by Kelli Walker
“I still feel bad for not taking your phone calls. Or Colton’s,” I said.
“Don’t do that to yourself. You’re going through enough.”
“I think that was the issue, honestly. Sure, I had exams. But I was so emotionally drained from the news stations touting about our relationship and the pictures and dodging the cameras.”
“Do you want to talk about it, Callie?”
I took a sip of my tea and moaned before I sat back into my chair. I turned the mug around against my thigh, feeling the burn of the ceramic against my clothed leg. Did I want to talk about it? There was so much running through my mind. And as a psychological professional, I could dig through most of it.
But as that same professional, I also understood the value of talking with someone.
“You know, I thought things were okay between us,” I said.
I looked up into my father’s face and saw him set his tea down onto the kitchen table.
“And it’s so crazy, because we’ve already put down the down payments for everything. You know, the vineyard in Napa Valley. The caterer. The band for the reception. We already cut those checks for all that stuff. Non-refundable stuff that Matthew said he would foot. It’s insane to me. Then, I wake up one morning and I see pictures of him plastered all over the morning news of him and some red-headed woman kissing and groping on one another. I mean, he’s over in Costa Rica or wherever the hell they were, and I’m in my private dorm room at Stanford making instant coffee!”
My father’s hand came down onto my knee and it forced tears to my eyes.
“We tried to work through it. I tried to get him to go to counseling with me. I even tried dipping into my own personal resources at the college to try and secure us someone to talk to that would be discreet and sign an NDA so they couldn't talk to the media. Or at least be sued if they did. But he kept denying the help. Saying we didn’t need it. He kept pawning it off on me, like his cheating was my fault.”
“What did he say to you, sweetheart?” my father asked.
“He kept saying I grew distant because of my degree. That I wasn’t willing to spend as much time with him as I used to and was using my degree as an excuse to put distance between us. And I thought maybe he had a point. Maybe I was doing that and didn’t realize it. That maybe I was, in part, contributing to all this. So, I told him I would get personal help as opposed to us getting couples counseling if he cut ties with whoever this woman was.”
“Wait, you’ve been seeing a therapist?”
“Yeah. For the past five months. Ever since the first round of pictures dropped at the beginning of the semester.”
“Callie, you know it’s not your fault. You’re not the one that made him cheat.”
“I know that. The professional in me knows that. But, at the time, I don’t know what happened, Dad. So, we had that agreement. It was all to get us back on our feet and back on the right ground because we’d already put down all this money on the wedding,” I said.
I drew in a deep breath before I took another sip of my tea.
“But this last round of photos doesn’t shock me,” I said.
“Why not?” my father asked.
I rose my eyes to him and felt myself melt into my chair from embarrassment.
“I walked in on him and her screwing around in his apartment three weeks ago,” I said.
“You what?” he asked.
“Yeah. Matthew had a rental apartment about a block away from Stanford for us to spend time in. You know, whenever he came in from Los Angeles to visit me. I thought things were going really well between us and I felt bad for having to turn down yet another weekend vacation idea of his, so I figured I could take the vacation to him. I had a basket of food and this new outfit and plans to stay in with him and have this movie marathon. And when I walked in, there they were.”
“Callie, I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”
“That’s when I threw my ring at him. She was screaming and he was screaming and I was… I was really screaming. It bounced off his chest and I told him it was over and that I never wanted to see him again. Ever. And I stormed out and never once looked back.”
“Good for you,” he said.
“I don’t know how the news networks got that information. You know, about the engagement being broken off. I heard it announced on the radio not too long before I pulled in.”
“Knowing Matthew and how starved for attention he can get, he probably leaked it.”
“Or maybe someone in one of my classes noticed I didn’t have my ring on and gossiped to the wrong person. Or maybe it was her. The red-headed bimbo.”
I heard my father chuckle and I shook my head.
“Sorry,” I said.
“No apology necessary. I just don’t hear you cuss often.”
“Trust me, I do it in my head a lot.”
“I can only imagine.”
He smiled at me before he took my hand within his and cupped his other hand over it. I watched him use that gesture many times with my mother over the years when she needed comfort. I sighed and wrapped my fingers around his hands before I closed my eyes, and I felt my father pull me and my chair closer to him.
“Open your eyes, Callie. I want you to look at me when I tell you this.”
My eyes fluttered open, but not before a tear escaped down my cheek. I could’ve sworn I saw my father’s heart break in his eyes at that very moment. Just before he brushed it off my skin.
“Matthew is a load of bullshit,” he said.
A breathless giggle fell from my lips as I shook my head.
“He is. And I should’ve listened to your uncle when he told me he was no good for you.”
“Colt said that?” I asked.
“He did. He didn’t want me giving my permission for Matthew to marry you, but I didn’t listen. I really thought more of Matthew than that, and I’m regretting ever ignoring your uncle’s advice. What I want you to know is that you deserve better than that, Callie. You deserve someone worth your time and your energy. Someone who will support your goals instead of using them as a crutch to blame a relationship’s difficulties on you.”
