by Cate Farren
I didn’t dare hope for a release from this nightmare. Perhaps it was too late. My daughter had grown up, had her own children. I’m a great-great-grandmother now. My family think I’m long dead. There’s nothing to go back to.
I want it to end. I want a proper life again.
I could go to my family. It’d shock them to know I was still alive, but they’d get over it. I knew who they were and what they did. I was very proud of them. I wanted to know them and to hug them so much.
“I know you’re worried,” said Granny. “But it won’t affect the curse. You’ll be safe.”
When I finally killed Dorian the curse would break. Unfortunately, that meant I would age to death and die. It was a small price to pay for saving my family.
I stood up. “I don’t have much hope. Not any more.”
I left them to it. They had other things to be dealing with, Fire Circle witch matters. They didn’t need me hanging around, feeling sorry for myself. Besides, I needed a good twelve hours of undisturbed, blissful sleep.
When I got back to my cabin I saw the door was open. It was anathema for one of us to steal from another. I trusted the others not to invade my privacy like this.
I pulled a serrated knife out of my belt and erected a magical shield around myself. I entered my cabin, looking around. Nothing had been disturbed. Everything seemed in its place. I collected souvenirs from my travels, allsorts of odd trinkets from parallel Earths. My most prized possession was my packet of dodo jerky. I hadn’t had the heart to open the packet and eat it.
“This place is a garbage heap,” a voice mocked. “Do you ever clean it?”
Someone was sitting on my bed. It was me.
***
I clutched Amara to my breast, trying to calm down her terror. I couldn’t stop my own fear from being revealed. I thought Queen Victoria would never find me here, never mind come for me herself. Yet here she was, standing in my Chapel Green home, anger and rage making her face permanently unpleasant.
“What do you want?” I asked.
I couldn’t be angry with her. Leopold’s loss had broken her even more than she was already broken. Yet I wanted her gone. I wasn’t her personal witch any more. I was nothing to her.
She stared at Amara for a wistful second before saying, “She has Leopold’s eyes and kind smile. How is she?”
“She’s doing fine,” I said. I hesitated before saying, “Do you want to hold her?”
Victoria shook her head. I was about to lay into her for being so selfish when a figure walked by her. I knew who this was. It was Magenta, the queen’s witch assassin. I knew enough about this person to know she was dark and vile, and I wanted nothing to do with her. I despised her with a passion. She’d taken something from me that I could never get back.
I suddenly realised I was in terrible danger.
“You failed to protect my son,” said Queen Victoria. She showed no emotion whatsoever. “You allowed his killer to escape justice. I curse you to find Dorian and kill him.” I tried to object but I couldn’t seem to speak. “If for one moment the curse thinks you’re not hunting him down, your child and any children she might have will suffer untold pain and agonies until they die. If you don’t kill Dorian with your bare hands, the same will happen.” She grinned, revelling in her vengeance. “You will live forever until you’re done, and then you’ll die.”
Heidi scowled and waved her hands. Magical energy emanated from her fingers and shot at me, entering my head, infusing my entire body. I screamed with pain, dropping Amara as the curse gripped me.
Amara started to cry as I staggered and picked her up. I was still in pain, but I cared more for seeing my daughter hurt. Victoria was turning away from me as I shouted, “I loved him! I love Leopold more than I loved myself!”
Victoria turned back. “Then you should welcome the chance to avenge him.”
“What about my daughter?” I cried. “Who’ll look after her while I hunt down my brother? You know he fled to another dimension! How am I supposed to find him?”
“I don’t care,” said Victoria callously. “Just find him and kill him.”
“You’re a monster. I hope you die miserable and alone.”
Victoria said, “I’d already resigned myself to such a fate.”
I hugged my daughter close and wept.
Chapter 2
I’d come across my doubles in other dimensions occasionally, though I tried to keep out of their way as much as possible. Not only did it freak me out, it made them nervous too, especially if they were non-magical or had no idea about other Earths. I also had to admit that seeing a version of myself with a better life often made me feel jealous.
“What are you doing here?” I asked. I kept my shield up. I didn’t sense danger coming from her, but you could never be too sure. “Why are you in my home?”
She crossed her legs. She was wearing skin-tight black leather and her head was shaved to the scalp. Her boots, also black, were dirty and covered in mud. She wore minimal make-up; just enough to give her eyes that extra zing.
“It’s not often I meet another me,” she confessed, standing up. We stood face to face. It was like looking into a distorted mirror. “Most Kezia Campbells ended up dying of old age like they were supposed to.”
“Some people have all the luck,” I grumbled.
She seemed shocked. “You want to die?”
“Tell me what you want and leave.”
She looked around my home, sighing, criticizing my personal space with her eyes. “I abandoned my hunt for Dorian a long time ago. I didn’t care if my family died or not. Living forever is worth the sacrifice.” She smiled upon seeing my disgust. “Anyway, that’s not why I’m here. We have a common enemy.”
I sat on my desk chair, waiting for her to continue. I wouldn’t relax or let my guard down until she was gone.
