She glanced down. He refused her that right, tucking his fingers under her chin, returning her gaze to his. “Do I seem like the type of man who would say one thing to your face then lie behind your back?”
“No.”
“Do I seem like the type of man who would protect you or hurt you?”
Again, she didn’t hesitate. “Protect me.”
He leaned in closer, inhaling her flowery perfume. “What is most important to me, Emma?”
“Family. Being good and strong.”
“What is most important to Jake?”
“Himself.”
Shep kept one hand on her face, the other sliding across the small of her back, bringing her in, nice and close. He got right to the point of where her insecurities lay. Yes, he was cleaning up another man’s mess. She was worth it. “I am not Jake, Emma. Tell me.”
“You are not Jake.” More tears leaked from her eyes. Her lips parted, then shut.
He shook his head. “No, Emma, this won’t work unless you talk to me.”
“I want to hate him,” she practically growled.
“But you can’t?” He could hate him for her.
She inhaled sharply then rushed to say, “Logically, of course, I’m so angry at him. But mostly, I’m so sad and confused. Because it’s not even like I miss him, as much as it is I . . .”
“Miss your life?” Shep offered.
She nodded, a tear streaming down her cheek. “I had everything I ever wanted one day. The next, it was all gone. My dreams vanished into nothing. The friends I thought I had were nothing more than ghosts. I’m beginning to think that since the day I left New York City, I’ve been running from how much that all hurt me.” She hesitated, her voice blistering. “But the thing that gets me most is I don’t know how Jake could do that to me. We were together a year. I thought I meant more to him. I thought I was special to him.”
Shep gritted his teeth. If Jake where there right now, Shep would make him hurt. “You didn’t deserve any of this,” he stated. “But you need to stop running, darlin’.” He cleared the tears from her face, like he’d clear every single tear after it. “To stop running, you need to see that one day he’ll regret losing you. Maybe not now. But believe me, one day, he’s going to think of you and regret that you’re not there with him.”
She wiped her tears away, shaking her head. “You know, for me, it’s not losing him that makes me so sad. What gets me is that I thought what we had was real. I just don’t know how I couldn’t see the lies. It’s making me second-guess everything . . . and myself.”
Shep held her face tight in his hands, wishing he could take this burden from her. “What you had was real, Emma. For you, it was real and honest, and that’s what is so damn special about the way you care for someone. Whatever Jake did has to do with Jake. His issues. His problem. Don’t let him taint the love you gave him.”
She hesitated, then her chin quivered. “I don’t know how to move on.”
“You don’t need to move on.” He pressed his hand to her heart. “You keep him here. You remember the good times, but you can’t forget the bad either. He doesn’t deserve you, Emma, and that’s the bottom line here.”
She glanced down, and when she looked at him again, it felt like he was seeing a new side of her. “I don’t want to feel like this anymore.” Her voice was soft, gentle. “I was never this woman . . . untrusting and doubting. I want to be the woman I was before Jake, without the worry that you’re going to hurt me.”
And there it was. His way inside her heart.
He rose, bringing the heat of his body against hers, threading his fingers into her hair. “I am not Jake, Emma. Tell me.”
“You’re not Jake,” she whispered. “You’re not Jake,” she repeated, stronger this time.
Silence fell between them, and he allowed it, giving her time to process. He would never say more than he just had about this past boyfriend of hers. Nor would he ever defend his position, because as much as she deserved better, so did he. Once, he’d been with a woman who couldn’t see him or be happy with the guy he was. Emma wasn’t the only one who hated repeating mistakes.
The tears in her eyes began to slowly dry, the pain on her face shifting to something still new and undiscovered between them. She took one step closer, pressing her soft breasts against his chest, her hands slowly coming up to his face. “You’re Shep,” she said, and it was all she needed to say. It was all that mattered.
For the first time, Emma wasn’t looking at him with her guard up.
* * *
Emotion, heat, and everything in between blazed through Emma as Shep gathered her in his arms then carried her upstairs to the bedroom. When he laid her out in the middle of the mattress, his lips didn’t return to hers, filling her with heat the way he normally did. Instead, he studied her intently, stripping apart the layers of her soul until he found exactly what he was looking for. His examination felt nearly as erotic as his addicting touch when he pushed up her shirt until he had it over her head. He reached underneath her back, unclipping her bra, slowly dragging it down off her shoulders. With his potent gaze on her face, he unbuttoned her shorts, then pulled those and her panties slowly down, until he bared her to him.
Her tummy clenched in intoxicating desire when he reached for his shirt, taking it off over his head with one hand. God, she couldn’t get enough of the way his muscles flexed as he unbuckled his belt then opened the button of his jeans. The side of his mouth curved up, telling her she was being blatantly obvious about how much he turned her on. He sent his jeans along with his boxer briefs to the ground, and his erect cock sprang free. Her pussy tightened and warmed, desperate to have him fill her. She lifted her gaze to his when he slid between her thighs, bringing the warmth of his body across hers, until he was sliding his hands down her arms. He reached for both wrists then placed them behind her back, holding both right under her bottom, trapping her beneath him, and yet at the same time, lifting her pelvis up and bringing her heat close to him.