“I know.”
“Someone will come along who is worth your time, and it will be worth the wait. Your mother was. I was twenty-eight years old when I hired your mother to work for our company that had only been opened for a couple of years. I didn’t even think about telling her I loved her until I was almost thirty, and we didn’t marry until I was almost thirty-three. The right man will come along, Callie. And when he does, you’ll know it.”
“I thought I knew it with Matthew,” I said.
“You also met him when you were young. You were just barely twenty. No one knows love that young, Callie. And Matthew? He’s nothing but a spoiled trust fund baby with too much time on his hands and no work ethic. All he wants is to jet around the world, drain the countries he dips into of their resources, and spend his grandfather’s money.”
“Tell me how you really feel,” I said.
“I can if you want me to.”
I laughed and shook my head before I sighed. I allowed my head to fall to his shoulder and I felt him wrap me up in his loving embrace. I sniffled against his shoulder. I felt the urge to cry again. But with every tear I watched him break a little more, and I didn’t want to hurt him. Not like I was hurting. I didn’t want anyone else to be broken by the trail of selfishness and destruction Matthew left in his wake with his actions. So, I held them back as best as I could.
“I love you, Callie,” my father said.
“I love you, too, Clay. You’re the best damn father any girl could ask for.”
I felt him kiss the top of my head before I crawled into his lap.
“I’m not too old for this, am I?” I asked.
His arms wrapped tighter around me as my legs curled to fit in his lap.
“You’ll always be my little girl, Callie. Whether we’re blood-related or not.”
And as I sat
there on my father’s lap, allowing him to comfort me in ways he always had down through the years, only one thought ran through my mind.
It feels so good to finally be home.
Colton
I came down the stairs after dropping Callie’s stuff in her room and paused. My brother was finally getting a chance to talk with her, and I didn’t want to ruin it. I silently padded into the hallway and leaned against the wall, giving them the space they needed before I began cooking dinner.
But what I heard boiled my blood.
The more I listened to Callie talk, the angrier I became. He accused her of what? Of be absent because of her degree? That didn’t give him a reason to stick his dick in another woman’s body! Just because he felt like he wasn’t getting enough attention from her didn’t give him the right to go and find it somewhere else. Listening to Callie go on about what they experienced and their issues together made me glad that little twerp wasn’t there. Otherwise I’d wrap my hands around his neck and shake him until he begged for mercy.
I stood there silently, trying my best to give them their moment. Then, Callie sniffled. And the sound broke my heart. I knew she wanted to cry. I also knew she was trying to be strong for Clayton. She’d always been that way with him. Ever since her mother died. Cathy’s death broke something in my broke. And in some ways, there were moments when he expected Callie to step up and fill that hole she left. He never blatantly expected that of her. In fact, he probably didn’t even notice he was doing it most of the time.
But Callie was the spitting image of her mother. And I couldn't imagine the pain it must have held for my brother to look into the eyes of the daughter of the woman he loved and be reminded of the tragedy he suffered.
The tragedy we all suffered.
I watched Callie crawl into his lap like she used to do when she was a little girl. All legs and arms and sloping curves as her cheek fell to his chest. I had no idea if this was a moment I was supposed to be witnessing. But, with every passing second I felt as if I was intruding on something I didn’t need to be. I also couldn’t pull my eyes away. I couldn't pull my ears away. If there was anything else to be said, I wanted to know what it was so I could help her. I wanted to know everything that man did so I knew how to comfort her when the time was right.
But watching her crawl into Clayton’s lap and seek out his warmth ignited a spark of jealousy I didn’t deserve to feel.
I crossed my arms over my chest and tucked my hands underneath my armpits. I needed to keep my fucking hands to myself. Hell, I needed to keep my mind to myself. And yet, I couldn't stop it from swirling. From being insanely jealous at a relationship I had no sense being jealous at. Clayton was Callie’s father. He had been ever since he fell in love with her mother. Ever since he adopted her, for fuck’s sake. Of course, Callie would seek out her father in a time like this. If Cathy was still alive, she probably wouldn’t go to either of us with something like this. The point was, I wasn’t even on the radar when it came to comforting a broken heart.
But I wanted to be.
I wanted to be the one wrapping my arms around her. I wanted to be the one whispering into her ear and letting her know things would be all right. I pressed my back into the wall and leaned my head against it. Like I was trying to press myself through it and mold into it. I drew in a deep, silent breath and let it out through my lips, hoping it would settle the raging storm in my gut.
Then, I heard my name.
“Colt.”
I looked over and saw Callie’s eyes hooked with him. I watched her grin as me before she quickly wiped away at her eyes, then her languid form slid from her father’s lap. I pushed myself off the wall and watched as Clayton shot up from the chair and wrapped his arms around her one last time.
But her eyes were on me now.
Not him.
“Are you going to come into the kitchen? Or are you going to keep standing there like a weirdo?” she asked.
“I don’t know. Sometimes weirdos have more fun,” I said.
“Get in here.”
