She sighed softly and closed her eyes. Instantly she was transported back to those few moments in Stone’s arms. Her body began to tingle as she remembered being so close to him. She could recall the scent of him, his heat, the way his hands had felt against her back and waist. His had been the most amazing kiss of her life.
Cathy opened her eyes. “Not that I have a whole lot to compare it to,” she reminded herself.
There had been a couple of kisses in high school at different parties when kissing games had been played. But she’d never had a boyfriend. She’d been shy and standoffish, mostly because of her mother. It had been too dangerous to let anyone get close. She couldn’t have risked someone wanting to come home with her ever. So she’d refused the few tentative offers she’d had.
Her only other kissing experience had come at an acquaintance’s summer party a couple of years after high school. Cathy didn’t remember very much about the night, except it had been very hot and the college boys had spiked the drinks. She did recall one young man cornering her by the billiard table. He’d pushed her into the shadows, murmured something about her being quiet but sexy. Then he’d stuck his tongue in her mouth and his hand down her shorts. She’d been too stunned to react. He’d taken her silence as agreement and had started pushing her toward one of the bedrooms. Cathy had escaped by asking him to get her a drink, then ducking out a side door and walking home. At the time, she’d decided that the kissing they talked about in books was highly overrated and she wasn’t ever going to worry if she didn’t do it again.
But now everything had changed. Stone’s kiss hadn’t been anything like the ones she’d experienced before. She’d liked it and she wanted him to do it again. Not that he would, she thought as she put her makeup away and headed toward the door. She was going to be working for him, and that meant they would have a professional relationship. She just wished there was a way she could have it all.
Ula was in the kitchen when Cathy arrived. She quashed a flash of disappointment that Stone wasn’t there. He rarely joined them in the morning, but sometimes he did and after what had happened yesterday, she’d been hoping this would be one of those special days.
“Good morning,” the housekeeper said as she put a plate of cut-up fruit in front of Cathy. “How did you sleep?”
“Great. And you?”
“Well as always.”
Cathy speared a strawberry. “Did Stone tell you?”
Ula poured them each a cup of coffee, then took her usual seat on the opposite side of the small table. The kitchen itself was large, with restaurant-sized appliances. The floors and countertops gleamed in the bright morning sun. The windows faced east and caught all the early light. Fresh herbs grew in a built-in planter, while several vibrant, healthy plants hung from hooks in the ceiling.
Ula’s dark eyes brightened with curiosity. “Mr. Ward hasn’t told me anything.”
Cathy leaned forward. “I’m not leaving. Stone has offered me a job as his assistant. I start Monday. He said it would be better for him if I continued to live in the house.” Some of her good humor faded. “I hope you don’t mind the extra work.”
“Child, you worry too much.” Ula gave her a smile, then touched the back of her hand. “I’m delighted for you. I could never understand why someone as bright as yourself had gotten locked away in that boring job. Mr. Ward is a demanding boss, but he’s fair. Besides, I suspect you’ve already seen much of his temper is more bark than bite.”
Cathy relaxed into her chair. She hadn’t realized how concerned she’d been about the other woman’s opinion until she’d told her about the job offer. Ula wasn’t an open person and she didn’t let on either her feelings or what she was thinking. But over the past several weeks, Cathy had noticed a softening by the housekeeper. She was glad to know she had the other woman’s approval.
“I have a lot to do today,” Cathy said. She explained about renting out her house and getting a post-office box.
Ula nodded. “You might want to think about picking up a few things to wear, too. Everything you own is loose. Besides, I suspect Mr. Ward will want you to go into the office for him, from time to time. It’s some grand building on the west side. One of those high-rise places. They all dress nice over there.”
Cathy hadn’t thought that far ahead. “You’re right. I still have a few pounds to lose, but I could get a couple of things now and fill in as I go. There’s a nice mall at the intersection of the 101 and 405 freeways. I’ll stop there on my way back.” She smiled. “Thanks for the suggestion.”
“You’re a sweet girl. You’ll do well for Mr. Ward. See that you do well for yourself, too.”
“I plan to learn everything I can.” Cathy knew her happiness showed on her face. She couldn’t help beaming. For the first time in her life, everything was going right.
*
“I’ve read the prospectus,” Stone said into the phone. When Ula tapped on the door, he motioned for her to enter and put his breakfast tray on his desk. “Yes, I understand what everyone is saying about the IPO. I don’t agree. I think they’re going out too high with their initial public offering of stock and I’m not going to buy. The company has merit and they’re going to be successful, but wait a month. I’m betting that by then the initial price is cut nearly in half. Then we’ll buy.” He listened for a couple of minutes. “Fine. If Johnson disagrees, he can risk his own money, but not my clients’ funds. No, I don’t want to talk to him about it. Uh-huh.” There were a few more protests, then Stone realized Ula was still in the room. She obviously had something on her mind, which was unusual. She rarely interrupted his business day. “I’ll get back to you later,” he said, and hung up the phone.
He turned his attention to his housekeeper. “Have a seat, Ula. Tell me what’s on your mind.”
