“Yeah, I guess so. What about you? Are you doing okay? You were quiet earlier this week.” Haley looks concerned, her eyes squinting a little as she looks at me as if she can figure out what’s been bugging me all week.
“I had a lot on mind, but I’m okay.” For half a second, I debate on whether to tell her before deciding maybe I need fresh eyes. “My birth mom contacted me.” Haley’s eyes widen. “She wants to reconnect and I’ve been struggling with how to respond to it. My parents told me it was my decision, and they’ll support me either way. I wrote back to tell her I’d meet with her.”
“Are you nervous?”
I glance up at the canopy of branches above us. “Yeah. Wouldn’t you be?”
“At least your family is there for you,” she says softly, turning her head toward the sky as well and tilting it so she rests against my shoulder. “I should go. My mom is probably freaking out since I’ve been ignoring her most of the day. Thanks for letting me hang out.” Haley lifts her head, smiles, and carefully gets out of the hammock.
“I’ll walk you.”
We walk inside so Haley can say goodbye to my mom and then I take her out to her car.
“If you need to escape again, let me know,” I tell her, holding the car door open. “We’re racing tonight if you want to ride with me.”
Her eyes are excited for all of five seconds before she remembers her day. “I’ll let you know, thanks.” She slides into the driver’s seat and I watch her drive away.
Once she’s out of sight, I find Mom in the kitchen where I left her. “What happened with her today?” I ask.
Mom raises an eyebrow at me. “If she didn’t tell you, then neither am I.”
“Mom,” I groan. “Why not?”
“Would you want me to tell her your problems before you were ready to talk about them?” When I don’t say anything, she adds, “That’s what I thought. You didn’t immediately spill your guts about Natalie to her, did you?”
I shake my head. “I see your point.”
I run into Walter first. I mentally brace myself for a smart-ass comment or yelling or something to make me dislike him even more. His eyes look sad though, which makes me wary.
“Are you okay?” he asks, the genuine concern reflecting in his voice.
I shrug my shoulders. I’m not okay, but I’m unsure about trusting him, even though I hear Octavia’s voice in my head that she thinks Walter and Mom are on my side.
“Your mom has been going crazy since your father called.”
I figured he called Mom based on the texts and number of times she’s called me, all of which I ignored except the one I answered when I arrived at Keelan’s. “Where is she?” I ask and she appears behind him, coming down the hall.
I’m expecting her to be pissed, but she rushes to me and hugs me, squeezing me so tightly that I have a hard time catching my breath.
“You could have let me know you were okay! Where have you been all day? Are you okay?” Mom pulls back and pats up and down my arms.
“I was at the courts.” She nods like she should have expected that. “And then I was at a friend’s house. Did you know?” Her sigh and sad eyes are my answer, which enrages me. “How could you not tell me?” I yell. “You’ve known all this time why he was ignoring me and abandoning me and you didn’t tell me? Why didn’t you warn me when I told you I was going to visit?”
“You said he knew you were coming,” she reminds me.
Furious and hurt, I push past her to escape to my room. I feel trapped. I’m stuck where I’m not sure I want to be, where I’m not sure I’m wanted. Did Mom even want me to live with her? Did she get stuck with me because Dad moved on fast with a new family? Somehow, I know any blame should be pointed at Dad. After what happened this morning, Mom was the only one who tried getting in contact with me. Dad never called or texted, even though I had left hurt and angry.
I grab my cell and call him. He probably won’t answer, the chicken. When I hear his voice, I’m shocked.
“Haley, I’m so sorry,” he says.
“Whatever. I don’t care,” I lie, trying my hardest to keep my voice steady. “Not that you care, but I won’t show up or contact you again. You now have one daughter and that’s Carly. I don’t want anything to do with you. As far as I’m concerned, I don’t have a father. That’s all I wanted to say. Bye.” I hang up without giving him a chance to speak. My phone stays in my hand, my gaze trained on it, for the next five minutes.
He doesn’t call back to fix things.