The little smile she afforded me seized my heart. I stepped into the kitchen and walked towards the two of them, then reached my arm out for her. I pulled her into one of our hugs. One of the one-armed hugs that had become a trademark of ours over the years. Her arms slinked around my waist as her cheek fell to my chest, and my lips fell to the top of her head to kiss it. I rubbed her arm, feeling her pull me closer to her and trying to ignore the warmth that spread through my veins when she did.
“It’s going to be okay, Callie. I promise,” I said.
“I know it will, Colt. But it’ll take some time,” she said.
“And in the meantime, if that asshole comes to this out or continues to call you, then I’ll deal with it.”
“Trust me, I know you will,” she said, giggling.
It was the most innocent sound on the face of this planet and my body turned it into something twisted. Her giggle sent shivers down my spine that shot straight to my groin. I couldn't even hug her anymore without wanting more of her. I couldn't even comfort her without my body betraying what I truly wanted.
I tried to ignore it as best as I could while Clayton watched the two of us interact.
“I’m serious, Callie. If Matthew continues to call you and harass you or if he appears at this house for any reason, I’m not too sure I won’t put his ass on the ground myself,” I said.
“Uncle Colt--.”
“I’m serious. It’s one thing for him to do what he did and it’s another thing to try and back you into a corner and make you do something you clearly don’t want to do. Did you make it clear to him that things were over?”
I felt Callie nod against my chest.
“Then that’s all that needs to happen.”
“I agree with my brother on this one,” Clayton said.
“Which part?” Callie asked.
“All of it,” he said.
She let out another giggle and it slammed my heart against my chest.
“In other news, I’ve got your things in your room. Toiletries in your bathroom,” I said.
“Thank you so much, Colt.”
“You’re welcome, Callie.”
She pulled away from me and slipped her arms around my neck, sliding her body to the forefront of mine. And when I wrapped my arms around her, I lost myself. Her breasts pressed into my chest. Her taut body in my arms. It was too much. It was all I could do to keep my cock at bay while I held her like that. My eyes whipped up to my brother and he smiled. A grateful smile that told me he was glad I was there to help him with all this.
If only he knew what my body really wanted.
What my heart really wanted.
“So, what’s for dinner? Dad said you’re cooking,” Callie said.
I wasn’t relieved to release her body, but I knew I had to.
“Well, all I need is a menu to cook. What would the two of you like? Any suggestions, Clay?”
“You know I enjoy everything you cook,” he said.
“Like a tried and true terrible chef,” I said, grinning.
“Oh, come on. That was mean. Dad’s not that bad at cooking,” Callie said.
I looked over at Clay and grinned as his finger came up to point at me.
“Shut up,” he said.
“What?” I asked.
“What’s all this about?” Callie asked.
“If you say anything, I will haunt you for the rest of my days,” Clay said.
“But you already do that. I see you every time I look in the mirror. It’s the curse of being twins,” I said.
“What’s going on? What happened?” Callie asked.
“Can it, Colt,” he said.
“But it’s such a good story. And she hasn’t been home since Christmas,” I said.
“What did you do, Dad? What happened?” Callie asked.
“Well, your father here attempted to make you a birthday cake when you turned twenty-six back in March,” I said.
“Shut up, Colt,” he said.
“You made me a cake?” Callie asked.
“He tried. What he ended up doing was almost burning the house down,” I said.
“Wait, what? Dad, are you okay?” Callie asked.
“I’m fine. Everything’s fine. Colton can shut up now with this story,” he said.
“Oh, I’m only getting started,” I said.
“Well, now I have to know since Dad obviously doesn’t want me to know,” Callie said.
“I came in at just the right time. I mean, smoke was barreling down the hallway. By the time I got to the kitchen, I couldn't hardly breathe,” I said.
“You could’ve killed yourself, Dad!” Callie exclaimed.
“It wasn’t as bad as Colt’s making it out to be,” he said.
“Want to know why he burned everything so badly?” I asked, grinning.
Callie’s eyes panned over to me as Clayton raked his hand down his face and groaned.
“I hate you,” he said.
“Love you too, brother.”
“What did he do?” Callie asked.
“He put alcohol in the cake before putting it in the oven,” I said.
I watched Callie’s face drop before she slowly turned around to face her father.
“Okay. Take your best shot,” Clayton said.
“You did what!?” Callie exclaimed.
I threw my head back and laughed as I leaned my hand against the kitchen island.
“Why did you put alcohol in the cake?” Callie asked.
“Because your favorite liquor is that marshmallow Smirnoff! I figured I could make an alcoholic s’mores cake and bring it to campus for your birthday. I didn’t know the alcohol would fireball my oven when I put it in there,” Clayton said.
“Dad. We’ve been to bars before. They literally set the tops of drinks on fire,” Callie said.
I leaned against the kitchen island and laughed until tears filled my eyes.
“I hate you,” Clayton said.
“Oh, I love you, too,” I said.
“Dad?” Callie asked.
“Yes, lightning bug?”
“Don’t cook ever again,” she said.
