by K J Taylor
Chryso started to stab the spear into the ground. ‘Why . . . won’t it break?’
‘You’re just too weak,’ said Ambit. ‘It takes real stones to break that spear.’
It had exactly the effect he’d hoped for. Chryso started to stab even harder, and then bashed the spear on the rock formation where the girl had taken cover. The spear bent slightly with every impact, but always snapped back into shape. Shards of rock flew everywhere, and lava trickled from the wound in Chryso’s chest, but still the spear stayed stubbornly intact.
‘Come on!’ Ambit shouted from a safe distance. ‘Put your back into it, you pebble!’
Snarl had appeared on top of the rock heap, peering down at the other demon. ‘You can’t break it,’ she said, ‘you idiot. It’s unbreakable. He’s just toying with you.’
‘Hey, it’s working, isn’t it?’ said Ambit. ‘He’s a moron.’
Chryso roared in rage, turned, and threw the spear as hard as he could straight at the irritating human.
It was the moment Ambit had been waiting for. He leapt straight upward, and caught the spear in midair. Almost in the same movement he turned it, dived forward and hurled the weapon with all his strength. The spear went zipping through the air, trailing bits of loose leather, and hit Chryso square in the throat. The demon fell with a groan like grinding rocks, and the impact pushed the spear all the way through his neck.
Ambit quickly checked that Mal had left, and spotted the demon a good way down the river.
‘That’s that, then,’ he said to no-one in particular, and went to retrieve the spear. It came loose with a few hard pulls, and he dunked it in the river to cool it down faster. That done, he tapped it on the ground again to clean it and hastily replaced the leather wrappings. By the time the girl came over to check on him he was back at the dead demon, busy prying out the eyes.
The girl watched from a safe distance. ‘Thank you,’ she said primly. ‘You were helpful.’
Ambit stuffed the eyes in his moneybag. ‘You’re welcome. Now where’s my reward?’
The girl gave him a filthy look. ‘I can’t believe you did that. Demanding a reward before you help another human being? Against demons? What’s wrong with you?’
‘I’m too amazing for normal people to handle?’ Ambit suggested.
The girl sniffed at him. ‘Aren’t you charming?’
‘Not much of an observation. It usually only takes a couple of seconds for most people to notice that,’ said Ambit. ‘Anyway, who are you?’
‘A traveller,’ the girl said hastily. ‘Nobody important.’
‘Okay . . . but I was kind of asking about your name.’
‘Oh.’ The girl hesitated. She was younger than him and very pretty, with unusual colouring; where most people had one extra shade in their hair hers was striped with all the colours of the rainbow, with only a hint of brown showing through in the bottom layer. Her eyes were odd as well – one gold, one bronze.
‘You know, fake names are more convincing if you don’t stand around and think about them first,’ Ambit said eventually.
‘I’m just . . . er . . .’ The girl clutched at her burn. ‘My arm . . .’
‘Right.’ Ambit touched his face gingerly: a nasty lump had started to grow on his forehead, and there were several cuts left by Chryso’s rocky skin. His nose was still bleeding. ‘Maybe we should go and clean ourselves up.’
‘Yes, good idea,’ said the girl, with obvious relief.
Ambit started to walk off toward the river, but a sharp intake of breath from the girl stopped him – along with her hand, which grabbed him by the elbow.
‘Look out, there’s another one!’ she said, jabbing a finger at the rock heap where Snarl had started to climb down.
‘Relax, that one’s a buddy of mine,’ said Ambit. ‘Thanks for the help, by the way.’
‘You’re welcome.’ Snarl stepped on flat ground, and looked up at the rainbow-haired girl. ‘Who’s this, then?’
‘Don’t know. She couldn’t come up with a fake name quickly enough to tell me when I asked,’ said Ambit. ‘Let’s just call her Rainbow. Rainbow, this is Snarl. Snarl, Rainbow.’
‘You’re friends with a demon?’ said the girl.
‘You’re friends with a human?’ Snarl mimicked. ‘What were you doing here, anyway?’
‘I was in trouble and your friend here wouldn’t even help me until I offered to pay him,’ said Rainbow. ‘Considering that he’s friends with a demon, maybe I shouldn’t be surprised.’
