“But what about the boys who took you? And this Dwight Henderson? And the Iron Wraiths?”
“I don’t know about the boys yet, but Junior Henderson will be going to juvenile detention and once Dwight recovers, it’s jail time for him as well. I’m of no concern to the Wraiths. In fact, I’m not certain why they were there, and I probably shouldn’t have mentioned that part of the story.”
Between rounds of lovemaking the previous night, Nathan shared his history with Curtis and Dwight’s plan to kidnap me. He also explained how he thought the Wraiths had something to do with my kidnapping, thinking it was a ploy to get him to patch in again. He accused Catfish of such, but quickly learned everything was on Dwight. I can’t say I understand what he’d want with me all these years later. Nathan thinks it was the unrequited crush from when Dwight was a teen. I think that’s preposterous but then Nathan reminded me, he’s been waiting on me all this time, too.
I just needed to give it my due time before I found you again.
“But you’re safe?” Beverly questions, concern in her eyes that I haven’t seen in years.
“I’m safe from the Wraiths, yes.”
Bev tilts her head and falls back in her chair. Her arms cross over her chest. She looks different. A little brighter in the cheeks. Is she wearing makeup? Maybe just some mascara and a hint of color over her lips. Her mouth doesn’t look so pursed, but loose, as if she’s been practicing grinning more often. She still wears a sweatshirt that looks too big for her and some outdated jeans, though.
“What are you not safe from, then?”
“Nathan,” I sigh.
“Why? Did he hurt you when you had sex?” I marvel a moment at the cavalier manner of this conversation. When I was young and twenty-one, my sister never would have discussed such things with me, but now …
“No, he didn’t hurt me.” I grin unwittingly, recalling with pleasure all the things he did do to me. His lips. His tongue. His fingers.
“Knoxville called, they can see your blush from there,” Bev teases and I cover my face with both hands.
“It cannot,” I mumble into my hands, the weight on my shoulders lifting a little at my sister’s unusually good mood.
“Bev, did something happen to you? You seem different today.” The words tumble out of my mouth before I think what I’m asking, and I reach across the table as if I owe her an apology.
“What? No.” she stammers while her face flushes. “My goodness, what would make you say such a thing. No.” Huh. Her adamant huff adds to my suspicion, while her eyes avoid mine and she swipes back at hair severely contained in a bun. There’s a hint of something behind her emphatic defense. “Let’s stay focused here, Naomi. You. Nathan.”
Her tone reminds me once again of our mother, but I smile in spite of myself.
Me. Nathan.
Suddenly, the kitchen door flies open and in walks Jedd making a beeline for my sister. She holds up two hands like she intends to stop him, turning her face from him as panicked eyes meet mine. Jedd stops short, his pace faltering before he sees me.
“I didn’t realize you had company,” he says, halting in his quest for Bev and glancing from her to me. “I apologize.”
“No worries,” I offer, my eyes digging a hole in the side of my sister’s head, as she’s refusing to look at me.
“Bev, I …” he begins and then stops. His lips clamp shut. He pivots on his work boots and storms back toward the door. It slams behind him and all the oxygen seems to leave the room along with him.
“What was that?” I ask, trying to catch my breath at the tension flaring between my sister and this strange man living in her barn.
“Nothing,” she mutters, her voice sad.
“That didn’t feel like nothing to me,” I say.
We remain silent as Bev’s eyes reach for the back door. Jedd is definitely attractive, but his stern expression and angular face do nothing for me compared to Nathan’s more jovial, scruffy cheeks.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” I ask.
“No,” she whispers, and I grow concerned.
“Bev, you can talk to me.” She shakes her head.
“Let’s just stick to Nathan.” She eyes me a moment before her face falls. “You said he was involved in the accident with Jebediah?”
The guilt still stabs through me, just not as strongly as it did before. Nathan and I have talked about that night too much. We’ll probably talk about it again, but we can’t change it. And we can’t live with what-ifs.
