Jake walked down the hall, wondering what kind of excuse he could use to talk to Haley. Hell, he was a man. He could just ask her to lunch. Of course, then Sam would rip his throat out. Then again, that might just jar him into action, but only if she agreed to go.
He pushed open the outer office door slowly, so as not to startle her. Haley was reclining in her chair, reading through some paper work. She didn’t have any personal effects on her desk. She didn’t have a box either.
“So, how are you?” Jake asked slowly, testing the water.
Haley studied him a moment in a way that made him feel incredibly uncomfortable. “I’m fine. Why do you ask?” Her eyes held a wary look.
“I was just wondering.” He shifted for a moment, trying to decide how to proceed. “My lunch date canceled on me, so I was going to ask Samuel to join me.” He glanced over at the closed door. “Is he in?” Normally he could lie without an ounce of remorse; it was part of what made him such a great investigator. Today, with Haley weighing him, it was unimaginably difficult.
She arched an eyebrow. “No. He’s with Adam at the hospital.” She placed the papers on the desk and folded her hands. “Yet, somehow I think you knew this.”
“Ouch,” he said, not even having to fake a wince. “You’ve got me.”
“So what do you really want?” She was irritable, not having slept well. And she was so incredibly sad that she was likely to take out her frustrations on the first person to cross her path. How unfortunate for him.
“Well, I was really hoping you would join me for lunch.” He ran his hand through his hair. “This is really not going at all like I planned.”
“Sorry to mess things up,” she said tartly.
He leaned over, laid his hands on the desk and smiled at her. “I like my women saucy.”
She frowned, eyeing his hands. “Funny. Right now, I don’t like men at all.”
Jake quickly stood and gave her his most disarming smile. “I don’t suppose we could call a truce long enough to eat lunch, could we?”
She sighed. “And if I say ‘no’?”
“I’ll hound you mercilessly until you give in.” He relaxed some, confident in the outcome even though she wasn’t softening. “Obviously, something has you irritated today. I’m a really great listener. At least give it a chance. You’ll get a free lunch out of the deal.” His voice rose pleadingly.
“And what will you get?” She asked with more than a hint of annoyance.
“Just the pleasure of your company.” He shrugged. “No strings. I promise.” He crossed his heart like a school boy.
“Fine,” she said reluctantly. “You can meet me here at one.”
And now she was setting the conditions? He could really like this chick. What had Samuel done to piss her off? He couldn’t wait to hear all about it. “Great. It’s a date.”
She shook her head. “No, it’s a meal.”
Jake winked at her and chuckled as he left the office. The smile stayed with him all the way back to his desk. He was still replaying the conversation in his head when Samuel called.
“Hey, buddy,” he said somewhat guiltily.
Instantly, Sam was suspicious. “What’s going on?”
He tried to decide how much to share with his boss. “She’s there. She’s not packing. She seems to be doing her job.” He shrugged, hoping that the call would end quickly.
“How did she act?” Sam asked determined to glean every ounce of meaning he could from this conversation.
Jake sighed. This was where it was going to get tricky. “She was annoyed. You really made her angry, man. What happened?” He hoped to deflect attention from him back to the source.
“What makes you think she was annoyed?” He drummed his fingers on the railing in the stairwell.
“Well, you’re going to find out anyway,” he grumbled.
“Find out what, Jake?” Alarm bells sounded in his head and his heart beat furiously.
“I asked her to lunch.” He was going to give away as little as possible.
“You did what?” Sam roared.
“I had to have an excuse for being in the office,” he explained.
“And that was the best you could come up with?” He stomped around trying to collect his thoughts. “So, did she accept your invitation right away?”
“No. I don’t think she really wants to go, but I didn’t give her much choice.” The joy of his conquest was quickly fading.
“And when you saw that she might not be receptive to spending time with you, why didn’t you just back down, shrug it off, and walk away?” He was fuming. Everything was going wrong. First he was convinced she was running away, then he has to hear the bittersweet assurance that she’s still at the office, but now going out with another man.
“It’s no big deal,” Jake said begrudgingly. “It’s just a meal.”
“And it will be your last meal if you try anything with her,” Sam warned. “You are to keep an eye on her, from a distance, and report to me. You do remember that you work for me, right?” He was pacing angrily while he spoke.
“Of course, Mr. Davenport,” Jake responded sarcastically. “Can I ask you one question?”
“Certainly,” Sam said stiffly.
“You don’t want to talk to her right now. You don’t want to be around her right now. I do. So why are you so angry with me? Is it possible you are afraid of losing her? Is it possible that you may even love this woman? I mean, ‘cause I can see why. She was so fiery, just like her hair. She’s wearing it loose today, by the way…” He let his voice trail off while he waited for Sam to snap. It didn’t take long. And he was intentionally baiting the guy. He smiled.
“That was more than one question. And don’t for one moment suggest that I don’t want to be with her. She’s all I think about. And I refuse to consider the possibility that I might lose her, yet it seems more likely the longer I’m away from her.” He growled angrily before completing his thoughts. “Damn you, Jake, for making me think about her even more than normal!” He was exasperated and could barely speak.
