by Mia Ford
“Oh God, that feels good,” I groan. “So fucking good.”
Ben pushes me back, he lies me down on the couch and kisses me all over my face and neck. Each time his lips brush against me the sensations of excitement intensify within me. I throw my hands above my head and close my eyes. His hands reach down and slowly unbuttons my flannel pyjama top. It isn’t the sexiest item that I’ve ever worn, but Ben is pawing at it like it is. I don’t have a bra on underneath, so his hand cups my breast in an instant which makes Ben’s breathing become much more intense and ragged.
“Oh God, Serena, you feel so good. I can’t even describe it. You’re amazing.”
Despite the fact that we have children now and everything is really different, it still kinda feels like our first time together. The way he grasps at me needily, like it’s the very first time he’s ever grasped hold of me. I love it, I love the way this makes me feel.
Then his mouth moves over one of my nipples and my back arches against him. He teases by rolling and teasing and tugging with his teeth. It’s an odd painful sensation that somehow manages to be incredibly pleasurable. He’s on fire, and he’s lighting my body up like a damn Christmas tree as he does. I fire on every cylinder, my excitement level growing.
“Oh, Ben.” I run my fingers through his hair, fixing him in place, and he continues to run his tongue all over me. “You’re killing me right now.”
When he shifts his body upwards so he can kiss my mouth I take the opportunity to slide my fingers tantalisingly down his body so I can feel his cock. I’ve missed him, more than I thought I would and now I need to hold him. I need to feel that thick steel rod of his between my fingers. The idea makes my mouth water. I can barely contain myself.
It doesn’t take me long to find his length, after all I’m still very familiar with his body, and as I hold him between my fingers, my heart explodes with love. That’s how all of this started, with a deep sexual connection that I hadn’t ever felt before. Who knew that connection would turn into all of this? I think even with my rose-tinted goggles on, I didn’t know it would be this incredible.
I run my hand up and down his thick warm length, gasping blissfully as I do. Sometimes I forget how big he really is, and it gives me that nervous excitement sensation in my chest once more.
“I gotta tell you, Serena,” Ben grunts into my ear, allowing his breath to tickle my cheek. “Your touch is about to fucking make me explode. You want to be careful if you don’t want this to be over all too quickly.”
I pout and pull my hand away. “Fine, but I’m not happy about it.”
“And to think, I assumed I would be the one to corrupt you. Little did I know it would be you who corrupted me.”
His words fire me up even further, so I spin myself around until he’s the one on his back and I’m straddling him. I love this sensation of power and control, it makes me feel sexy. Which is hard since I’m in these flannel pyjama bottoms...
I push myself off Ben and slide them down. I don’t have any panties on anyway, I must have forgotten to put some on, which works out well now. Then I climb back on and sit above him so he can see all of me. Yes, my body has changed. I don’t think any woman can go through labour and come out of it completely the same, especially since I’ve had twins, but the way that Ben’s looking at me it’s as if I still look exactly the same as I did the day we first me.
“You really are something else, you know that?” Ben pushes himself up to kiss me. One of his hand knots up into my hair but the other one runs slowly up and down my thigh. With every brush he gets ever nearer to where I need him, which soaks my slit and gets me even more desperate for him. It’s been too long, I might just explode.
“Will you stop teasing already?” I gasp breathlessly. “Don’t forget we have two little mites who enjoy ruining our alone time together at every opportunity.”
“You’re right with that one.”
He slips one finger right up into me, and it feels incredible. My body bucks violently as a reaction to the way he caresses and massages my insides. He’s touching me like I’m something precious, something to be looked after, which is surprisingly what I need. It’s slow and sensual and it feels really good.
Eventually he brings his thumb into the mix, which he flicks over my clit. My body is already so hypersensitive that a pressure instantly stiffens me. My stomach is hot, my head spins, my heart hammers... I’m losing control. I can see what Ben meant now when he said about me touching him, it’s too much. The only difference is that I’m too weak to stop him. I don’t want it to end...
“Oh my God, Ben,” I pant. “I can’t... it’s too...”
I’m on the knife edge, teetering on the edge of desire. It won’t take long for me to fall into the abyss, I can feel it, the pleasure is coming for me. It’s rushing towards me like a hurricane, swirling in my belly, spinning too rapidly through me...
Then Ben yanks his fingers out of me which gives me a moment to breathe. I try to calm myself down, I need to bring everything back down before anything else happens so I don’t lose myself too quickly, but I can’t seem to do it. I’m burning brightly, swimming in stars, any minute now I think I might fall into the abyss of pleasure whether Ben is touching me or not. The memory of his fingers is all too much.
“I think it’s best to be safe,” he gushes while grabbing a condom from his pocket. “After what happened before.”
I giggle a bit of a nervous sound. “Yeah, I think you’re right. We learnt that lesson the hard way. Always be careful.”
Once he rolls the latex over him, I pull him back towards me. I wait for him to angle himself into me so that I can ride him, but he doesn’t let that happen. Instead, Ben takes control by flipping me so I’m the one on my back. Once there he rests his forehead against mine and he gazes into my eyes. As we stare at once another there’s so much love flowing between us that it swells and fills up my chest.
