by Lucy Gordon;Sarah Morgan;Robyn Donald;Lucy Monroe;Lee Wilkinson;Kate Walker
‘If I didn’t it’s no fault of hers. Hetta wants me to back her in a modelling career. Or becoming a pop star. I don’t think it matters as long as I come across with the necessary.’
‘Are you going to?’
‘Not a chance. I’ve brought saying ‘Uh-huh!’ in a non-committal voice to a fine art. Mind you, I’ve had years of practice with Grace.’ He gave a wry smile. ‘It was fun. I’d forgotten about fun.’
His eyes were shining. I smiled back, loving to see him like that.
‘Goodnight, Jack,’ I said.
‘Goodnight, Della.’
He rose from the sofa and half turned away, then swung around and grasped hold of me without warning, pulled me against him and kissed me hard.
His arms were very tight around me, so that I couldn’t clasp him back even if I’d been able to think clearly. I had nothing to do but stand there and be kissed, very thoroughly.
Now I knew how much I’d wanted to be kissed. His lips felt so good on mine. I’d missed him so much.
Then, as suddenly as it had begun, it was over.
‘Goodnight,’ he said breathlessly, and vanished.
I stood there for a while, trying to calm my nerves, wondering what was happening to me.
Chapter Twelve
Jack’s Story
I USED a private detective to find out all about Bentley Cunningham, the man whose wife had lost the diamond bracelet.
‘He’s like a bit of theatre scenery,’ the detective told me after he’d rooted around a bit. ‘Looks good from the front but it’s all one-dimensional, there’s nothing behind. A breath of the wrong financial wind could blow him flat. He inherited his company from his father and he’s let most of it slip through his fingers. His wife has no idea. She still thinks he’s a big success, so he has to keep up the pretence. That bracelet was a way of fooling her, but he had to take out an expensive loan to buy it. And it wasn’t insured, so they got very upset when they thought it had gone for good.’
His company made machine tools and was situated near the Thames. As soon as I approached it I could see the signs that said he needed a friendly investor badly.
When I introduced myself I was glad to see he knew my name. That would make it a lot easier.
What wasn’t easy was actually doing what I intended. It had been simple to plan it inside my head, but this was reality, where I had to get it right first time, and I was nervous.
That’s right. Bully Jack was going to do a bit of manipulating, and he was nervous because it mattered more than anything had mattered in his life.
I’d spent sleepless nights thinking of my darling going back to jail. In the early hours I’d made idiotic plans. I would take her and Grandad and we would vanish, spending the rest of our lives on a barge, cruising the waterways. They would look for us in vain.
Anything was better than seeing her suffer for even a few minutes, let alone a few months.
Approaching Cunningham meant violating every principle I had. But I was discovering what principles were really for. They were for ditching when you found out what mattered most to you. Della mattered more than anything or anyone, and to hell with principles.
So, for the first time ever, I indulged in the kind of behaviour for which Bully Jack was already famous.
Not that there was any bullying needed. Poor Cunningham was a decent little man who was out of his depth. When he heard my proposal he thought Christmas had come. I ended up poorer, he ended up richer and beaming with relief. And Della ended up safe.
As soon as I was out of there I called Wendell.
‘I want you to handle this investment as well as looking after Della,’ I said. ‘Then you can see that they’re properly co-ordinated.’
He agreed to call Cunningham at once, then the police.
As I returned to the flat I pictured Della’s face when she heard the news, but it was strangely difficult. Her relief was easy to imagine. It was the bit afterwards that caused me trouble. How would she be? Awkward? Embarrassed? Even a little hostile? I could imagine anything these days. I didn’t really know who she was.
It made no difference. Whoever she turned out to be, she’d got under my skin and into my heart, and she was there for life. But I didn’t know what she felt about anything, especially me. She’d been very quick to assure me that she had no ‘illusions’ about our love reviving. But was that her way of putting me at ease? Or of saying it was really over? I was about to find out.
