by Nikki Chase
“I’m yours,” she says with a satisfied sigh, her hot breath steaming up the air like the water from the hot tub does.
“Do you mean it this time?”
Katie hesitates, then she says, “Yes.”
Joy threatens to explode in my chest, but I need to be sure. Cautiously, I ask her again, “Do you really mean it? I want you to be sure, Katie. If you’re really mine, I want you to know that I’ll never let you go again.”
“Yes, Adam.” Katie says with more certainty this time. “There’s been no one else, Adam. It was you three years ago, and now you’re back. There was no one else I wanted.”
“So, that means you like me, right?” It’s kind of a dumb question when my dick is still lodged in her pussy, but whatever.
Katie nods.
“And that means you’re not seeing anyone else, right?”
She nods again.
“Got it. That’s all I wanted to know.” I wrap my arms around her wet, naked body as hot water bubbles up around us. I pull her back until her naked body is leaning right against my chest. I whisper in her ear. “I’m yours, too.”
Katie twists her body, dislodging me from inside her. She’s wearing a sweet smile on her face. The lighting from the hot tub casts shadows on her skin that move with the water.
“I know,” she says. “And I’m sorry I didn’t mean it the first time, but you should really stop asking me important questions during sex.”
“Okay. Since we’re not having sex right now, let me ask you one last time. Are you mine?”
“Yes, Adam. I’m all yours.” Katie averts her gaze for a second and smiles shyly.
She’s so fucking adorable. My new girlfriend’s fucking adorable.
I put my hand on her soft, smooth cheek and gaze deep into her eyes. Yes, she means it this time.
As I press my lips against Katie’s smile, she opens up for me and kisses me back. It’s a sweet, gentle kiss.
We’ve always had passion, right from the very beginning, from the first night we met. And now, we have a lot more than that.
We have each other now.
Katie
“Careful!” I whisper-shout as Adam’s grip on the toy he’s holding falters.
It’s like I’m seeing it in slow motion as the toy falls right on top of William’s face. William, shocked, goes quiet for a second before he starts to wail.
Poor little thing. He’s probably scared as hell. He doesn’t know what happened.
I rush to the crib. William was already about to fall asleep when I left the room, so I thought it was going to be okay to leave him alone with Adam while I read a book outside, but apparently not.
“Hey, baby, it’s okay,” I say in a soft, soothing voice as I toss the toy aside and stroke William’s hair.
I hear a soft rattle as Adam picks up the toy. It usually hangs over the crib and plays a song when I pull on the string. William likes to stare at it while he falls asleep.
The past few nights, though, it hasn’t been working. I wasn’t going to do anything about it because William was going to be too old for it soon anyway.
He’s been sleeping fine without the stupid song. But when Adam offered to try to fix it, I didn’t see any harm in it.
William’s not hurt; only shocked. He’s also really sleepy, luckily. As soon as his tears dry, he goes back to sleep.
As William’s breathing deepens and slows down, I twist to look at Adam.
He’s been spending more and more time here, but he hasn’t gotten used to just how tiny and fragile William is.
“Adam,” I whisper. I gesture toward the door. “Talk outside? I don’t want to wake William up.”
He follows me, his heavy footsteps muted by the carpeted floor. In the living room, I sit on the couch and invite him to join me.
I really like Adam, and I don’t say that lightly. I’ve never met anyone quite like him. Before I met him, I didn’t even know someone like him could exist.
He’s sweet, kind, intelligent, and any girl would be lucky to have him.
Most importantly, though, he makes me feel like I can be myself around him and he hasn’t hesitated once to prioritize William and me over his work. He’s been spending all his free time here.
Still, he’s not perfect. Nobody is.
But I didn’t expect him to be so clueless about babies. I mean, I used to be like that just two short years ago. Sawyer, too. But I guess I’ve forgotten how big the learning curve really is.
“I’m sorry,” Adam says as he takes a seat next to me. “I should’ve taken the toy away from the crib before I started working on it, but it didn’t occur to me before that it could slip out of my hands.”
“I know. I know you didn’t mean to startle William awake. You just need to be more careful,” I say.
Even though I can be too protective when it comes to William, I can’t bring myself to get mad at Adam.
He’s always so apologetic and he’s always asking me what he can do better, on top of doing a lot of reading on parenting websites. So, you know, he’s trying.
That said, I know this is not the first time or the last time he’ll ever a parenting mistake. Like last week, for example, he just left a pair of scissors lying around on the coffee table, seemingly unaware that William could grab it and hurt himself.
“Yeah. I’m trying,” he says.
“I know. It takes time. There’s no way around that.”
“I wish there was. I love William, and I don’t want to put him in harm’s way.”
“It doesn’t come naturally to a lot of people,” I say. “I can see you care about William, but fitting a child into your life isn’t going to happen just like that.
“When I was pregnant with William, I read a bunch of parenting books. I already knew how to keep a baby alive from my time in the maternity ward, but I wanted to make sure I was giving William the best life I could provide.”
