“I care very much,” her father began, “but I assure you, everything will be just fine. He didn’t strike you back after you attacked him.” Malcolm opened his mouth to protest, but her father shook his head. “Yes, you did. You struck him. He stopped by today to see Melissa. That means a part of him cares enough to smooth over some of the damage he’s done with the scandal.”
“You’re giving him far too much credit,” she argued.
“On the contrary, I understand him perfectly.” Her father offered her another pat on her shoulder then helped her to her feet. “Now, why don’t you wash up and take a nap? Things will be better when you wake up.”
She doubted it. He’d promised that last night, and when she woke up this morning, she only felt worse. But since she was tired, she decided to do as he suggested. She trudged out of the room and up the stairs, shoulders slouched, feeling as if the weight of the world rested on her shoulders.
How could this be happening to her? Just a couple days ago, everything was going so wonderfully. And now? She tried to stop the tears, but they came anyway. She wiped them with what had to be the ninth handkerchief she’d used up today. She didn’t want to keep crying. Really, she didn’t. But it seemed no matter what, it was impossible to stop.
Lord Toplyn didn’t just ruin her reputation; he ruined her life. How could she spend the rest of her life with someone who’d willingly destroy her life? She loved Lord Waxman, and he loved her. Why would Lord Toplyn want to get in the way of that? All because of money? Because her father happened to be wealthy? Why couldn’t he have picked someone else to destroy?
She reached her bedchamber and pushed the door open. How she was going to miss this room. It was her one safe haven from the rest of the world. No matter how bad things got, she could always come here to find peace. But once she married, Lord Toplyn would be able to come into her bedchamber at any time, and who knew what vile and disgusting things he’d do to her? She gagged but managed to keep the contents in her stomach down. Recalling his kiss was bad enough. Dry, callous lips. Not a bit of warmth in them at all. Not like Lord Waxman’s. But then, Lord Toplyn was no gentleman. He was a cad.
She went over to the basin near her bed and poured water into it. After she washed her face, she took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. An idea came to her. On her wedding day, she’d claim the woman’s time of month was upon her. That would stop him from wanting to come to her bed. No gentleman wanted to be with a lady in that condition. At least she didn’t think so. At any rate, it was worth a try.
Feeling much better, she went to her daybed and fell into a blissful sleep.
***
“I hear Miss Jasper is so devastated by your upcoming marriage, she refuses to attend any more balls.”
Logan stopped drinking brandy at Lord Clement’s ball and turned to face the gentleman who’d taken it upon himself to insult him. He frowned at Roderick. “I should have known you’d find a reason to annoy me.”
“That’s what you get for creating a scandal at my ball,” Roderick said as he poured himself a glass of brandy.
“Are you going to hold this grudge for the rest of your life?”
He shrugged and took a sip. “Maybe.”
“It was just a kiss.” When Roderick stared at him with that typical stoic look of his, he added, “Why don’t you bother the Duke of Ashbourne? He not only kissed Lady Seyton, but he did it in the ballroom, where everyone saw it. At least I kept my kiss outside where only a handful of people saw me.”
“The duke isn’t here.”
He wasn’t? Logan scanned the room. He’d seen Lady Seyton there and just assumed the duke would be with her since they were betrothed now. But as Roderick claimed, the duke was nowhere in sight.
“That means you’re the only one I have to aggravate,” Roderick said.
“How fortunate for me,” Logan muttered under his breath.
“What was that?”
“I was just saying that it’s my good fortune you choose to spend time with me, especially given how you often ignored me in the past.”
“I didn’t ignore you intentionally.”
“No?”
“No. You and I happen to have different interests. There was no reason for us to talk before.”
“So now that I created a scandal at your ball, there’s a reason for us to talk?”
“Only because you insisted on making me a laughingstock.”
“I made you nothing of the sort. You’re naturally laughable.” Logan finished his brandy then set the glass on the table. “As much as I’m enjoying this witty banter, I have more important things to do.”
