So was she there alone? Feeling pathetically like a stalker, he sat on deck with a beer in one hand, watching her boat. A short time later, the light went out, and it was only Stacey who appeared on deck. She hopped off the boat, her long legs left bare by her shorts, striding toward the marina office, ice bucket in hand. Oh yeah. Now he had an excuse, and by God he would take it. After spending time trying to avoid her, Mason was determined to run into her here where there was no one else they knew, no prying eyes to watch. No husband to be the excuse not to talk to him.
He wanted answers. After nearly two years, he wanted to know what had made her turn from what they had to the jackass she’d married. He prayed to God it had been more than a pedigree dangled in front of her. Hell, he’d have more respect for her if she told him she’d married Winchester for his money.
He nearly changed his mind when he saw her turn from the ice machine. Her shoulders were slumped, as if she had admitted defeat or simply caved in. Before he could say anything, she spotted him standing a few feet away. The evening breeze lifted her hair, which hung loose for once, the tips just brushing the swells of her breasts. It was like watching a set change at a theater production. The narrow shoulders squared, the chin lifted, and her expression cloaked itself in the same haughtiness he’d seen the first day they’d met. But this time was different. This time, Mason knew there was a passionate woman underneath her brittle veneer, a woman who right now was in pain.
“Stacey, how are you?” He asked the usual social kiss-off question, but he wanted to know, didn’t want a throwaway answer.
But it was what he got.
“Fine. Thank you for asking.” She started forward to move past him. “If you’ll excuse me?”
He stepped into her path. “No, I don’t think I will. Excuse you, that is.”
She wouldn’t look him in the eye, which might have been the very reason he noticed the faint circles, like bruises, in the delicate skin below her golden irises.
“Please, Mason,” she whispered, “I can’t take your sniping. Could you…please, could you just not?”
He took another step closer. “I don’t want to…snipe. What’s wrong, honey?”
He watched the muscles in her throat work as she gulped. She raised her free hand to smooth a lock of hair off her face, and he noticed the tremor in her hand.
“Talk to me, Stacey.”
Her lips pressed together, and she shook her head. “I-I can’t, Mason.”
He didn’t want her to go, needed to find some way to keep her near him. “Are you taking your boat out?”
She glanced behind her to where it rocked. This time her chin quivered. “I was supposed to.” Her voice was a whisper again. “I’ve got some logistical issues. Jace was supposed to crew, but something came up at the last minute…” Her voice trailed away. Mason could imagine what had happened, but he bit back his response. She turned a bright, brittle smile on him. “But hey, I still have a great weekend away from the capital.”
“Come with me,” he offered.
She started to shake her head. “It wouldn’t…”
“We’ll do day sails. I’ll come back in tomorrow night. I was going to spend the night anchored in a cove, but we can come back so you can sleep aboard your boat. No strings, Stacey. Just a chance to relax.”
He was tempting her. He could see it in the way her eyes darted longingly to his boat. There was nothing better than feeling the wind and the tilt of the deck.
“She’s fast,” he added. “Faster than Bran’s boat. I’ve beaten him both times he’s challenged me.”
He watched her thumb twisting nervously at her wedding and engagement bands. Finally, she smiled. “I’d like that.”
“Come on over at eight. We’ll spend the day on the water.”
She nodded, said good night and padded back toward her boat. It was only then he noticed she was barefoot. Sexy. It was something out of the norm for the always-correct Stacey Barlow-Barrett Winchester. Maybe the woman he’d made love to was still in there somewhere.
* * * *
She nearly chickened out a dozen times. But in the end she went, because she was a Barlow-Barrett, and she couldn’t resist sailing on a boat whose captain had twice beaten Brandon in a race. No one else in the family could do it, even their father.
She put on her suit, covered it with a polo shirt and shorts, slipped her bare feet into deck shoes and shoved her hair inside a ball cap before slipping on dark glasses. If she kept the sunglasses firmly on her nose then Mason wouldn’t be able to see the circles under her eyes.