Ula sank into the chair opposite his. Despite her petite stature, she was a formidable presence. As always, her gray dress was perfectly pressed. Every dark hair was in place and her gaze was steady. Ula seemed unflappable. She would have been a great spy.
“You’re not going to like this,” she announced, and then waited, as if he would order her from the room.
“Unless you’re telling me that you’re quitting, I think I’m up for just about anything.”
She pressed her lips together. “I’m not quitting. I like my job. It’s about Cathy.”
For some reason, her words didn’t surprise him. He knew Ula had been an interested bystander in the odd relationship he’d developed with his houseguest. Cathy was neither close friend nor family member, yet Stone had welcomed her into his home. He hadn’t been willing to explain about their special relationship, nurtured by years of chatting on the phone. Nor did he want to discuss the psychology of his motives for helping her.
“What about Cathy?” he asked, playing for time. “You’ve offered her a job.” She spoke as if that simple sentence explained it all.
“I know. As my assistant. I need someone and she’s perfect. She’s bright, trustworthy and looking to make a change. This is a better opportunity for her than that dead-end job she had at the answering service.”
“I don’t dispute that this is a step up for her. What I question are your motives.”
“I’m trying to do the right thing.”
Her eyes darkened with disapproval. “You’re trying to make up for the past. This isn’t right, Mr. Ward. Cathy isn’t Evelyn, and all the fixing in the world isn’t going to bring your wife back from the dead.”
Ula had always been one for plain speaking and this time was no exception. Stone had to swallow hard to keep from showing surprise or lashing out in a defensive move. Instead, he forced himself to relax back into his chair and appear calm.
“You’re perceptive as always,” he conceded. “I’ll admit there are some similarities between Cathy’s situation and Evelyn’s life. But I know they are two different women. Nothing will bring Evelyn back.” Or atone for what he’d done, but he was still working on the latter. “Cath
y only needs a boost up in life. I can offer her that.”
Ula leaned forward. “Mr. Ward, you have to think about what you’re doing. Cathy is a very nice young woman. She is everything you’ve said. Bright, hardworking and someone you can trust. She’ll be very loyal. But she’s young and inexperienced. To her, you are a romantically tragic man. She will fall in love with you. Perhaps she already has. She will allow herself to dream, not knowing that you are incapable of loving her back. You will break her heart and then she’ll be forced to leave. It would be kinder to let her go now.”
Ula’s words stunned him. He didn’t want to think about Cathy loving him, or anyone caring about him again. He didn’t want love. He didn’t want to care about anyone. Being alone was so much safer.
“You’re exaggerating. We’re friends, nothing more.” Memories of the kiss intruded, but he pushed those away. It had been a one-time occurrence, never to be repeated.
“Just because you won’t acknowledge the truth doesn’t mean it’s going away,” Ula told him. “I’m not saying it’s wrong for her to love you. In many ways, you’re a good man. But the scars go deeper than your cheek. We both know that. You’ll never be able to give her what she deserves.”
The truth was as ugly as his face. How long had Ula been able to see through him?
“Cathy isn’t a toy,” Ula continued. “You can’t play with her until you’re tired of her, then toss her aside. I don’t think you’d do that on purpose, but it is a potential problem. You’ve seen Evelyn in her and you want to find a way to make up for what happened before.”
“I’m giving Cathy an opportunity. Without this, she goes back to her go-nowhere job at the answering service. Is that what you want?”
“And when she falls in love with you?”
“She won’t.” She couldn’t. He wasn’t worth loving, and Lord help him, he couldn’t risk caring back. He’d loved Evelyn and in the end, he’d been the cause of her death.
Ula clasped her hands tightly together. “You can’t keep her safe like a princess in a fairy tale. She’s not under a spell, and this isn’t an enchanted castle. She needs to know the truth. She deserves that much. At least let the girl make a choice.”
“She made a choice. She wants the job.”
Ula stared at him for a long time. He forced himself to stay still, when in fact he felt like pacing the room. His housekeeper’s words were hitting too close to home by far. Dammit all to hell, when had he become so transparent?
“Does she know the truth about Evelyn?”
“She knows about the accident, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“It’s not. Does she know you blame yourself for the accident?”
He thought about their conversations. “In a manner of speaking.”
“I see. Does she know how you felt about your late wife?”
“She knows that we were very close. The best of friends.”
Ula’s dark eyes saw far too much. Her expression tightened. “So you’re not going to tell her.”
“Tell her what? You’re making too much of this.”
“Am I?” Ula rose to her feet. “What will you do when she falls in love with you? You talk of wanting to make it better for her, but I don’t think she’s going to thank you for breaking her heart. Because that is what is going to happen. We both know that. Even if you wanted to, you’re not capable of loving her back.”
With that, she turned on her heel and left.
Stone stared after her, then focused his attention on the view behind him. But for once the expanse of sky and ocean held little comfort. Ula had been wrong about many things, he told himself. He knew this wasn’t a fairy story. There was no castle, although there was a beast in residence. Cathy was free to come and go as she liked. She’d made an informed choice about taking a job with him. He’d offered her the opportunity of a lifetime. Without him, she would have gone back to the answering service and her small, tedious life. He offered her the world.
