Halle ate everything on the plate, leaving only the overly strong coffee behind.
“You’re sure I can’t make you another cup?” her mother asked on the other side of the table. “I could try to figure out the machine again.”
“No, I’m good. Thanks, M…” she trailed off.
“You…” her mother shifted on her perch. “You can call me mom if you want to.”
Halle thought about it, but the M-word felt too intimate for a woman she hadn’t seen in twelve years. The woman who’d abandoned her and told her to move on with her life.
“I’m done,” she said, deflecting to her empty plate. “I’ll just…”
“No, let me.” Her mother picked it up and took it to the sink. “Any ideas about what you want to do this afternoon?” she asked as she ran water over the plate.
Halle glanced out the window. “Oh wow, is it already afternoon?”
“Yes,” her mother answered somewhat apologetically. “You seemed exhausted when you showed up here yesterday, and I didn’t want to wake you.”
“I was,” Halle admitted. “Um…thank you for taking me in.”
“Oh, honey, you don’t have to—” Her mother’s breath caught. “You don’t have to thank me. I’m happy to have the company.”
Halle crooked her head, wondering if company was how her mother qualified her now. Not her daughter, but a visitor who’d showed up out of the blue. Someone new to throw southern hospitality at. “Well, I am grateful,” Halle said anyway because she was.
“We could go to Main Street. They have a few nice boutiques there. Maybe we could get you some things…” her mother’s gaze trailed down to Halle’s outfit, “…other than sweatpants.”
And there it was. The disapproval Halle remembered so well. Never being good enough or fashionable enough for the former Miss Teen Wolf.
“I think I might go back to sleep, actually,” Halle answered as another wave of depression washed over her. “I’ve had a hard week.”
A few ticks went by, and Halle wondered what her mother knew. About the Chivaree and her pregnancy.
Maybe the former. Definitely the latter. Her mother might be a delicate brown teacup, but she still had her shifter senses under all that perfectly applied make-up. She could probably smell the pregnancy on her.
As if to confirm her suspicions, Keri returned to the seat across from her and said, “Maybe now would be a good time to talk about what brought you here. We haven’t spoken in many years, but of course, I read what everyone else did on the WolfNet about you and the King of Alaska—”
A knock interrupted her careful segway into meatier topics. And like a pretty poodle who’d suddenly been beckoned, her mother’s attention went to the door. “Oh, I wonder who that could be?”
She rose from her seat and after smoothing her already perfectly smooth dress went out to the front room.
Real talk, Halle was glad for the unexpected reprieve. And nearly as soon as her mother was out of sight, she stood, preparing to escape back to the guest bedroom while Keri was distracted at the door…
But then a voice called out, “Halle?! Halle, where are you?!”
No, no…it couldn’t be!
But it totally could. In the next moment, Nago slammed into the kitchen, his face thunderous with rage.
24
They stared at each other.
Nago enraged. Halle aghast.
There had been a time when no matter how big Nago got, she would have trusted he’d never hurt a fly. But those days were long gone. And the details Eric had shown her floated back into her head…not just numbers, but accountings of ugly deeds. Threats, blackmail, manipulation.
Her mother ended up speaking before either of them did. Bursting through the kitchen door behind Nago and saying, “Now wait just a minute! I don’t think Halle wants to see you right now,” to the King of Alaska.
“You ran,” Nago said to Halle as if her mother hadn’t spoken. As if she wasn’t even there. “You ran, and you never gave me a chance to explain.”
Halle blinked at him, thoughts tripping over fear. Fear tripping over anger. “How?” she demanded. “How did you find me? My bioware is off.”
“Yeah, there are ways to access offline bioware,” he answered with an aggravated look. “It requires huge oversteps you probably don’t want to know about.”
“But you took them,” she pointed out, her voice shaking with anger.