Stacey realized as she traversed the distance between their boats she felt freer than she had in the past couple weeks. And then she felt a stab of guilt. She shouldn’t feel free with her husband away. She tried to tell herself it was simply because she would be sailing and it had been such a long time, but in her heart she knew the relief was in being away from both Jace and Justin. Her disappointment the previous evening hadn’t come from the fact her husband would be elsewhere, but that she would be limited in where she could sail without someone to crew, and she hadn’t felt like hiring a stranger. It made her uncomfortable. It seemed like people available to hire were invariably men, and she didn’t want to be on the water for hours with someone she didn’t know. It was like asking to be assaulted.
A gull wheeled overhead, and a few other sailors were preparing to depart for a day out on the waters of the Chesapeake Bay, but Stacey had eyes for only one of them. Mason was on deck, his dark hair lifting in the morning breeze. Feet planted firmly apart, he sipped from a mug of coffee and watched her approach. When she reached the side, he held out a hand to help her aboard.
“Good morning. I didn’t think you’d show.”
He still held onto her hand, and Stacey felt heat. She gulped as warmth flooded her from head to toe. He’d always affected her like this. Why this man? Why not her husband? She pulled her fingers from his, dug them in the pocket of her shorts. “I did almost chicken out,” she admitted. “Several times.”
“But you’re here.”
What to tell him? How much could she admit without feeling like she was betraying Jace and their marriage? Stacey stared out at the water, so calm here in the marina, but she knew out on the bay, it would be much more turbulent. “I needed this time here…sailing.” She turned to look at him again. “Do you ever feel like you’re losing touch with yourself?”
“Yeah.” Mason stuck his hand out. “Come on. Let’s get out on the water. You captain, I’ll crew.”
She shook her head. “No. I’m only a mediocre sailor. You call the shots. I want to see what you can make her do.”
She laughed, feeling suddenly more carefree than she had since…before her engagement. Guilt assailed her. Stacey ducked her head and went to work, doing her best to complete every task he gave her as quickly and thoroughly as possible. Once they were out on the bay, tacking a course southward, Mason grinned at her. “You’re a helluva crewman.”
She grinned back. “I’ve had plenty of experience crewing, first with my dad and sometimes with Brandon.”
“What about your eldest brother?”
“Seth?” Stacey shook her head and laughed. “He’s never sailed for speed. He’s as likely to float around in the middle of the ocean while he daydreams. I never understood that because he was always so serious and driven other than when he went out on his boat.”
Mason glanced sideways at her. “It must be his safety valve, like a pressure cooker. It’s yours too, isn’t it, except you want speed.”
“Yes.”
“You know, I can be an ear if you need to talk.” He kept his eyes on the horizon ahead of them. Stacey watched him, wishing more than anything she could pour it out, but doing so would cross the line, especially with Mason. If he knew… No, she couldn’t go there, even in her thoughts.
“I can’t, Mason. It’s not something I feel comfortable discussing…with anyone.”
His gaze narrowed on her. “Ok
ay. Enjoy the day. I can give you that much. Make yourself comfortable. She can pretty well sail herself until we get to the cove I had in mind. We’ll anchor there and have lunch.”
Stacey nodded before going forward to perch near the bow. She wrapped her arms around her bent knees and simply enjoyed the feel of the wind and the sun on her face. Periodically she had to tuck tendrils of hair the wind had pulled loose from her cap back beneath it, and she enjoyed that too. Jace always wanted her hair sleeked into a French twist or a snug knot at the back of her head. Going with her feelings for a change, Stacey whipped off the cap and let the wind simply blow through her long hair.
She wanted the sun on her skin, and a moment later, she peeled her polo shirt off to reveal the top of her very conservative bikini. She’d leave the shorts on for now, but she already felt her tension ease, which made her wonder at how circumscribed her life had become when simply letting her hair down and showing her bikini top became such a big deal.
