Meredith’s hand came to his thigh, and the weight and the warmth and the woman behind the touch offered comfort. Security. Understanding. “Oh, Liam,” she said, her voice soft. Soothing. “I guess I’m not sure what to say, other than how sorry I am for you and your sister.”
“Thank you. The ravine was steep,” he continued, unsure why he felt the need to say more. But he did, so he did. “Even so, they probably would’ve survived if they’d worn their seat belts. Can’t figure that one out, because they always did when we were all in the car together. As it was, Mom died pretty much instantly. Dad followed a few days later.”
He waited for another “I’m sorry” and all the typical platitudes that people gave in moments such as these. Oh, he didn’t doubt that Meredith would mean every last one, but they always came across—to Liam—as somewhat shallow. What a person said when they didn’t know what else to say, how to react, how to really be there for someone else.
He supposed that was why they called them platitudes, and that was fine. No one had to be there for him. He had all he needed. All he ever would need.
A minute or two of silence passed. Then, “Did you still eat the cake?” she asked in a somber tone, surprising him clear through.
Why? He should’ve known better than to expect the typical from Goldi. Nothing about her fell into the ordinary range. “I think I would’ve smashed it on the floor, tossed it out the back door, threw it against a wall. I don’t know. Something.”
Those words, the vehemence behind them, struck deeply. She was right on the money. They had destroyed the cake, two days later, but in the sink. Water from the faucet running at full blast and two angry, distraught children wielding wooden spoons. They’d kept at it—Fiona crying and Liam stone silent—until the cake had become mush and most of it had gone down the drain. “Curious, Goldi. Why that question? Why do you think you’d behave in that way?”
She squeezed his thigh lightly. “Because the cake was made to be a happy surprise, a gift and a celebration to have with your parents. I would think that learning what had happened, that they were never coming home, would never see what you and sister had done for them out of love, would’ve made that cake...I don’t know, an enemy, I guess? I would need to demolish the cake.” She shook her head, sighed. “Not sure if that makes sense.”
“More than you know.” She’d nailed it. And why was he surprised? “And that is what we did, and for about an hour afterward, we felt a hell of a lot better.”
Until, of course, they realized that cake or no cake didn’t change their reality or their sadness or their loss. Their parents were gone. They couldn’t escape that.
“Thank you for sharing,” she said. “I know that wasn’t easy for you.” Were those tears he heard in her voice? Maybe. Probably. She was that way. “But I am honored you did.”
“It was a long time ago.” Emotion lodged in his throat. He pushed it down deep, just as he always did. “I wouldn’t have shared if I didn’t want to. So there’s that.”
“Right. There’s that.” A small laugh. “I can still be grateful and honored.”
“I suppose you can.”
A silent calm enveloped the interior of the truck, and Liam no longer felt the need for either of them to talk. The quiet soothed, connected. It was the same sensation that his solitary lifestyle in the mountains offered. He didn’t question or analyze why—his stance on that and Meredith hadn’t altered—but he allowed himself to accept the peace. Allowed himself to accept that, for whatever reason, this woman soothed the beast inside.
“Oh!” she said, breaking his concentration. “I have a signal! Let me call Rachel.”
So she did, and he continued to drive. The squeal from the other side of the phone was easily heard from his position, as was Meredith’s explanation of what had transpired after her plane had landed: getting lost, her accident, her unusual rescue and that she was on her way to Rachel’s and should be there soon, but no, she didn’t know exactly how long it would take.
To that, he said, “Within twenty to thirty minutes, I’m guessing. Roads are getting better the closer we get to town, and we’re...almost there.” Almost. There.
Why hadn’t he waited another day?
“Thank you, Liam,” Meredith said before repeating the information to her friend. The two talked for another five minutes or so before she disconnected the call. “People were looking for me. I guess Cole’s brother, Reid, is a ski patroller, so he apparently knows the mountains even better than you! He and his friends have been on the search since yesterday.”
“I’m not surprised. I’m just glad they didn’t have anything to find, because that would’ve meant you weren’t safe.” Again, a kick of nausea hit his stomach. “You should know I despise that thought. Be more careful in the future, Meredith, okay? Stay safe.”
“Oh, trust me, I don’t plan on anything like that ever happening again.”
“Of course, you don’t. But come on, Goldi, you didn’t plan on that, either,” he said. “Which is what I’m talking about. If you’re going into a new area, do your research. Know where you’ll be, figure out more than one path to get you there and make damn sure you have a backup plan. I—that is, my dogs—won’t be around. Gotta count on yourself.”
“Why, Liam,” she said. “You sound concerned. That’s sweet.”
Concerned? More like out of his mind with gut-wrenching worry that she’d get herself in another predicament and he wouldn’t be there, couldn’t be there, to help. “Just some solid, practical advice that you should take to heart. Danger doesn’t typically announce itself.”
“I realize that. And yes, of course, I will take more care in the future.”
“Good.” Then, trying to lighten the moment, he said, “Don’t make me hire a team of bodyguards to follow you around. Take care of yourself, that’s all I ask.”
