by Jordan Rivet
“Shall we give Judith a minute, Esther?” Simon said.
“Uh, okay, but was there anything else you needed? Manny said—”
“No, I’m sure you have a lot to do,” Judith said, still not looking at them. Her thin shoulders quaked almost imperceptibly. “I’ll see you at dinner.”
Esther and Simon left the bridge without speaking. They walked together toward the plaza. After a few minutes Esther broke the silence.
“I’ve never seen Judith like that.”
“This is hard for her . . . us finding Naomi,” Simon said.
“Because it makes her think of her own family?” Esther recalled the awkwardness as she passed the people waiting for a chance to look for their own loved ones’ names. The raw, heartbreaking envy. “She wishes it was her sister instead of mine?”
“In a manner of speaking,” Simon said. “I think Judith wishes she was your sister, Esther.”
“Huh?”
“Judith has become part of our family in her own way. I think it’s hard to see us leaving her behind for the sake of our real family.”
“Did she say that?”
“No, but I’ve known Judith for a long time. She’s been through a lot, more than you might realize. We haven’t always seen eye to eye, but she’s like a daughter to me. She doesn’t want to let on that she feels that way too.”
Esther didn’t answer. Did Judith really think of Simon and Esther as her family? After everything they’d been through, she was surprised to realize that she understood. She might even miss Judith too.
And speaking of people she considered family, Cally was waiting for them in the plaza.
“You have to let me come with you, Esther!” she shouted, running over to meet them at the bottom of the grand staircase. She skidded to a stop, her red hair flying.
“Sorry, Cally, it’s too dangerous.”
“I’m about to turn seventeen next spring,” Cally said. “I’m basically an adult.”
“Not until you’re eighteen, like Dax,” Esther said.
“What if my mom says I can go?”
“She won’t, and if she did I still wouldn’t allow it.”
“What if Hawthorne says I can go?”
Esther smiled. “Same thing. I won’t allow it.”
“I never get to go on any of the adventures,” Cally said, pushing out her lower lip. She had developed a scattering of freckles on her nose, evidence of increasingly sunny days.
“You need to be around to fix things in the engine room.” Esther reached up to put a hand on her young assistant’s shoulder. Cally was now a full head taller than her. “You did a great job of taking care of the Catalina last time I was gone.”
“But I want to help find your sister!”
“We’ll bring Naomi back here,” Simon said. “Then you can give her the full tour. Can you figure out somewhere for her to stay when we get back? We’re running out of cabin space.”
“I guess so,” Cally grumbled.
“We’ll be counting on you to make her feel welcome,” Simon said.
“Okaaay.” Cally sighed dramatically. “What’s Naomi like anyway?”
Esther and Simon exchanged glances.
“It’s been a long time since we last saw her,” Simon said carefully. “She’s a lot older now.”
“What was she like as a kid then?”
“She loved to read,” Esther said. She chose her words slowly, picking her way through memories long since rusted over. “She always had her nose in a book, and she didn’t like it when I made too much noise or bothered her while she was reading. She was a lot more girly than I was. She even wore dresses to school sometimes.” Naomi had been warm too, Esther remembered. Kind. Esther could always go to her big sister when she had trouble with kids at school or needed help with her homework. For some reason it was hard to put that into words without her voice catching in her throat.
“Did she like school?” Cally asked. “I wish I could go to a real school.”
“Yes,” Simon said, smiling. “She was what we used to call a teacher’s pet. She always knew the answers and got good grades. She hated getting in trouble, even for little things.”
Esther wondered what her sister had made of this new world. And she’d been on land the whole time. It had to have been hard.
As if he’d read her thoughts, Simon said, “We don’t know what she’s had to go through. It must have been difficult no matter how she escaped from San Diego. She might be different than we remember.”
“If it’s her,” Esther said.
Simon hesitated. “Yes, of course. We shouldn’t get our hopes up too high.” He gave a half smile and turned to walk back up the stairs. “I’m going to collect Penelope for dinner. I’ll see you both later.” He limped away, eyebrows drawn together.
“What happens if Naomi doesn’t want to come back to the Catalina?” Cally asked as she and Esther watched him go. “She lives on land! It must be magnificent, better than living on this rusty old ship anyway.” She swept her arms wide, indicating the three levels of the plaza. The old chandelier hanging above them tinkled softly. People milled around, going about their work or leaning against the rails of the upper levels, chatting. It was a familiar scene, the only world Esther had known for a long time.
“It’s more important to be with family,” Esther said. “I’m sure she’ll see it the same way.”
“What if she wants you to stay with her on land instead?” Cally said, panic darting across her face.
“I—”
“What if you never come back?!”
“We’ll be back, Cally. Don’t worry,” Esther said, even though she wasn’t sure if it was true. The Catalina was her home, but she was beginning to realize that its days were numbered. Their life here couldn’t last forever. The purpose of the Lucinda’s voyage was to see if living on land was now better than living at sea. One day it would be time to go back for good.