“I shouldn’t have messed with you like that,” Jake said after a moment of silence. “I’m not going to lie to you.”
“Thank you for that,” Sam said sarcastically.
Jake rolled his eyes. “I was looking for an ‘in,’ but she was fascinating. I did want to get to know her from our brief conversation. And if I did, then you know other men will want to.” He paused, certain he could almost hear his friend thinking about what he was saying. “Don’t wait too long to fix things. She’s here now, but over lunch I may discover that she already has one foot out the door. Know what I mean?”
“Yes,” Sam said quietly. “I’ll call you back later this afternoon to see how lunch was.” He snapped his phone shut and walked back to the room with a bitter taste in his mouth. He could lose her. His mouth was so dry he could barely swallow as he trudged through the hospital.
“This can’t be a long lunch,” she warned as soon as they had ordered.
“Trying to escape already?” Jake joked. “We haven’t even eaten.”
She sighed. “I have a lot of work to accomplish. I have been put in charge of an advertising campaign. Sam’s not around to help…” She was silent for a second then shrugged off the melancholy. “Let’s just chalk it up to a lot of stress right now.” She glanced around the restaurant, anything to not have to look into those perceptive eyes.
“He must really trust you if he’s letting you do that on your own.” He studied her reaction.
“Right.” She stared back at him with as blank an expression as she could muster and prayed the salad course would arrive soon. At least the conversation could cease while they chewed.
“He’s not available? He’s incommunicado?” Jake fished around.
Haley sighed. “Both, if you must know.”
He gave a sympathetic nod. “He’s very business minded. He’s not as good with people. And he doesn’t handle strong emotions well
. Be patient with him.”
She swallowed a sip of water and studied him. Was she that transparent? “He’s my boss,” she said evenly. “And I’m a temp. As soon as Ellen decides if she’s coming back or not, I’m out of here.”
His eyes widened and he wanted to say more, but the salads arrived. And suddenly he wasn’t hungry. She was focused on the food, using it as a diversion. He took a chance. “You care about him. And he cares about you.”
She shook her head while she chewed. With an empty mouth she responded. “You have asked me to be patient. Clearly neither one of us is prepared for or capable of having anything other than an employee/employer relationship. I think it would be best…” She shook her head, tears formed in her eyes. She didn’t know what to do anymore. Who was she kidding?
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “Thank you for lunch.” She dabbed her mouth, dropped her linen napkin on the edge of the table, and bolted from the restaurant.
Jake sat there stunned. Their waitress hurried over. “Yeah. I’m going to need all of the food packed to go, and the check.” He threw his napkin down in disgust. Now what?
Haley went to the gym and ran on the treadmill until she thought she might collapse. It was as close as she could come to running away for the time being. And as antsy as she had become over the past day, she knew she was making the right decision in leaving as soon as possible. After all, she was less than two months from the anniversary of her attack, and she wanted to get as far away from Pittsburgh as possible. Maybe this time she would move some place warm and sunny, some place that might look at the experience she had in the advertising agency and give her a shot at something more than a temp position. Then she remembered that it would never be possible while she was on the run, hiding her identity. She sighed.
When she finally had showered and returned to her desk, she discovered her leftovers and a note were in the middle of her blotter. She smirked as she read: ‘You warned me you couldn’t stay long, but that was ridiculous.’ She inhaled deeply. She would have to stay late tonight to ensure that she made up her missed time. She had to work on that campaign anyway. Whether they won it or lost it rested firmly upon her shoulders.
Chapter Nine
The week had passed achingly slow for Sam. Day by day he had mentally tabulated a list of all the things he missed about Haley. He missed the way her eyes brightened when she looked at him, which always warmed him through and through. He missed changing into the clothes she had brought him and finding a note stuffed in a pocket. It was never anything lengthy, just something like ‘I’m thinking of you,’ or ‘Can’t wait to see you at dinner.’ The notes always cheered him up. And he missed her cooking. He ate out so frequently that he enjoyed her brand of home made meals. The list stretched on an on. Every day he added to it. And when he summed it all up, he realized he had to get over his guilt and contact her.
“Any idea where she’s staying yet?” He asked Neville when the man dropped off food and clothes that evening.
“Uh, yes, sir. I believe she’s been staying with us.” He watched for a response.
Sam put his fork down. “Explain,” he said crisply.
“Well, I usually dust on Saturday mornings, sir,” he began quietly. That’s when I found Miss Haley’s belongings in the guest room. And the bed had been slept in, I believe.”
“But she was nowhere to be found?” Sam frowned.
“No sir. And I’ve found the back door unlocked every evening, the one that goes out to the garden. I believe that’s the method she’s utilizing for arriving and departing.” He stood staunch still.
“Good,” Sam said quietly. “Keep those doors available for her use.” He rubbed at the stubble on his chin. “I think I may come home later tonight,” he said pensively. “I need a real shave and shower, and it would be nice to sleep in a bed for a change.”
