by London Casey
“What the fuck is the difference?” I asked. “We stay here and plan, we’re fucked. We go out there and fight, we’re fucked. At least we’ll go out with some damn pride.”
“Someone get Hudson a shot of whiskey,” Prez said.
“And a tampon,” Jasper added.
“What was that, VP?”
Jasper’s rattlesnake eyes locked with mine. “You heard me.”
I took a step and Austin and Max jumped in.
“No, let him go,” Jasper said. “You got something on your mind, brother. Get it out. Throw a fist. Come on.”
“Don’t,” Max said to me. “Don’t be stupid here, bro. We’re all fucking pissed off.”
“That we are,” Prez said. “So, here’s what I’m going to do. I’m posting two members per spot where Aaron’s been seen. We play this close to our chest and see what kicks out. He won’t wait for long. Next time he attacks, we’ll be ready for him.”
“Does that sound fucking fair to you, Hudson?” Jasper asked.
“Jasper,” Prez said. “Go take a walk somewhere.”
Prez looked at me but didn’t talk.
“I’m going for a ride. In my fucking truck.”
“You’ll get there, brother,” Cash said.
“If anything changes, let me know,” I said. I looked at Jasper. “VP.”
“Hudson,” he said.
We both gave a little head nod.
There was nothing wrong with two brothers having a little tussle here and there. It kept the club real and accountable.
The truth was, I didn’t give a damn about Aaron. The little prick would get caught and get what was coming to him. I was sure Prez had been talking to Villie and Miller on how to handle the potential backlash from the Irish. My solution would be to cover it all up, feed Garvan and Bryant a fresh plate of bullshit that they’d eat because they wouldn’t have proof otherwise. And if they wanted to start the fucking war, they’d need to get approval from the O’Nuall family and they didn’t want war with the MC.
Peace was no fun, but it was quiet. Even when everyone had a dagger in their hand for everyone else’s back.
That was just how shit operated.
I sat in my truck for a few minutes and watched as the guys all emerged from the clubhouse. One by one they got on their motorcycles. The thundering sound of the rides. That fucking feeling.
I needed it.
I needed it bad. Worse than a drug.
To my right, beside the truck, was my ride.
Again, I waited.
Once the lot was clear of anyone watching, I got out of the truck.
It was time I get on my motorcycle and ride… even if it killed me.
19
CORA
I rolled the window down, and a guy with a cigarette between his lips looked down at me. He picked up his sunglasses and eyed me. He took the cigarette out of his mouth, blowing smoke, and pointed at me.
“I know you.”
“Hudson,” I said.
“Ah, right. Yeah. Okay. He knows you’re here?”
“Yeah,” I lied.
“Okay. Keep going.”
I drove to a spot and got out of the car. I walked through the lot, noticing how many motorcycles were gone, and wondered what they were all doing. Drinking at a bar? Throwing money at a strip club? Or were they out there breaking the law?
I heard the sound of a motorcycle engine, and that chased the thoughts away.
That deep growling sound, so freaking loud. It sounded like the motorcycle was right next to me. But there wasn’t one in sight. At least, not for a few seconds.
Then, a motorcycle came around the side of the clubhouse.
And an outlaw on the motorcycle.
No helmet.
Sunglasses on.
The baddest and wildest looked man I’d ever seen.
It was Hudson.
My jaw dropped.
He was riding slow, but there he was, on his motorcycle. He spotted me and cruised right down to me. When he stopped, he had to put his feet on the ground. He leaned to the right, and I knew that had to be too much weight.
“Hudson…”
“What are you doing here?” he asked me.
I reached into my pocket and took out a piece of paper. “This.”
“What is it?”
“A note.”
He looked at me, then looked at the note.
“Give me a second to park this thing.”
Hudson throttled the motorcycle and started to move again. I had to give him credit: he was on the motorcycle. He was riding. It was what he’d wanted. I’m sure it wasn’t exactly perfect, but it was something.
He circled around, then stood there again, more weight on the right. He walked the motorcycle backward and I could see the pain on face each time he stepped on his left leg.
I walked to the motorcycle as he climbed off, favoring his healing leg.
“You did it,” I said. “I mean, you really did it, Hudson.”
“Far from what I need to do. But that’s better than nothing. What do you want?”
“About what happened the other day…”
“Doesn’t matter,” he said. “We drew the line, we crossed the line, we drew it again. Done.”
I nodded. “Okay. Well, I wanted to show you this.”
He took the piece of paper from me. “What is this? Money?”
“Look at the number.”
“This a bill for your services?” he asked me, cocky.
“No, Hudson. It’s what I have to pay. Tonight.”
“What? Three large?”
I nodded. “Yeah. It’s one of many payments, Hudson.”
“For what?”
“Are you sure you want to get involved in my fucked-up mess of a life?”
Hudson looked down at the paper again.
It had been waiting for me that morning, right on the porch, under my morning newspaper. That meant he was at my house multiple times. And he was smart enough to research my house and he was smart enough to make me disappear if I didn’t do what he wanted.
“Yeah, I want to know everything,” Hudson said. “Come on. I’ll get you a beer.”
