“Okay, okay. That’s enough. Stop the car,” Keelan orders.
“One more time.” He tilts his head, his lips part to say no. “Please?” I add.
With much reluctance, he nods. I run over the steps in my head. I remind myself that I can do this.
“Stop thinking about it so much, Hales.” He touches my left thigh. “Use the clutch.” His fingers brush over the hand on the steering wheel. “Feel what the engine is trying to tell you.” He rests his hand over mine on the gearshift. “Shift like you’re a pro.” Keelan leans over and presses a kiss to my head. “Stop thinking. Drive the rest of the way like normal and then circle back.”
My lungs shiver with a shaky breath, and I nod. I experience zero issues as I drive my way around to where we began. I stop briefly, not wanting to overthink it, and then press the gas. The car lurches forward. The steering wheel hums as the engine roars, surely waking up the neighborhood if they were close enough to hear it. I shift into second, then third, then fourth, and then fifth. My stomach falls endlessly as we fly over the hills.
“Oh my god! I did it!” I shout once it hits me.
Keelan laughs. “Good job, Hales.”
I see the sign for the curve and begin to slow. My heart is stuttering in my chest, the blood rushing throughout my body as fast as we were just going. I wish I could speed all the time. Never before have I disobeyed speed limits by more than nine miles over. Yet, here I am, reaching ninety on this stretch of road where the speed limit is only forty-five. There’s nothing I’ve experienced quite as thrilling as zooming down the road like that.
Well, except for kissing Keelan. I want to stop to kiss him now, but he speaks before I can do such a thing.
“Go again,” Keelan tells me.
“Really?”
“Yeah. You can’t do it just once.”
He could’ve told me he loved me for as much as I’m smiling. I begin to circle around once more. My hands are trembling slightly, so I grip tighter. There’s that much adrenaline coursing through me. Keelan lets me run it three more times. Each time, I get better and more fluid like he is. I’m oddly tired when I park in my driveway, unable to stop my yawn.
“I’d much rather watch you than Cam drive my car,” Keelan says, making me giggle.
“Do I get a reward for eventually doing so well?”
I barely finish my question before Keelan has hooked his hand around my neck to pull me closer to his lips. I don’t know what it is about that one little action, but it melts me every time. But I must be more tired than I thought because when I part my mouth, it turns into a yawn.
“Sorry,” I laugh sheepishly. Ugh. How embarrassing is that?
“It’s okay.” He’s still smiling, so that’s a good sign. Keelan gets out, walks around, and opens my door for me.
“Thanks for tonight.”
“Thank you for today.” He leans down to kiss me once one last time. “Go sleep, Hales. I’ll text you tomorrow.”
Monday comes and Cameron and Jess have not made up yet. She apologized to me, which is a plus. However, it makes lunch extremely awkward. They both keep sneaking glances at each other. They look miserable, though I’m surprised it’s Cameron who is doing his best to not look miserable. Jess has barely spoken a word all day. However, Cameron has been talking to everyone but Jess.
In another matter, I’ve been a nervous wreck all day. Will Dad show at my game today? Will he be too busy? What if he does? Will he want to go to dinner afterward? Or will he leave? What if he tries to push me to meet his new family again? Will he be proud if I win my matches? Or disappointed if I lose them?
“Haley.” Hearing Keelan say my name snaps me out of my thoughts as I turn in my seat to face him. “Stop worrying.”
“I can’t.” Today is one of those days where I wish he didn’t have football practice. He can’t come to my match as support. With Jess giving everyone the silent treatment, I don’t exactly have her. I told Mom and Walter not to make this one since Dad is supposed to come.
“If practice lets out in time, I’ll drive by to see if you’re still playing,” he offers. Considering we’re playing our rivals this Friday, I doubt they will get out early.
“Thanks.”
The rest of the day flies by with my stomach in knots. As players begin to arrive at the courts, so do some parents. Tennis isn’t huge like football, so we don’t get crowds, but parents try to come watch if they can. We’re warming up when I see Octavia and John taking a seat on the bench Cameron and Keelan usually take.
I quickly jog over with a forced smile because Dad still hasn’t arrived. “What are y’all doing here?”
“I hope you don’t mind that we decided to come watch you. We were told you could use a little support today.”
Keelan.
I can’t wait until I can give him the biggest hug ever.
“Thank you.”
“Quit yapping, Haley, and warm up!” Coach Spell yells.
So, I do.
When it comes time for my first match, I glance around once more. Dad isn’t here. He’s stood me up. Again. Smiles from Octavia and John make me feel a little better. I can’t feel too much better. My dad has let me down. Again.
That’s it.
I’m done with him.
He’s stomped all over his last chance and ruined it. I won’t give him another one. I’ll go home, avoid Mom and Walter for as long as possible so I don’t have to tell them, and then let the tears I’m dying to cry fall.
My heart isn’t in it as I spin my racquet, my opponent calling ‘d’ over ‘p’. It falls, showing a ‘d’ at the bottom of the handle. The brand of my racquet starts with a P, but it being lower case, allows us to call either. Since she called it, she gets to serve first. All I want to do is go home. However, I can’t. With a deep breath, I rock on my feet left and right as I bend my knees to prepare for her serve.