With his other hand on her hip, he shifted his weight onto his shoulder, and he rubbed his cock against her soaking slit. So hard. So big. She arched her hips higher, begging him to take her. He became more than something she needed, he had become an addiction, a high she kept wanting to chase.
A low groan rumbled from his throat. She knew why. She soaked his hardened length with desire only he could fulfill. With every shift of his hips, she mirrored his move, pooling heat low in her body. His mouth met hers then. What he gave her was so much more than anything he’d shown her yet. Shep was passion, and this wasn’t erotic playtime, this was emotion. With each slide of his lips against hers, and every swipe of his tongue, she understood him without him having to use words.
He wanted to keep her, protect her, cherish her.
All that emotion spilled over her, leaving her breathless. She moaned when he broke the kiss, and she gasped again when he began devouring her neck, nibbling at her flesh like he’d been starved of her. His cock was a constant tease, rubbing on her clit now, so hard, so perfect, she wanted him deep inside her. She ground up against him, and he grunted, a sound of raw, masculine need.
“I want to feel all of you.” His voice brushed against her ear. “Are you on the pill?”
“Yes.”
He lifted his hips then, his cock rubbing against her slit. His eyes positively glowed with desire. “I’m tested yearly. I’ve never had an STI.”
“Me neither,” she barely managed.
His enlarged pupils darkened his eyes when he pushed just the tip of his cock through her folds. “Yes?” he asked.
She wanted to grab his ass and push him inside. “Yes.” She struggled against his hold on her wrists. He pushed against her hip, keeping her pinned to the mattress, then he was inside her.
And it was heaven.
Skin against skin, he rocked into her, bringing pleasure with every spectacular inch of his cock. His mouth never sealed across hers. Oh, no, he watched he
r, his lips parted, a slow groan spilling from his mouth, brushing against her lips.
She saw this sweet side of Shep that came out every so often, one full of warmth and vulnerability and powerful emotion. Tears suddenly welled in her eyes again, but her tears meant everything. No longer could she run from what lay between them.
This was where love began.
With that realization—the intensity, the kindness, everything that Shep gave to her—her pleasure climbed higher. She kept her eyes on him, so connected by this powerful thing between them that she couldn’t push aside anymore.
She slid her legs up over his toned ass, pressing her ankles against him, wanting him to go deeper. He groaned, dropping his head into her neck, and she heard his rough breaths by her ear, and the masculine guttural moans. His shaft hardened further inside her, and she became so very wet when he began thrusting faster. Trapped beneath him, his body blanketing her, she met him thrust for thrust until he growled and looked at her again.
Possessiveness stormed across his gaze. She was his. And he was hers.
In that look she melted, wanting those very same things. Something changed in his expression then, becoming more focused. His eyebrows drew together, jaw set firmly, fingers dug into her hip, and he set a rhythm she couldn’t refuse. His pelvis slapped against her clit, forcing her pleasure higher and higher, until the only way down was over the edge.
Her chin lifted, and she struggled against wanting to touch him, and yet, somehow the fact that she couldn’t only took her to a deeper euphoria. She arched her back, toes pointing with the strain of her climax. He had to be feeling every contraction of her inner muscles squeezing at him, and she sure as hell experienced every glide of his hard shaft inside her, constantly teasing the perfect spot. The press of his pelvis on her bundle of nerves every time he went deeper only seemed to sharpen her breaths. Her eyes grew watery, the pleasure all but blinding now.
He slid a hand under her bottom, arching her up into him. Her eyes widened as the pleasure crashed into her.
“Yes!” she screamed.
“Fuck,” he groaned.
Then he was looking at her again, and her climax hung suspended in that second where she was trapped by every part of him. She was unafraid. If anything, she felt set free, as he rocked into her. It all became so much, too much, too intense. Her eyes shut, regardless that she wanted to keep watching him.
With a final thrust forward, he shoved his cock inside her right to the hilt, grinding against her clit. The thickness of him was perfection, sending her crashing over the edge of pleasure, drowning in the euphoria.
Many minutes later, after she found the strength to reopen her eyes, she blinked twice, then discovered him straining above her. Almost as if he planned not to miss a moment of her release, he’d stayed perfectly still while she broke apart around him. As controlled as he’d been all along, he withdrew his cock, slid his shaft twice against her sex, then he jerked, shutting his eyes, grunting his pleasure, the warmth of his seed spilling out between them.
Hot and intense, slow and sensual . . . my God, Shep was everything.
* * *
Many quiet minutes went by while Shep had Emma right where he wanted her. She was tucked into his arms, as close as she could get. His face was buried into her neck, and he rested his eyes in those sweet, silent moments after sex. He tried to shut his mind off, but his thoughts kept taking him to one place. He’d questioned a lot in his life, but not her. He’d known from that first time he saw Emma that there was something uniquely special about her.
