Katrina drew in a deep breath. She'd have to bring Robert up to speed. If he was no longer MIA, she could get this over with and go home.
She almost tiptoed up to his closed door. She tapped lightly, as if she hoped he wouldn't hear her, and she could claim she'd tried to contact him. Instead, she heard him call, "Come in."
Somehow, even working in the same general space, they'd only had minimal contact for almost two months. Today, his appearance shocked her. Robert did not look good. He'd removed his tie and unbuttoned his collar, his jet black hair appearing disheveled—a first. His eyes seemed dull. His arms stretched before him with his hands balled into fists on the desktop.
"Can I come in?" Katrina asked in a small voice. She hesitated to intrude, sensing something seriously wrong.
"Of course," he said, straightening, but with no life in his voice.
Then she saw something of the old Robert for a moment, a flash in his eyes, or maybe a twitch at the corner of his mouth, but whatever he'd mustered faded almost immediately.
Kate took a seat and waited to proceed. Her boss stared at her with a blank expression.
"Is something wrong, Robert?" she ventured.
After a short pause, he said, "It's my dad's birthday."
"Oh?" Katrina said, trying to sound chipper. "How are you going to celebrate?" she asked.
"I'm not," he said.
Her quizzical look prompted an explanation.
"Katrina, my father died six months ago."
A small gasp escaped her lips, and the auditor's mouth fell open. She had no idea. The way he spoke of his parents, it seemed certain they were both still alive and well.
"I'm sorry. I didn’t know," she stammered, then added, "the first two years are the roughest."
Robert's countenance shifted a smidgeon, still foreign but closer to what she was used to.
"You lost your father, too?" he asked.
"No, my dad's still alive. My mother passed the summer before I went away to college."
His face winced as if in sympathy for her loss. She reached across the table top and gently placed her hands over his, as if by instinct. Katrina moved her right thumb across the base of his, in slow, steady movements, trying to lend some kind of comfort to the man who obviously struggled with his grief.
"Care to share what you're thinking, Robert?" she asked after a moment. She had observed his jaw clench at her touch, but knew his hands had relaxed some. She also noticed that whenever she called him by name, his countenance softened a small degree.
"It's a long story, Katrina."
"I'm in no hurry," she said, keeping contact with his hands.
Those four words seemed to break his resolve, and he poured out his history on her like a waterfall.
"I never wanted to be part of Dad's business. That's why I joined the Marines. I thought that would settle it. But I'm an only child, and my parents had certain expectations. It didn’t take me long to realize I wasn’t cut out for the service. I couldn't deal with the cruelty, poverty and tragedy we witnessed everyday. So when my commitment was up, I came home. I was sort of lost, caught between two different worlds. That's when I met you, Katrina."
His voice dropped, and he paused and held her gaze for a moment. She kept quiet, giving him the time he needed. He scrutinized her face as if considering what he'd say next.
He continued, "I still wasn’t willing to kowtow to Dad. So, I stuck it out at Wood and Associates until the Capital audit finished. Then, I moved on to an investment bank. Dad couldn't figure out why I didn't just take my place at his company. I'd been a rebellious kid and caused my folks no end of grief. Eventually, I decided I should make things right with them, and out of guilt more than anything, I joined the family firm."
Robert shook his head back and forth, slowly.
"They were so happy, Katrina. I hated it though. Advertising can be a nasty business, and I'd seen so much real tragedy already. I couldn't stomach suits acting like two sugars instead of one in their morning coffee was a life or death situation. I stuck it out as long as I could, then told my dad I was having no more of it. I found a position where I was needed—in third world countries. I helped charities reorganize and cut expenses to make their donors' cash stretch further so they could reach more people. I wrote business plans for families trying to start up a goat herd or villages trying to raise funds to dig a well."
He chuckled. "And in the daytime, I built houses, hospitals, and schools."
Kate smiled. She never knew this side of her boss, and it warmed her to see him so passionate about such causes.
"The thing is, I'd never felt more alive, and Dad told me to go when I explained the opportunity. He was already sick but kept it from me. He and Mom both did. He died while I was half way around the world. Our relationship had just started to become what it should have been all those years before, when he lied to me and robbed me of the chance to help him through his illness. I didn’t even get the chance to say goodbye. I’m not sure I can forgive him for that."
Katrina sensed that he shared an intimate part of his life with her when he relayed his history. His pain was palpable and raw. She lost herself in his dark, brooding eyes for several minutes as she thought about what he'd shared.
"Do you know what I think?" she eventually asked.
"No, but I'll hear it." Her boss smiled, then added, "I thought you'd drifted off there for a moment."
"No, I stayed right with you."
She wasn't about to explain how she picked up on unsaid things sometimes. She sensed people's pain, motives, and even their circumstances and histories. He'd think her crazy.
