by Lucy Lixx
Alina: The Handsome Devil
Waking up, I felt as if every muscle in my body had shards of class embedded within them. My body ached, especially in my neck. It felt like someone had hit me in the throat, and my lips felt cracked, the taste of iron crimson on my tongue. I knew I was dehydrated, and I wondered how long I was out. I had taken a few falls hiking before, and this wasn’t the first time I’ve passed out from one thing or another. Usually exhaustion from running. I did the same thing I always did. I kept my eyes closed and took a deep breath. The expansion of my chest as I tried to forcefully fill my lungs ached beyond measure. So wasn’t breathing in a normal pattern, reconciling myself to shallow soft breaths, hoping my head would stop reeling.
I felt some bruising around my hips, which I thought odd. Instinctively forcing myself to feel each extension of my body, trying to sense if there was anything else wrong, but nothing else seemed viscerally amiss, despite the ache in my muscles and throbbing within my head. Everything was still attached, but I hadn’t expected it not to be. I wasn’t in that much pain, provided I stayed still. That’s when stark fear reverberated through me. Though my physical body seemed intact, I didn’t know where the hell I was. Squeezing my eyelids tightly, bracing myself as I took in the temperature of my surrounding, I just knew without opening my eyes that I wasn’t home anymore. Motionless, I was terrified of what I’d find when my eyes opened.
Sadistic and terrifying scenarios of what might be my plight flashed through my head. The idea of being sealed alive, the idea of finding myself tied to a bed, and even the idea that perhaps it was something like horror movie, torture-like porn poured through my head. That’s when I decided it’d be easier to get it over with and open my eyes before continuing the downward spiral of ‘what if’. I opened my eyes to see a fully lit room, but it was dimly lit. There was a small lamp and light switch in the corner.
Just the one light lit the entire room comfortably without it being too bright, but even the soft illumination seemed to hurt my head. My vision was still blurred around the edges, but I got up. The sheer act of changing positions and sitting up too quickly wracked me with pain that much more. Noticing I was in nothing but a blue, cotton dress, I looked at my bare feet as a shiver sprang up my spine. I knew that I had been fully dressed before I had been taken. Taken. The word echoed through my head.
“Oh God.” I said, but it was barely a whisper.
I saw a nightstand that was obviously solid wood and in good condition. The bed I was on was a queen, and there was even a table with two chairs in the corner. On the nightstand rested a bottle of water. I reached for it before I thought about it, quickly recoiling my hand. If they wanted me dead, then I’d be dead already. I need to hydrate. I argued with myself, grabbing the water bottle and opening it. Realizing that it wasn’t open yet seemed to make me feel a little more satisfied. I drank half of the bottle greedily before my stomach protested and I had to hold it down. I put the cap on, knowing that I’d drink the rest soon.
“Where am I?” I said out loud almost hoping that someone would respond.
I didn’t get my answer at first, but it was only a few minutes before I heard footsteps echoing outside the door. I shivered, wondering if I was ready to see who would come through that door just as the handle jiggled. I heard keys, which dashed my hopes of an easy escape.
That’s when I saw him. He was older, but he was probably only in his late thirties, and he smiled at me in a charming fashion. His hair was perfectly coiffed in jet black, and he had a strong jaw line with just a hint of stubble which hinted at him having been too busy to tend to his appearance. Yeah, too busy at capturing me. I thought bitterly, trying to think of all of the reasons that I shouldn’t find this man handsome, and yet here he was. Handsome no matter if I wanted him to be or not. He wasn’t overtly muscular, but it was obvious that he probably jogged almost as much as I did, or at least did some version of calisthenics.
“Yes, I am watching you. When you expressed a question, I came. That is what I plan to do. Answer your questions for the most part.” The man said in a much softer, gentler voice than I had expected. It once again threw me.
“You are still surprised? Just know that I don’t need to be here for long. I’m about to walk out that door if you decide not to say anything, Alina.” He said, startling me. I hated that he knew my name, and yet it didn’t surprise me. It was as if I had heard him say it before, and I tried to think if I had ever seen this man before, but I often kept my head down out of habit. I wouldn’t have noticed if the man was around me. I didn’t notice most people, and that was one of my issues.