“Yes, I did,” he answered with no remorse. “Halle, you’re the mother of my child! What did you expect me to do after you left me chained up in that clinic bed? Just go home without knowing if you were okay?”
“I’m okay,” she answered without an ounce of hesitation because he didn’t deserve to know how not okay she was. “You leaving now?”
Nago stared at her for a tense second. Then broke off, his handsome face contorting into an ugly frown. “Dammit, Halle. We nearly made it. If Ohio hadn’t interfered—”
“It still would have been wrong. What you did—the way you sabotaged my life for ten years—it was wrong!”
“And I’m sorry for that. But—”
“There should be no ‘but’ after that sentence. What you did goes beyond a simple ‘I’m sorry.’ How can you not see that?”
“How can I not see that?” he repeated, throwing her question back at her like it was the stupidest thing he’d ever been asked in his life. “I can’t see that because if any of those guys had been remotely worthy of you, they wouldn’t have taken the payoff! Wouldn’t have cared about their reputations more than they cared about staying with you. If any of those guys had deserved even an ounce of your love, they would have sacrificed anything to be with you.”
“Oh, yeah? Eric didn’t take your bribe,” she pointed out. “His character is unimpeachable. So why didn’t you just let him have me and be done with it?”
Nago’s head jerked back as if she’d punched him. “Ohio? That overreaching fuck was the worst of them. He only wanted you for your title, Halle. Otherwise, he would have fallen into line, too!”
“I was okay with that! Totally okay with that!” she yelled back at him. “Because you know what? Only wanting me for my title is better than pretending you’re in love with me before tossing me out like trash. And then manipulating my entire love life to the point that I felt like there was something wrong with me. Like I was damaged goods who deserved to be left in that hotel room…”
God, it had been ten years ago, yet hot tears sprang to her as if it happened yesterday.
“Halle…” Nago said, shoulders deflating. “There’s nothing wrong with you. But it was the only way I could…”
He broke off, shaking his head. Then taking a deep breath, he said, “Halle, there are things I have to tell you. About my wolf. About why I did what I did—”
“There’s something wrong with you,” she guessed, cutting him off. “Something happened in the Marines that changed you and made you unable to control your wolf—even after mating. That’s the big secret you’ve been keeping, right?”
Nago stopped. Completely taken aback by her assessment of his situation, because… “Yeah…I mean, yeah, that’s exactly what happened.”
He reset. Squared his shoulders and finished telling her the flat-out truth. “A mission went bad while I was in the Wolf Force, and it…it really messed me up. I thought I could handle it when I got back Stateside, but I couldn’t. This wolf inside me was out of control…” He swallowed, thinking back to the hardest time of his life. “So I left. To keep you safe, I left. Even though you were the love of my life.”
He put it all on the table. Finally. But Halle only stared at him before saying, “You left me. To keep me safe.” She threw his words back at him like they were the most idiotic things she’d ever heard. Then she asked in a derisive tone, “Did it ever occur to you, King Nago, that the only place I ever felt safe was with you? That I didn’t care how damaged you were when you came back, I just wanted to be with you. I would have
done anything to be with you!”
“But I couldn’t be with you like that! I tried, and I barely got through your first heat session without shifting. The whole time I was terrified of hurting you, but I couldn’t stop it—couldn’t stop my wolf from claiming you. And you saw what he was like. Uncontrollable. I never wanted to put you in that position. Which is why I stayed away. This whole time, I’ve been working toward one goal. Getting the wolf in line and getting you back. Please believe me! What looks like lies and manipulations was me doing the best I could with the shitty set of parameters I was given.”
Another long stare. And then she asked, “Did you think I wouldn’t have understood what you were going through?”
He flinched at the question, because couldn’t she see… “It wasn’t about you understanding. There wasn’t anything to understand. I had a wild, uncontrollable beast inside me. There was only getting it away from you. Learning to manage it, so I could be the man you deserve.”