Then, before Roderick could say anything, Logan darted further into the room, bypassing a group of people. He came up to Lady Seyton who was, predictably, by herself. She never danced, except for one time when he saw her with the Duke of Ashbourne. For all he knew, the two concocted the scandal together.
“Where’s your betrothed?” he asked, not bothering for her to acknowledge him.
“Why do you want to know?” she replied as she kept her focus on the couples who were dancing.
He shrugged. “He hasn’t been at White’s. I thought he might be at your side. Since he made it a point to let us all know how close you two were by kissing you, I thought he wouldn’t let you out of his sight.”
She glanced over at him, the undeniable look of contempt on her face. “I’m my own person. I don’t need anyone, not even one I’m betrothed to, to watch after me.”
“Are you telling me you don’t have a love match then?”
“Because of you, one of my best clients was denied her love match. Does it please you to stand in the way of true love?”
“You mean Miss Jasper?”
“Was there another lady you kissed without permission?”
“I’ll have you know, her father is quite pleased with the match,” he replied.
“Her father was also pleased to hear Lord Waxman was interested in her.”
“Yes, well, her father didn’t seem upset to lose Waxman as a son-in-law.”
She didn’t seem particularly pleased by his response but turned her gaze to the center of the ballroom where one of her female clients was dancing with a gentleman. “It’s difficult enough to be a lady in this society without gentlemen stepping in and ruining your life.”
“Ruining whose life?”
She glanced at him. “Pardon?”
“Are you upset because the duke ended your freedom as a widow, or are you upset because Lord Waxman won’t be marrying Miss Jasper?”
She didn’t answer him for a long moment, but by the way she gritted her teeth, he could tell she was fighting back a retort. Most likely, she was worried she might somehow damage her reputation by saying something unladylike. After she released her breath, she gestured to someone at the edge of the ballroom. “Just look at him.”
Despite his better judgment, he obeyed and saw the dashing Lord Waxman slumped in a chair, looking as if the entire world had somehow betrayed him.
“He loved her,” Lady Seyton said, bringing his attention back to her. “I don’t often have a client who finds a gentleman who loves her. He’s one of the kindest, noblest gentlemen in all of London. People would have envied their marriage. It’s unfortunate you had to pick Miss Jasper when any number of ladies could have satisfied whatever it was that you were looking for.”
“Money, my lady. That is what I was looking for. Because you and the duke deceived me, I had to find a lady, and who better than one who’d benefit me financially?”
“No one told you to make that silly wager against the duke at White’s.”
“If he hadn’t kissed you at Lord Roderick’s ball, I would have won that wager.”
“You think I wanted him to kiss me?”
“You obviously enjoyed his company.”
“He was my client,” she pointed out. “I enjoy the company of everyone I instruct.”
“Yes, but you enjoyed his more than the
others. I saw you with him.”
She shook her head. “You see things that aren’t there.”
He thought about arguing with her but figured it was pointless. So she wasn’t going to admit she had feelings for the duke. It wasn’t his problem. He was doing well just to concentrate on his own concerns.
The music came to an end, and he wished her a pleasant evening before he left her. He’d been to enough balls to know she often talked to her clients between dances. No doubt, she’d like to do so now. Even if Miss Jasper and the duke were no longer under her care, she had others who were.
He debated staying for a while longer. The brandy was good, and he couldn’t afford such quality until his marriage. But there was really no one he could talk to. Lord Davenport was at home with his wife, who was expecting a child any day now. And though Logan wasn’t happy with the duke, he had enjoyed talking to him. Sure, the duke was unnecessarily serious, but he at least took the time to engage in a conversation with him.
Logan hadn’t stopped to consider it before, but there wasn’t one single person in London, besides Melissa’s father, who genuinely liked him. At least in the country, he had his brother, sisters, and mother. But mothers had to love their children. It was their duty. So that left his brother, and on some days, he couldn’t be sure if his brother even recognized him. As for his sisters, all little sisters probably adored their older brothers.