“Why?” I croaked desperately, causing him to chuckle. I could feel heat rise to my cheeks as I flushed. I detested him laughing at me. It was like adding salt to a wound. As if his apparent sick and twisted mind found joy in rendering such fear and horror.
“Why?” He mocked, “That’s such a generic question. I know you can do better than that Alina, at least ask ‘why me’.” He said, waiting.
“Why me!” I spat out flatly, gritting it out and seething in anger and hatred for the man whom stood before me.
“Because you, my dear, were easy”, he mocked. “You want to know more, Alina?”, he continued dryly. “You pay little attention to your surroundings. You were a sexual person, yet it’s obvious you aren’t a virgin, but you don’t just fuck any man out there. You’re beautiful, and you’ve grown into quite the young lady.” He told me, and somehow the last comment seemed too intimate, as if he watched me grow up, and that was too much for me. I looked at him blankly, questioning my life, and how a complete stranger so easily dissected my life within a few breaths.
“How do you know I’m not a virgin?” I snapped back, making the man smirk a little.
“There’s that too. The fire in your eyes when you get cornered. I like that in you, but you’ll soon learn to not direct it at me most of the time, but when you disobey, I’m quite sure I’ll like that too.” The man continued, as if I didn’t say anything at all. I just stared at him. I wanted the answer. Somehow, it seemed important. I needed to know how he knew.
“Would you like me to demonstrate?” He said, and I almost snapped yes before even thinking about it.
My eyes were wide, and he just had one eyebrow quirked at me, waiting for me to say something. I shook my head, but my voice was lost to me. The man had crossed the room, and I hadn’t gotten the courage to move. His hand was at my throat, and I could feel my pulse quicken, but he never squeezed. His fingers trailed up my throat and over my cheek before brushing my wild hair out of my face. Then his hand was back at my throat, and I was being pushed down. I arched my back trying to squirm out of his grip, but his fingers held fast and true. I pushed against him as the man positioned himself on top of me.
“Well, my darling?” He said, a whisper against my skin.
I felt something shoot through me. A startled realization that this position was starting to turn me on, and yet I shut it down as quickly as I realized it, sickened at my body’s involuntary betrayal. I didn’t want to be wet. I didn’t want to like him on top of me, asserting himself as if I was inconsequential enough not even to be allowed to speak despite my questions. When I got the courage up to meet his gaze, I saw lust in his eyes, and I knew exactly what he had in store for me. Conflicting emotions boiled up inside of me, but before I was made to confront any of them, he let go. He sat up on the bed beside me, smiling an almost lopsided grin as he watched my reaction to him.
“That’s how.” He said smoothly.
“That’s how I know you aren’t a virgin. There would have –only-been fear. Unless you were a very special type, and if I am wrong, then I’d like to find out.” He said before getting up and going back over to the door. I sobered in the realization of knowing there was no way I could overpower his strength, nor escape. I lay breathless, motionless on the bed.
“Oh, and if you desire to call me something, my name is Andrew, by the way, but you’ll be c
alling me Master eventually.” He said, shutting the door behind him with a soft click. I thought knowing his name would help me feel better, but it was like a punch to the stomach. He would only tell me his name if he was lying or he thought I wouldn’t ever get away. Somehow, the man didn’t seem like a liar.
Andrew: A Sleeping Angel
I hadn’t gone to see her for two days. I wanted to let everything settle for Alina, and that was easier said than done. She had panicked, as I knew she would. Everyone did in such situations, but she had also experienced arousal when I had held her down to the bed, and I knew it. Even if she didn’t want to admit it, there was no denying what I saw. I was older than her, and so I understood her reaction in ways that she couldn’t.