Snarl growled at her. ‘You were the one who started that. If it weren’t for you, Ambit wouldn’t have had to kill that demon. You went and provoked both of them. You’re lucky we didn’t leave you to be eaten.’
Rainbow gaped at her. ‘They were demons,’ she said.
‘Er, that’s not exactly the sort of argument you should use with Snarl,’ said Ambit. ‘Anyway, let’s get out of here so we don’t have to deal with more of them.’
‘Fine,’ said Rainbow.
A short way upriver they found a crossing point where some fallen rocks had made a makeshift bridge. Snarl hopped across, leaving the two humans to follow, and from there they walked out of demon territory. They stopped at the border, under the cover of some trees, and Ambit and Rainbow both washed their injuries in the river.
Once she had dunked her arm in the water, Rainbow sat down on a handy rock and showed the burn to Ambit.
He eyed it for a while. ‘Yes, very pretty.’
‘Don’t just sit there!’ Rainbow said eventually. ‘Fix it!’
‘I’m sorry?’ said Ambit.
Rainbow waved the arm at him. ‘Treat it. Put some ointment on it and wrap it in a bandage. What are you waiting for?’
‘Er, maybe a “please”?’ said Ambit.
‘I shouldn’t even have to ask,’ said Rainbow. ‘I’m in pain.’
‘Diddums,’ Snarl muttered.
‘And I could get an infection,’ Rainbow added, ‘and then you won’t get your reward.’
‘Yeah, speaking of which, when do I get that?’ said Ambit. ‘And is it money?’
‘Just give me some medical attention and we can discuss it later,’ said Rainbow.
‘If it stops you using that voice on me, fine,’ said Ambit and dug in his pack for a bag of bandages and some burn cream. The girl sat primly while he applied it and wrapped up her burn, and then waited with exaggerated patience while he dabbed some on his forehead.
‘Now can we go?’ she asked.
‘I’m sorry, but since when were we travelling together?’ Snarl interrupted. ‘Where do you think we’re going?’
‘As a lady, I expect you to accompany me to the nearest village where I can find some food and civilised company,’ said Rainbow. ‘And when we get there I can give you your reward.’
Ambit and Snarl exchanged glances.
‘Excuse me, but I think Ambit and I should have a quick discussion in private,’ said Snarl.
‘Yeah, right,’ said Ambit, getting up.
‘Fine,’ Rainbow sighed, ‘I will be waiting here. But leave your bag behind. I don’t trust you.’
‘Very wise,’ said Snarl.
She waddled away from the river and into a thicket, which withered away from her to make a passage. Ambit ducked as he followed, and the two of them stopped in a small clearing.
‘Two days travelling with that specimen?’ Snarl said, before Ambit had even finished pulling the bits of twig out of his hair. ‘I would rather jump in the river.’
‘Yeah, I can’t see this being a lot of fun,’ said Ambit, ‘but we’d better do it.’
‘Why?’ said Snarl. ‘We don’t even know what this reward is. I don’t think she knows herself.’
Ambit grinned. ‘I could think of what I’d like it to be.’
‘Very mature,’ said Snarl. ‘I’m not putting up with her so you can get her into bed, Ambit. Anyway, I wouldn’t be surprised if she was wearing a chastity belt under that dress. And we still ne
ed to find out who she is.’
‘All right, here’s an idea,’ said Ambit. ‘We agree to take her back to Spotswood if she tells us who she is and what she’s going to give us in return. Otherwise, we just leave her here.’
‘And if we don’t like the sound of the reward, we say no,’ said Snarl.
‘Right,’ said Ambit, ‘so let’s go back and talk to her.’
‘Agreed,’ said Snarl.
They went back to the river, where Rainbow was busy rearranging her shiny, multicoloured hair.
‘There you are,’ she said immediately. ‘Are you going to help me?’
‘First we need to know a couple of things,’ said Snarl. ‘Such as who you are and what you were doing back there.’
‘And what you’re offering us, if we help you,’ Ambit added.
Rainbow’s mouth went petulant. ‘I’m under no obligation to tell you anything,’ she said. ‘But you can see your reward here.’ She took a moneybag out of the small pouch that hung around her waist, and held it up. ‘I’ll pay you in good demon eyes if you take me to the nearest village. How far is it?’