Defeated, I curl into a ball on my bed, hug a pillow to my chest, and let the tears fall. I have no idea how much time passes before my bed dips behind me.
“Sit up, Haley,” Mom says gently. “I want to tell you why we divorced.” Quickly, I sit up to face her. “A few months before I told you we were divorcing, I noticed a change in your father. He no longer seemed like the man I married, the man who was the father of my beautiful daughter. I tried to find out, figure out what was different, but it wasn’t until the day before I told you that I learned a big part of why he was not the same.”
Mom’s voice drops and her eyes close as she softly says, “He was having an affair. I caught him and went to a divorce attorney the next day. I didn’t want to tell you because I knew you looked up to him and no matter what he does, he’s still your father.”
My mouth falls open, ready to speak, but I’m dumbfounded, stuck on what she said. He cheated. What? Why would he do such a thing? How is that even possible? I’m supposed to believe that the man who always drilled into me that if a guy ever cheated on me, I needed to leave him in two seconds flat because he wasn’t a good man, is the same person who cheated on my mom?
“The woman he’s with now, Tonya, was the one he was seeing,” Mom adds quietly. “I really didn’t want to tell you, Haley. In your eyes, your father hung the moon and the stars every night and took them down every morning to hang the sun. He never did anything wrong, and I knew if I told you why, you’d lose that. I never thought he would treat you the way he has.”
This entire time I assumed it was Mom’s fault, because she’s right; I thought Dad could do no wrong, even when he showed me differently time and time again. I’ve been angry with her and Walter, for no real reason.
“I’m sorry,” I choke up the words.
Mom gathers me in a hug. “It’s all right, Haley. I’m still right here, and I’m not going anywhere. If you’d give Walter a chance, he’d be there for you, too.”
“I’ll try.” I sniffle. “He seems like he might be nice.”
“He is.” Mom holds me for a few minutes before she pulls away. “Have you eaten? We can run out for takeout.”
“No, I haven’t. I know of a place where we can go though, if eating out is okay.”
“Of course. Get ready and I’ll tell Walter.” Mom stands and leaves me alone.
Taking a deep breath, I wipe away my tears and make my way to the bathroom. My face doesn’t look too terrible, but I splash cold water on it anyway. After brushing my hair, I walk to the front door, where Walter and Mom are waiting. Mom wraps an arm around my shoulders as we go out to the car. Walter gets into the driver’s seat and then looks over his shoulder at me.
“Where are we going, Haley?”
“There’s a place in town called Elsie’s.”
He nods. “I’ve heard of that place.” He starts backing out and heading toward the diner.
It doesn’t take any time for us to arrive. The air is cool and I welcome the slight chill in the air once we walk inside. The first two times I was here, I didn’t really take in my surroundings; I look around once we take a seat at a bright blue booth. There’s an actual jukebox at one end of the restaurant, and I wonder if it works. I’ll have to ask Keelan.
There’s an old timey feel to the place. The floors are those checkered black and white tiles, and booths line the walls. There are with tables dotted throughout the room, and there is a counter with pies and cakes on display every f
ew seats. The walls are a sunny yellow and have pictures of famous singers from the fifties, sixties, and seventies.
Mrs. Elsie breezes over to our table, walking pretty fast and light on her feet for a woman who has to be in her sixties or seventies. Just like the times I have been here before, her white hair is up in a bun and her glasses are perched low on her nose. She’s wearing bright red lipstick on her thin lips, but it works for her.
“Hello, Haley,” she says, laying menus on the table. “It’s nice to see you again. Who are these fine people with you?”
“Hi, Mrs. Elsie. Meet my mom, Rita, and her husband, Walter. Mom, Walter, this is Mrs. Elsie.”
They say hellos and Mrs. Elsie asks, “How are y’all enjoying the town?”
“We’re loving it so far,” Mom answers with a smile.
“Good. This is a great town. I’ve lived here all my life and wouldn’t dream of living anywhere else.” She glances over her shoulder when someone else walks in. “Do y’all know what you’d like to drink?” We give her our orders. “I’ll whip those up while y’all look over the menu.” Mrs. Elsie swiftly walks away.