I entered the apartment full of anticipation and trepidation in equal measure, but it was an anticlimax. Only Grandad was there.
‘What have you been up to?’ he asked as soon as he saw my face. I was still partly in a state of shock.
‘Bribery and corruption,’ I said slowly.
‘Good for you,’ he said at once. ‘Any use?’
‘Oh, yes. The charges are going to be dropped.’
He gave a yelp of glee and began to dance around like a little kid, carolling tunelessly.
‘Where is she?’ I asked.
‘Doing a bit of shopping. But she only just went, so she might be a couple of hours.’
The thought of waiting there for two hours suddenly made my stomach churn. I needed to be doing something as the most important moment of my life drew near.
‘I have to go,’ I said. ‘I’ll be back later. Bye, Nick.’
‘What did you call me?’
‘Er—Grandad. See ya!’
I went to my office, to be met by the news that Grace was waiting for me.
I found her sitting in a chair by the window. I saw her before she saw me, and caught a look of misery on her face that she normally hid. As soon as she glanced up the old look was back. It was armoured and guarded for war, but I wasn’t fooled now. I was remembering what Della had told me about her.
‘I came because it seems the only way to see you,’ she said curtly. ‘You’re never home and you’re always busy.’
‘I’m not too busy for you,’ I said, sitting beside her. ‘I’m glad you’re here, because I’ve got a lot to tell you.’
‘I can imagine. I heard about your party for your low-life friends. I’m not surprised I was excluded from that. All you think about now is how to make life easy for your little crook.’
‘She’s not a crook. The charges have been dropped.’
‘I suppose you did that?’
‘Yes, I did it.’
‘May I ask how?’
‘They were dropped because she’s innocent. She always was.’
She didn’t answer and I took her hands. ‘Gracie, come on—’
She tried to snatch her hands away. ‘Don’t call me Gracie.’
I kept hold. ‘I’ll call you Gracie if I want to. It’s what I used to call you, remember? When I was a boy?’
‘That was a long time ago.’
‘Not that long. You called me Jacko and I called you Gracie. We were happy then.’
I could see that the memory had softened her a little, but she wasn’t going to give in too easily.
‘We’re not those people any more.’
‘Yes, we are,’ I insisted. ‘That was our past. Ours. Yours and mine. And nobody else can ever share it or know about it.’
She looked at me.
‘Not even Della?’
‘Not even Della,’ I said, knowing I had to conceal how much Della had contributed to this moment. ‘You were a second mother to me, and nobody else knows what that means. I miss it, Gracie. I miss how close we were. Don’t you?’
‘Yes,’ she whispered, holding onto my hands now. ‘But you grew up and went away.’
‘You used to say I’d never grow up, and you were right. I’m still Jacko inside, and I always will be. Only to you, of course. I wouldn’t let anyone else call me that.’
She smiled hesitantly. ‘Jacko,’ she said.
I drew her to her feet.
‘Come on, I’m taking you to lunch. Things are happening, and I want you to be the first to know a
bout them.’
I told my secretary to hold all calls, and we went out to the Ritz. It was a long lunch, and a happy one. It was years since we had felt so close. I told her all about my future plans, and although I could see she was shocked she didn’t make an issue of it. Near the end of lunch I slipped out to call Harry Oxton.
Grace didn’t seem surprised when he turned up to escort her home. She gave me a smile I hadn’t seen for years and said significantly, ‘I see Jacko the Joker is still alive.’
‘Good grief!’ I exclaimed. ‘That was one of your names for me too.’
‘Or sometimes Jumping Jacko.’
‘Yes, I remember now. Those names were truer than Bully Jack ever was, and I think they’ll be happier than he ever was.’
‘That all depends on her answer, I suppose?’ Grace said.
‘Yes, and it’s far from certain. Cross your fingers for me, Gracie.’
