Michael was just ahead of me. Just great and gravy.
I pretended not to see him and found a seat as far away from him as possible. If I had found it difficult to concentrate before; now it was impossible. My eyes were continually drawn to him. It was easy for Marla to say just ignore him. She wasn’t me.
Something would have to give. I sighed heavily and strove to tame my unruly thoughts.
No, at this rate, I would never get over him.
And that was unfair to Daniel.
And to me.
Chapter 26—Uncle Howard
When I arrived home, I was hot and sweaty. I got a wash pan and cool water, sponged off and changed my clothes. Aunt Liza fixed us a glass of iced tea, and we sat on the front porch, using square cardboard fans from church to help keep us cool.
“How did today go?” she asked.
“Fine.” I pushed back a strand of damp hair.
“Fine? Tell me all about it.” She took a sip of her iced tea.
“Michael was there. He’s in one of my classes.” I rolled the tea glass across my hot forehead.
“I wonder why he’s in a freshman class. That seems strange.”
It did seem strange now that she mentioned it. Did he make a note of my class and sneak in just to be near me? Part of me flushed with excitement at the thought. Part of me was annoyed. I groaned and covered my face with my fan.
“Jay, are you okay?”
I waved a hand. “Fine. It’s just hard.”
She leaned forward, her unique vanilla scent surrounding me. She pushed my fan away from my face. “Are your classes too hard?”
“No, my classes are fine. I meant life is hard. I can’t get over Michael, no matter how hard I try ...”
“Sweetie, you need to resolve this.” She surveyed me solemnly.
We remained silent for a few minutes.
I made an effort to lower my hands to my lap. Chance came to me and laid his head on my knee. I rubbed him, and he whimpered softly. “Maybe it was a mistake to come back. I should have moved in with Momma. Stayed as far away from Michael as I could.”
Aunt Liza shook her head vehemently. “Don’t say that, Jay! Look at what opportunities have opened for you. You’re only sixteen, and you’re in college with a scholarship. You will be one of the first women veterinarians to graduate. I think you’re where you need to be.”
“But Michael is making me miserable ...”
“You’re letting him make you miserable. There’s a difference.”
“But I don’t know how to forget him. I’ve tried ...” My voice broke. I twisted away and blinked back tears.
“All this stress is hard on you. It’ll get better. Wait and see.”
“I hope so, but I don’t see how.”
She patted my back. “Why don’t you go write Dan a letter? Or, go for a ride? Just put Michael out of your mind.”
“I’ll write Daniel when I finish my homework. I’ve got a ton of it.” I rose and planted a kiss on her forehead before going in.
When I finished my homework, I did write Daniel a long letter, longer than I planned. I told him I felt overwhelmed but decided not to go into details about Michael.
In a few days I received a letter in response. Daniel said it was such a warm September that we could take a trip to the beach. He was sure it would cheer me up.
I’d never been to the beach, and it seemed like a perfect getaway. Daniel urged me to invite Marla, Andrew, Anne, and Tommy.
Aunt Liza gave me permission but only if the others were going with us.
I walked over to Marla’s with Chance. The sun bore down, the thick canopy of leaves doing little to cool me from the oppressive heat.
Marla sat on a bench under a large oak with Grace. Marla seemed so serene with her head bent slightly down, checking Grace’s homework. The tilt of her head reminded me of a painting we had seen at school of a French mother washing her child. Marla and Grace were a living imitation of the painting.
When Grace finally took her homework and went in to wash up for supper, I moved closer to Marla. “I came over to ask you a question.”
Marla turned her full attention to me. “Yes?”
“Do you think your parents would let you go to the beach with us — Daniel and me?” I watched her anxiously, wondering if she thought it would be a good idea.
“It sounds like fun. I’ll ask tonight and let you know.”
“Okay. And, can you see if the others want to go, too?”
“Andrew’s coming over later. I’m sure he’ll want to go, and he can ask Ann and Tommy, too.