"I think your father wanted you to have your heart's desire and finally figured out it wasn’t working in advertising. I think he didn't want you to see him suffer, nor did he want to burden you with his illness."
"But, I could have—"
Kate squeezed his fists as hard as she could, given their size compared to her small hands. He stopped mid-sentence.
"I know you could have handled it, and taken care of him, and run the company, all while comforting your Mom. I'm sure he knew that too, Robert, and I agree, he robbed you of the opportunity. But I think he loved you too much to watch you suffer along with him. Maybe he wasn't as strong as you are. Did you consider that?"
Robert shook his head. She wasn't sure if he disagreed with her or hadn't thought of his father as she suggested.
She watched the familiar clench in his jaw, but he released his fingers from balled fists and placed her hands in his. Katrina couldn't take her eyes off the man's hands, and Robert's touch distracted her too much to notice the struggle taking place within him reflected on his face. If she'd only glanced up.
"Why don't you tell me some things about your father? Things you admired about him."
"Uh, uhm." He cleared his throat, trying to regain his composure.
"He was a man of faith," he said matter-of-factly.
That grabbed her attention, and she caught Robert's eyes searching her face.
He held her gaze as she asked, "What kind of faith?"
"Oh, he had a great faith, and by that I mean strong, unshakable faith in God. It's what got him and Mom through my rebel years." He cracked a small grin.
"I see," she said.
She imagined his mother on her knees each night, pleading for her son to behave and stay on the straight and narrow path.
"What else?" she asked.
"He loved my mother with everything he had. He was savvy and smart in many different ways. Oh, and he was good with people."
Katrina smiled. Like father, like son, mostly.
What are you grinning about?" he demanded.
She debated whether she should tell him but decided against it.
"I've got an idea. Do you have plans this evening?" she asked.
"No."
She could see that he fought back a smile, and the idea that she could cheer him gave her great pleasure.
"If you promise
not to think me silly, I believe there's something we could do together that would be good for you. Meet me downstairs in ten minutes, all right?"
Robert nodded, tucking the corners of his mouth down to prevent the smile she already knew he hid.
Chapter 11
-A Missed Opportunity-
She waited in the lobby, her back to the elevators.
"What's all this?" Robert asked, surprise in his voice. "I couldn't tell it was you, at first, hidden behind all those balloons."
Katrina held a large bouquet of grass green helium balloons. He figured there were at least two dozen and gave up counting at twelve.
"Bring your car around, will you, Robert? This is how we’re going to celebrate your father," she said.
Once they managed to corral the balloons into the back of the Rover and shut the doors, she told her boss to head for the beach, Lot Seventeen, north of the pier. LaSalla had no idea what the girl had in mind, but he went along, glad he was no longer alone.
"Where did you come up with all those balloons?" he asked, once on the freeway, heading towards Santa Monica.
"I called the florist downstairs and had Jose pick them up for me."
"What are we going to do with them, Kate?"
"We're going to take them down to the beach, stand on the shore, and release one at a time in honor of your dad. It's something I did for my mother, and I think it will serve you well. You tell me one of his good qualities and release a balloon. That's how it works, until they are all gone." She averted her eyes, sure he would think the idea silly.
Robert didn't think releasing a mass of dirigibles would help anything, but he appreciated the girl's concern and the trouble she went to for his benefit.
"How did you know to choose green? It was Dad's favorite color," he said.
She couldn't control the smile spreading across her face. Somehow, she'd known that. She'd have to come up with some kind of excuse, fast, or he'd think her mad, or a charlatan, or worse.
"You wear that color quite often. So, I just assumed your father favored it too."
She watched as the hard, thin line of his lips broke into a grin.
"So, you take notice of my clothing, do you?" he said, turning and arching an eyebrow.
"Keep your eyes on the road, please," Kate responded.
He found the beach-side parking lot without any trouble and helped Katrina from the car. She kicked off her shoes as he removed his, tossing them and his socks into the Rover. Then he rolled up his pants and pulled the balloons from the vehicle.
Near the shore, the sand dropped away to a steep incline before meeting the ocean. Robert grabbed her hand, and with a vice grip, led her to the water's edge. Thankful she'd worn a pencil skirt, Katrina didn't have to worry about the wind billowing a dress from her body, and could use her hands to hold balloons instead.
"I chose this spot because the hill provides privacy," she said, nodding back to the ridge they'd just descended. She continued, pulling her hand free of his grip and taking the green bouquet from him, "Now, tell me your dad's good qualities again, one by one."
"He was a man of faith," he repeated.
She handed him a balloon and instructed in a soft tone, "Thank him for the example he set, or thank God for giving you a father who had great faith."
She could tell her boss felt self-conscious, so she added, "It doesn't have to be aloud."