‘I will. The very best of luck—Jacko.’
We hugged each other tightly, and she went off with Harry.
Now I had the real mountain to climb. I ought to go round there, but I found myself putting it off. There was no hurry. She would know she was safe by now, and that was what mattered.
The truth was that I was scared to face her.
Della’s story
Grandad pounced on me as soon as I got home.
‘You’re in the clear,’ he carolled. ‘They’re dropping the charges.’
‘Where did you hear that?’
‘Jack told me. He was here. He went to see Cunningham and got him to agree.’
‘But how did he do that?’
‘Bribery and corruption, he said. Oops!’ He put his hand to his mouth. ‘He made me promise not to tell you.’
I hardly heard. I was beginning to realise that Jack hadn’t stayed around to tell me the good news himself.
‘Where is he?’ I asked.
‘He said he had to go.’
‘Did he say when he’d be back?’
Grandad shrugged.
Mixed with relief there was a sinking feeling inside me. Jack had done what he promised, but it hadn’t mattered enough to him to tell me himself and see my face. He couldn’t have told me more clearly that I was in the past.
All that day I was sure he’d call me, but the phone stayed silent. Didn’t he even want to hear about my joy? Didn’t he want to bother with me at all?
At last I gave in and called his office.
‘I’m sorry,’ his secretary told me. ‘Mr Bullen said to hold all calls.’
I hung up and sat staring at the phone.
It rang and I seized it up. ‘Jack?’
‘No, it’s Thomas Wendell. Just to keep you up to date with what’s happening. The police have confirmed to me that the case has been dropped, seeing as the Cunninghams have withdrawn the charges.’
‘Because of Mr Bullen?’
‘Oh, yes. He’s been pulling strings like crazy. He’s investing a fortune in that clapped-out firm, and I don’t think he’ll see much of it back. You’ll be getting written confirmation, but you can take it as definite. It’s all over.’
I thanked him politely but I was in a daze. His last words stood out in neon.
It’s all over.
Of course he’d been talking about the case, but there was an ominous second meaning.
It’s all over.
And it was. All over. Jack had done what he’d promised. He’d cleared whatever he’d thought was on his conscience and now he could forget me. In fact he’d started to forget me already.
‘When Jack comes back we’ll have a special celebration meal,’ Grandad said. ‘Beans on toast.’
‘He’s not coming, Grandad, and we should start packing.’
‘Packing? What are you talking about, luv?’
‘He’s helped us out and that’s it. I’m an embarrassment to him.’
‘You mean we’re an embarrassment.’ He looked crestfallen. ‘Is that why he keeps getting my name wrong?’
I didn’t answer. I was too preoccupied to hear this properly, or consider the implications.
It suddenly seemed terrible to be here, where we had no right to be, and I couldn’t wait to get out.
I had to write to him, and for some reason this letter was harder than the other one. I told him how grateful I was, thanked him, and promised to be no further trouble to him.
When I read it over I was thoroughly dissatisfied with it, but I knew I couldn’t do any better.
We packed up quickly and went out into the street. A few minutes’ walk brought us to the nearest tube station, and an hour later we were entering our own little home.
Grandad went to bed early. I sat up late, waiting for the phone to ring. Of course it didn’t. It was early light when I went upstairs and fell into a doze. It lasted on and off until the dawn, when I was awoken by the sound of someone banging on the front door.
I threw the window open and yelled, ‘Oi, I don’t know what you—?’
I stopped at the sight of Jack’s furious face glaring up at me.
‘Della, you have two seconds to get yourself down here and let me in. Then I’m breaking the door down.’
I was still pulling on my dressing gown as I opened the front door. He was inside in a moment, still furious.
‘A nice way to behave!’ he snapped. ‘You couldn’t wait around to see me, could you? Once it was settled you couldn’t get out fast enough. Well, that tells me where I stand.’
‘Jack, what—?’