“Can you handle that?”
I nod, understanding her meaning. “I need to forgive myself. And Nathan.”
“He didn’t cause the accident, Nae Nae.” We’ll never know who was at fault. That’s what an accident is.
“Are you thinking you’re in love with him?”
“Yes. No. I don’t know,” I reply, but I’m not fooling anyone, least of all myself. My elbows come to the table and I cover my face again.
“It’s okay, you know? If you do.” I peek through my fingers at her. Her face softens and the old sister, the one I had as a kid, returns. How I’ve missed her.
“Doesn’t it seem fast?”
“How long you been waiting on him, Naomi?” Eighteen years. Eighteen years for a second chance. Is it too late? Then I think of last night. The connection with him. The sweet way we danced. His apology. And mine.
Jebediah would want me to live and I haven’t been living. I’ve been hiding inside myself. Alone for too long. Another sharp zap of guilt taps at me. He’d be so disappointed I wasn’t living life to the fullest, which had been his motto, even if he did live a little too full.
“Too long,” I mutter in response to Bev’s question.
“He’s here now, so it seems you’ve waited long enough.” Her eyes trail back to the door leading to her yard. Her voice lowers as she says, “Let love in.” And I wonder if she’s talking about me or herself.
Much to my surprise, my sister suggests we go shopping for the afternoon. Retail therapy. She wanted some new clothes and I don’t object. I’m not a woman of fashion. I don’t get worked up about styles and trends. For a long time, my clothes have been a shield of deflection. Loose fitting, long covering, and I’ve been hidden inside them. I’ve even made many of my own clothes, but I’ve been feeling a change brewing inside for a while. Long before Nathan, I’ve felt as if I was ready for something different.
On Monday, I arrive to work in a new dress. It’s a deep red, one of my favorite colors, but it’s a little shorter than my usual style, hitting just above the knee and exposing just a hint of cleavage. It might be a bit much for the library, but after spending the day with his daughters, Nathan called me last night.
Date number we-are-no-longer-counting. Be ready after your shift.
He assured me Clementine was showing no signs of stress and even Dahlia remained home on a Sunday to spend time as a family. They played an old-fashioned board game until Clem earned the most money and Dahlia stormed out saying Nathan cheated on Clem’s behalf.
I don’t understand women, he had sighed. I assured him, I thought he did.
When I enter the librarian office, Julianne sits in her swivel chair, staring at the computer. Her face looks grave until she sees me.
“What’s wrong?”
Uh-oh, here comes the falling sky. Then I shake my head. I will not think like this anymore.
“We received an email stating there’s a hold on our closure. There aren’t any more details other than that we should wait for additional instruction before removing the books. We have a conference call later this afternoon to discuss this further. Can you stay a little later?”
“Um … sure.” Nathan will understand, but my heart sinks. I don’t want to give up a date with him. Julianne takes in my dress and then her brows pinch, but she doesn’t comment. Instead, I ask, “Were we planning on removing the books?”
“The liquidation procedure includes selling them off or donating them to other lib
raries, but we hadn’t received a directive, so I hadn’t scheduled us to move forward either way.” I shiver at the thought of liquidation. It sounds so final. I peek out the office window to the silent shelves. It’d be like I was selling off a piece of my soul, one book at a time.
“Well, let’s hope this is a sign of good things to come.” I nod to Julianne who is staring at me, her head tilted.
Can she see what I’ve done? Logically, I know it isn’t possible to physically notice I’ve had sex, but I feel as if I look different, and I know I do in this dress.
“You look different today,” Julianne states as she eyes the rich red color before dropping to my knees under the hem. Under the probing eyes of my boss, maybe I’m more exposed than I considered. “Is that a new dress?”
“This?” I hedge, pretending I don’t notice. “I did a little shopping this weekend.”
“I’m assuming you’re wearing it for a certain someone,” Julianne asks, an eyebrow twitching upward.