As for her falling in love with him…it wasn’t possible. He wasn’t the kind of man to inspire strong feeling. He was too withdrawn, too physically unappealing.
What about the kiss?
The voice whispered from inside his head. He pushed it away, reminding himself that it had been a reaction of gratitude combined with the reality of two adults thrown together in close quarters. Nothing more.
That had to be true because Ula had been right about one important point. He would never risk loving anyone again. So he would never be able to return Cathy’s affections.
Not that it was going to be an issue. They would work together, they would stay friends. His housekeeper would see that she’d been wrong.
He turned back to his computer and began to work, all the while ignoring the burning in his gut that felt amazingly like guilt.
Chapter Ten
Cathy paused outside the door to Stone’s office. Despite all the time they’d spent together, she was nervous. Probably because today was different. She was no longer just a friend, or someone he was helping out while she recovered from the accident. Today she was his employee.
“I can do this,” she whispered. She’d repeated the phrase at least a hundred times over the past couple of days. So far she wasn’t convinced, but she figured it had to sink in sometime and start working. She would be successful because the alternative was unthinkable. This mattered too much—she wasn’t going to let herself fail.
She smoothed down the front of her tailored slacks. She’d bought a couple of pairs, along with some simple blouses and a pair of nice leather flats. The clothes were a far cry from her usual oversize jeans and T-shirts. The combination of low-fat food and Pepper’s exercise program showed on her slimmer figure. Between that and her new haircut, she felt almost pretty. Perhaps for the first time in her life.
“Good thing,” she said softly. “Today I’m going to need all the confidence I can get!”
With that she knocked firmly on Stone’s office door and stepped inside.
He was already working. He glanced up and smiled. Cathy’s stomach reacted with a predictable leap up against her ribs. She sighed. So much for getting used to being around him, she thought. Every time she thought she had the situation under control, something happened to change it. This time her nerves were a combination of first-day tension and lingering memories of the kiss they’d shared.
“Good morning,” he said, and glanced at his watch. “It’s barely eight, Cathy. I didn’t expect you this early.”
She shrugged and stepped into his office. “I wasn’t sure what time you wanted me to start and I knew you would be here first thing.” According to Ula, the man barely slept. He didn’t drink, didn’t eat much. Work was his life. Cathy had begun to wonder if the reason for that was work was all Stone could trust.
“Why don’t we compromise on eight-thirty as a regular starting time,” he said as he rose to his feet. “I would rather you stayed late than came in early. I have people on the East Coast to take care of the market opening, but not enough staff to cover the international comings and goings in the Far East. This way.”
He led her to a side door. She followed him into another room. “You’ll work here,” he said.
Cathy glanced around in amazement. She hadn’t really thought about what it would be like working for Stone. She’d known she would be busy, but she hadn’t dwelled on the question of if she would have a desk or not. She certainly hadn’t expected a whole office just for her.
The space was smaller than his, but there were large windows and the view was amazing. An L-shaped desk dominated the room. The short leg contained a computer complete with a printer. Against the far wall were several filing cabinets, along with copy and fax machines. Opposite the door to his office was another door.
“That leads to the conference room,” he said. “Should you need to hold a meeting here, it’s very convenient. Try to give Ula a day’s notice if you want a meal served, although she’s great about throwing someth
ing together at the last minute.”
Cathy was stunned. Her head felt as if it were spinning, and she was having trouble concentrating on what he was saying. If she wanted to hold a meeting? Oh, sure, she did it all the time. Tons of meetings, just her and her laptop back at the answering service.
Doubts flooded her. What on earth had she been thinking? She didn’t know anything about the world of investments or finance. She couldn’t fake her way through this. Stone was crazy if he thought she wasn’t going to completely mess up everything. She had to come clean and let him know that he’d made a mistake.
But she didn’t want to. Maybe it was wrong, but she really needed this chance. What if she could do it? What if she was smarter than she thought, or the work wasn’t that hard or any variations on that theme? What if this was exactly what it felt like—the opportunity of a lifetime? She didn’t dare walk away. She might never get another chance.
“We’re going to start you out slow,” Stone told her as he walked to the computer and patted the top of the monitor. “I thought this morning you could answer some correspondence for me. I write my own memos and E-mail.” He grinned. “This is the nineties, after all. But these are official letters, so I prefer to have them done. I’ve left you notes and some samples so you can see the format.”
He leaned forward and shuffled through the papers. Cathy watched him. The light-colored shirt he wore emphasized his dark good looks. She’d been around him so much, she barely noticed the scars on this face. As always he took her breath away.
Suddenly he straightened and stared at her. “I never thought to ask. Are you familiar with computers?”
She sent up a prayer of thanks for her lone indulgent purchase a little over a year ago. “Yes, I had a laptop. It was damaged in the fire. Eddie’s getting it repaired for me.” She moved to the desk and sat down. After feeling around on the front of the machine, she found the On switch and pressed it. The machine hummed to life.
The Millionaire Bachelor Page 12