“Maybe we’ll find a place for all of us to live, and you can come meet us,” Esther said. She brushed a frizzy curl out of Cally’s eyes. “Hey, what do you say we head to the dining hall to get our dinner early, just you and me?”
“Oh, um, I promised to help my mom with something, and then I have to find Dax to . . .” Cally shifted from foot to foot. “I’ll see you later, Esther!” She spun and darted for the opposite side of the plaza, her long limbs swinging. Esther watched her go, shaking her head. She was going to miss Cally very much.
Chapter 6—Farewell
THE CATALINANS THREW A leaving party for the Lucinda’s crew after dinner that night. They gathered in the plaza, filling the space with chatter and warmth. Everyone received a single piece of candy or a slice of sweet dried fruit from a supply they’d acquired at the Amsterdam. The plaza crackled with the crinkling of plastic and foil wrappers, which were duly collected for reuse by a group of children. The brief bursts of sweetness conjured expressions of nostalgia and longing on the faces of the assembly. The sea outside was calm, and they could almost forget they were still drifting in the middle of the ocean.
There was no official agenda for the party. Those staying behind eagerly surrounded the departing crew to wish them well. They put in their last-minute requests for the type of home they wanted the Lucinda’s crew to find: mountain, valley, forest, farm. They called up the long-forgotten features of land, waxing lyrical about the plants, the rocks, the sounds and smells.
Esther answered questions about her sister for as long as she could take it, and then she retreated to the second level of the plaza. She found a table by the balcony railing and settled in to watch the activity. She spotted her father and Penelope deep in conversation beside an old gallery. They were not fighting. That much was clear. As Esther watched, Penelope put a hand on Simon’s cheek and said something, the soft purr of her words lost in the chatter. He took her hand and held it. There was something sweet and sad about the way they looked at each other, no hint of resentment or hurt. Esther remembered wh
at her father had once said about how he understood Penelope and what she was trying to do for her family. Maybe Penelope understood Simon too. She would know when it was time to let him go, at least for a little while.
Reggie and his band had set up their instruments at the center of the plaza beneath the darkened skylight. Under Reggie’s direction, the Catalinans pushed the chairs and café tables to the edges of the space. The band had been working on more upbeat music, expanding their folksy repertoire with the help of a newly acquired saxophone, and Bernadette and Anita had offered to teach a few dance moves to go with the new music. They stood in the middle together, an old woman and a young one, and worked through all the steps they knew in common. Their laughter and enthusiasm was infectious, and soon more people were joining them.
As the music swelled, Bernadette pulled big, burly Dirk out to the dance floor, and he twirled her around, her long white hair swinging loose. Anita meticulously walked each of her partners through the steps, smiling shyly. Zoe danced wildly with everybody except for Luke, who hung around the edges of the dance floor and watched her with a silly grin on his face. Simon and Penelope disappeared before long. Cally sang with the band for the first set, but she too snuck away before the end of the evening to be with Dax before his departure on the Lucinda.
David climbed the staircase to join Esther at her side table overlooking the dancers. He had been busy fielding questions from the Catalinans about the route, the List, and their plans. He dropped into the chair across from her and reached for her hands with a tired smile. They hadn’t had much time to talk since the decision to go after Naomi. Esther thought they were okay again, but she hadn’t had a chance to really thank him for siding with her.
She was opening her mouth to speak when Byron came over to their table.
“Hi, folks, sorry to interrupt.” Byron smiled at Esther, his handlebar mustache twitching, and shook David’s hand. “Had an idea. Might prove useful in light of the route change.”
“Let’s hear it,” David said.
“I got to thinking about the river,” Byron said. “Sailing inland could save you some time in the long run, even though you’re starting further south than planned.” Byron glanced at Esther. “What do you think about bringing another one of the smaller boats with you on the Lucinda in case you need to continue through shallower water?”
“We’re pretty tight on space,” David said. They’d been arranging and rearranging the supplies for their journey like a puzzle. They had packaged up individual sets of provisions in salvaged backpacks and suitcases for the overland part of their trip. Each one contained tightly packed cubes of dried fish and seaweed, jugs of freshwater, which would need to be refilled along the way, and charcoal filters. Realistically, they wouldn’t get far if they couldn’t find uncontaminated water. They had no idea what effects from the volcano might linger in the streams and wells of the continent.
“We have the inflatable life rafts already,” David said, “but to make room on the Lucinda for another boat big enough to carry all twenty-eight of us would mean—”
“Not for everyone,” Byron said. “Just a small team to press on if the mission fails.” He looked at Esther again. “Some people might have a reason to keep going up the river even if the Lucinda’s gotta turn back. That way you won’t be left without any of your life rafts.”
David was silent for a moment. “You’re right,” he said after a while. “Which boat do you have in mind?”
“A little speedboat we picked up from the last cargo giant Esther helped out. They gave her to us as thanks for our assistance. Carries four comfortably enough. She’s durable too, and light.”
“I see where you’re going with this,” David said. “What would we have to move to bring her along?”