“And I already agreed.”
Maggie took that moment to wedge her head over the back of the seat and laid it on Meredith’s shoulder. Max followed suit with her other shoulder, and in that strange canine unison the two had, they whined. Loudly. Voicing their unhappiness, their own concern, at the possibility of Meredith being in danger again? Wouldn’t surprise him. More likely though, the dogs had somehow sensed they were about to lose their new friend.
Snuggling into the dog-head embrace, Meredith said, “It’s okay, guys. I’ll be fine! Maybe instead of bodyguards, you two can just follow me around. I would...like that.”
“They would, too,” Liam admitted just as they officially entered Steamboat Springs. “Read me your friend’s address again? From what I remember, her house isn’t too far.”
Meredith did, and yeah, another few minutes of her company was all he had left.
“Thank you, Liam.”
“For?”
“Everything. Just...everything.” She breathed in quickly, sharply. “This is odd, isn’t it? I feel as if I’ve known you for far longer than a few days, and we’re about to say...goodbye?”
“You’re welcome, and yeah, I know what you mean.” He didn’t miss that she’d ended that sentence as a question, rather than a statement, and that meant she was curious if they’d see each other again.
Logical, with how they’d spent last night. He had to give her something. Not just an answer, but some type of understanding of what she’d come to mean to him, because it was the truth. And she deserved that. They deserved that. But words were not his strong suit, and he still hadn’t figured out how to say all that should be said.
“I’ll be around. And Meredith? Thank you, too. I’ve...enjoyed these days with you. Please don’t doubt that.”
“Okay. I...I won’t. Thank you.”
Not enough. Not nearly enough. But it was all he had. Probably was all he’d ever have.
Whether it be the mood or something undefined,
Max and Maggie began whining again in long, serious notes of dismay. Hell. Knowing Liam’s luck, they’d do the same all the way home in their distress over losing Meredith, likely increasing in volume with each mile driven.
And, hell, again. With how fiercely his heart ached now while the woman remained sitting next to him, he might just join them. Because yeah, this might be the right—the only—action to take, he despised the idea as much as his dogs seemed to. Unlike his shepherds, though, he knew what was best.
And this, regardless of how much the loss burned in his gut, was best.
* * *
Sitting up in bed, Meredith stretched her arms and yawned. Looked around the guest room she was staying in at Rachel’s and yawned again. It would be a long day. Longer than yesterday, which had been longer than the day before.
Her third day with Rachel. Her third mostly sleepless night in a row. All due to Liam. She couldn’t stop thinking about him. Wondering what he was doing. If he was missing her with the same strength she missed him.
Obviously not. He knew where to find her and he hadn’t come looking.
When they’d arrived here together, he’d given her this long, searching look, a quick hug and then without a backward glance, had driven off. Literally into the sunset.
Fortunately, she hadn’t had the time to think too hard on that until later that night, when she’d finally fallen into this bed. First, there had been hugs from Rachel and her husband, Cole. Next, she’d had the difficult phone calls to make to her family, which had been emotional and supportive.
Her father had wanted to fly out there immediately, when he’d learned she was missing in a snowstorm, but Rachel had convinced him to wait until the storm cleared. Until they had more information.
Surprising that he’d capitulated, but he had. She didn’t think he’d have waited a lot longer, though. For a man who was used to getting what he wanted when he wanted, Arthur Jensen had shown incredible restraint. But he’d been scared. She heard it in his voice.
And when he apologized for cutting her communication from the family, she almost cried. Probaby would’ve if Rachel and Cole hadn’t been nearby.
Not even once had he mentioned that she wouldn’t have been in that predicament to begin with if she hadn’t made the decision she had, to go out on her own. He even said he was proud of her, for sticking to her guns. They had a lot more to talk about, but she felt sure they would repair their relationship and that he finally understood her need to find independence. She hoped so anyway.
The remainder of the day had been spent with Rachel, drinking wine and catching up, learning about all the gaps in each other’s lives. They’d stayed up so late, had giggled so hard, that Cole—who had tried to turn in hours earlier—finally gave up the fight and joined them.
A pleasant night. Except, of course, for missing Liam.
Yesterday had been much the same: more talking, more laughing and a quick tour around Steamboat Springs. They’d eaten lunch at Cole’s family’s restaurant, Foster’s Pub and Grill, and she’d had the opportunity to meet both of his brothers, Reid and Dylan, and his sister, Haley.
What hadn’t happened, what she thought was on the agenda for today, was the reason she came here in the first place: to think about her future, determine what that might look like, with Rachel as a sounding board. A difficult proposition from the beginning, but meeting Liam had made that even more difficult. A future. Her future. With or without Liam?
Standing, Meredith made the bed and grabbed a change of clothes, went to the log cabin’s bathroom and took a shower. Mostly cold, to wake up her tired brain.
Even with missing Liam, she couldn’t deny the pleasure of being here with Rachel, especially after so long. And oh, she seemed happy, living in this house with her handsome husband. Such a different life her friend had chosen from that in which she’d been raised.
