by Ashley Blake
“Oh my gosh Laney! What happened to you?”
I was so ashamed that my friend had to see me like this but I had to tell her what happened.
“Brian.”
“What?!” Her shriek caught me off guard.
“It’s not the first time this has happened, I just covered it up before. But today was the last straw. I broke things off with him and I never want to speak to him again.” I was balling like a baby and she put her arms around me.
“I, I just can't believe it. You guys? Brian? I'm in shock right now. Are you okay? Do I need to take you to the hospital?”
“No, I will be okay. I’m just really embarrassed that I even allowed this to happen to me. Chloe, please don’t tell my parents, I just want to go crawl into my bed.”
She started driving toward my house and I dried my tears.
“Why not?” Her eyes were concerned as she glanced at me while trying to pay attention to the road.
“I’m afraid my dad will kill him and I just don’t want them to know that I was so weak.”
“Laney, your parents love you and I think you should tell them what happened. Trust me, they will want to be there for you. I don’t think you should have to deal with this with just me as someone to talk to. I’ll go with you to tell them if you want.”
I was silent for a minute as I thought about what she said, but I decided against it. The school year was almost over and I would never have to see Brian again so I didn’t think I had to involve my parents. I couldn’t bear to see the look on my parents’ face when they learned that he had hit me before and I had stayed with him.
“Chloe, I’ll be fine, really, I don’t want them to know. It will be better for everyone if I can just put this behind me. I’ll just tell my parents that we broke up and I don’t want to talk about it. This whole thing will blow over, you’ll see.”
We pulled up to my house and I gave her a big hug.
“Thank you for coming to pick me up.”
“You’re sure you don’t want me to go inside with you?”
“No, I’ll be fine, thanks. And Chloe? Please don’t tell anyone about this.”
“I won’t, I promise, even though I think you should tell your parents.”
“I’ll be okay, really. I’ll see you at school tomorrow.”
I got out of the car and luckily my parents weren’t home from work yet so I ate a sandwich really fast, grabbed some ice for my lip, and decided to turn in early. When my parents came home I would just mumble from the bed that I broke up with Brian and I wanted to be alone. My mom would probably want to come in to make sure that I was okay, but my dad would convince her to give me space. My dad and I were really tight; I could talk to him about anything. But this, what had happened to me with Brian, I just felt so ashamed and I knew my dad would want to have him arrested. If that happened it would be all over school and Brian was so popular I was sure that everyone would hate me. I didn’t want to make things worse than they already were; I just wanted it all to go away.
That evening, when my parents came home, exactly what I thought would happen, happened. They knocked on my door and they left me alone when I told them I didn’t feel like talking. It was less than a month before prom, I was one of the most popular girls in school and I was probably going to miss it. I drifted off crying myself to sleep wishing that I had never met Brian.
The next morning I woke up to 38 texts and missed calls from Brian. I didn’t feel like dealing with seeing him that day at school so I stayed in bed, and when my mom opened my door to check on me I kept my face hidden under the covers and told her that I really needed to stay home. I was the type of student that never missed a day of school unless I was violently ill, so I knew that my mom would understand and realize that I really needed this time to myself. It also helped that it was Friday, and I wouldn’t be missing anything big at school anyway since we had less than a month of classes to go before graduation.
My parents left for work and I had the house to myself so I went to check my lip in the mirror and, thankfully, the ice helped to keep down the swelling. I grabbed a bowl of cereal and plopped down on the couch to watch t.v. and eventually drifted off to sleep. The blaring sound of my cell phone woke me from my slumber and without thinking I answered the phone.
“Laney, please don’t hang up.” Brian’s voice sounded desperate.
Fear coursed through me as the hairs stood up on the back of my neck and then anger took over.
“Brian, I told you not to ever contact me again!”
“I am so sorry, I never meant to hurt you. You have to give me another chance! I can’t live without you!” He was sobbing hysterically and I felt nothing but anger and disgust. I wanted nothing to do with him.
“Brian we are over! Don’t call me again!” I turned off my phone so that he wouldn’t be able to reach me. A minute later our house phone started ringing and I saw that it was him on the caller ID, so I unplugged it. I knew that I couldn't keep the phone unplugged forever so I was going to just tell my parents that Brian was taking the break up kind of hard and I didn’t want to deal with his constant calling. I figured if I put that kind of spin on it I wouldn’t have to tell them what really happened, and I was hoping the whole thing would just blow over and go away.
Hours passed and before I knew it, it was just about dinnertime. I loved to cook so I decided to surprise my parents with dinner that evening. I made chicken Parmesan, roasted potatoes and salad, and I set the table so that they wouldn’t have to do anything but sit down and eat.