“Good! I’ll see you tomorrow then.” I whistled for Chance.
He stayed on my heels all the way home. I walked to the barn to tend the horses before heading back to the house. Chance ran ahead of me, barking at squirrels and chasing them up the trees.
As I neared the back porch, Uncle Howard came out of the house, holding a bottle in his hand.
“Hi, Uncle Howard.”
He startled and hid the bottle behind his back. “Oh hi, Jay.” He stepped backwards toward his shop. “Just going to my shop,” he mumbled.
I caught my breath. Michael had meant Uncle Howard. Sadness draped over me. Somehow, I would have to get Uncle Howard help.
I’d ask Daniel — maybe he’d know what to do.
I went into the house and looked around the kitchen, disoriented for a moment. Then I knew why. Aunt Liza had not started supper. I went to look for her. She was in the bedroom with the curtains pulled. One arm hid her eyes.
“Aunt Liza? Are you okay?”
She raised herself on one elbow. “No, I have a sick headache. Jay, can you make supper for you and Howard?”
“Yes, ma’am. Is there anything you need?”
“No, child. If I can get some sleep, I’ll feel better tomorrow.”
“Call me if you need me.”
“I will.” She rolled away from me.
I quietly closed the door and tiptoed to the kitchen. As I prepared supper, I reflected. If she had found out about Uncle Howard, that might be why she had a migraine.
I shook my head. Men! They were all alike.
When I had finished supper, I called Uncle Howard in from his shop, but I didn’t eat with him. I carried my plate to my room, using my homework as an excuse.
Marla came over the next afternoon, her eyes bright. “Momma and Poppa told me I could go. I’ve already talked to Andrew and Anne, and they have permission also.”
I was in the swing on the front porch, and I let my feet scrape against the floorboards.
“You don’t look too happy.” Marla sat down in a chair beside the swing.
I didn’t want to tell her about Uncle Howard. I cast around for something else. “Um ... I don’t have a bathing suit and no money to buy one.”
“I believe my mother has an old one. I think it will fit you.”
“Really? You don’t think she would mind if I borrowed it?”
“She’ll probably give it to you. I don’t think it fits her anymore.”
I smiled my thanks. “Good. I’ll write Daniel and tell him we all want to go.”
Uncle Howard opened the front door and stuck his head out. “Jay ... Oh, sorry, I didn’t know you had company.” He opened the door wider and stepped out. “Hello, Miss Phillips. How’re you doing today?”
“Fine.”
“Fine as frog hair split three ways,” I said listlessly.
“What did you say?” Marla asked.
“Oh, nothing. It’s just something my poppa used to say.” And Michael. Hadn’t he once said that? A pang pierced me. If only Poppa were here, he could help me deal with Uncle Howard and Michael, tell me what I should do.
Uncle Howard beamed at us. “Ladies, I’ve got a job. I’ve got to go get some measurements. I wanted to let Jay know where I’d be.”
“What kind of job?” I asked.
“I’ll be making a few chairs, a table, and a couple of other things. Maybe this
time it’ll work out. Keep your fingers crossed.” He disappeared back into the house.
“I’ve got to get going, too. Night!” Marla bounded down the steps.
I only had time enough to call “goodnight” before she disappeared. I rose and stretched, then went inside to begin my homework, praying that Uncle Howard would be able to do this job without drinking.
Chapter 27—Beach Trip
Daniel picked me up early on Saturday morning. We drove to Marla’s house where Marla and Andrew were already waiting on the front steps.
“Hi,” I said. “Where’s Anne and Tommy?”
They didn’t answer, just exchanged a look, before climbing into the backseat.
It wasn’t until Daniel pulled into the street that Marla spoke. “They’re going to ride with Michael and Sylvia.”
“Michael and Sylvia?” My mouth fell open, and I twisted in my seat to get a better look at her face.
Marla shot me a look of apology. “Andrew was talking to Sylvia and let the cat out of the bag.”
We both frowned at Andrew.