My eyes are on the menu when I hear my mother ask, “How does she know your name, Haley? Have you been here before?” I lift my gaze in time to see her look at me.
“Of course, I’ve been here before. That’s why I wanted to come. I’ve been here with a friend and this is where I was supposed to meet Dad Tuesday night.” Luckily, I’ve been MIA after school the past couple of weeks, so it’s entirely plausible that I’d come then and not when I snuck out to see Keelan.
“What do you mean where you were supposed to meet him?”
I glance at Walter. I assumed if he knew, Mom did, too. “He didn’t show,” I answer quietly, staring down at my menu.
Mom is quiet for a few moments before she asks, “The same friend whose house you were at today?”
“Yes.”
“And which friend would that be?”
I sigh, not liking the million questions. “Keelan. You met him after my game.”
Mom frowns. “You’ve been hanging out with a boy?”
“Yes, Mom.” I roll my eyes. “He’s a friend and has a great family. I hung out with his mom more than him today, if it makes you feel better.”
“What would make me feel better is if you would let me know where you are and with whom.”
I don’t get a chance to reply, which is probably for the best, because Mrs. Elsie comes back to take our order. To keep the focus off me, I turn my attention to Walter.
“How’s life, Walter?”
They both seem surprised at me addressing him. I haven’t given him a chance before because I thought he was the reason my parents divorced. Now, I know he’s not the reason. I told Mom I’d give him a chance, ans I will. Whether I like him afterward or not remains to be seen.
Walter begins talking about his job, and I’m quickly bored. He’s an accountant. I’m not sure what could be appealing about it. My eyes have glazed over when he says, “So, you know I’m good with numbers. If you need help in math this semester, let me know.”
I’m surprised he knows I have math this semester, so all I can do is smile and thank him for the offer. Dinner is surprisingly easygoing as we talk about school, their jobs, and when they ask about my friends, I make sure to talk about Jess, Cam, and Keelan. During our meal, I also notice how smitten Mom is with Walter and he with her. I mean I know they’re married now, but I never paid attention to things like Walter smiling when Mom is rambling about something. Or their little touches. They’re in love, that’s for sure.
When we return to the house, Mom asks, “Do you want to watch a movie with us?”
“No, thanks,” I reply, hurrying to the seclusion of my room. I hope she doesn’t think that I’m going to hang out with them all the time now. That is so not the case.
Today has lasted forever, it seems, and I’m exhausted. My throat aches with more unshed tears as I think about my morning as I change clothes. My dad and his cheating ways are the last thing I want to think about, so I crawl into bed, wondering if it’s too early to fall asleep. My phone chimes with a text, so I grab it from my nightstand.
Keelan: Wanna ride with me tonight?
My heart begins to pump erratically in my chest. My fingers are replying before I can even think about it.
Me: Yes. What time do I need to be ready?
Riding in his car when he sped down Dead Man’s Curve was like nothing else I’d ever experienced. After today, I’m dying to feel that adrenaline rush and to see what it’s like when they race. There’s no way I can say no.
Keelan: Two hours. I’ll text you when I get there.
Me: Can’t wait! :D
Keelan: Me either.
Keelan: Don’t wear a VT shirt, or you can’t ride. ;)
Me: Haha, deal!
I set my phone aside. I have two hours to put myself back together. First, I hop in the shower, taking nearly forty-five minutes as I quadruple check there’s not a hair left on my legs. Then I spend way too long shifting through the shirts in my closet for something to wear. There’s a knock on my door right when I find a cute red top. Thankfully, I haven’t changed yet.
“Who is it?” I call.
“Mom,” she replies.
I tighten my hold on my towel, take a step toward my dresser where my pjs are stored, and say, “Come in.”
She opens the door with a soft smile. “Getting ready for bed?” I nod. “Us too. We’re more tired than we thought. I wanted to check on you and make sure you’re still doing okay.”
“Yeah, Mom. I’m fine. His loss, right?”