“Well … um … actually, I do have a date after my shift.” When Julianne’s forehead wrinkles and her eyes widen in surprise, I step forward, waving my hands at her. “But I can stay if the library needs me. I mean, I can go to any meeting you need. Nathan will understand.”
“Will he?” Julianne nods to the window and I turn to see him standing by the check-out counter with two to go cups in his hands. He’s devastatingly good looking in his leather jacket. His silver hair a little mussed. His scruff a little thicker today. He smiles the second our eyes meet and I’m a puddle on the floor. I turn back for Julianne who waves a hand, dismissing me while she fights a smile. I excuse myself and enter the lobby.
“Hey,” he says, eying my dress.
“Hey. What are you doing here?” His eyes don’t move from my body, starting from my ankles and making their way up my bare legs to the edge of my skirt and climbing over my breasts to the skin above them. My neck turns the shade of my dress and I blink as he catches my eyes.
“Is that what you’re wearing tonight?”
I pull at the skirt, fanning the material. “I guess so. Yes. But now I have to …” My voice fades as Nathan sets the cups on the counter, grabs my hand, and leads me between the stacks. I’m almost tripping over my feet he’s walking so fast. He stops and tips up his head as if he can see over the book shelves he’s pulled me behind. He twists left to right like he’s looking for someone to be watching us and then he cups my face, and before I can ask him what he’s doing, he’s kissing me.
In broad daylight.
In the library.
Between the shelves.
It’s hard and fast and I’m dizzy when he pulls back. He keeps his hands on my face, and my fingers clutch at his biceps, afraid I’ll fall over from the impact of his kiss.
“I’m going to have a hard time concentrating all day knowing you’re waiting for me in this dress.” His eyes skim downward again and then he looks around us, as if he’s noticing for the first time we’re surrounded by books.
“Hey, I have a book I’d like to recommend to you.” His arm remains around my lower back as he scans the shelves a second and pulls out a selection. He hands it to me.
I Have a Penis.
“Sweet Goddess.” I laugh, holding the book. “Library humor?”
“This is where it all started.” His voice drops and I look up at him. “But it’s not gonna end, sweetheart. Seeing you in this dress, there’s been a change of plans for tonight. Up for some adventure?”
I fight a smile, feeling helpless under his gaze. “I’ll take an adventure when you tell me what you are doing here so early?”
“What? I can’t pop in and see my girl?”
The fight gives up and I smile big. “Of course, but—”
“I couldn’t wait to see you again.” There’s something deeper in his words, something unsaid and understood.
My wait for him is over.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Dewey Decimal Classifications: 152.4 Emotions and Feelings
[Nathan]
Change of plans. Just like our first date, I change my mind about where to take Naomi tonight. Seeing her in that red dress gives me an idea and I hope she doesn’t think it’s corny. I happen to think it might be romantic, if a bit understated, and I recruit Todd for some help.
“Do me a solid,” I say to my brother as I call him after leaving Naomi with another heart racing kiss. Who knew the library could be so hot?
I explain to my big brother what I need him to do.
“I’m not breaking any codes for you, and if this backfires in any way, it’s at your expense.”
“Yeah, yeah,” I say, knowing I won’t let anything happen. Not this time. Never again.
The day is long and the crew at work is a little somber. Word of what happened spread fast among the workers, not to mention a cleaning crew had to take care of the mess. There’s still an obvious stain on the floor, but drywall and tile are coming in this week. I’ll be happy to move on to another project.
I pick Naomi up at six instead of five because of her meeting at the library.
“So, what happened?” I hold her hand on my lap as I drive down the dark switchbacks. It’s going to take us an hour to get where we’re going but I’m in no rush.
“It appears we might have a donor for the library, but we aren’t certain yet. Someone from a financial management firm contacted Julianne and wanted some basic information. Most of our financial information is public knowledge but the interview included needs of the library, like a wish list to improve it.” Her fingers rub over my knuckles and I like the feel of her hand in mine. I like how she’s stroking my skin to give herself comfort. Hell, I like everything about this woman.