‘How many eyes have you got?’ Ambit asked immediately.
‘You can have fifty,’ said Rainbow.
‘Two hundred,’ said Ambit.
‘I do not negotiate with commoners,’ said Rainbow. ‘You can have fifty demon eyes.’
‘One hundred, and your real name,’ said Ambit.
‘I will not!’
‘Then you can stay here and do whatever you like,’ said Ambit, picking up his pack.
Rainbow gaped at him. ‘You wouldn’t do that!’
‘Watch us,’ said Ambit. He started to walk off, following the border of demon country, Snarl waddling ahead.
After a short interval, Rainbow came running after them. ‘Wait!’
Ambit slowed down. ‘Yeah?’
Rainbow drew level with him. ‘Have it your way,’ she panted. ‘You can have a hundred demon eyes. And my name is Etarina, but you may not use it in front of other people.’
‘Etarina,’ Ambit repeated. ‘That’s a nice . . . wait a minute. Did you say Etarina? As in . . . Princess Etarina? That Etarina?’
Etarina glared at him. ‘Yes, that Etarina. And perhaps now you know I’m your princess you’ll treat me with a little more respect.’
Snarl stopped to stare at her. ‘Princess Etarina? Out here?’
Ambit had stopped as well. ‘Now I know why you thought you could fuck with demons and get away with it. You ran off, didn’t you?’
‘If you must know, yes,’ said Etarina.
Ambit gave her a look. ‘Why’s that? Didn’t want to marry your cousin? Couldn’t stand having a rich daddy? Palace life too stifling?’
Etarina glared at him. ‘I left to search for someone.’
‘Who?’ said Ambit. ‘Your one true love? Because, you know . . .’ He jiggled an eyebrow at her.
Etarina heaved a theatrical sigh. ‘You have no idea how things are at the capital, do you? We have demons on the doorstep, the royal army is in ruins, and the man who was supposed to save us never came. So I thought if the Chosen One won’t come to us, then I shall go and find him myself.’
Ambit rubbed his scarred hand. ‘And how will you know when you find him?’
‘I’ll know,’ Etarina said confidently. ‘Now that’s enough talk. Start walking.’
‘Right.’ Ambit started walking again, casting a glance at Snarl. ‘And good luck with that.’
Five
A quick check of Ambit’s map showed there was another village not far away, which could be reached if they followed the border of demon country. It would, however, take more than a day to reach.
‘Unless you want to walk in the dark, we’ll have to camp out tonight,’ Ambit told Etarina, which got a typically sniffy response.
‘I have been sleeping under trees since I left the palace,’ she said, ‘and I am tired of it.’
‘What do you want me to do – teleport us to the next village?’ said Ambit. ‘I’m not in charge of distances around here, y’know. Anyway, do me a favour and shut up for a while. I’ve already got a headache, and that voice of yours isn’t helping.’
That had the effect of sending the princess into a sulk, but, since that stopped her talking, Ambit wasn’t going to complain. Snarl, though, kept giving him significant looks which he had to try not to return.
They walked for the rest of that day, ignoring Etarina’s intermittent complaints. Eventually, when it had started to get too dark for walking, they stopped to make camp in a pretty meadow under a large flowering tree. It was a warm night, but Ambit built a fire anyway, and picked some fruit for dinner.
At least Etarina seemed pleased with that. ‘At the palace, we have fresh fruit every night,’ she said.
Ambit sat down close to her, and searched through his pack until he found a small bottle of spirits. ‘How about something to wash it down with?’
Etarina accepted it with a smile. ‘Finally, some good manners. Maybe you aren’t as uncouth as you seem.’
‘I can be nice when I want to be,’ said Ambit. ‘When I meet someone who’s worth it.’
Etarina’s smile turned knowing. ‘And am I worth it?’
‘Oh yes,’ Ambit said solemnly.
Snarl watched the two of them from a safe distance, and then went to dig for her own dinner. By the time she got back, Ambit had succeeded in getting the princess tipsy, which unfortunately had made her giggly. It had, at least, stopped her from harping. ‘And every year we have the Flower Festival, where people come from miles around to watch the goat races and the wrestling matches, and there’s a dance . . . I love dancing, don’t you?’