With a glance at his pocket watch, he figured it was late enough to go home. The brandy relaxed him enough where he should be able to sleep soundly. Decision made, he slipped the watch back in his pocket and left the ballroom.
Chapter Five
It took all of Melissa’s willpower to force back her tears as Lord Waxman entered the drawing room the next afternoon. She knew she’d have to explain what happened at some point, but she’d chosen to delay seeing him for as long as possible. No matter how long she waited, she doubted it’d ease the heartache. If anything, waiting might have just made it worse.
She clenched the handkerchief in her hand and turned from the window, so she could face the earl. She was supposed to marry him. They were going to have children together. They were going to be happy. Who knew her entire future could change with one single kiss?
“Thank you for coming by to see me,” she said then cleared her throat.
Glancing at the tea on the table between the chairs and the settee, she wondered if she should offer it. No. There was no point. This wasn’t a pleasant conversation. The sooner it was done, the better.
“I know the kiss wasn’t your doing,” Lord Waxman told her, his tone gentle.
What a contrast he was to Lord Toplyn. She swallowed and dabbed her eyes. “I’m sorry. I should have run from him as soon as I saw him.”
“From what I heard, everything happened so fast, you didn’t have the chance.”
Maybe. Truth be told, the whole thing was a blur. She couldn’t remember exactly how it all occurred. One moment she was standing in front of her carriage, and the next, everything went black. “If I had any idea Lord Toplyn was going to kiss me, I would have made sure he couldn’t.”
“I know.”
He approached her and took her hands in his, his tender eyes gazing into hers, and for a moment, she was taken back to a few short days ago when nothing was preventing them from being together. If only she could go back in time and make everything right. He lowered his head, and she closed her eyes in anticipation of the kiss. His lips were so warm and tender. Just as he’d always been to her.
He raised his head and squeezed her hands. “I had to give you one last kiss before we said good-bye.”
Her eyes filled with tears. “I shall always cherish its memory, just as I’ll cherish the memory of you.”
“And I’ll always cherish the memories of the times we shared.” He brought her hands to his lips and kissed them. “I don’t hold any ill will against you. It’s not your fault this has happened. Like any lady, you were defenseless against the wiles of the devil.”
“Ah, not even married and the love of my life is already off kissing other gentlemen,” came the voice of the one who’d ruined her life.
Frowning, she peered around Lord Waxman and saw Lord Toplyn leaning against the doorway, his arms crossed, his eyebrows raised as if in amusement. “I’m not the love of your life,” she snapped.
Lord Waxman let go of her hands and turned to face him. “I was only saying good-bye.”
“Yes, I saw,” Lord Toplyn replied. “The devil is a rather crafty and intelligent creature, Waxman. I don’t think you were trying to compliment me just now, but part of me is rather pleased by your comment.”
“It wasn’t a compliment, I assure you,” Lord Waxman said. “My only hope is that you’re good to her.” He glanced at Melissa. “A flower needs to be cherished in order to bloom.”
Melissa’s heartbeat picked up at his words, but Lord Toplyn didn’t share the same enthusiasm for Lord Waxman’s words since he snorted.
“A flower needs to be cherished,” Lord Toplyn mumbled as he crossed the room and picked up the decanter from the desk. “A flower needs lots of space, sunlight and water to bloom. You, my lord,” he shot a pointed look at Lord Waxman, “are depriving her of that space.”
Face turning red, Lord Waxman stepped away from Melissa. She wished he would stay by her side and never leave. But she knew it couldn’t be. She was betrothed to Lord Toplyn now, and there was no changing it.
“Miss Jasper will be just fine with me,” Lord Toplyn continued, pouring brandy into his glass. “I’ll be sure to let her out for walks where she can get plenty of sunlight and space, and as for rain, she does enough crying so there’s no problems with getting plenty of moisture.”