We drive on, talking about Clem and Dahlia, and the conversations I had with both of them on Sunday. Clem told me about the bullies at her school, and I feel just sick that I hadn’t known. Naomi sheepishly admits that she did.
“First of all, I didn’t know you were her father, and secondly, she didn’t want me to tell you. I didn’t want to betray her trust.” I understand where she’s coming from but if Naomi agrees to become a part of our life, like I want her to, she and I need to come to an understanding. No secrets.
I mention how Dahlia said something about going shopping with Naomi. “That was a surprise,” I admit. Naomi’s lips twist in a knowing grin, and I wonder what other secrets this woman has with my girls.
“Tell her to call me. I accept.” She winks, and my chest constricts. Her getting along with both my girls is what I want next for us.
As we follow the curve of the road, we quiet and I start to think taking Naomi back to where we met might be a mistake. I’m taking her to the Fugitive, but as we slow to curl the Dragon, I worry her thoughts are falling to her brother, which dampens my romantic plans.
“I’m sorry,” I say as we pass the particular spot I don’t think I need to point out to her. “Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all.”
“Is this what you planned to show me?” Her voice lowers, sadness filling it.
“No, sweetheart. No.” My grip on her hand tightens. “I wanted to take you back to the real beginning for us. When we first met.”
I can’t take my eyes off the road, but I feel hers on me. “Why?”
“I want to get it right this time,” I tell her honestly. I pull her hand to my lips and kiss her knuckles. She leans over and kisses my cheek.
“You’re already doing it right,” she whispers and then settles back, leaning her head against my shoulder. Thank goodness for pickup trucks with bench seats.
When we finally arrive at the Fugitive, I escort Naomi to the bar, but she asks for the bathroom before I take a seat. Todd nods his head at me as I sit on a stool.
“Got everything all set?” My body hums with excitement. I can’t wait to see the surprise on Naomi’s face. Todd shakes his head at me in mock disgust.
“You owe me,” he states, and I will. He won’t forget it
. “Give me five minutes.” We both look in the direction of Naomi as she crosses the crowded space, heading right for me. She stops at the stool I pull out for her, and Herbie, an old guy who spends too much time at the Fugitive, glances over at us. “You’re not Charlese.”
“Who’s Charlese?” Naomi asks and the wind knocks out of my sails a little bit. Todd shakes his head again, adding a chuckle as he steps away, leaving me to explain myself.
“What?” I choke, pretending I didn’t hear her. I don’t want to talk about another woman tonight. This could get complicated.
“She asked you, who is Charlese?” Big Poppy offers as he comes up behind me and smacks me twice between the shoulder blades, presumably helping me recover from my throat spasm. Where did he come from?
“I heard her the first time,” I mutter, regaining my voice and twisting to glare at my brother’s best friend.
“Then why’d you ask what she said?” he mutters, crossing his thick arms as he looks between Naomi and me.
“I’m Big Poppy,” he states, offering her a hand and appraising her dress. Don’t look at her like that, I want to hiss, turning a little caveman. She looks smoking hot chewing her lip as she’s waiting out my answer. I want to kiss the scowl off those red lips.
“Walk away,” I snap under my breath to Big Poppy, keeping my eyes on Naomi who’s still waiting.
“Just trying to help a pal.” He chuckles as he pats me one more time, pitching me off my barstool and into Naomi. I catch her by the upper arms as I stumble into her. She collides against my chest. Suddenly, I’m thrown back in time.
A girl with raven colored hair, wide eyes, and lips made for kissing.
I bumped into her as I wasn’t paying attention where I was walking. I caught her by the arms, and she caught me off guard. She was so beautiful she took my breath away.
“Naomi,” I whisper, my head falling forward intending to land on her forehead.
Love in Due Time Page 30