Neville hid a smile. “Very good, sir.”
It felt strange to be sneaking around his own home, but that was precisely what Sam was doing. He had entered through the garden entrance hoping he might catch a glimpse of her through the window working in the study. That room was vacant, so he continued into the house and up the stairs. He paused momentarily when one of the stairs creaked under the weight of him. He watched the guest room door, half expecting her to pop out of it and race away, but nothing happened. It occurred to him that she might even be sleeping, given the hour and how long it had taken him to work up the courage to come home. And he was still afraid, afraid of facing her, even more afraid of losing her, which would explain his presence.
Standing before the guest room door, he paused and listened. Ever so faintly he noted the sound of deep steady breaths being expelled. He turned the handle, half expecting it to be locked, but to his delight the handle turned easily in his hand. Praying that the hinge wouldn’t announce his entrance and frighten her, he leaned against it as he slowly entered the room.
His breath caught at the sight of her. She was lying on the bed wearing a white spaghetti strapped jersey knit nightgown. Her hair cascaded across the pillow in copper waves that radiated from her face. Her lips were slightly parted as though in anticipation of a kiss. And who was he to deny her anything.
Sam bent low over her, fingering her curls. Slowly, his courage built. He caressed her cheek with the back of his fingers, eventually cradling it in his hand. Haley responded by turning to brush her lips against his palm. He shivered. She was so sensual without even trying. Bolstered by her actions, he leaned closer and planted a kiss on her full lips. She wrapped an arm around his neck, pulling him closer.
Instantly, his desire for her grew. He would have liked nothing better than to strip down and climb under the covers with her, make love to her and apologize a million times for his stupidity. Unfortunately, his desire to make things right between them won out. He gradually broke off the kiss. He wouldn’t sleep in a real bed tonight either. He sighed.
Glancing over his shoulder, he left the room and walked purposefully into his bedroom. He changed his clothes, decided to wait on the shave and headed back to the guest room. Quietly, he positioned the chair in a way that it was both beside the bed and blocking the door. He pulled a blanket from the closet and padded back to his seat. He was half asleep when he heard her first stirrings.
It wasn’t like her dreams of the past. She curled up in a small ball and began to weep and shake. “Sam,” she murmured repeatedly. His heart lurched. He had done this to her. “Where are you?” Her tears graduated to near sobs.
He couldn’t stand sitting there and doing nothing. He sat heavily on the bed, jostling her, and gathered her in his arms. “I’m right here, my love. I’m here. I’ll never leave you again. I’m so sorry.” He struggled to keep his own tears from dampening her face.
Haley woke to find Sam rocking her and whispering beautiful words in her ear. In an instant her arms were around him and she was kissing every body part she came in contact with. Her lips were nuzzling his neck, the hollow of his collar bone, his smooth muscular chest. And just as quickly, she stopped, pushed her hands against his chest and struggled to back away.
“Haley,” he said, bewildered, his arms reaching out to her.
“I’m really angry with you, Sam, and hurt.” She shook her head sadly. “I just forgot for a moment.” His arms dropped limply onto the bed. “What are you doing here?”
“I live here,” he said simply.
“Not lately. Are you ready for me to move out? Have you come back?” Her brow was furrowed.
“If I have my way, you’ll never move out, Haley,” he said in a warning voice.
“That’s a mighty big ‘if.’ What makes you think I’d want to stay? I’ve been looking at moving someplace warm, maybe some place with palm trees where I can jog along the beach at sunset.” Her eyes had a wistful quality.
“You’ll be miserable without me,” he admonished, while more than a twinge of concern grew.
“Ha! I’ve been miserable with you.” She crossed he
r arms over her chest. “I gave you everything and you threw it away in an instant without reason or warning. I deserve better.” She scowled.
He was suddenly very tired. “I know you do. And I certainly don’t feel as though I deserve you, but I know I want to be with you. I know I can make you happy. It hasn’t all been bad between us. Remember?” He urged. “We have fun together. We make a great team at work. We are more than compatible physically.” He smiled gently and watched as the heat rose in her cheeks.
“Tell me what happened,” she said quietly, unwilling to give in so easily. “Tell me why you pushed me away and broke my heart.” She wrapped her arms around her knees. “You told me you’d never hurt me, but you did,” she whispered. She dropped her head onto her knees.
Sam could see how upset she was and he was fighting the urge to gather her close and never let her go. He took a deep breath before explaining his mistake. “I was wracked with guilt when I realized that I allowed my need to be close to you, my desire to be with you, keep me from being there for Adam when he woke up.” He watched her reaction. She stared at him with her enormous emerald eyes held wide to stave off tears. “I was punishing myself. It never occurred to me that I would be hurting you at the same time. I was already so used to you being around, being a part of my life that I forgot you weren’t bound to me, you could leave if you wanted without explanation or even goodbyes.” He shuddered, remembering the fear that clenched his gut when he couldn’t find her. “I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”
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