I checked my lip in the mirror and, thankfully, you could barely tell that it was swollen the day before. I put on some lipstick to cover up the tiny cut in my lip, my makeup covered the bruising on my face, and I dished all of our plates since I knew my parents would be home at any minute. I was getting the lemonade out of the fridge when I heard my parents come in.
“What’s all this?” My mom sounded pleasantly surprised as they walked into the kitchen and saw the beautiful spread I had prepared.
"I thought I'd make dinner for you guys for once since you always make dinner for me. So you can just put your things away and then sit down and relax, and I will pour a glass of lemonade for all of us.”
My mom looked a little bit concerned as she looked at me and put her hand in my shoulder. “Laney, are you sure you’re okay? I know you probably don’t want to talk about Brian but honey, I just want to make sure that you’re okay.”
“Yeah sweetheart, you didn’t have to do all of this after what you went through with Brian yesterday.”
My eyes flew to my dad’s face. Did he know what happened?
"I know breakups can be rough sweetie, so you didn't have to do all of this, but thank you. You can just relax for the rest of the night and we will take care of everything else.”
"Mom, dad, I'm fine, really, you don't have to worry about me. It's for the best that we broke up anyway, it was getting serious and I’m going to be leaving for college in a couple of months. I just needed a day to myself, but I’m fine now and I’ll be able to go back to school on Monday. So don’t worry about me, really.” I did my best to brush it off. “Let’s not talk about this, let’s just have a nice dinner. So, how was work for you guys today?”
My parents looked at each other and they both knew me well enough to know that if I wanted to drop something then we should just drop it. We had a nice dinner and didn't talk about Brian, which made me really happy. After dinner we all watched a movie together and then turned in for the night.
The weekend flew by and Monday came before I knew it. Chloe didn’t leave my side all day because she wanted to make sure that Brian stayed away from me. I saw him in the halls but he kept his distance until the end of the day. Chloe was giving me a ride home since Brian used to always do that and as I was walking to her car to wait for her he came up behind me.
“Laney, you can’t keep pushing me away like this. Please give me another chance, I miss you and I love you. I promi
se I will never, ever hurt you again.”
I spun around and glared at him. “I have nothing to say to you, leave me alone!”
He grabbed my arm but then quickly let it go. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.” He looked desperate and I just wanted him to go away.
I looked him squarely in the eye. “Brian, you need to move on because we are never getting back together. You hit me and that is something that you can’t take back.”
Just then Chloe walked up and asked if everything was okay.
I looked at Brian, and looked at her. “Yeah, we’re done here, let’s go home.”
We walked away from Brian and he stood there watching us, not saying a word. He didn’t plead for me to give him another chance and he didn’t make a scene. It was almost eerie the way he just stood there looking at us but I shook it off and told myself that maybe it had finally gotten through to him that we were done.
The week passed uneventfully, thankfully with zero communication from Brian, and by Friday I was so ready to have fun with Chloe that weekend. We were going shopping all day Saturday and I couldn’t wait. The final bell rang and as I neared my locker I saw Jeremy standing there waiting for me. Jeremy had had a crush on me since the ninth grade but he never mustered any courage to ask me out. I remembered him as a scrawny freshman and since I had been with Brian for the past year I had never really given another guy a second look. Well Jeremy definitely deserved a second look. When did he turn into this tall, gorgeous guy? I felt my belly flutter as I walked up to him and looked into his bright blue eyes that were smiling at me.
“Hey Laney.”
“Hey Jeremy. What’s going on?”
He shuffled his feet a bit, shoved his hand into his front pocket and glanced down at the floor before he looked back up at me. I could see the apprehension in his eyes.
“Well, um, I kinda heard that you don’t have a date for prom and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me?”
Really? It never even crossed my mind that another guy would ask me to prom. I thought for sure that everyone would have a date by now. I was really flattered and there was no way I was going to say no.
I looked at him and smiled. “I would love to go with you Jeremy.”
A huge smile spread across his face, we exchanged phone numbers and he told me he would let me know all of the details the next week. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face as I got into Chloe’s waiting car.
“Somebody looks happy! What’s going on?” Chloe had an inquisitive smile on her face as she raised her eyebrows at me.
“Jeremy just asked me to prom.” I was cheesing all over the place.
"Oh my gosh! I knew it! That guy has had it bad for you since freshman year and I knew that he was just waiting for you and Brian to break up so that he could swoop in. I know for a fact that Stacy Miller was hoping he would ask her but I knew that you’re the one he really wanted to go with. You guys are going to have such a good time! He’s really nice Laney, I know you don’t know him very well but Jeremy is a really good guy, not a loser like Brian.” Then she gasped and took one hand off of the steering wheel and grabbed my arm. “Oh my gosh! We should totally double date! What do you think?”