“I love you,” Ben insists in his strongest, sweetest voice. “You have no idea how much, Serena. You really are my whole world.”
And there it is. The reminder that it isn’t the same. It’s better, it’s more, it’s everything. Ben really is mine now, we don’t have that element of uncertainty anymore. It’s me and him against the world. Well, with Brandon and Rose too, of course. Our reason to keep on fighting.
“I love you too.” I kiss the end of his nose gently. “You’re my world.”
When Ben kisses me again I fell him slide inside me, which instantly drags me back into that deep, passionate haze again. My hair spreads out around my, my eyes roll into the back of my head, my hips buck of their own accord... me and Ben are back, doing what we do best.
He fills me up and pushes deeper with every thrust. I can feel him hitting all the right spots already, and since I’m already on fire this just sends me over the edge too quickly. I cry out and I trash as I draw ever nearer to the wonderful, unexpected moment that I’ve been desperately waiting for ever since I sat down on this couch and Ben started kissing me.
“Oh fuck, Ben!”
I’m over the edge, I’ve fallen. The hurricane has exploded within me. It’s swirling, twirling, cascading, taking me down and I love the sensation. It’s incredible. I never want it to end, especially with Ben gripping onto me as if he feels the same way.
This is someone that I could easily spend the rest of my life with, I think as the pleasure booms. I love him, he loves me, this time I think it might just last.
Once we lie in one another’s arms, panting and gasping in the post coital bliss, I revisit that last thought I had as the orgasm swirled and crashed inside me. Actually, I think I’ve always thought that Ben is someone I could marry, that’s why I got so carried away by him in the first place, but now I really feel it. Now it isn’t just a fantasy, it’s a reality. It’s not like I think it’s going to happen any time soon, but it isn’t something that I think will never happen either.
Mom, Dad, if only you could see me now. If only you co
uld learn that it all worked out for the best. Would you still stick by your decision to throw me out when I needed you the most?
I don’t even care about their actions anymore, it’s them missing out, not me. I’m doing just fine with my brand new family. They don’t deserve a piece of me, not anymore. I have everything that I need right here.
“Are you hungry?” Ben gasps from beside me. “Shall we use this rare free time to do something else that we adore?”
“What, eat?” I laugh. “Sure, that sounds great.” My stomach grumbles loudly at the mere mention of food. “Really great apparently. Thank you. What did you have in mind?”
“I do a really good meat and beans on toast, how does that sound?”
“Mmm, it sounds delicious. Thank you, my wonderful top chef.”
“Top chef?” He wiggles his eyebrows playfully at me. “You have no idea, you’re in for a real treat.”
When Ben stands up and he pulls his clothes back on him, or more comfortably around him anyway, things happened a bit quick for us to get him fully naked, I smirk happily to myself at the sight of him. I really did land a good guy; handsome, lovely, a great father... I really don’t need anything else. Somehow I managed to get it all.
Chapter Twenty Nine – Ben
“Are you ready for this?” Tia asks me nervously, fiddling with my clothing as if she’s my mom. “Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”
“Will you stop it?” I bat her hands away from my shirt. “I know what I’m doing, alright? You’re going to make me more nervous than I am.” I glance my eyes everywhere. “Do you think it looks alright? Do you think she’ll be happy with it?”
“You know who you’re talking about right?” Tia giggles. “Serena will love it. She loves everything that you do, but the fact that you’ve gone to so much effort for her birthday will make her weep. Don’t forget, the last birthday she had she spent pregnant and alone.”
“Don’t remind me.” A darkness clouds me for a moment, I will always feel guilty for that. “I didn’t even know it was her birthday then, I can’t be blamed.”
“I know, I know. I’m not trying to make you feel bad. I’m just reminding you that she will absolutely love anything you do for her. You’ve gone from strength to strength these last ten months. This surprise party is something she’ll love.” Tia glances down to my pocket. “It’s the other bit I’m worrying about. Do you know what you’re doing? What you’re going to say?” I nod slowly. “I have to admit that proposing in front of a lot of people is a very brave thing to do. Either brave or crazy stupid, I can’t quite work out which one you are.”
I roll the ring around in my pocket, loving the feel of it there. “Yes, I know, but this is right, you know? And it isn’t everyone. Just the people who have been a big part of this.”
“Yeah, I know, that’s true.” She glances at her watch. “Right, we better get ready because your mom will be here with the kids in a minute, then it won’t be long until Jenny comes back with Serena after their spa day.”
“You and Jenny all good now then?” I know that she’s probably told me already, but I’ve been too tired running a business and being a dad to fully pay attention to everything going on around me. “All the Mike stuff sorted out?”
“Once we trapped him into confessing that he’d been seeing us both at the same time and he started crying... yeah, we became good friends after that. It was too glorious a moment for us not to bond over, you know?”