He shrugged. “She kinda invited herself. It’s a free country. I can’t stop them from going. What’s the big deal anyway?” He ground his teeth, his eyes angry.
Marla had probably been chewing him out. “It’s not a big deal. The more, the merrier,” I said bitterly.
Marla whispered to him in the back, and Andrew raised a voice in protest followed by an “Ouch.” Marla probably pinched him.
“Really, Marla, it’s not a problem.” I set my face in a determined smile. I’d have fun no matter who was there.
But wasn’t the whole idea of the trip to help me forget about Michael? Somehow, I’d just have to stay as far away from him as possible.
We arrived at the beach, and there was no sign of the others. Maybe they had changed their minds.
Marla and I wore our bathing suits under our dresses. Daniel and Andrew walked down to the beach while Marla and I stayed in the car to peel our dresses off. Literally, we had to peel. The high humidity had our dresses sticking to us.
Marla wore sandals, but I didn’t have a pair. I took my shoes off and left them in the car before we followed Daniel and Andrew down to the beach.
Daniel let out a low whistle when he saw us. “You girls look beautiful.”
His eyes swept over both of us but lingered a moment longer on Marla. She wore a blue bathing suit that matched her eyes. The sun reflected off her golden curls.
I, on the other hand, wore an old-fashioned black suit. The neckline was high and the bottom of the suit covered half my thighs. I’m sure when the suit had been new, Marla’s mom had worn black stockings with it. My legs and feet were bare.
No other people were on the beach. Probably September was late in the year for most beach goers. We spread out our blankets, and Marla and I stretched out on one of them.
Both Andrew and Daniel wore dark trunks and dark tank tops. They removed the tank tops before splashing into the water.
Marla’s gaze followed Daniel. “Wow. He’s so muscular. He looks really strong,” she whispered to me.
“That’s what the army will do for you.”
Marla laughed. “I’ll see if I can get Andrew to join when we graduate.”
I nodded, casting around for something nice to say about Andrew. He looked skinny next to Daniel. I decided not to say anything.
I laid back and closed my eyes. The sun bore down relentlessly. It reminded me of the story Poppa told Zeke and me.
The Indians had loved the sun so much they asked God to let it shine all the time. God did, and the plants grew in profusion making it difficult to even walk. The people could not sleep.
I must have slept, though. I dreamed the vines intertwined about me, cutting off my breath.
Marla poked me in the ribs, and I sat up.
“They’re here,” she whispered.
“Hey,” Anne called.
Marla and I stood up, brushing the sand away.
Anne looked cross, and even Tommy’s normally good-natured face had a frown, although he lit up when he saw us.
“You girls look great.”
Marla blushed, and I felt my own cheeks grow warm.
Anne had on a modest suit, similar to Marla’s. She and Tommy continued on to the water’s edge.
Sylvia approached with Michael trailing behind her. She had a thin covering over her suit, some kind of garment I’d never seen before that clung to her curves.
“Hi, girls,” she said, the edge of her lips barely lifting.
“Hi, Sylvia, Michael,” Marla said. “Did you have any trouble finding us?”
“No,” Michael said, smiling. “We saw Daniel’s car and knew we were at the right place.”
“He has a gorgeous car,” Sylvia said. This time her lips made it into a smile. She turned to Michael. “Going in?”
She reached to the hem of the covering and skimmed it over her head.
Marla gasped, and I think I did, too. Sylvia’s suit, in two pieces, bared her midriff. Her suit revealed almost her entire leg. The material clung to every curve, just as the covering had, and the top dipped low.
I threw Michael a covert glance to see his reaction. His forehead was furrowed, whether from the glare of the sun or another emotion, I didn’t know. Without speaking, he sprinted the short distance and dove into the water.
Sylvia followed to the water’s edge at a leisurely pace. The waves broke at her feet. She motioned to Michael, and he came to her. I don’t think she was expecting his reaction. He grasped her elbow and escorted her down the beach. Sylvia’s voice, shrill above the pounding waves, reached to us. I heard, “What do you think you are doing?” and “Let go of me.”