“Just stick ’er on deck and tie ’er down good. She’ll add a bit of weight, but with the algae fuel system working as it is, I think Lucinda can take it.”
“Okay. Let’s get to work then.” David started to stand, but Byron waved him back into his seat.
“Naw, you enjoy your final evening. I’ll round up some of the off-duty fishing boys to take care of it. They don’t have to be sharp in the morning.”
“Thanks, Byron. You’re a good man.”
Byron touched his cap with a weathered hand.
“Wait,” Esther said as he turned to go. “Could this boat make it up the whole river? For example, if the Lucinda dropped me off at the mouth and then continued straight up the coast, could I sail it all the way to the lake?” She didn’t look at David.
“Yes, she ought to be able to handle it,” Byron said without hesitation. “You could make the whole river journey by yourself if you chose.”
“Understood,” Esther said. “Thank you, Byron.”
His mustache twitched again, and he headed for the lower decks. Esther knew what Byron was trying to do. He was giving her an out, a way to let the mission proceed as planned without dragging everyone with her. Continuing on in that little boat would mean leaving David and everyone on the Lucinda behind. She wouldn’t be able to get back to the Catalina. But she could get to Naomi, and if she needed to she could do it alone.
“Esther,” David said quietly. She met his eyes and was relieved to see that he didn’t look hurt. Only a little sad. He reached for her hands again. His grip was firm and warm. “Promise me you’ll talk to me before doing anything rash. I know there are things you might have to do. I understand that. But no surprises, okay?”
“Okay. I promise,” Esther said, her heart thrumming painfully in her chest. “And thank you. For everything.”
David brought her hands up to his mouth and left a soft kiss on each palm.
The evening had begun to wind down. Bernadette collapsed into a chair, fanning herself and chuckling. Many of the older Catalinans had gone to bed. Zoe finally took Luke’s hand and dragged him to the dance floor. A few other couples swayed in corners, the fancy steps of the dance forgotten.
Reggie began a new song then, his raspy smoker’s voice caressing the words. It was one of the originals Cally and Anita had written together.
Starlight find a way for me
Find me in the swaying sea
Give me shelter, help me see
Starlight find a place for me
Roll roll roll
Sea of slumber sway with me
Toll toll toll
Bell of thunder play for me
Soul soul soul
Pretty lover help me be
Whole whole whole
Give me cover
Stay with me
Twilight hover over me
Cover me in dying light
Ocean, lover, give me sight
Twilight hide me in the night
A full moon filled the skylight above them, lighting the plaza with a soft radiance. David’s white-blond hair seemed to glow, and shadows from the thick frames of his glasses lined his face.
“Let’s not talk about plans anymore,” he said, standing and pulling Esther to her feet. “Dance with me.”
“I don’t know how,” Esther said.
“Yes, you do.”
David took Esther’s right hand in his and placed her left hand on his shoulder. He curled an arm around her waist and pulled her close. She rested her head on his chest, her ear level with the scar underneath the soft wool of his sweater. She sometimes forgot how tall he was. David moved in slow, rocking steps, and she followed. There was a kind of rhythm to the gentle dance. The music drifted up to them, quieter now, as they relaxed into each other.
Daylight break into the storm
Draw me close into your arms
Moon and stars give stolen glow
Daylight save me when you show
Roll roll roll
Sea of slumber sway with me
Toll toll toll
Bell of thunder play for me
Soul soul soul
Pretty lover help me be
Whole whole whole
&n
bsp; Give me cover
Stay with me
“Do you remember the tango we saw on the Galaxy Mist?” David murmured.
Esther smiled into his shoulder. “We don’t look like that.”
“No, but this is nice. We should dance more often.”
“Yes.”
Wind and rain and death will fight
Lover hold me in the light
Pretty lover stay with me
Make me whole and set me free
Storms may rage and
Ships may break
But your love keeps me
Wide awake
Pretty lover make me whole
Give me shelter from the storm
David held her closer, and Esther let some of the tension run out of her body. Her family would be okay. They could do this. Together.
Reggie stopped singing, and instrumental music floated around the plaza, a formless, soft jazz. It felt quiet and solemn, like the sea.
“What was your family like?” Esther asked after a while. “You don’t talk about them much.”
David traced the calluses on Esther’s right palm, swaying to the music.
“They loved dinner parties,” he said. “They were always inviting over my father’s business associates and their partners. Many of my father’s friends didn’t have kids, but he liked me to be around when we entertained at home. My mother always made me wear a tie, even if there were other kids coming over. I got made fun of for that.”
Esther tried to imagine David as a young boy. She pictured him in miniature, with the same straight posture and clean haircut.
“You know I didn’t have any siblings,” David said, “but I had cousins. My mother was always competing with her brother and sisters. They’d compare whose kids were the brightest or most accomplished or had the best manners.”
“Did that make you feel bad?” Esther asked.
“Just the opposite,” David said. “I got the best grades. I was the best at talking to adults. All those dinner parties paid off, but I got to be pretty arrogant pretty quickly. My cousins hated me.”
