetery...a haunted house with hidden secrets. Someone's dream come true will soon prove more of a nightmare. Gretchen better solve the mystery, or it'll be her and her friends who are history.
Queen Bee Mysteries (as Hannah Reed)
Buzz Off - It's September - National Honey Month - in Moraine, Wisconsin and life seems pretty sweet for Story Fischer...until her bee mentor is found dead in his apiary. Now Story has to find her way out of a very sticky situation.
Mind Your Own Beeswax - Story Fischer has a successful local market, her Queen Bee Honey business, and a new boyfriend. Then she finds the dead body of local woman with a checkered past right near her hive and things get sticky.
Plan Bee – available 2/2012
A Sticky Situation – available 2/2013
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This book is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
Copyright © 2011 by Deb Baker. All rights reserved.
Cover Art Design: Patricia Ryan