‘Love it,’ said Ambit. ‘My granddad always said a great fighter should know how to dance – either one means being quick on your feet.’
‘Oh, that’s wonderful,’ said Etarina. She leaned back against him. ‘It’s good to have someone to talk to again. You can’t imagine how hard it is travelling alone, hiding your real identity from everyone.’
‘It must be hard,’ said Ambit, wondering if now was the time to let his hands wander a little bit. ‘But I – ow!’ Snarl had come up beside him and jabbed him in the side with her double-pointed claws.
Ambit rubbed the spot. ‘What?’
‘We need to talk,’ said Snarl. ‘Now.’
‘Oh, fine,’ Ambit sighed. ‘Princess, do you mind?’
‘Not at all,’ she said, moving away to let him get up.
Ambit left the campsite, taking his spear with him and following Snarl’s faint glow until they were safely out of earshot. ‘What?’ he said again. ‘I was right in the middle of something, in case you didn’t notice.’
Snarl reared up on her hind legs, her tail flicking. ‘Ambit, I don’t like where this is going.’
‘Oh, come on. You’ve seen me pull this one a hundred times,’ said Ambit. ‘The sensitive act works every time.’
‘This is different!’ Snarl hissed. ‘She’s the princess! If you fall in love with her, you’ll get pulled into things. You’ll end up saving the day, for her sake. She’ll be kidnapped, or she’ll persuade you to go back to the capital with her, and they’ll find out who you are.’
‘Love?’ Ambit repeated. ‘Me fall in love with her? Are you nuts? She’s a stuck-up harpy with a voice like a knife on a plate!’
‘Opposites attract!’ said Snarl. ‘I heard you two bickering all day.’
‘That’s because she’s obnoxious!’ said Ambit. ‘Trust me, Snarl. I’m not interested.’
‘You looked pretty interested just now,’ said Snarl.
‘That’s because I was planning to have meaningless sex with her,’ said Ambit. ‘Come on, Snarl, this is once in a lifetime. Don’t ruin it for me.’
‘And then what will you do, once you’ve seduced her?’ said Snarl.
‘Take her straight to Daisyfield and ditch her,’ said Ambit. ‘What did you think I was going to do?’
Snarl’s eyes narrowed. ‘I’m warning you, Ambit. If I think this is turning serious, I’ll chase her away myself.’
‘Be my guest, but wait for her to give us the reward first, okay?’ said Ambit.
‘Can do,’ said Snarl. She moved aside to let him pass. ‘Now go on and do your business, you sleaze.’
‘Thank you,’ Ambit said graciously.
He went back to the campsite and found Etarina curled up by the fire. Ambit did his best to make plenty of noise without seeming to, but she didn’t stir, so he gave up and sat down against the tree with a sigh.
‘Damn it, Snarl,’ he muttered.
The next day came, and the three travellers moved on. But now Etarina had decided she liked Ambit, and instead of trailing along in the rear she stuck to his side and asked incessant questions.
‘Where are you from? Where were you going when we met? Where did you get that spear?’
Ambit answered her as charmingly as he could, ignoring Snarl’s disapproving looks, but now the princess had warmed to him a bit, he decided to ask some more questions of his own.
‘So, how d’you know about this Chosen One business?’
‘Don’t be silly. Everyone knows,’ Etarina simpered. ‘My nursemaid told me the story when I was small. The Chosen One will come to Lucknow City and help us fight off the demon army. And then he’ll go to the Nine Mountains and kill the nine demon lords, and after that he will come back to the capital and marry me. My father already promised me to him.’
‘You’d better hope he’s not ugly, then,’ said Ambit.
‘Oh, I know he won’t be,’ said Etarina. ‘He’ll be handsome and brave like you.’
‘Why, is that part of the prophecy?’
‘No, but I’m certain of it,’ said Etarina. ‘I dream about him all the time, and he has the brightest golden eyes and blue striped hair.’
‘That should make finding him easier,’ said Ambit.
‘Yes, of course,’ said Etarina. ‘The prophecy says he’ll come, but it doesn’t say when. I could be an old woman by the time I meet him, and then I’ll be ugly and he won’t want to marry me.’ She was nearly in tears.