“Speak,” I commanded.
She glared at me darkly before saying, “Your brother is in my world, colluding with my brother. I don’t know what they’re up to, but it concerns me, and it concerns Circe. She sent me to get your help.”
I detected a faint undercurrent of worry in her voice. It seemed she did care after all, but only about Circe. Like me, the ancient witch must have been the only family she had. Circe may not have been blood, but she was as good as.
She crossed her legs again, seeming impatient.
“You want to go now?” I asked.
“No time like the present,” she said.
I sighed with annoyance. “I’m tired! I haven’t slept in…”
“I may not have wanted the hassle of hunting down my brother, but I know you must hate him almost as much as I do. I’m giving you his location. Surely that warrants a swift exit to find him?”
She was right. Dorian was in arm’s reach and I had a real shot of killing him, especially if I had the help of another me. Even though this offer seemed too good to be true, I had to take it. I might actually be able to kill Dorian at last.
“Are you worried about dying?” she asked.
Her personal question took me off-guard. She sounded like she actually cared about what my answer might be.
“I suppose,” I admitted, hating that I was opening up to her. She was technically me, albeit a more twisted version. “But Dorian needs to die.”
“You’re a real martyr, you know that?”
“Are you telling me there’s not one single part of you that will be glad to see Dorian dead?”
She rubbed her hands over her bare scalp, twisting her lips with distaste. She didn’t need to say anything. I already knew her answer.
***
Circe gave me a look to say I was insane. I know how she felt. I shouldn’t trust the other me, though I could trust how much she hated her brother. That had to mean she wouldn’t betray me, right?
I never knew I was so damn naïve.
“You’re so damn naïve,” Circe said icily.
I couldn’t help but grin. She knew me so well. S
ometimes I was sure she could even read my mind, though she denied she had such an ability. Maybe she’d seen and done everything over her absurdly long life and knew every facet of life.
Circe lived in the largest structure in their little village, a chalet that looked like it had been plucked from the Swiss Alps and dumped in Alaska. Maybe it had. I’m sure she had that power. It was cosy inside, rustic and warm, but with an air of magical energy swirling around, infusing everything. Circe was considered the oldest witch in the world. Even Dracula himself was in awe of her power.
She was estimated to be over ten thousand years old.
“This is the biggest lead we’ve had in a very long time,” I explained. There was a white fox curled up on the floor, nestled on top of an ox fur. He was called Essian, and was easily as old as Circe herself. “She could lead us right to him. We might even be able to find out what the demon inside him is up to. Why is he joining forces with another version of himself? He’s never done that before.”
“I agree that finding out his plans is important, but so is your life. I fear she may be leading you into a trap.”
It had occurred to me, but I had to assume she wanted her brother dead more than she wanted to betray me. If the hatred she felt for Dorian matched my own, then I could trust her. Then again, she had let her family die due to the conditions of the curse. I could never do that.
I sat down, closing my eyes. I was so tired. So damn tired. I’d been chasing Dorian for so long, a war without end. Essian looked up at me, giving me a look as if to say I had it easy. Perhaps I had, compared to his immortal fox life.
“Go,” said Circe. “Find him. Just…”
She didn’t want me to die. If I went to kill Dorian, I’d die and she’d never get to say goodbye to me. This would be the last time I would see her.
I said, “You looked after me when I needed you. I’ll never forget you. You know that, right?”
“I’ll miss you.”
Circe wasn’t into hugs and shows of affection, but I gave her a kiss on the cheek anyway. She could grumble about it when I was gone.
“Be careful,” she warned me. Essian watched me carefully, blinking a few times. I took that to be his own form of saying goodbye.
“Don’t worry,” I assured her. “I’ll be extra vigilant.”
I thought about my family. I had a granddaughter called Philomena. She was a witch well into her late seventies. She had a son called Chad, and he had two children, twins called Ronnie and Dylan. Every now and then I’d pop over to Chapel Green and watch them from afar. I’d seen them grow up. Each of them was a powerful witch in their own right, and I could see glimpses of myself and Leopold in them. I was proud of them. I wished they could know me, but it wasn’t to be. I was just glad they were alive and thriving.
“Will you watch out for them?” I asked. “My family.”
Circe smiled enigmatically. “Of course.”
***
The other me gave me a five-hour rest period. I wasn’t sure what she got up to during that time, though I think she visited Circe. Perhaps she was curious as to what this version of her mentor was like.
I opened the door of my cabin to find the entire clan waiting for me. It was a sea of hopeful, but mournful, faces. I’d never see any of them ever again and it wounded me. These people were my family, a mix of the most powerful witches pulled from dozens of different races and communities. They gave me comfort and healed my wounds and salved my soul when I was sad. They were my everything.
“We all wanted to say goodbye,” said Granny Maya. She was weeping openly. I rushed into her arms and gave her a long, warm hug. She kissed me on the cheek and said, “Good luck, my dear.”
I looked to the others, saying my goodbyes, noting that Circe was absent. I knew she wouldn’t turn up to wish me farewell. I was like a daughter to her. Sending me to my death would be too painful for her.