I felt like we were eavesdropping. “Come on, Marla.” I rushed down the sloped sand and into the waves. Anne and the boys met us, splashing and chasing us. Daniel caught me in his arms.
“Let’s swim out farther,” he whispered in my ear.
“What? I don’t want to go out farther.” This was my first trip to the ocean. I felt safe here near the shore. I didn’t want to get away from its safety.
“There’s a section where the water isn’t over our heads. We can swim out to a place where the waves are not breaking.” He pointed. “See? The water won’t be as deep there.”
“Okay. I’ll see if the others want to swim that far out.”
He reached out a hand as if to stop me but let it drop back on the water. I splashed over to Marla and Anne.
“Daniel and I are going to swim out farther. Do y’all want to?”
“Are you crazy, Jay?” Tommy said. “I’m not going out any deeper than my waist.”
“Daniel says the water’s not as deep a little farther out.” I pointed to the spot.
Both girls shook their heads. Tommy and Andrew also refused to go.
I made my way back to Daniel. “They don’t want to go.”
“Good. Just you and me then.”
“I don’t want to go.”
“You just said you would.”
“I meant I wanted to go if the others went.”
“You don’t trust me, Jay?”
I let my eyes drift around us. Michael had left Sylvia on the shore and splashed in our direction. I turned back to meet Daniel’s eyes. “I trust you. Let’s go.”
Daniel led the way, grasping my hand. When the water reached my chin, I dove, following in Daniel’s wake, swimming beneath the waves. The salt water burned my eyes and all was blurry, but I managed to keep him in sight.
When he stopped in front of me, my feet sought to find a solid surface but only found water. Daniel caught me and pulled me close to him.
He laughed. “I’m sorry. I forgot you were shorter. Let’s move a little farther out. I don’t think it’s as deep right over there.”
He towed me a short distance until I was able to feel the sand beneath me. My chin touched the water’s surface.
I looked back toward the shore and saw we wer
en’t as far out as I thought. The emerald green water lapped around us gently instead of crashing over us as the waves did closer to the shore.
“It is nice out here.” A few white feathery clouds edged the blue sky. Birds spread their wings overhead.
He smiled and raised an eyebrow. “It sure is.”
Then, he dove under the water. He popped back up with a shell in his hand. “Check this out.” He handed me the shell.
“Wow. That’s beautiful.” I flipped it in my hands, admiring the perfect swirls.
“I’ll see if I can find more.” He dove back under.
I spotted Sylvia again, still walking along the edge of the water, but now with Andrew beside her.
How did Marla feel about that? Marla and Anne were sitting on the blanket. Tommy was still in the water, the waves crashing over him, sometimes knocking him off his feet. I didn’t see Michael anywhere.
Daniel resurfaced. “Two more.”
“Nice. Do you know what I’d like to do?”
A smile played around his lips as he shook his head.
“I want to float on my back, but I’m afraid I’ll float away.”
“I’ll hold you. You can trust me.”
I nodded. “I know.” I let myself fall back into the water, my legs rising. I bobbed like a cork.
Daniel’s hand closed around my left wrist. “I’ve got you. You can float all you want.”
“Thanks.” I watched the sea birds flying overhead. Their calling and the sound of the waves soothed me. All my tension melted away. I wished I could sleep like this, supported by the waves, held by Daniel. Like floating on the cream as the butter made instead of endlessly swimming. The waves gently bobbed me up and down.
And then Daniel’s hand slipped from my wrist, and I drifted away.
Chapter 28—The Ocean
I floundered for a moment, my head ducking beneath the waves. I came up coughing and sputtering. Daniel grabbed my arm and pulled me until I found my footing again. I raked my hair out of my eyes, and Michael gazed at me solemnly, his eyes slightly unfocused.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to bump into y’all. Can’t see a thing in this salty water.”
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