The thing I love about tennis is that, as with the books I read, I can lose myself in it. My mind shuts out my problems, my disappointment, my hurt, and my anger. I can shift that focus toward my game. The girl I’m playing today isn’t that good. Not to be mean or conceited, but sometimes, we get matches where it’s not evenly matched. I’ve been the girl deemed ‘not that good’ based on whoever was standing on the other side of the net.
Because of this, our match is quick. She messes up on her serves, the balls landing outside of the lines, or she misses the returns. If she does make the return, they don’t stay in play when she hits it back to me. We only truly rally once throughout our match. Jess and I should have no problem taking her and the number two seed in doubles.
I halt mid-step when I turn to wait for Jess’s match to finish. There, standing on the other side of the fence, is my dad.
He showed.
He was late.
But he came.
I rush off the courts and around to where he is.
“Dad!” I throw my arms around him, feeling his torso shake with his laugh.
“Hey. I’m sorry I was late.”
“It’s okay. I’m just glad you’re here.” I hug him tighter, finding it hard to believe he’s here. He feels like he always did. He smells the same, like Old Spice. Right now, it’s hard to think that this person who looks, smells, and feels the same has acted differently from the person I loved.
“Me too, Haley.” He drops his arms from around me and I’m forced to let go as well. “You played well, though you weren’t playing someone with your skills. Your play at the net has improved.”
I grin. “Thanks. Coach Spell has been working my volleys hard.” Taking a deep breath, I hesitate asking my next question. What if he disappoints me again? “Are you staying after my game? We can go eat at Elsie’s.”
“It’s a long drive back, Haley.”
He’s right. It’s a two-hour drive. I nod. “Okay.”
“Haley!” Coach Spell yells. “Come here.”
Jess has finished her match, so we’ll be starting our doubles
in a few minutes. Dad won’t be staying for dinner, but I can’t be too upset over it. He did show up. That’s the least I could ask for. Maybe there’s hope that we can go back to the way things used to be.
I sure hope so.
Thursday night, I’m sitting at home, relaxing in my room, and texting Haley. Her impatience and eagerness for another race makes me smile. However, Cameron usually sets them up; with him still on the outs with Jess, he hasn’t felt like it. The only reason they aren’t talking is that neither of them is willing to make the move first. Cam has told me to leave him alone about it, so I have.
I kind of wish he would go ahead and do something though. He refuses to tell Mom or Dad what’s going on, only that he and Jess had an argument. Dad is even more worried since Cam was willing to talk to him before it happened, but not afterward. I get why he doesn’t want to, but I also hate seeing them worry.
My phone vibrates and I pick it up, expecting a text from Haley.
Nope.
It’s not from her.
Natalie: Hey. I was wondering if you’d like to drive over to meet your aunt and spend Saturday with us?
I guess it is time.
Keelan: Sure. I’ll double check with my parents. Text me the address, so I’ll know where to go; I know Mom will want it, too.
Part of me is making sure I say ‘my parents’ and ‘Mom’ because I want to remind her who raised me. Remind her that she doesn’t have any leverage over me. However, part of it is simply because what else am I supposed to call them? They are my parents: my mom and dad.
When she texts me the address, I go down to the living room where Mom and Dad are sitting next to one another on the couch. Mom is resting her head on Dad’s shoulder and they look happy. Cam and I are adopted and everyone knows we are, and I’ve always thought it was cool that our skin is different colors just like our parents. If someone didn’t know, they could assume my complexion came from Mom while Cam’s from Dad. It’s always made me feel as if we were even more of a family.
“Did you come to watch the show with us?” Mom asks as I take a seat in the recliner, popping up the footrest to get comfortable.
“Kinda. Natalie wants me to drive out there to meet her sister and hang out with them on Saturday.” I pull up the address in the GPS on my phone, knowing what her next question will be.
“How far away would you have to drive?”
“A little over an hour.”
Mom glances to Dad. They don’t really like me driving more than the forty-five minutes to some of the surrounding towns that actually have places to go. I’m surprised when Mom nods and says, “Just be careful and be home before dark.”
I bet that if I wanted to go that far with Haley or Cameron, she’d say no in a heartbeat. But because it’s my birth mom, she’s saying yes. Hopefully, things will go okay. I talk to Keira more than Natalie because she texts me a lot. There’s always a handful of texts, or one long text, waiting for me when I finish at football practice where Keira is telling me about her day and asking about mine.
Haley: Hey, did you know how to do #5 from science homework? Don’t you want to help me? :D
Crap. Science homework. I forgot.
Me: Haven’t done it yet. Hold on and we’ll figure it out.
I head back upstairs, the rest of my night spent on the phone doing homework with Haley. I have to say, it’s not a bad way to spend my time.
Rival games always bring out the most crowds. Everyone who usually attends our home games is here, plus everyone who has even a little bit of school spirit in them. You’ll never find a game with higher attendance, even if we are the away team. Mom, Dad, Haley, and Jess are here, even though Jess and Cameron still aren’t speaking to each other. If they keep it up, I may have to intervene.