Adam gazes at me with eyes full of affection. “You’re an amazing mom, and that’s one of the reasons why I love you.”
“You . . .” I pause as I let his words sink in. “You love me?”
“I do,” he says without any hint of hesitation.
“Um, I . . .” My sentence hangs in the air as I fumble for the right thing to say. A few seconds pass, and I scold myself in my head for starting to speak in the first place. Obviously, I should’ve stayed quiet.
“You don’t have to say anything back,” Adam says. “I just want you to know that.”
My heart’s beating fast. I’m glad Adam’s letting me off the hook because I’m not prepared for that conversation.
“I’m sorry,” I say. “I just . . . I haven’t . . .”
“Don’t worry about it,” he says, smiling. “I don’t want to put any pressure on you. I just want you to know how I feel.”
A smile plays on my lips. “Thank you for telling me. It makes me happy to hear that. Really. I just—”
“You don’t have to give me a reason. It’s okay, Katie.”
“No, I just want to say that . . . I really like having you around, and not just because you obviously care about William,” I say. “You make me happy.”
Adam’s smile spreads wide and grows into a big, ear-to-ear grin. “You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear that.”
The corners of my lips pull up into a smile. He means it; I can tell. And it makes me even happier.
“Maybe I just need a little more time,” I say.
“Take all the time you need, kitten.” Adam puts his hand on my head, pulls me close, and plants a kiss on my forehead.
Katie
I never thought I’d ever say this, but . . . It’s kind of nice to do a little deep cleaning around the house.
Normally, I always have to clean with William in the house and often in the same room as me. That basically means that I clean some things up, but William messes some other things up. In the end, the house is no cleaner than it was when I started.
But
today, Adam’s offered to take William out for a short drive around the neighborhood, just to get him out of my hair for a bit.
I was hesitant at first because of his track record with being clumsy or careless around William, but Adam insisted he was going to be super attentive. Also, William does like car rides; they calm him down and often put him to sleep.
Besides, Adam’s been reading all the books I recommended, and he’s even been listening to audiobooks on his morning drive to work and afternoon drive to my place.
So, before letting Adam drive away with William, I installed the car seat myself and placed a bunch of toys for William to play with. I also put a bag with some diapers and clothes on the backseat, just in case, although Adam’s still struggling with changing William.
I told Adam to come back in half an hour, max, and to come home as soon as William starts crying or screaming. It’s only thirty minutes. It’s probably going to be fine.
I check the clock hanging on the wall. I’ve already cleaned the stove and the kitchen sink, and there are a few more minutes left. I forget how easy and quick things can be when I don’t have to split my attention.
People say women are better at multi-tasking. I’m pretty sure that’s a skill developed out of necessity. In pre-historic times, Oogha the ape-woman probably also had to watch her little one while she swept her cave with palm fronds, and that’s how I can do pretty much the same thing.
This is nice. It’s been so long since I even had the space in my brain to think about something other than what’s immediate, what’s here and now.
Maybe letting Adam babysit William once in a while isn’t such a bad idea after all . . .
Adam
Ah, damn it.
I stare with disbelief at the big, yellow Labrador taking a nap on the pavement. I rev the engine, but he doesn’t budge.
The dog looks old and tired; it’s possible he’s got hearing problems. Or dead.
Obviously, I can’t just honk to test my theory.
I glance at the backseat. William’s sleeping soundly, his breathing deep and regular. Katie was right; after being strapped into his car seat, William dozes off pretty much immediately.
He’s just so adorable with his little hands clenching and relaxing. I wonder what he’s dreaming of.
Turning my attention back to the dog, I realize I have to get out of the car and physically move that dog away. This is a quiet residential street, but he still shouldn’t be sleeping there, especially if he’s got low awareness of his surroundings.
I take another glance at William. He’s safe there, right? I keep second-guessing myself because I keep making silly mistakes around William. Maybe I shouldn’t have suggested this car ride in the first place.
But William’s strapped in—Katie even did that herself, so I’m sure it was done right.
He’ll be fine. This is going to take me one minute.
I step out of the car and approach the furry canine sleeping soundly, right in front of my car. He’s breathing, which means he’s alive. Good.
“Hey, buddy.” I crouch down and touch the dog on the head.
He turns to look at me with sage, unhurried eyes.
“You can’t sleep here, man. Someone’s going to hit you, sooner or later. Where’s your home?”
I know the dog can’t understand me, much less answer me, but I don’t know what else to do. He’s a big dog and he’s not budging. I could try to prod and push, but he could turn aggressive.
Seriously, who lets their old dog roam outside on its own?
“Adam!” I hear Sawyer’s familiar voice. “Your car!”
I turn toward the source of the voice and find Sawyer on the sidewalk, rushing in my direction in his running gear.
“Hey, Sawyer!” I wave at him.
“Your car!” he points behind me, his face frantic.
I finally look behind me, and . . .
What the fuck?
My car’s already about five yards away and only sliding further away. And William’s still inside.
Shit.