I really liked Chloe’s boyfriend David and he was good friends with Jeremy so I knew that we would all have a lot of fun together. Jeremy was really sweet and it was nice to look forward to hanging out with a guy without worrying that I would say the wrong thing and piss him off.
"I'll ask Jeremy when I see him next week but I'm sure he'll agree to it. Oh my gosh Chloe, I am so psyched, this is going to be so fun!”
Brian was a distant thought as I looked forward to prom with my friends.
Jeremy agreed that it would be fun if we all went together so we did and we all ended up having the best time at prom. It was really nice to be with someone without having to constantly be on my toes, making sure that I didn’t say the wrong thing, or be accused of flirting with someone. There was no sign of Brian that night and I was really relieved because in the back of my mind I thought he might try to pull something. It wasn’t until about halfway through prom, when I felt sure that he wasn’t there, that I was able to relax and really have a good time. Jeremy was such a nice guy and prom ended up being one of the most fun nights that I had ever had.
Graduation came and went with no contact from Brian and I realized that I was thinking about him less and less. I was relieved that he had finally gotten the message and had stopped bothering me. Jeremy and I started dating each other after prom and about two weeks after graduation he dropped me off at home after a movie and I told him I would talk to him the next day. He gave me a quick kiss before I went inside. I said goodnight to my parents to let them know I was home safely (they always wanted me to do that no matter what time it was), and I washed my face, brushed my teeth and crawled into bed. I was so happy that I had met such a nice guy and I drifted off to sleep on cloud nine.
I woke up in the middle of the night to a hand covering my mouth as Brian’s bloodshot eyes stared daggers at me. He hovered over me and pinned me to the bed. “Do you really think that you can go to prom and parade around town with your new boyfriend and make me look like a fool? I told you that we were meant to be together Laney and I’m not going to let you go!” I could smell the alcohol on his breath as I tried to wrench myself out of his grip. “I love you can’t you see that?!”
I tried to push him off of me and was finally able to get my mouth free. “What are you doing here?” I hissed at him. “Get out of here right now!” I didn’t want to raise my voice because I didn’t want to wake my parents. I just wanted him to leave.
“I’m not leaving until you say you’ll take me back! I love you Laney, I don’t know why you can’t see that!”
I struggled beneath his weight and continued to try to push him off of me. “Brian, I told you that we were over and that you need to move on! Now get off of me and get out of here! Leave me alone, I don’t love you anymore!”
His eyes filled with pure evil and he snapped. He started slapping and punching me worse than he ever had before and I could feel blood pouring into my mouth. I screamed for my dad and I heard his feet thumping on the floor as he came running. Brian quickly jumped off of me and escaped through my window, which must have been the way that he got in. By the time my dad reached me I was bloodied and crying and I could see the shock on his face.
“Oh baby! What happened, who did this to you?!”
When he found out that it was Brian who attacked me he was beyond pissed and immediately called the police and an ambulance and they were there within minutes.
I stayed in the hospital for a couple of days with bruising and a broken rib and when I was released a detective came to see me and told me that they had arrested Brian. I was able to heal physically, but the emotional scars ran deep and I wondered if I would ever be able to live without fear.
The state of Florida has zero tolerance for domestic violence and Brian got 16 years for breaking and entering our house and attacking me. At his sentencing hearing, he looked at me and mouthed the words ‘see you in 16 years’ as an evil grin spread across his face. A chill ran down my spine and I tried to shake it off telling myself that he couldn’t get to me because he was going to be locked up for a long time.
I started seeing a therapist shortly after the attack, at the insistence of my parents, and by the time I left for college I was on the road to mental recovery. She referred me to someone in my college town and I saw them once a week. No one knew that I was in therapy and I wanted to keep it that way, I didn’t want to appear to be different from anyone else.
I went off to college, occasionally keeping in touch with Jeremy but that eventually fizzled out. Chloe and I talked once a week and even visited each other at our colleges and our friendship was stronger than ever. Brian was the thorn in my side that would not go away. I knew he was locked up but that did not stop him from torturing me.
It was some time near th
e end of my first semester freshman year that my world changed, again. I had really tried to not think about Brian and I immersed myself in the whole college thing. I studied hard, I went to parties and I even had a steady boyfriend. I tried to stay as busy as possible and eventually it was starting to work, and then I received the letter.
It was from the Corlus County Correctional Facility and a chill ran through me when I saw the return address. The letter was 22 pages long and Brian went on and on about how he couldn’t wait to see me when he got out and that when he did get out, we would finally be together. The first time I received the letter I was terrified. I talked to my therapist about it and she really helped me reclaim my strength and helped me to not let Brian have power over me. The next month when I got the letter I was angry and I decided that I would really try to not let him affect my life.
