Vow of Atonement

by Emma Renshaw

  “We are not,” Harper shrieks, taking on a pitch that could break my eardrum. She takes a large drink from the wine glass in front of her. When she sets the glass down, I notice her hands are shaking. My stomach tightens at the thought of making her too uncomfortable. I love to piss her off and provoke her. But when it starts to hurt her, I can’t handle it. The last thing I want is to hurt her.

  “We went to high school together,” I explain, letting the innuendos and jokes drop.

  Her straight spine sags slightly when she breathes out a relieved sigh. Valerie and Savannah let it drop, but they’ll grill Harper later. I answer their seemingly endless questions. Harper relaxes a little more with each answer about my life that doesn’t involve her. She hasn’t looked at me or joined in on the conversation since I sat down at the table. When she fully rests against the back of the chair, I brush my fingers over her skin on her shoulder. Besides the tiny flinch when I first touched her, she doesn’t acknowledge me or shake me off.

  “I think it’s time I ask a couple questions,” I say, chuckling after Valerie and Savannah hurl another question at me. “Savannah, Harper told me that you had some trouble last year.”

  Liam tenses behind her, pulling her closer to him, and Savannah’s smile falls a tiny fraction before righting itself again. “I did,” she says warily.

  “When you were going through that, did you let your friends help you?”

  “What are you doing?” Harper demands.

  I ignore her and watch Savannah and Liam. Liam is looking at Savannah with a crease between his brow. Savannah’s eyes are bouncing back and forth between Harper and me.

  “Roman.” Harper’s lethal tone is a warning.

  Savannah finally answers, keeping her eyes on Harper. “Kind of. I should have told them my troubles sooner.”

  I turn my eyes to Harper. Her cheeks are filling with color and her angry eyes are glaring at me through slits. “Roman,” she says again. “Stop.”

  I shake my head. “I don’t care that you’re mad. Your safety is not something I’m willing to risk.”

  “We don’t even know anything.” Frustrated tears are starting to fill her eyes as the anger turns to begging.

  “I know enough. I’m going to be your fucking shadow as often as I can, and if I can’t be there, I’m making sure someone else can be.”

  “Then why are you doing this?” Her voice has turned to a whisper.

  “They’re Plan B.” I will do anything to keep her safe, but she’ll be even safer if every person in her life knows there’s a threat out there.

  “What’s going on?” Liam asks.

  Harper wipes her eyes, even though no tears fell. A quick smile curves her lips up as she turns toward Liam. “Nothing. He’s overreacting.”

  “Harp, what the fuck is going on?” Hudson asks.

  I look around the table at her friends. Every time I dug into her life, I never looked at the people with whom she shared her life. The four men sitting at this table care about her, I can see that. They wouldn’t be able to protect her like I can, but they could help.

  I explain, ignoring Harper’s protests. “Harper’s old landlord for her store sold the building out of left field to some bastard. He’s claiming to be the son of someone Harper considered her uncle. I’m not getting a good read on this situation. There’s something at play and I’m gathering intel. The bastard has his sights on Harper, showed up at her apartment today uninvited even though she never gave him her address. Don’t know much yet, but my gut says it ain’t good.”

  “Who is he?” Liam asks. “Do you know him, Harper?”

  She sighs and closes her eyes, completely resigned. “No, I don’t know him. His father was basically my second dad. The man I knew wouldn’t leave a child behind and be okay with him being raised in a different country. His name is Rafael Bazán.”

  James’ jaw ticks at the mention of Rafael’s name. He doesn’t say a word, has barely uttered one word all night, but he knows something. Hard gray eyes meet mine, and he’s as still as a statue except for the continuous ticking of his jaw. He’s silent while the rest of the group flings questions at Harper. I narrow my eyes, watching him. He gives me a tiny, almost imperceptible shake of his head. I look at Harper and back to him. Whatever he knows, he isn’t sharing with the group.