I regret my words the moment she tilts her head at me with a touch of pity and sadness. “Exactly.” Mom comes over and hugs me tightly. “We love you.” I want to roll my eyes at how even now, when she’s telling me she loves me, she has to include Walter.
“I love you too, Mom.”
She leaves and I change into a pair of shorts and the red top. I lotion my legs, and then I mutter, “Crap.” If I blow dry my hair this late, Mom will hear it. She might get suspicious. I don’t usually dry it if I take a shower at night. Dang it. Thinking quickly, I run my brush through it before running my fingers through it in an effort to give it more body. My hair retains water, I swear, so it’s like deadweight until it starts drying. I grab a hairband to help as well.
I debate applying makeup, but figure it’s already obvious I’ve taken a shower. I don’t want to look like I’m trying to impress Keelan, which I’m totally not, so I decide against it. For the remaining time, I read until Keelan texts me.
Sneaking out my window is as easy as before, but my heart is hammering twice as much this time. It picks up speed when I see Keelan at the end of my driveway, leaning against the passenger door of his car. God, the boy is hot. He’s not even trying either. He’s wearing a regular t-shirt, shorts, and tennis shoe, yet, I still want to kiss him as if he was standing before me in a suit.
His grin sets my blood on fire and his eyes run up and down my body as he blindly reaches out for the door handle. “Hey, Hales.”
“Hey,” I smile. “Do you need help?” I perk an eyebrow as he snaps out of it and looks for the handle.
“You got jokes tonight, huh?”
I giggle softly before getting in, and I have to remind myself we need to get out of here as soon as possible.
“Are you ready for this?” Keelan asks once he’s in the driver’s seat.
“So, so ready.”
I park on the left side of the road since Alan, the guy I’m racing, is on the right. The moon is full and bright tonight, allowing Haley to see the scene. There isn’t a shoulder, so it’s not like those who came to watch can park off to the side. Instead, they are piled into the bed of trucks, like Cam’s, which are parked where the tractors can turn into the fields. There are some in intervals, all the way to the imaginary finish line.
“Will we get caught?” she asks, her head turning so her e
yes land on me.
“It’s unlikely. This road is barely used as it is and we’re so close to the county line, we could cross over and the cops would be out of luck. No one has ever been caught before. C’mon.”
We get out of the car, and I walk around to the front.
“What’s this?” Alan asks. “Does Keelan Moore have a chick riding with him? I don’t believe it.”
I laugh and playfully shove his shoulder. “Shut up.” Alan is from a neighboring high school, so I introduce him to Haley. “This is Haley, and yeah, she’s riding with me.”
Alan sweeps his eyes over her as she softly tells him hello. “When Keelan loses, you’re free to ride with me,” he grins at her. She only raises an eyebrow at him.
“All right, let’s stop with the chit chat and get this going,” Cam says.
The few people hanging around begin walking down to where they’ll watch, and we get back in our cars. There’s only one guy left, Tom, as Cameron heads to the finish line where he’ll record a video on his phone in case he needs help judging who wins. We buckle up and start the engines. I glance at Haley to see her grinning.
“Excited, Hales?”
“Oh my God, yes.”
I laugh. Tom makes sure our cars are relatively even and lined up. He checks his phone, which is likely a text from Cam, saying he’s ready.
“Three!” Tom begins to shout. “Two! One!”
We take off as I smoothly shift gears. We can hear the cheer of people as we zoom by them. Alan and I are neck in neck. My stomach bottoms out when we go over the first hill. Part of me wants to close my eyes and relish in the feel of the engine, the steering wheel, the gearshift underneath my hand, and the sensation of going so fast over these hills. I don’t, of course.
We’re approaching the curve and the invisible finish line fifty feet ahead of it. I press harder on the gas, wanting to secure the win, especially in front of Haley, and take a deep breath as I pass where Cam is recording on his phone. I think I won, but I was focused on staying on my side of the road, so I’m not confident yet. I immediately downshift and hit the brakes, making it where we’ll stop just before we reach the deadly curve.
Bending Under Pressure Page 5