I understand her body in ways she can’t, and that’s something I knew. It was hard to remind myself of that though. I smiled at the camera monitors. She had stopped screaming yesterday. She had shouted questions at the air, knowing I was listening. She had tried to tell me that she’d forget everything if only I would let her go. She had gone through grief for what she had lost, and now she was in the final stage of acceptance. Yet, I still knew that I shouldn’t go see her until tomorrow.
“Soon.” I said to the monitors.
She was sleeping now. Her fits of desperation, and now fits of depression seemed to be wearing her out. I knew she needed the sleep, and that’s why I had put the small amounts of sleep aid in the drink I had delivered to her. She must have known by now that the food was being drugged to allow her to sleep, allowing me to slip in and out to collect the trays. I didn’t need to go into the room to deliver them though. That’s what the panel was for, and she had raged when she first realized that there was no way for her to expect me to come in.
I could give her everything she needed without having too, and it frustrated Alina to no end. She had screamed coward at the top of her lungs, but she knew what I was doing was smart and not cowardly. She just didn’t want to admit it yet. Now, she slept peacefully. Her wild hair splayed out on the pillows, and her breathing had settled into something even and deep. She was soundly asleep, getting the rest that she’d no doubt need in the days to come. It would only get more mentally exhausting for her before she accepted her new life.
“But soon…” I reminded myself. She’d be mine, and she’d want to be. I had plans for her. I had gone through her things and picked out a few items which I thought would be best for her. I went to the panel to slip through a dress, expecting for her to put it on when she got up. I knew she wouldn’t disappoint me. She had taken a shower, but I had seen the look of disgust at putting on the same outfit as before, again and again.
Alina: Continuous Compromises
I was about on the verge of a breakdown. I didn’t know what to do, but I felt that there was nothing I could do. It wasn’t uncertainty that was breaking me. It was hopelessness. I looked at the door more times than I could count. I tried to find where the cameras were being kept, and yet I could find nothing. This room was made almost perfectly, and there was no way that I could just kill myself, though I’d not yet completely fallen off the cliff of sanity enough to want to do harm to myself. Still, I lay hopeless.
I loathed to admit it to myself, but there was a part of me that wanted to see what was going to happen next. Knowing that if he wanted to snuff my life out, he’d have done it by now, the fire of desire I felt in his eyes me had laid upon me, prodded my darkest desires of wanting to know what he’d do to me. I wanted to see him again. I told myself time and time again that it was just so that I’d have the chance to escape, but I couldn’t think about escaping in detail, no matter how hard I tried. What do you have to go back to? A little voice in my head would remind me, and that little voice seemed to be growing by the day.
That’s when the door opened, and I looked up, seeing him there. He had those dark eyes that seemed to sparkle, with a small smile curving his lips. He was handsome, and yet I wanted to hate him. I had put on the dress that I had found earlier. It was more of a slip, but I appreciated having something to change into, which I had done as soon as I had finished cleaning up. I looked at him. He had a bag, and my heart started to pound a little more.
“What are you doing?” I asked, but Andrew just smiled at me.
“Call me Daddy, or Master” He told me, and I blanched. There was no way that I was going to call him Daddy, and I sure as hell was not about to call him Master, I thought defiantly. It seemed all too odd.
“You don’t want to call me, Master. So why not Daddy?” He said, and I gave him a look like he was crazy. He just chuckled, sitting down and staring at me. The door had clicked behind him, and so I knew that even if I could get past him, there was no chance of running out.
“You look beautiful in that dress.” He said, and I pursed my lips, trying not to say anything at all to him.
“You’re not going to talk to me, hmm?” He said, and I said nothing. He got up to leave, and I tensed. No matter how much he was getting under my skin, I didn’t want to be alone again.
“Don’t.” I yelped, and the word slipped out before I could stop it. I hated the sound of desperation dripping from my voice.
“Then do it. Daddy or Master. It’s your choice.” He said, tapping his foot, but he wouldn’t move from the door. I glared at him, but Andrew just shook his head before moving closer again.
“Daddy…” It came out before I could stop it, but I didn’t want to this time. I still hated the sound of my own voice, but I wanted him to stay. I couldn’t be alone again. I felt like I was going to go insane.