Taking it down to very simple terms, he wanted her there in his arms whenever he went to sleep. He also wanted to see that beautiful smile of hers when he woke up in the morning. He’d never been the type of man to believe in love at first sight. Truth be told, he thought that was a yearning told by people searching for magic in their lives. For the first time, he realized he could very well be wrong in that regard. Because with Emma there was unexplainable magic.
“Shep.”
“Mmm.” He groaned into her neck, not wanting to interrupt this moment.
“Shep.”
Her soft whisper brushed across him again. He pulled her in closer, hoping that got her to quiet down. He didn’t want to talk. They’d done enough of that already, and most times, it was in the silence where so much was said. Besides, he needed this with her. There was no noise, no financial trouble, no responsibility. Just her, and him, and this growing thing between them, making him want to stay close to her.
The warmth of her body faded a moment when she flipped over, her breath brushing against his mouth. “Shep, are you sleeping?”
“Yes.”
Her silent laughter shook her body before she poked his arm. “Nash texted you.”
“So?” He kept his eyes shut.
“So, shouldn’t you answer it?”
Her mouth was so closed to his, he considered diving in for a kiss, ending this conversation altogether, but that would involve effort on his part. At the moment, he lacked energy. Instead, he replied, “No.”
She paused, then hurriedly said, “He’s inviting us to a bonfire.”
That opened Shep’s eyes, finding her almost nose-to-nose with him, and he chuckled. “We’ve already reached the stage where you’re reading my texts?”
The soft light from the hallway showed her nibbling her lip. “Well, it’s not like I meant to read it, but your text shows on your screen, and you see, the screen is glowing in this room right now so it was impossible not to see, and I grabbed the phone, and saw the message, and I—”
“Emma.” He lifted his head from the pillow, giving her a hard look. “I’m joking. We shouldn’t be together if I feel the need to hide my texts. What did Nash say?”
She gave a cute smile, showing her relief. “Here.” She offered him the phone.
He shook his head, placing his head back onto the pillow. “Read it to me.”
“Okay.” She bounced the mattress when she lifted the phone to her face. The bright white light lit up her face, displaying her excited eyes. “Okay, so he says, ‘Bonfire. You coming?’” She laughed, glancing at Shep. “Not really a guy of many words, huh?”
“Nope.” Shep studied Emma for a moment, a bit conflicted. He wanted to keep her all for himself tonight. They’d taken the turn he’d hoped they take. She finally had her guard down, and he wanted to enjoy this for as long as he could. But . . . “I take it you want to go?”
She gave a cute shrug. “It does sound like fun.”
He propped his elbow on the pillow, examining her a little harder now. She clearly wasn’t thinking this through entirely, but he was. He would not have a repeat of what happened last night at the bar. “Are you sure that you want to do this?” he asked.
“Do I want to go to a bonfire?” At Shep’s nod, she frowned. “Why wouldn’t I?”
He tucked her hair behind her ear, responding gently, “Last night, you were upset that people would perceive us in a relationship.” He hesitated as she glanced away, looking down at the duvet, though he quickly reached for her chin, drawing her attention back to him. “I’m not saying this to throw that in your face, or try to make you feel bad about it or anything like that, but we need honesty here, Emma, because of what you’ve been through.”
Her eyes softened, as did her voice. “Okay, but I’m not sure why going to a bonfire has anything to do with last night?”
He reached for her hand, twining his fingers with hers. “What worries me is that you’ll back away in the same way you did last night, because you’re being rushed into something you’re not ready for.” Laying it all on the line was the only option now. “I’m all for small steps. We don’t need to label or rush anything.”
“So, then what’s the problem?”
“Nash and Chase are my brothers,” he explained. “They are going to treat you like my girlfriend, likely call you that if anyone asks, because in their eyes you’re untouchable, even if you think otherwise.”
Her eyes widened, and her mouth dropped open. “Ew. I wouldn’t date either of them.”
“Well, good.” He tapped her mouth shut. “But what I meant was, with other men. We’re a protective family. They will treat you like you are mine, and to be honest, I would want them to.”
She began to frown. “What does that mean, exactly?”
“It means that if any other man got close when I was not with you, they would step in to ensure he backed away.”
She rolled her eyes. “That’s silly. I can handle myself.”
Shep made his move, sliding on top of her, settling between her thighs, earning a sexy gasp of surprise. “I do not doubt you could handle yourself.” He hovered over her, nose-to-nose. “Regardless, we are possessive sons of bitches. What’s ours is ours, and no one comes between our family.” Which, of course, only reminded him of his father’s desire to sell the land, and why Nash was so furious. Hell, why he was so furious too. “All I’m saying is that before we go tonight, you need to be sure that you’re okay with what I’ve said. They will look at you like we’re together. If one of Nash’s friends is there, he will introduce you as my girl. That’s just how it will be.” He paused, then lowered his voice. “I can handle that look of fear you gave me last night once, not twice.”
She hesitated, eyes searching his, then she gave a sweet smile. “I’m okay with being . . . your girl.”
His mouth dropped to hers before she could say anything more. He cupped her nape with one hand, lowering the other to slide under her bottom while her legs hugged his thighs.
Dirty-Talking Cowboy Page 18