* * * *
When she took the cap from her head and shook out her golden blond mane of hair, Mason groped on the shelf in front of him until he found his sunglasses. After slipping them on, he could ogle her to his heart’s content without her knowing it, and most of all without making her uncomfortable. When she crossed her arms and grabbed the hem of her shirt, he felt his groin seize, then begin to pulse. His throat went dry when she pulled her shirt off to reveal the black bikini top she had on underneath. God knew he’d seen skimpier bikinis and he’d seen tops filled to overflowing, but he’d never seen one filled out quite so perfectly for him.
Jace Winchester had to be the biggest freaking idiot in the universe. No way would he leave a wife like Stacey alone on the weekend. In fact, he hadn’t left her alone. She was here with him right now, but damn it, he wasn’t about to cross the line, not when he’d realized her wedding vows actually meant something to her. Too bad the same couldn’t be said… No, he so wasn’t going there. He would simply enjoy the gift he’d been given and try to make sure she was able to do exactly what she’d said she wanted to–get in touch with who she was.
“Want to see what she can do?” he called to Stacey.
She turned her head and laughed. “I’d love to. Does this mean I should hang on?”
Mason grinned. “You got that right.”
He eased the mainsail out to run the boat before the wind. As she gained speed, he glanced at Stacey. Hair blowing into a tangled mass of golden strands, her face was alight with enjoyment. This was a woman he had never seen before. He’d seen more than enough of the buttoned-down Barlow-Barrett lady of the manor and not nearly enough of the tigress she’d become during their sexual encounters. But this woman–laughing, giddy and almost girlish in her enjoyment–was someone Mason didn’t know. He stared now, drinking her in just in case she disappeared, and wondered how he could keep this Stacey around. She was captivating.
As he watched, she made her way back to his side. “Please–may I take the wheel? Just for a few minutes? I want to see what she feels like.”
“Have you ever sailed like this?” he asked, wanting her to try it, but not wanting her to take on too much.
“No.”
“Then why don’t I stand behind you and hold the wheel too, until you get a feel for it.” When she arched a brow, he held up three fingers. “Scout’s honor. I’m not playing you here.”
She stuck her hands on her hips. “Were you ever a scout?”
“No. But believe it or not, Stacey, I do understand honor.”
Her mouth quirked. “I’m beginning to realize.”
She slipped between him and the wheel, her hair fluttering against his cheek as he put his face near hers. This would put his honor to the test. But not for long. In next to no time, she was handling the boat as if she had always done it. Although he knew she sailed, she’d admitted she wasn’t an adventurous helmsman. Mason eased away, his eyes glued to the pure joy radiating from her.
“God! No wonder Bran loves this so much,” she commented as her face lifted to the sails.
“We’ll need to change course to reach my destination. You want to try it?”
For a moment, he saw eagerness in her expression before it faded. “No. Maybe not this time.”
He took over from her, sad she didn’t have the confidence to try, but encouraged by the fact her response indicated there might be a second time. “We’ll slip into a cove that’s normally pretty deserted other than a few shore birds. We can go swimming if you’d like.”
She remained standing near him. “I’d love to.” Stacey tucked a few strands of hair behind her ear. “Thank you for this, Mason.”
The look she gave him was almost shy. When his heart clenched, he began to realize how little they actually knew about each other. Two years ago, they’d been consumed with getting the clothes off each other so they could have sex. But lust hadn’t been enough. She had gotten engaged to someone else, and any chance they’d had to form a deeper relationship had ended.
He’d like to get to know her better, but the feelings he still harbored for her made it difficult, because along with the passion was the pain from her rejection. She had completely blindsided him with her sudden engagement to Winchester, destroying his trust.
He altered course and tacked toward the cove where he’d anchor. Stacey helped, doing what he asked without question. She’d stuck the baseball cap back on her head to keep her hair out of her face. As she worked, he saw the play of muscle across her arms and shoulders. Slender, she might be, but she wasn’t weak. From what Mason had heard regarding her family, they’d spent most of their summers along the coast sailing or swimming.