He nodded, closed his eyes, then released the first balloon. She watched as he opened his lids and stared at the green orb until it disappeared, a tiny dot in the sky. He continued the process, sharing his father's traits with her while reminding himself of what a great dad he'd had. It took almost an hour to go through the bouquet. When he'd released the last one, she felt he'd come to better terms with his father's birthday.
LaSalla turned to Katrina, his eyes tender, and studied her features. He placed a hand at the nape of her neck and drew her to him, embracing her against his rock hard chest. All too quickly, he released Kate, then mussed the hair on the crown of her head in a playful manner.
"You're one smart girl, Katrina Crimshaw. I'd have never guessed this balloon thing of yours would work, but I feel a whole lot better."
"I'm glad, Robert. I didn't like seeing you that way earlier in the office."
Her boss grinned, grabbed her hand and hauled her up the hill, away from the Pacific. As they walked across the wide expanse of sand towards the parking lot, Robert laced his fingers through hers and stroked her thumb every so often.
"Hey, what did you come to see me for, anyway?" he asked, remembering there had to be a reason for her visit to his office.
"Oh, I forgot!" she exclaimed. She added, "I'm afraid it's not good news."
He drew up and faced his employee.
"What is it, Katrina?"
"Daud Industrial backed out of their deal with Morris Greir, Inc., because the SEC is set to launch an investigation into Greir Limited. They must have assumed that the two companies are related."
Relief spread across Robert's face as Kate wondered what her boss had expected. He scratched his head, tousling his thick locks. His messy mop, with tufts pointing in all directions, gave the man a boyish appearance.
"That should be easy to fix. We'll just explain that they're not connected," he stated.
"Mike Johnson is already on it. Apparently, there's a strict protocol to be followed in situations like these. Hopefully, we'll know something later this week," she said.
"All right," he said, resuming their walk to the lot.
He opened the Ranger's door for her and helped her into her seat. Then he clicked the seat belt into place across her lap. The action brought his face close to hers as he reached over her body, causing heat to rush through her. She held her breath and feigned indifference. Having him so close created all sorts of sensations inside her. Once he'd shut her door, oxygen rushed from her lungs, and she drew in several large gasps before he reached the driver's side and sat down.
"Where to?" he asked.
Kate concentrated on slowing her pulse and cooling the hot blush she felt rising to her cheeks.
"Katrina, where should I take you?"
She became aware of Robert's voice. What did he just say?
"Anywhere," she said before catching herself.
"What was that?" he asked.
"Huh? What were you saying?" she asked, flustered.
"Are you feeling all right, Kate? I wanted to know if I should drop you back at the office or take you home."
With you? Yes, take me home with you, Robert.
"Uh, just drive me home, if you don't mind," she said. Kate couldn't even remember where she'd left her car, or if she'd driven herself or taken the bus that morning.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked again.
"Yes, I'm good. Thank you," she replied, staring out the window and trying to steel herself.
He drove straight to her place without needing directions. Once he put the gear shift in park, LaSalla turned to Katrina.
"Thank you again for this afternoon. It really helped," he said, focusing his gaze on her blue eyes.
"You're welcome. Thank you for sharing about your father. He sounds like a wonderful man, Robert."
He stared at her a moment longer. She felt glued to her seat as he held her gaze. She saw his jaw clench just before his features softened and he leaned in towards her, dipping his head.
Something snapped in Katrina.
She sprang from the Rover and yelled, "Thanks for the ride!" before dashing into her apartment.
Inside, she leaned against her locked door, panting. Fear chased her from what she felt certain was a kiss. Robert was going to kiss her, full on the mouth. Would that have been so bad?
"No!" she shouted.
No, it wouldn't be a bad thing. Images of her and Rod kissing flashed across her mind. Her ex-fiancée was a boy compared to Robert. She shook her head, trying to erase her memories of Rod Baxter and the pain he'd caused. And didn't her bos
s have a girlfriend? In fact, he had a tall, leggy, gorgeous girlfriend. What business did he have trying to kiss me, when he's already dating someone else? Someone who keeps him from coming to work early each morning.
A plethora of negative emotions flooded Katrina. Anger, bitterness, jealousy, and regret combined and produced a tremble throughout her body. She eased herself onto the sofa and tried to calm down. After some time, she drifted off to sleep, dreaming of Robert and the passionate kiss they almost shared.
Chapter 12
-Tests-
In an examining room at Cedars-Sinai Hospital, the doctor explained the tests required for Kate. Barry held her hand, and after yesterday, his composed presence reassured her. She'd said a silent prayer to God, asking for good results, and now felt calm.
A slough of exams, designed to test her inner ear and brain, made her nauseous. Each proved worse than the one before. After that ordeal, she underwent a CAT scan, the last procedure of the day.
"I should have lied when I filled out the online questionnaire," Katrina whispered as Barry drove her home. She continued, "Those tests were worse than my symptoms. I don't know why they insisted on those. Dizziness is not my problem!"
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