“You are a foul beast,” Melissa hissed. “I will never be happy with you.”
“You mustn’t say things to upset her,” Lord Waxman told Lord Toplyn. “She’s a lady, and ladies are delicate.”
“Delicate?” Lord Toplyn chuckled. “My lord, I have a mother who is every bit a lady, but she’s far from delicate. The lady did her share of discipline when she was raising me and my siblings. Besides that, she was stronger than my father ever was. Not physically strong, mind you, but she was strong up here where it counts.” He tapped his head. “And here.” He tapped his heart.
“A lady who raised you would have to be,” Melissa muttered, doing her best not to tear up. But even so, her eyes filled with them anyway. Why couldn’t she get her emotions under control when it came to Lord Toplyn? He was going to be the end of her.
Lord Waxman walked over to him. “I must insist that you be a gentleman around Miss Jasper.”
“Do you really expect a devil to be a gentleman?” Lord Toplyn asked with a smirk.
“I expect you to keep your wickedness to yourself.”
“And what fun would that be?” With a shake of his head, Lord Toplyn bypassed Lord Waxman and walked over to her. “If I wasn’t wicked, I’d bore the poor lady.” He slipped his arm around her waist. “I promise to be a lot more exciting than you’d ever be, Waxman.”
Cringing, she moved away from him. “You’re wicked indeed.”
“All gentlemen are wicked at heart, my dear,” Lord Toplyn said then glanced at Lord Waxman. “A gentleman who kisses a lady who’s betrothed isn’t exactly a saint.”
“It was a good-bye kiss,” Lord Waxman replied. “The purest of all kisses.”
He rolled his eyes. “If you say so.” Then he drank more of his brandy.
“My deepest sympathies, Miss Jasper,” Lord Waxman said, once again meeting her gaze. “In another lifetime, it would have been perfect.” He bowed then headed out of the room.
“In another lifetime, it would have been perfect,” Lord Toplyn imitated in a high-pitched voice. He went over to the table and set the glass down. “Where does he come up with these stupid sentiments?”
“They’re not stupid.”
“No?”
“No. They’re quite lovely.�
� She brushed more tears away as she watched Lord Waxman leave the townhouse. There went the best she could have had.
“They’re stupid.” Lord Toplyn returned to her. “He’d bore you.”
“He would not.”
“He would. I know his type. He thinks ladies should spend all day playing music or painting pictures or taking walks.”
“And what’s wrong with that?”
“Nothing, if you don’t mind wasting your life away. My mother is no wallflower, Melissa. She’s seen the world, she had a hand in writing some operas under a gentleman’s name, and she designed half the improvements at the estate. She isn’t one to wait for things to happen. She finds what she wants and takes it. That, my dear, is how a lady blooms.”
“Since she’s able to do all this, why do you need money? It sounds like she has more than enough already.”
“She still stays active, but she can’t do everything she used to after my brother squandered away so much of the money.”
“You don’t seem any different,” she commented.
“I admit I didn’t help matters any by gambling, but I’ve learned my lesson. I’m done with wagers.”
She dabbed her eyes. “One can only hope.”
“Oh, for heaven’s sake. Why don’t you throw the book at me and get it over with? Throw several if it’ll get the crying out of your system.”
“Throwing books at you won’t help. The only thing that’ll help me is if you let me out of the marriage so I don’t have to endure being with you for the rest of my life.”
But as she suspected, he wasn’t even going to consider the option. She saw the refusal in his eyes as he shook his head.
“Why not?” she demanded.
“Because the Ton knows about us. We have to get married. There’s no getting out of it.”
“Nonsense. There’s always a way out of a marriage.”
He studied her for a moment, and she actually believed he was considering it until he spoke. “If you think Lord Waxman would make you happy, you’re mistaken.”
Ruined by the Earl (Marriage by Deceit Book 3) Page 4