“The man I deserve is honest,” Halle shot back. “Someone man enough to be with me even if there’s something wrong with him. Especially if there’s something wrong with him. Dude, I’m a great fixer upper!”
A joke. Somewhere on the edge of his reason, he got that. But he yelled back, “No, I was supposed to be your fucking prince, Halle! Do you think I wanted you to take care of me like you have to take care of your worthless father and that rundown kingdom-town of yours? Do you think I wanted to be another fucking thing on the list of ‘shit Halle needs to fix?’ Hell, no! You’re the one who needed saving, not me. That wasn’t what you signed up for. And I’d be damned if I was going to let you waste ten years of your life with a fucking invalid wolf—”
“Is that how you see yourself? How you see me?” she demanded, cutting him off.
She shook her head at him. “Like I’m some tragic princess, and you’re this huge invalid, too imperfect to love? Well, fuck you, Nago Nightwolf. I didn’t want a prince and a fairytale. All I wanted was you. I loved you. Unconditionally. And I wish you could have loved me the same way.”
Her words cut him to the bone. “I do love you, Halle,” he said, his voice coarse with emotion. “I’m out of my goddamn mind in love with you—obviously—or we wouldn’t be here. Don’t ever say I don’t love you.”
But she didn’t back down. “No...if you loved me, like at all, you would have trusted me. You wouldn’t have consigned me to this living hell without you for the last ten years.”
“Halle, let me…” he said, coming toward her. He couldn’t take it anymore. She wasn’t listening to reason, and he knew if she’d just let him touch her, hold her, then she’d see it from his point of view. Choose him again as she did in the cabin.
But she held up a hand, staying his advance. “No! Don’t touch me! It’s over!” she yelled at him.
“It’s not over,” he ground out, not even able to comprehend how she could say those words to him. “I fucking love you and I know you still love me. You chose me to be the father of that baby you’re carrying.”
“Yes, I chose you when I was out of my mind with heat. But right now? I’m choosing not to be with a wolf who lies and manipulates me for ‘my own good’ anymore. We’re done!”
She meant it, Nago realized. Every word that was coming out of her mouth. She really meant it.
The wolf went strangely quiet inside him. Leaving nobody but the human he’d clung to for so long to say, “No…no. This isn’t over. Whether you like it or not, I’m still your state’s king. And I won your hand by Chivaree. That means you don’t have a choice when it comes to this. You also don’t have the resources to battle me in court. And I know you still love me, no matter what you say. So this is not over. Not until I say it is.”
She lowered her arm, but the look on her face did just as good a job of telling him to stay back. “I used to love you, Nago. But you killed it. With your lies and your schemes, you killed everything good that we used to be. You took the person I loved the most in this world away from me, and I’ll never forgive you for that.”
She shook her head at him, disappointment radiating from her now as strongly as her heat scent did a few days ago. “Even if you make me marry you, you can’t make me live with you. So yeah, go ahead and use this baby as leverage. Prove to me that you’re the asshole I thought you were all these years we’ve been apart. Because the only thing we will ever share between us is custody of this child. And this web of lies you want to call a relationship? It is over. So until you have a court order to be here, you need to get on out of this house.”
For some reason he wanted her to hit him again. Because at least that response showed passion. But she only stood there. Cold and immovable.
And the wolf said nothing. It stayed completely silent as if it was standing over the grave of his and Halle’s relationship.
“Halle…” he started.
But then a voice said, “Young man, my daughter asked you to leave, so please do so. Right now.”
Halle’s mother. He’d forgotten she was still there.
The woman who’d abandoned her.
The other person she’d loved who’d abandoned her.
And suddenly Nago understood how badly he’d fucked up. That his plan not to return to her until he could be the mate she deserved had in fact ruined any chance they had of a happily ever after.
25
Halle watched Nago process her words.
Kept her face composed in a cold mask so he could see she was one hundred percent sure of herself and wouldn’t back down. Ignored the wolf whimpering inside her for her mate.