Hudson topped the mug off and put it front of me. He stood there behind the bar, arms crossed.
I sipped the ice-cold beer and licked my lips. I wasn’t a big drinker, but I felt like I should have been like Hudson with the bottle of whiskey to help chase the pain away.
“Nobody really knows this,” I said. “But I’m in trouble.”
“I can see that,” Hudson said. “I’ve sensed it about you from the second I met you. You associate me with whatever’s going on, right?”
“Yeah. Outlaws. Criminals. Dirty people.”
“Dirty,” Hudson scoffed. “The last time I remember anything dirty was in your bed, sweetheart.”
My face burned. I sipped more beer.
“Do you want to hear this or not?”
“I’m standing here, right?”
“I was supposed to go to medical school,” I said. “That was my plan. I wanted to be a doctor. Ever since I was a kid. My mother got sick when I was young. I don’t remember her, but I remember her dying.”
“Oh, shit, sweetheart,” Hudson said. He uncrossed his arms and grabbed the bar. “I’m sorry.”
“She got a stomachache and went to the hospital. Never came home. From that second on, I wanted to be a doctor. I wanted to understand what happened to my mother. And I wanted to save other kids’ mothers from dying.”
“You were just a kid…”
“I never gave up on it. It was tough growing up, and my father worked really hard. He took on two jobs, sometimes three to get me through school. It was so expensive, you know? But I did it. I got through college and was close to getting into medical school. Then he got hurt.”
“How?”
“At work. He fell off a ladder and hit his right side. The doctors were afraid of internal damage, but he was fine from the fall
. The scan, however, showed the cancer.”
“Damn,” Hudson said.
“It was really everywhere in his body. Doctors couldn’t figure out how he managed to live like he was. I mean, he had aches and pains, but nothing that caught my attention. I felt like a failure. I was supposed to be a doctor, and I couldn’t tell that my father was sick?”
“Jesus, Cora,” Hudson said. “Cancer doesn’t come wearing a t-shirt. You know that.”
I nodded as my eyes went misty. “Even still, I was going to be the doctor. I was going to keep my father from getting sick. That was the whole plan. But I couldn’t even do that. He was sick. And it all happened so fast. Just like, that he was out of work. No work meant no money. And no money meant no school for me. I’ll never forget the look on his face when I had to tell him that I couldn’t finish school. I had one semester left to get my degree, and then it was off to medical school. One little semester away. Oh, the look on his face, Hudson. He was destroyed. He wanted to die right then. I remember him turning this head away and just sobbing. I’d never seen him cry like that before. I blurted out that I would take care of everything. I would find a way to make it work. Of course, he didn’t believe me. I didn’t even believe me.”
I took another sip of beer and stared down at the drink.
“Keep going,” Hudson said. “I’m assuming you got the money.”
I looked at Hudson. “There was a medicine to try, but it was super expensive. I felt like my entire world was just imploding. And that was when I met him. David.”
I hadn’t said his name out loud in a long time. I hadn’t told anyone about him.
“And who is David?”
“Not a good guy,” I said. “He gives money and expects a lot back in return.”
“A loan shark,” Hudson said. “Shit.”
“Yeah. I knew someone who’d dealt with him before. Just a few thousand dollars. I met him asked for a lot of money. Enough to finish school and pay for that experimental drug. In my mind, if I could keep my father alive long enough to see me get through school, he’d be fine. I planned on working to build my credit and then take out loans for medical school. I couldn’t even get a loan for that semester of school though. I should have known better, Hudson. But I was so afraid. I was so alone.”
Hudson put a hand to my arm. “I’m not judging you, sweetheart. You did what you felt was right.”
“Yeah, well, it didn’t work.”
“What do you mean?”
“David played me. He gave me money to finish school, but not for the experimental drug. Not that it would have helped. My father was so far sick by then…” I choked on the words. “Dammit.” I wiped the corners of my eyes.
“Ah, shit, Cora,” Hudson said.
Next thing I knew, the giant outlaw was climbing over the bar. He shouldn’t have been moving like that with his leg…but then again, maybe he was healing. Really healing.
He jumped off the bar, stumbled, and cursed as he grabbed his left leg. Then he sat next to me and put a hand to my leg. My body immediately felt like it had been set on fire.
“It’s okay,” he whispered. “You can tell me anything.”
“My father died,” I confessed.
I lowered my head.
Hudson threw an arm around me and pulled me close. I started to sob. It was kind of silly, to be honest. It was years ago that this had happened, but I’d never had anyone to console me. I’d gotten the call about my father’s passing and had no time to grieve. I had to finish school, get a job, and start paying David back.
“Let it all go, sweetheart,” Hudson said.
He was so strong, so comforting. I grabbed at his steel like arms and wept like I had never done before.
I finally sucked in a breath and pushed away from him.
“David gets what he wants from me,” I said. “Cash, I mean. I was at least smart enough to figure out how to finish school and become a physical therapist. It was easy for me, you know? I really love doing it, too. It’s good work. But the money…I have to save because when David shows up…”
“How much?”