‘I love you—do you understand that? I’m mad about you. I wanted to make everything right for you, and kiss you, and tell you I’d love you for ever. And, not for the first time, you weren’t there.’
‘I wasn’t there because you didn’t want me,’ I said indignantly. ‘You left a message with Grandad, then you walked out and told your secretary not to take my calls. What was I supposed to think?’
He groaned and tore his hair. Now I was getting my second wind I could see that he needed a shave and looked exhausted.
‘I didn’t tell my secretary to refuse your calls,’ he growled. ‘I told her to hold everything.’
‘Yes, because you didn’t want to talk to me.’
He drew a long, exasperated breath and spoke as though restraining himself with difficulty.
‘Now, look, Della, don’t you try to act like the aggrieved party. This is the second time you’ve walked out on me, and enough is enough. Do you know what it felt like for me, going back to the apartment and finding that little note? It felt like the first time, only a hundred times worse. How could you do that to me again?’
‘I’m sorry—I didn’t think of it that way.’
‘That’s it! No more creeping out when I’m not there. This time you face me and say straight out that you don’t love me. Tell me to my face to go to blazes. That would at least be honest.’
‘How dare you say I don’t love you?’ I yelled. ‘Why do you think everything happened this way?’
‘I don’t know why!’ he yelled back. ‘I don’t know anything about you because you won’t let me. Even now, when I’ve met your family, you’re still keeping yourself hidden in the ways that matter. If you want to hide from me for ever, at least say so.’
‘I don’t want to hide from you.’
‘Then what are you doing here?’
‘I—I thought—I don’t know what I’m doing here. It seemed right at the time.’
‘And now?’ He was looking at me intently.
‘Now I’m confused about everything. Why didn’t you tell me about Mr Cunningham yourself?’
‘I lost my nerve. Della, why are you looking at me like that?’
I suppose I was looking strange, because belatedly something had just dawned on me.
‘You said you loved me?’ I said.
‘Yes, I did. Several minutes ago. It took time for that to register.’
He spoke grumpily but he wasn’t angry any more. Nor was I.
‘H
aven’t you got anything to tell me?’ he asked.
‘I thought you were embarrassed. I thought—’
‘No, no.’ He stopped me with a finger over my lips. ‘Those aren’t the right words.’
‘What are the right words?’
‘You know them.’
I smiled at him. Inside I was smiling all over. ‘I love you, Jack.’
He gave a yell of triumph. ‘Those are the right words!’
I don’t know if he grabbed me or I grabbed him, but for a long time nobody said any words at all. And when we came up for air Grandad was in the kitchen, making tea.
‘You two took your time,’ he said as he poured for us. ‘Is it on now? Or are you just waiting for something else to misunderstand each other about?’
‘It’s all on now,’ Jack said, watching me with a warmth in his eyes that seemed to reach out and enfold me. ‘It’s on for life. Isn’t it?’
I nodded. ‘For life.’
‘I wanted to tell you everything myself.’
‘Including the bribery and corruption?’
‘I guess I’m just one of the family. But I don’t mean to make a career of it. It was just the once, for you. And I only left a message so that you should know as soon as possible. When I got back to the office I found Gracie there. So I took her to lunch and made everything right between us—the way you said.’
‘I said?’
‘You gave me the clue about how lonely she was. I followed that up, and you were right. It made it easy to tell her that I’m leaving the firm for a while.’
‘What? But it’s your firm. How can you leave it?’
‘I’ll become a sleeping partner. Peter can run things. Maybe in a couple of years I’ll go back, but I have other things I want to do first—if you agree.’
‘Tell me about the other things,’ I said, but I thought I knew the answer.
Grandad refilled his cup and Jack said absently, ‘Thanks, Nick.’
‘Why do you keep calling me Nick? Who’s Nick?’
Jack gave the grin I loved. ‘I’ll tell you that when we’re on our way.’
‘Are we going somewhere?’ Grandad asked.