  13

  Harper

  Roman’s footsteps beat a steady trail behind me down the hallway to my apartment. I haven’t said a word to him since he blabbed everything. I didn’t acknowledge when he said he would see me back at the apartment. I remained silent when he was already out of his car, standing next to my door by the time I got out of mine. When he fell into step next to me, I sped up my pace. It’s a short walk from my car to the apartment door, but I feel like I’ve walked across the country with him right behind me.

  I leave the door open after I walk inside. I’m so tired, and there’s no point in fighting him. There’s never been a point in fighting him. Roman always gets what he wants. Even if I did lock him out, he’d break in. Walking straight into the kitchen, I grab a wine glass and pour until it nearly reaches the brim.

  “Have anything besides wine?” Enjoyment laces his tone.

  “Only for guests.” I haven’t turned to face him, but I can see his reflection in the window above the sink. He’s watching me closely with his hands in his pockets.

  “I’m a guest.”

  “No,” I bite out. “You’re an unwanted visitor, like a bug or mouse.”

  He laughs, not even the slightest bit offended. Irritation tickles its way up my spine. Why can’t I affect him like he affects me?

  “You had no right to do that.” I keep the emotion out of my voice. But my knuckles are turning white from the firm grip I have on the edge of the sink.

  Roman leans against the wall, watching me through the reflection. His arms cross over his large chest and his feet cross at the ankle. Casual as can be. Not a care in the world. Not the least bit affected. Damn him.

  “No right to do what?”

  “Tell my friends about Rafael. Hell, you had no right to even sit at that table with me.” I whip around to face him, unable to stop my chest from rising and falling rapidly along with my heart. “And, you definitely had no right to fucking kiss me. Either time. Before we left the apartment and at the bar.”

  His tense jaw twitches as he watches me yell at him, unable to keep my composure or hide just how much he gets to me. He says his words slowly and quietly. They can barely be heard, but his severe tone carries enough weight as if he shouted them from a mountain top. “I will do anything to keep you safe. There are no lines when it comes to that.”

  “It is not your job,” I insist. Wine sloshes over the rim of my glass before I set it down with shaking hands. Interlacing my fingers together to force the shaking to stop, I take several breaths. My hands have never shaken so much in such a short amount of time. My nerves are completely frazzled.

  “I made a promise.” His tone is rough and angry.

  “What are you talking about?”

  “I made a promise to your dad.”

  All the air in my lungs leaves in one big rush. Time stands still in my tiny kitchen. The world stops turning. I grab the counter behind me after his admission leaves me feeling beaten to a pulp.

  “You made a promise to my dad.” I’m such a fool. Roman told me when we were together that he would always be there for me. He would keep me safe. Everything a boy promises when he loves a girl. That’s not what mattered, though. That’s not why he’s here. He made a promise to my dead father. “When you left ten years ago, none of the promises you made mattered anymore. None of them.”

  “It all fucking matters. Everything. Every word I ever whispered. Every vow I ever made. All of them. The ones to you. The ones to your father. They all matter.”

  I brush away the tears and stare at the man in front of me, a shadow of the boy I once knew. Shaking my head and clearing my throat, I plead with him. “Please l
eave.”

  “No,” he says, walking closer to me. “I’m not leaving.”

  “He’s dead,” I scream, holding up a hand, trying to keep him away from me. If he gets too close to me now, I’ll break completely. “He’s dead. He won’t know if you break your promise. I will be fine on my own.”

  He doesn’t stop moving toward me until his chest touches my hand. He doesn’t push against it to get closer to me, just stands there giving me a tiny amount of space. His hand comes up to cover mine, holding it to him, and he brushes his thumb over my skin.

  “I’m staying.”

  When our eyes connect, every emotion he has ever filled me with rushes to the surface. I have always fallen apart underneath his gaze. I know I could fall head over heels in love with him again. He wouldn’t really even need to do anything. If he just stood there, looking at me the way he does, I’d probably end up begging him to let me have his babies. His eyes have always been able to light me on fire.