“I’ve paid him double what he gave me.”
“And he still wants more?”
“Yeah.”
“Fuck.”
“Yeah. Sometimes he goes months without contacting me. This time it’s too soon. And he’s never bothered me at my house before. It’s always been at work. He’s been leaving notes in the mailbox and on the porch.”
“He wants three grand,” Hudson said.
“Yeah. And who knows when he’ll show up again? And again. And again…”
My chin quivered but I wasn’t going to collapse again.
“Then it has to stop,” Hudson said. “I’ll talk to him.”
“No. You are not fighting my battle.”
“I’m not fighting it, I’m ending it. You paid that guy back double of what he gave you. That’s enough.”
“Hudson…”
“Cora, listen to me,” Hudson said. “You’ve seen my guys. You’ve seen what we do and what we’re capable of. We take care of those we care about. You’re part of this family. In case you didn't notice, all of us come from fucked-up situations. Okay? So it’s no surprise what you’re telling me.”
“What do I do then, Hudson?”
“You don’t have three grand?”
“If I start digging through couch cushions…”
Hudson stood up and walked away from me. He held up a finger, then he was gone.
A second later, the clubhouse door opened and in came Cash, Austin, and Xavier.
Cash looked right at me. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”
“Hey Cash.”
He came right up to the bar and sat next to me.
Xavier sat on the other side. “Austin, get us some drinks.”
“Fuck you, brother.”
“You’re the last one standing,” Cash said. “Rules.” He knocked on the bar.
Austin went behind the bar and threw the middle finger up as he got out two fresh beers.
“So what brings you here?” Cash asked.
“Checking on Hudson,” I said.
“How’s the leg?”
“It’s his leg, not mine.”
“What’s your opinion, Doc?”
“I’m not a damn doctor, Cash,” I said.
“So what do you wear when you’re working?”
“Clothes,” I said.
“No uniform or anything?”
“Jesus, Cash, let it go,” Xavier said, winking at me. “He’s trying to fantasize you into some slutty nurse costume.”
I looked at Cash, and his eyes were shut. He put his hands out like he was touching breasts. “Yeah,” he whispered. “Work my leg, babe. Yeah, that’s right, my third leg. I know, it’s the biggest leg, right? I don’t know how I carry it around the way I do.”
“Ew,” I whispered.
Austin grabbed the drink hose from under the bar and sprayed water at Cash.
Cash jumped back. “Fuck! What was that for?”
“Cool down, man,” Austin said with a laugh.
“Cash, I wear what I want to work,” I said.
“What the hell is this?” Hudson asked as he appeared back at the bar.
“Cash is picturing Cora in a slutty nurse’s costume,” Austin said.
“I’ll cut your eyes out,” Hudson said. “Both of you, disappear right now. I have to talk to Cora alone.”
“Alone,” Cash said with air quotes.
“What the hell does that mean?” Hudson asked.
“You can be alone with her, brother,” Cash said, “but she’ll be thinking of me.”
Hudson started to charge at Cash.
I grinned, loving the way he wanted to defend me. And that his leg was working better. And that I sort of…well, I sort of loved him.
I jumped up before Hudson could get to Cash.
“Let him think about me,” I said. Hudson put on the brakes. “He can th
ink all he wants, but he’ll never get me. He won’t even be able to ever buy me a beer.”
“Shit,” Austin said. “That sounds like a challenge, Cash.”
Cash reached into his pocket and took out a five and slapped it on the bar. “That’s for your beer.”
Without hesitation, I grabbed the bill and ripped it in half.
Cash’s eyes went wide. “Damn…”
Cash nodded and slowly backed away. Hudson snapped his fingers at Austin.
They both were gone shortly after.
“Sorry about that,” Hudson said to me.
“I don’t mind,” I said. “It’s better than hurting me.”
“They’d never hurt you. I’d kill them.”
“You moved pretty fast there.”
Hudson nodded. “I’m there, sweetheart. And now, it’s your turn to heal.”
Hudson reached into his pocket. He took out a gun.
I jumped back shook my head. “What is…”
“It’s mine,” he said. “You can have it if you want. But this…” Hudson reached into his other pocket and took out a wad of cash. “This is yours.”
“What?”
“Three grand,” he said. “And this is it. Final payment.”
“Hudson, no.”
He touched my face. Electricity rippled head to toe through my body. “Yes, sweetheart. This is it. You tell him that. Take the gun if you want, too. You tell him this is the last time. If he tries anything else…”
I saw the rage in Hudson’s eyes. He made me want to smile, but truthfully I was scared. I didn’t want to see Hudson fighting two wars.
“Take it seriously,” he said.
“Hudson!” Cash’s voice yelled from somewhere else in the clubhouse. “Prez wants a meeting!”
“Now!” Hudson ordered.
I grabbed the cash and tucked it away, swallowing hard. “I don’t know what to say here…”
“I owe you this,” he said.
“You’ve been paying me.”
“Not just my leg, sweetheart.”
Hudson reached for my hand and put it to his chest, over his heart.
My body melted. My panties were melting, just like my own heart.