I race toward the car. As the wind blows in my hair, I notice the street does have a slight slope. Why didn’t I see it before? Fuck!
If I don’t stop it in time, the car will hit that green SUV. It’s parked in front of a house on a street that runs perpendicular to this one.
Luckily, my car’s not rolling backward too quickly. I grab the door handle and pull. But with the car sliding back and me sprinting to match its speed, it’s not an easy task.
Wham!
My car finally stops.
And I haven’t even gotten inside yet.
Fuck.
I hope William’s okay.
I yank on the door handle and it finally swings open.
Immediately, I hear William crying in the backseat. Shit, I’m so sorry, little guy.
I jump into the driver’s seat. Yep. It was in Neutral instead of Park like I thought. I’m such a genius.
I quickly fix the problem, although obviously it’s too late now. There’s a car behind us that practically serves as the brake.
“William, you’re okay now. It’s okay. Everything’s okay.” I twist in my seat and reach back to rub his knees.
We’re still stopped in the middle of the street, although there are only parked cars around us. I should get my car parked too so I can comfort him and calm him down. I’d hate for Katie to see William in this state.
William must be scared shitless. Come to think of it, I wouldn’t be surprised if he literally shit his pants (or diaper).
But, at least he’s okay, even if my car’s going to have to spend a few nights (or weeks) at some garage.
I heave a sigh of relief and then another. I need at least a hundred more deep breaths.
But with Sawyer approaching my car, there’s no time for that.
“What the fuck, man?” Sawyer asks. “William was in there the whole time?”
“Yeah,” I admit.
“What were you thinking?” he asks as he pulls the back door open and climbs into the car. He rubs William’s head and shoulders. “Don’t cry, William.”
William looks up at Sawyer, but tears continue to roll down his soft, baby cheeks as he sobs.
“That was fun, right?” Sawyer asks. “Like a roller coaster ride. You don’t know what that is now, but you’re going to love it in the future.”
With Sawyer in the car to tend to William, I step outside.
A woman has emerged from the house in front of which the green SUV was parked. Her mouth is open in surprise as she rushes out to check the damage.
She was probably just planning to have a quiet day at home, judging from the bright-pink rollers in her hair.
I give her my business card and insurance details as she snaps some pictures with her phone.
“Do you mind if we leave the police out of it?” I ask. “My baby’s crying in the car and he needs to get home.”
She appraises me suspiciously, but her demeanour changes when William lets out a particularly loud scream.
“I promise you, I’m going to sort this out and cover all the costs of fixing your car. I just need to take my son home.”
The woman takes a close look at my business card. “Adam Wright?” She stares at me. “You’re Adam Wright?”
“Yes.” I give her a polite smile. I’ve been featured on business magazines and newspapers a few times.
“That’s why you look familiar. I didn’t know you had a baby.”
“Not many people do,” I say. Most of my media coverage has been centered around my work, so there’s no reason for some random person on the street to know much about my personal life.
The woman pauses to think. “Okay, take your son home. He sounds like he needs his mom.”
“Thank you. You won’t regret it. If there’s any problems with insurance, my number’s on the card. I’ll personally make sure everything gets resolved.” I let out a relieved exhale.
I get into the d
river’s seat and look back at Sawyer and William.
William’s no longer crying, but he’s still gasping for breath.
“Is he okay?” I ask. “Looks like he’s having trouble breathing.”
“He’s fine. He was just sobbing, and he’s still shocked. We should probably take him home now,” Sawyer says.
So, in silence, I drive home. In the backseat, William continues to sniffle while Sawyer tries to entertain him.
What’s Sawyer going to tell Katie? And how will she react?
Katie
It’s been a while since I had time to listen to an audiobook, especially while I vacuum the floor.
If William were around, I wouldn’t be doing this. I’d be too afraid I might miss it if he called out to me.
Noise levels notwithstanding, I haven’t been able to fit in much time for entertainment in general anyway, unless I count those mind-numbing hours I spend sitting in front of the TV with William, watching and re-watching Caillou.
I jump when something touches my shoulder.
Turning around with alarm, I see Sawyer holding a sleepy William.
“Hey, you guys are back,” I shout cheerfully over the sound of the vacuum cleaner.
I’m in a good mood after a productive—I check my watch—hour. I thought they were only going to be gone for half an hour.
But it doesn’t matter. I’m just happy to have done a bunch of chores. And now, I get to see William again. Maybe we should to this more often.
“I had no idea you were going to join them, Sawyer.” I smile as I pull off my earphones, but Sawyer maintains a grim facial expression.
“What’s wrong?” I turn off the vacuum.
“What’s wrong?” Sawyer repeats. “There was an accident; that’s what’s wrong.”
“What do you mean, accident?” I ask, my heart stopping as I drop the vacuum handle and the plastic tube on the floor. “Is William okay?”
My heart stops as I reach out to William and start inspecting his little body for injuries.
I check his limbs and lift up his shirt, my fingers shaking. I keep expecting to see a big, red, gaping gash somewhere hidden, somewhere Sawyer missed.