They both stripped to suits once the boat was secure and went over the edge. Stacey cut through the water with the ease of someone as comfortable in the sea as on it. What amazed Mason even more as he watched her through the afternoon was how much freer she seemed, as if a heavy weight had been lifted from her shoulders.
As they finished lunch, he offered casually, “Let me take you out to dinner tonight. Just friends. There’s a great oyster bar not far from the naval academy.”
“I know it. It’s been years since I’ve been there.”
She hadn’t said no. “We could split a pitcher of beer, have some oysters…”
“Okay.”
Mason grinned. “Great! Why don’t you sail back and I’ll crew?”
“Oh, I couldn’t…”
“Yeah. You can, Stacey. You’ve got the feel of her. Sail like you would your own boat.”
Chapter 4
They were back in the hotel room. Jace slumped on the mattress edge. Defeat dragged him down. Justin sat next to him, but Jace couldn’t even bring himself to reach out to him.
“I told you I would help, and I will,” Justin said quietly. “I’m sorry there doesn’t seem to be another way.”
Jace swallowed, and swallowed again. Knowing he needed to say something, he finally choked out. “I feel like such a loser.”
“Oh Christ, baby. You are so far from that. Look, getting the damn mumps wasn’t your fault.”
Jace shook his head. “It sure feels like it was. And you have no idea what a mess I’ve made of this whole thing.”
“Then tell me.”
Jace looked into Justin’s deep green eyes, feeling like he was once again standing in the middle of the evergreen lined trout stream flowing through the Worthington ranch. He knew he had to come clean, at least with regard to part of it–the part that truly concerned Justin.
“When you left for Australia, I was hurt, devastated. I’d convinced myself I would lose you. You’d be on the other side of the world while I was stuck here running a business I never truly wanted.” Jace took Justin’s hand, twining their fingers. “I panicked. We’ve always been so careful. You’ve always understood why I wasn’t ready to come out. My parents were never as understanding as yours.”
Justin pulled his hand free, but only so he could put both of his on either side of Ja
ce’s head. “Tell me, babe. Tell me what happened, so we can work it out.”
“I hit on a guy at a bar here in the district.”
“Aw, Jace.”
“We hooked up. It was supposed to be quick, anonymous, but the guy somehow figured out who I was, and I panicked he would out me, so I called Stacey. We’d had a few pretty platonic dates in high school. I thought if I was in a relationship with a woman, no one would believe this guy if he did say anything.
“My mother was ecstatic. Not only was I finally dating a woman, I was dating the highly suitable daughter of one of her best friends. The pressure was intense, but I wasn’t getting anywhere with Stacey, wasn’t even sure I wanted to, and the pressure from my family was only getting worse. Then my hook-up surfaced.”
“Please don’t tell me you gave him money.”
Jason sighed. “I did, trying to stall him while I figured out what to do.”
“Then he could come back any time.”
He shook his head. “I hate to admit this because I still only feel relief when I think about it–the guy was killed in a traffic accident on the beltway–but by then I was engaged to Stacey. With both our mothers already planning the wedding of the century, I was trapped.”
The silence stretched for a bit. Justin rubbed his hand over Jace’s shoulders, the touch helping him relax until Justin spoke again. “You said you weren’t getting anywhere with Stacey. How did it change to getting engaged?”
Jason almost blurted the entire truth, but closed his eyes and said, “I asked and she said yes.”
* * * *
Guilt gnawed at her while she sailed Mason’s boat back toward Mac’s Marina. She shouldn’t be having so much fun, feeling so relieved, without her husband along. She glanced over her shoulder to where Mason lounged in the stern. He grinned at her and she smiled back. He was so much more relaxed here than at the gallery. Her encounters with him in the city were always so intense. First, when they’d jumped all over each other, then because he always went out of his way to stir her temper.
Broken Heart Page 4