When I was finished I pulled Granny into a hug again.
“Look after Circe,” I whispered into her ear. “She may act like a tough old bitch but she’s more sensitive than the rest of us put together.”
“I will,” said Granny. “I promise.”
She placed something into my hands. It was Circe’s golden chain necklace. She’d worn it for as long as I could remember. The piece of jewellery was as old as the witch herself.
“She wants you to have this,” said Granny. “It will bring you good luck and increase your magical strength by a factor of two. You’ll need it.”
I couldn’t believe it. “But Circe never takes this off. She even bathes and sleeps with it around her neck.”
“You need it more.”
I was beyond touched that Circe would gift me her most prized possession. I would honour it and make sure I used its power to my advantage.
I felt a tug at my leg. I looked down to find Essian, staring up at me with his huge fox eyes. I tickled his head.
“Have you come to say goodbye too?” I asked him.
“He’s going with you,” Granny Maya declared.
I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t need or want a companion. What would happen to him once Dorian and I were dead? He’d be stuck on some other world with no way to get home.
“I can’t,” I insisted. “He won’t be able to come home.”
Maya winked. “He has his ways.”
I sighed and resigned myself to having a fox companion. I should be honoured. Most witches didn’t have animal familiars any more, having deemed the practice cruel centuries ago. Essian was far from a captured animal spirit, though. He had his own personality and seemed to be independent from Circe most of the time. Perhaps he could come in handy.
“Fine,” I said. “He can come.”
He nodded his head, making me wonder, not for the first time, whether he was more than just a fox.
“Are we going or not?” the other me demanded.
She was standing to the side, away from the crowd of wellwishers. She didn’t appear to be comfortable with all this public affection.
I ignored her. I’d take as long as I needed to say goodbye to my family.
I felt something whisper in my head.
“Take care.”
It was Circe. I smiled, glad to hear her voice one final time, even if it was in my head.
“I entrust you with my necklace and my fox. Destroy Dorian, and have a good death. You deserve rest.”
Before I had a chance to say something back she vanished. I looked away, trying to stop the tears from coming. I’ll never forget what Circe did for me, never. As far as I was concerned she was my second mother.
I turned my back on my clan, a mixed group from so many lands and so many heritages, and walked toward the other me. Essian walked by my side, his head held high, as ready for this as I was.
“Where to first?” I asked.
“We’ll go straight from here,” she said, zipping up her warm coat. “The Alaska of my world is uninhabited, but I have a caravan waiting for us. Hopefully they’re still there.”
I nodded. “Is there anything I should know of your world?”
“We’re at war,” she said. At my gobsmacked look she added, “It’s far too complicated to explain. Let’s just get going and I’ll tell you everything when we get there.”
She created a portal in the air. It was a lot bigger than my own, green in colour, its pull attracting flakes of snow that were falling from the sky. Essian leaped in, followed by the other me. I took a deep breath and jumped in too.
Chapter 3
Travelling from one universe to another was a simple process. It was like going down a really long water slide at an aqua park, only it lasted longer and there was no water. When I first started travelling between dimensions I thought it was fun. Now it bored me.
I’m never going to see Circe again.
The portal spat me out headfirst into a snow bank. I knew how to land after so many journeys, but I’d been too busy thinking about Circe and the others to concent
rate.
I heard yapping, realising that I must have landed on Essian. I pulled out of the pile of snow, rolling aside, getting to my feet. I shook my long black hair free of flakes, noting with amusement that the other me was doing the same with her clothing.
“I hate portal riding,” she complained.
I grinned. “You get used to it.”
“How many worlds have you visited?” she asked, curious.
“I’ve lost count.”
Essian shook his fur, showering us with more snow. I looked around, finding my surroundings to be almost identical to the place we’d left. Most people probably couldn’t tell the difference, but I could. I knew my home and what every mountain and peak looked like. On this world it was similar but slightly to the left, almost as if the tectonic plates here moved at a different rate.
The other me pointed toward a light on the horizon. It seemed like a fire, burning brightly. I could make out multi-coloured tents and see figures walking around.
“I miscalculated,” said the other me. “We were supposed to come out over there. Come on.”
I followed her, keeping my wits about me. I didn’t know a thing about this world. For all I knew the snow was poisonous or the ground itself could swallow me up.
“What’s the most interesting place you’ve ever visited?” the other me asked.
The snow was falling heavier now, reducing direct visibility down to only a few feet. I didn’t mind the snow. I was used to it.
“I tracked Dorian to this world where everyone was descended from mechanical beings created by an ancient race,” I explained. “It was a utopia. Humans were extinct, but this new people thrived. They saw my magic as something extraordinary. I was sad to leave.”
We crunched through the snow, finding the pace difficult. I wondered why she was refraining from talking about her own world.
“Why are you at war?” I asked her.
“The Scale Empire want all warm-blooded species dead,” she explained. “We’ve been at war with them for hundreds of years. To be honest I’m not entirely sure why it started. It calmed down a lot recently after the old king died, but…”