He’s not our mate, she told her wolf. The Nago we fell in love with is dead. This guy was just pretending to be him.
Yet he stood there for moments on end. Looking like something she’d broken.
For a moment, it seemed as if he might argue again, but then with one last dark look, he turned and stormed out of the kitchen past her mother.
Gone. Finally. Halle could only hope for good.
At least that’s what she’d keep telling herself. Until both she and her wolf believed it.
“Halle?” A hand touched her arm.
Her mother was standing beside her.
“Would you…?” Her mother looked to the side as if scanning through her etiquette books for how to handle the ugly scene in her kitchen. “Would you like to talk about it? What just happened?”
Halle stared at her mother for a beat, then said, “You haven’t been a mother to me for twelve years. There’s no reason to start acting like one now.”
Then without another word, she went back to the bedroom to gather her things.
There was no reason not to return to the Mississippi kingdom house now. Nago had found her which meant there was no way or reason for her to hide anymore. Plus, the kingdom-town was what she knew. What she’d always known.
But instead of packing the few things she’d taken out of her suitcase, she sat down on the edge of the bed. Wanting to do something, wanting to fix this, but unable to move for the ache in her heart.
Why? she had to ask herself. Why did telling him to leave hurt even worse than being left behind?
Because of the mate bond. Even stronger now after ten years. It’s biology, she reminded herself. Give yourself time. It will pass.
So she waited. Sat there, trying to reconcile all the feelings swirling around inside her.
“Where is she?!” A voice, low-pitched and angry, sounded on the other side of the door. “No, Keri, I will talk to her! I cannot hold my tongue any longer!”
Halle looked up just as Utibe shoved open the door with a crash.
She rose to her feet, tilting her head to the side. Funny, she thought. Canadian wolves had a reputation for being almost comically polite in comparison to American wolves, but apparently, Utibe hadn’t gotten the memo.
He came to a stop directly in front of her, not even seeming to feel the tug of his wife pulling back on his arm with both her hands.
&nbs
p; “You brought danger into my house. After everything my wife has gone through with you, you put her life in danger!”
“Honey, please don’t make a scene. I told you it was nothing. I’m fine. We’re both fine.”
Utibe threw his wife a disbelieving look over his shoulder. “Maybe she is fine, but you are not.” Then he turned back to Halle with a vicious glare. “You are the reason my wife calls me at work, crying. Not because your mate might have hurt her, but because you refuse to call her by her proper title. And tell her she should not try to act the mother to you.”
“Wait, I’m sorry Nago came here, but I don’t understand why you’re so upset with me. I didn’t mean for Keri to get scared…”
“I wasn’t,” her mother insisted. “I was just upset for you. That’s all. Utibe is being silly…”
“Do not put words in my mouth, woman!” he said, turning to face her. “You are my fated mate, but I will not abide by you pretending this girl did not choose to hurt you for many years before showing up here and asking you to hide her from this dangerous wolf she brought to our house while I was not here to protect you. What if he had hurt you, my darling? Then what would I have done?”
“But he didn’t,” Keri insisted. “I am alright. He’s gone now. And everyone’s fine. Including Halle.”
“Yes, Halle,” he sneered. “The girl who ignores you for twelve years then takes advantage of your good heart.”
“Wait, what do you mean I ignored her—?” Halle started to ask.
But before she could get the words out her mother shouted, “She had every reason to ignore me! I left her. And you don’t understand because you don’t have kids, but I betrayed her trust by going off with you. And it was up to her whether she wanted to see me again. And it might hurt that she won’t call me Mama anymore, but I’ll take her. Any way I can get her, I’ll take her. She’s my daughter, Utibe. And I won’t apologize for finally having the chance to be here for her in her time of need.”
NAGO, His Mississippi Queen: 50 Loving States, Mississippi (The Brothers Nightwolf Trilogy, Book 1) Page 13