  “Fine,” I whisper. “You’re not sleeping in my bed, though.”

  He smiles a devilish grin and raises an eyebrow.

  “I mean it, Roman. I’m done fighting with you. You can stay but you’re sleeping on the couch and keeping your distance from me. When Rafael proves not to be the dangerous conman you think he is, you’re leaving. Packing up and heading back to Nashville.”

  “Listening to every word I said tonight?”

  “Your voice is like nails on chalkboard, kind of hard to ignore. You’ll be back in Nashville in no time.” That’s not true, his deep rumbling voice is seriously sexy.

  “We’ll see, Sugar.”

  “Don’t call me that.”

  Roman pushes against my hand, his strength too much for me, leaning into me. His lips caress the shell of my ear before he starts whispering. “How can I call you anything else when I know how sweet your skin is. How sweet your pussy tastes. How sweet your noises are when I make you come. Everything about you is as sweet as pure cane sugar. I could really use some of my favorite sweet dessert, Sugar.”

  I push against him, trying to rein in my breathing and irregular heartbeat. His eyes meet mine right in front of my face. The seductive smile on his face makes my toes curl. “Go get yourself a cake,” I hiss.

  “Not when you can make it and I can eat it off of you.”

  14

  Roman

  At the sound of movement from Harper’s room, I pour her a cup of coffee and make it the way I remember she likes it. I’m willing to bet her taste in coffee hasn’t changed. She likes everything sweet. After adding the amount of cream and sugar she likes, it shouldn’t even be called coffee.

  Harper stumbles into the kitchen rubbing her eyes and grunts when I hand her the mug. She’s never been a morning person. I sit at the table next to her, watching her slowly become a functioning human. Her hazel eyes brighten with each sip and bounce around the room avoiding my gaze. I want her to look at me. I want her to know I thought of her all night. After she ran off, I couldn’t stop thinking about every sweet piece of her.

  My eyes drift down to her cleavage. I smile when her nipples turn to hard peaks through her silk top.

  “Stop it.”

  My grin widens when I look up to find her scolding me. “Can’t help it, Sugar.”

  The scowl on her face is adorable. I don’t want to stop at all. I want to push all of her buttons and make her come alive again. The passion and fire I saw in Harper last night is the girl I remember. We have shit to figure out. I never told her all of my reasons for breaking up with her. I never told her I came back. She thinks I left and never looked back. Even with the years and distance between us, I never left her.

  “I’m dropping you off at your store. Then I’m going to get my stuff from the motel to bring here. I’ll meet you at your store after.”

  “You can’t stay there all day.” Harper runs her hand through her hair, scowling at me.

  “Yeah, I can. I won’t be gone long and you’ll call if he shows up.”

  “I have work to do.”

  “I won’t be in your way.” I have no intention of being in her way, I’m not just not willing to leave her side for a long period of time.

  “You’ll distract me.”

  I could definitely distract her. Harper bent over a desk flashes in my mind.

  “I promise to make the distractions really quick.” I wink and watch her face turn red. She gets up from the table and storms past me to her room, slamming the door.

  “I can hear you laughing,” she yells from her room. This makes me laugh even harder and damn happy that I’m getting under her skin. She’s determined to ignore every time I flirt with her, but I will break down those walls.

  After dropping Harper off at her store, I quickly toss everything from the motel into my truck and start searching for the gym James owns. Rafael’s name carried some weight with him.

  Throwing my truck in park after I pull into the parking lot of Raise the Bar, I jump out and head inside to find some answers. My eyes sweep over the large area. I see him coming out of a room in the back. The receptionist at the front desk tries to stop me, but I ignore her and continue heading straight for him. His head pops up when I’m twenty feet away. The scowl on his face deepens as his eyes narrow into slits.

  James stops walking and crosses his arms over his chest, waiting for me to come to him. I stop in front of him and raise an eyebrow. He knows why I’m here, he knows the information I want. I match his stance, arms crossed over my chest.