“Oh yeah... it sounds it.” I want to laugh, but I have to admit there’s a tiny part of me that feels sorry for Mike. Just a tiny bit. He probably didn’t realise what an asshole he was being, I never did when I led that freer life style. “Well, I’m glad it’s all done anyway. That’s pretty awesome.”
“Makes life easier... was that the door? I’ll go and get it, it’s probably your mom. You just... have a final check over the place, okay?”
She gives me a curious look, but when I nod and I send her away I can understand why I’m shaking all over, I’m a nervous wreck. I feel like I’m all kinds of messed up today. And on this day as well when I need more than ever to keep it together. This will be one of the most important days of my life. Right up there with the day that my kids were born.
Come on, Ben, keep your shit together, I warn myself. Make this a special day for Serena, she really does deserve it.
Mom walks in the room with Brandon and behind her I can see that Tia has Rose. My mother has been a legend when it comes to the twins. I can tell that they’ve revitalised her. She obviously lost her chance to be a parent again when my dad died, since she hasn’t met anyone since, and this has given her that opportunity. She’s grasped onto it with both hands and is now far happier than ever before.
“Ooh, it looks like you two have been busy the last few hours,” she says as she drinks it all in. “You’ve done a great job decorating this place. Serena is going to be very surprised.”
“You think she doesn’t know?” Oh great, my voice is shaking like crazy now. “You think I’ve managed to keep it a surprise?”
“Oh definitely, she doesn’t know. Jenny’s good at covering things up and her plan to take Serena to the spa is a good one.”
“Okay, okay, and what time are they due to be back?”
“Any minute now...” The sound of the door opening interrupts us, making my heart stop dead in my chest. “Okay, I guess now.”
We all take our places and wait. The kids make googling sounds which are adorable. Rose is starting to form words now, just the really basic ones, but she seems to have a sort of secret language with Brandon. It’s like they both know exactly what they’re saying, but no one else does. It’s adorable actually.
“...yeah, she was really nice, wasn’t she? Oh my God!” Serena gasps and claps her hand across her mouth in utter shock. “What’s going on here?”
“Surprise!!” we all yell in unison. Well, semi unison. It’s a little out of time but I think we just about manage to pull it off. “Happy birthday, Serena.”
The kids crawl over to their mommy. Brandon moves a little faster than his sister, but soon they’re both in Serena’s arms. She scoops them both up and hugs them tightly whispering to the pair of them how much she loves them. Then she turns her attention to the rest of us.
“This is amazing, I can’t believe that you’ve done this for me. It’s so nice.”
And that’s the moment the party kicks into gear. It’s a low key affair, without many people here, but that seems to make her very happy. She moves about talking to everyone in turn, while still being able to check on her children. I do the hard work so she can relax and enjoy herself, but she can’t keep away from them for long.
Eventually, she comes to me and she circles her arms around my back so she can press her face up against my back. “Thank you for this. I can’t believe you organised it all.”
“I had some help,” I admit while spinning around in her arms. “I didn’t do it all alone, but I did know that I had to do something nice for you. You do deserve it after all.”
“Well I really appreciate it, it’s awesome.”
I dip my head down to kiss her gently, and as I do I realise that the moment has come. It’s now or never, finally time for me to say what I need to say. I glance around the room and see that everyone is there, no one’s in the bathroom or anything, so I cough loudly to get everyone’s attention. It takes a few moments, but finally everyone seems to get the hint that I’m doing the thing that this has all been worked around, the thing that I’m here for.
“Right, everyone, thanks for coming.” All of a sudden I feel a flame bursting into my cheeks. I’d practiced this over and over again but now I can’t find the words in my brain. It’s as if someone has scrubbed my mind totally clean. “Erm, it’s good to have you here.”
I give Serena a desperate look, begging her to put me out of my misery, but of course she can’t. She has no idea what I’m about to say. I’m all on my own with this on
e. I dip my hand into my pocket and feel the ring there which gives me the confidence to go on.
I fall onto one knee and I stare up into Serena’s eyes. She widens her gaze and looks at me with complete and utter shock. At least this means it is all a surprise. I thought that somehow she might have found out by now, and she was just acting it, but I can tell in her face that isn’t the case at all.
“Serena, I love you. I mean, I really love you more than I thought anyone could love another person.” I rub her hand between my fingers, gleaning some strength from her. “I didn’t think I would ever be the sort of person to fall so hard and fast but I have. I know I panicked at one point and almost messed things up, but I hope that I’ve made up for it since then.”
You have,” she says thickly though the emotion. “You really have.”
“I think it would be nice for the kids, and for me and you too, if we made our love official. I love you so desperately and I would give anything for you to marry me. I want to spend today, tomorrow, and every day afterwards for the rest of our lives making you happy.” I give her a bright smile. “So what do you say? Will you do me the honour of becoming my wife?”
She hesitates, but only for a moment, and only because she’s so overwhelmed. As soon as she can speak again, she gasps out her answer, which thankfully for me is a positive one.
“Of course I will, I would love to be your wife, nothing would make me happier.”