We’re already standing on the sidelines as the other team breaks through the banner their cheerleaders are holding and rush out onto the field. Their fans go crazy, stomping on the bleachers, cheering at the top of their lungs, and clapping their hands. Our fans, the adults that they are, boo as loudly as possible. The noises clash into one another to create one loud sound that mixes together.
Cameron is standing next to me; his eyes glued to the fifty-yard line as his hands grip the neck of his shoulder pads. At least he’s focused. While we’ve only lost one game, our rivals have lost two. It gives us a slight edge. We definitely don’t want to lose this one, so we have even more motivation. Coach has already crawled down our throats like this is the State Championships or something. It sure is as important as one around here.
A steady huff of air exhales from my lungs. The pressure sits tight on my chest, constricting even more knowing the people I care about are in the stands watching. I don’t want to let them down, and I don’t want to let my coach or teammates down either. On top of that, no one wants to have an early practice tomorrow as punishment for losing.
After the coin toss, the game gets underway. The cacophony of the crowd nearly becomes too much for my ears, so I try to block it out. The football players in front of me in their blue and white jerseys are much more important. Cam is flawless tonight. I almost wonder if he’s doing so well because he’s trying to show off for Jess. Trying to understand them, however, is beyond my abilities.
It’s a fast paced, back and forth kind of game. It ends up coming down to the wire, those torturous last few minutes where we try to keep our lead. Hopefully, if we win, we can pack up and get out of here. Last year, a group of guys got into a fight. They were fans from each school and it was stupid. I love football as much as the next person, but I’m not going to get into a fight with our rivals. The game is important, but it’s not worth all of that.
We hold our lead, the crowd cheering louder than they would have been if we’d been at home. I’m tired, sweaty, and ready for a shower. Because it’s an away game, once Coach talks to us, we’re back on the bus to the high school. I was hoping to see Haley later tonight, but I think I’m too tired. I’ll have to make it up to her tomorrow.
“Text me when you get there. If you make any stops along the way, text me to let me know. You have your GPS already set up on your phone, right?” Mom asks.
“Yes. It’s only an hour drive, Mom. I’m not going to Richmond or D.C. by myself.”
She’s been fussing over me for the past twenty minutes, and she’s really starting to annoy me. It’s her fault I’m going because she told me I could!
“Text me when you leave, too,” she adds, ignoring everything I just said.
“Yes, ma’am,” I reply to satisfy her.
Mom hugs me, kisses my cheek, and I’m finally able to leave the house. I make sure to set up my GPS, placing my phone in my lap, and then find a good radio station to listen to before I leave the driveway. Natalie has only texted me once today to make sure I was still coming. Even through those messages, I got a sense that she was really excited. It’s throwing me off. Why is it such a big deal? I don’t think she was as excited for me to meet Kiera as she seems to be for me to meet my aunt.
It’s put me on edge more so than usual where Natalie is involved. The plus, of course, is that Keira will be there. Her dance was earlier this week, but she said it was too much recap in a text and she doesn’t like talking on the phone. She’s supposed to tell me all about it today.
The hour drive seems to pass quickly. Traffic isn’t bad at all. My phone directs me to take a left, instructing me that my destination is on the right ahead. I frown when I realize my destination is a white community building where row after row of cars are parked. This can’t be the right place. It’s not a home, which is what I’m expecting. There are people milling around the entrance to the building and even more walking that way. I find a place to park and recheck the address Natalie sent me. I glance to the sign for the building.
The numbers match.
How is this where I’m supposed to be?
I call Mom and she answers on the second ring.
“Is everything okay, Keelan? You w
ere supposed to text.”
“I don’t know if I’m in the right spot,” I tell her.
“What do you mean? You’re lost?”
“Not according to the address Natalie gave me. I’m at a community building and there’s a bunch of people here.” My stomach drops when I see Keira jogging my way. I glance around at all the people, hugging, laughing, and seeming happy to see one another. “Mom, I think she lied to me.”
“What are you talking about, Keelan?” Her voice is stern like she’s about to chastise me, but I know it’s just from where her frustration.
“I’m saying I think she’s bombarding me with a freaking family reunion!” I snap. There is no way I want to meet all these people! “Hold on; Kiera is about to say something.” I get out of my car just as she approaches with a smile on her face. “What is this?” I ask, not giving her a chance to speak.
Her smile falls. “Mom didn’t tell you?”
“Tell me what?” I grit.
“She wanted you to meet more of the family. She said she told you it was a reunion.”
“Keelan,” Mom’s voice sounds in my ear. She must have heard what Kiera said. “You’re already there. Stick close to Keira if you want. Give it an hour before you come home.”
“But—” I start; no, I shouldn’t have to stay when I was in no way expecting to meet what looks to be fifty people or more.
“I know, and I’d be angry too, but I’m telling you what I want you to do. Once you’re on the way home, I will have a conversation with Natalie and handle it, okay?”
I groan. “Fine.”
“I love you.”
“Love you too.” I hang up and stuff my phone into my pocket.
Bending Under Pressure Page 16