While the log cabin was gorgeous, it wasn’t a large home by any stretch of the imagination. Two bedrooms. One bathroom. Dollhouse-sized when compared to what Rachel had grown up with, to what Meredith had grown up with. But yes, she could see being happy in a place like this, with a love like her friend had so fortunately found. Deliriously so, even. Except in her head, it was Liam’s face and his mountain cabin that she saw.
Damn that man anyway.
“‘I’ll be around,’” she mimicked as she towel-dried her legs. “‘I’ve enjoyed these days with you. Please don’t doubt that.’”
With any other man, she would have instantly taken those words as a brush-off. Would’ve instantly felt taken advantage of, even though she’d walked into their lovemaking knowing how it could, probably would, end.
But with Liam?
She didn’t believe he’d just coldly brush her off, as if she wasn’t anything more than a one-night stand. No, what she believed was that he was confused and didn’t know how to handle the situation. That he had done the best he could. But that she meant something to him, something important, and that maybe he just hadn’t reconciled himself with that yet.
The possibility also existed that she had finally reached the delusional stage and her brain refused to accept the truth. Or her heart. Or both.
She’d give him time. She’d wait it out for a little while before deciding on the delusional, blind and naive lovesick choice.
Dressing in a pair of jeans and a long, butter-yellow sweater, Meredith brushed her damp hair and rolled it into a clip on top of her head. The scent of coffee and cinnamon wafted through the closed door as she finished her morning routine. Rachel and Cole must be awake.
She found them both in the kitchen, sitting at the table over their coffee, chatting easily.
They were quite the attractive pair. Rachel with her long, straight blond hair and wide blue eyes and Cole with his black hair and dark brown eyes. And whenever they looked at each other, you’d have to be in a coma not to see the love they had each for other.
Beautiful. Something to aim for someday.
“Morning,” she said with a smile. “That coffee smells amazing.”
“Thank Cole,” Rachel said. “I was out early this morning. But those cinnamon rolls you smell? All me, I’ll have you know. And they’re just about warmed up, so hope you’re hungry.”
“Morning to you, Meredith.” Cole stood and poured her a cup of coffee, which he brought back to the table. “Don’t believe a word my wife says. Those rolls came from a coffeehouse called the Beanery and were baked by the owner, our friend, Lola. You’ll love them. I guarantee you’ve never tasted any as good.”
“Hrmph. I said they were almost done warming, not that I baked them with my own two hands, and I bought them, didn’t I?” Rachel wrinkled her nose in Cole’s direction. “But he is right. They’re delicious and I thought they’d be the perfect start to our day.”
“You guys are already like an old married couple. It’s cute.” And even this friendly, warmhearted bickering brought about a yearning. Geez. She was a mess. “And I am hungry, so can’t wait to try Lola’s famous cinnamon rolls.”
She did a few minutes later, over light conversation about the weather—which was, thankfully, back to normal for this time of year—and an upcoming baby shower for their sister-in-law, Chelsea, who was married to Cole’s brother, Dylan. Mostly, Meredith just listened, enjoying the camaraderie between husband and wife. How effortless they were together, from their speech to their body language to those intimate smiles they so often exchanged.
Yes, Rachel had found her nirvana. And from their conversations the past few days, Meredith knew it hadn’t come easily. She and Cole had to work for this, and okay, some of their choices fell into the questionable range, but they had done the best they could and their path brought them to this table, in this house, sharing coffee and cinnamon rolls and intimate smiles.
Could make a person believe that anything
was possible.
“Okay, ladies, I’m due at work,” Cole said, standing. In addition to the restaurant, his family also owned a sporting goods store, which he managed. He smiled at Meredith before kissing his wife. Then, “I should be home around seven, I think. I’ll bring dinner.”
Rachel’s eyes followed him until he vanished down the hallway. When the sound of the front door closing reached their ears, she jumped from the table and grabbed a notebook and pen from the counter. Back in her seat, she flipped open to the first page and pushed it with the pen across the surface of the table to Meredith, saying, “Here. Let’s see what we can figure out.”
Picking up the pen, Meredith twisted it between her fingers. “Yes. It’s time. The practical should come first. What type of job I want and then the job itself. A place to live.”
“Well, maybe we should begin with location? Seems that should come first, right?” Tapping her pink-painted nails against the table, Rachel said, “Do you want a completely fresh start, or are you thinking of staying in San Francisco since you still have your apartment?”
“The lease expires in two months.” Good question. “So that isn’t a huge issue. I have enough in savings to deal with that and probably a couple of months of expenses.” She should give that money back to her father, really. She only had it due to his interference and help with her salary, but...that suddenly seemed of such little consequence.
Her goal was a whole new life. If she needed some help from her old life to make that happen, why not take it? And without her savings, she had...zero money. So, okay.
“Want to stay on the West Coast? Or try something different?”
“I am going to stay here, in Steamboat Springs.” Meredith said the words before she’d even thought them through, but once she had, she knew that was the only choice she could make.
A Bride for the Mountain Man Page 14