“Good girl.” Andrew cooed at me before taking a seat again. “I knew you’d want me to stay. I’ve missed you too, but it seems like you were just ready for me again.” He said, but I said nothing. I didn’t want to dignify it with a response.
“Would you like shoes?” He said, and my heart leapt. I hated walking barefoot. If I was barefoot, there’d be no chance of me escaping.
“Yes.” I said. “Please.” I added. I gritted my teeth, but there was nothing I could do to stop him from smiling as he took out flats. I hated that they weren’t tennis shoes, but I knew it was better than no shoes at all. He put them on the table for me, but I didn’t move to go get them, yet. He didn’t push me to do so either.
“I’m glad your manners haven’t wasted away.” He said. “You really are beautiful, Alina. I will have to get you your heels back soon.” He told me, but heels were the last thing on my mind.
“Would you like something from your house?” He said, and my eyes widened. The idea that he had been in my house was too much. It was simply just that. Too. Much. And it sent a shiver through me. I nodded, despite myself.
“Please.” I added when he said nothing.
“Please, Daddy.” I cried out in desperation, and that’s when he took out a teddy bear.
It was worn, and it had one eye missing. There was no doubt that it was my teddy bear. It had been with me from foster home to foster home, and despite me being eighteen now, I had never managed to throw it away. My heart broke seeing it here with me. It had gone through one hell and then another as I jumped from home to home, and seeing it now, while I went through his hell, undid me. I started to cry. I wailed. He walked over and gave it to me, and I took my teddy bear, holding it close to me.
I knew I was blubbering with tears running down my cheeks. I knew that when I cried I looked like a broken down mess, but I didn’t care. All I cared about was that stuffed animal that was undoing me as I held it to my heaving chest. He put his arms around me, pulling me back to his chest as I cried, and it seemed to only make me cry harder. No matter what I did, it wasn’t pretty. I couldn’t seem to stop the tears from coming, and I could only feel my chest aching and my eyes burning.
“Shhh. It’ll be okay. I have you.” He said, and the absurdity hit me.
He was causing me so much grief, and yet I was leaning back against him despite myself. I couldn’t help but to take some comfort in the way he cradled
me and I cradled my teddy close to me in turn. Soon, the tears were a little less, and my sobbing started to subside. He kissed my cheek, whisking the tears away like I had hoped so many men would do throughout the tough times in my life. I thought about all of the times that I had cried with my teddy close to me, and how during all of those times no one had ever done what this man was doing for me. They had never held me while I had cried, and no one had ever told me it would be okay. Despite the absurdity, I felt that with someone there, holding me securely, that somehow I’d make it through in a way I’d never had faith in before.
“Shhh, baby. I have you.” He said again, and his hand wrapped around me a little tighter.
I couldn’t bring myself to struggle even as he started to trail his hand down further. The tears were starting to slow, and he had me pressed up against his chest as I sat between his legs. I don’t remember getting in the position, but the dress hiked up me around my hips, and he spread my legs. I didn’t fight as he started to rub my clit, but instead I closed my eyes.
I let the sensation that he was causing seem to wash away the pain that I was feeling as his fingers worked my sensitive nub into a frenzy. I arched against him, and a soft cross between a moan and a hiccup came out of my mouth. He didn’t laugh at me, he just kissed my neck. I let that feeling push everything else away so that I could worry about it another time, and I held my teddy bear closer as he started to slip his fingers down my now wet slit. His fingers spread my lips, pushing a finger into my pussy as I moaned. He crooked his finger, making me buck against him before he slid another finger in.
“I told you it’ll be okay. I’ll take care of you now.” He said, and I didn’t let those words sink in.
I just pushed back against his fingers, fucking back against them as he brought me closer to orgasm and oblivion with each thrust of his fingers. He obviously had experience. And, it was also obvious he knew what he was doing when he played my body perfectly. His other hand went up to my breast, massaging one and then the other. The fabric against my nipples and the way his calloused fingers started to manipulate them, had me crying out in pleasure now instead of sorrow.