  “Tell me who he is.” My demand is rough and curt, leaving no room for friendly interpretation.

  James clenches his jaw and narrows his eyes even more. He watches me for a moment before turning on his heel and striding back into the room he came from. Helpful.

  He can’t get rid of me that easily. I march into his office, stopping in front of his desk. He’s sitting in the chair behind the desk completely still. He still doesn’t speak when I stop in front of him, only continues to glare. I lean on his desk, matching his stare. I will not back down.

  “Door.”

  “What?” I ask, surprised by his one growled word.

  He speaks slowly as if my comprehension level is that of an infant. “Close the door.”

  I push off his desk and throw the door closed, turning back to him. If I expected him to start speaking, I would have been sorely disappointed. He remains sitting in the exact same position. I don’t think he’s even blinked. Completely silent.

  “Tell me,” I demand.

  James finally moves. He points to the chair across from his desk, silently telling me to sit down. If all of his answers are going to come that way, this is going to take much longer than I planned. I sit across from him, narrowing my eyes on him and demand again. “Tell me.”

  After a long, terse silence, James finally speaks. “Why?”

  “Fucking Christ,” I mutter, bowing my head and closing my eyes, gathering every spare ounce of patience I have. “He has his eyes set on Harper, he wants something from her.”

  “Okay.” The expression like pulling teeth comes to mind.

  “Tell me who he is, James.”

  “You don’t need to know.” He finally moves a fraction of an inch, just a tiny shrug.

  “How am I supposed to protect her if I don’t have all the information?”

  “Keep your head on a swivel.”

  “Has anyone ever told you that you’re charming?” I ask, looking away. I’m on the verge of jumping across his desk and ripping him limb from limb unless he starts giving me answers.

  “All the time.” When I look back at him, there’s a small twitch of his lips.

  I try another tactic. “Look, I know you don’t know me, but you know Harper. I see that you care enough about her that you wouldn’t want her to be hurt.” He bristles. I keep going, trying to reason with him, make him see this isn’t for me. It’s for her. “I need to know what this bastard wants from her. You don’t need to like me. Do this for
her.”

  He points at me. “You keep watch and protect her.” Then points to himself. “I’ll handle Rafael on my end.”

  “Goddammit. Tell me who the fuck he is.” I demand, slamming my fist down on his desk.

  “You don’t need to know.” James growls, just as irritated with me as I am with him.

  “How do ya figure?” I ask sarcastically.

  “The more you know, the more danger you’re in.”

  I stand up, done with his cryptic responses. James has height and bulk on me; he looks like he could pulverize anyone, but he’d be nothing compared to me if he stood in the way of keeping Harper safe. Leaning over his desk and getting in his face, I growl my words. “Fucking tell me everything you know. I will fucking end you if you’re the reason something happens to her.”

  James stands to his full height before coming down to the same position I am. “I wouldn’t let anything happen to her. I should kick you out of my gym. Sit your ass back down.”

  I’m about to respond when he keeps speaking. “You want answers or not? Sit the fuck down.”

  I glare at him before slowly lowering myself back into the seat. If this wasn’t for Harper, I would already have been gone and not obeyed him like a damn dog. I try to calm down, but I really want to tear this place apart.

  Once I’m seated, James sits in his chair again and sighs before clearing his throat. “It’d be better if you knew nothing about him. The more you know, and more importantly, the more Harper knows, the more danger you’re both in. He isn’t someone to fuck with. I told you, I would get you answers. I can handle him on my end. I will tell you just enough to make sure you’re covered on all fronts.”

  I shake my head. “Not good enough. I don’t give a fuck about danger. I can handle myself.”

  “Don’t doubt that, but you have no idea what you’re getting yourself into.”

  “If it’s so dangerous…” I drawl out sarcastically. “Then why do you have so much information?” This guy probably doesn’t know anything about being in a real dangerous situation. He just looks like he handles danger. All talk.