Cara set the plates on the table, and she and Grace sat down. Cara bowed her head, and Grace quickly did the same, although she didn’t close her eyes. “Lord, we thank you for this food and for the blessings of the day. In Jesus’ name, amen.” Cara looked up and smiled. “Now let’s see how you like eggs Benedict.”
Grace took a bite of the dish, and her eyes widened with surprise. “Hey, it’s good!” she said, taking another bite, followed quickly with a taste of cinnamon roll. “Nothing wrong with my appetite. I’ll be fat as a pig if I keep this up.”
“I don’t think so. Nobody on my side of the family or Phil’s is really heavy. It’s a blessing. We seem to be able to eat anything and not gain much weight.”
The two women finished their breakfast and sat drinking coffee while Cara told Grace about her family. “We’re going to have a family reunion in about a month. I want you to meet them all.”
“They won’t be happy to meet me,” Grace said.
“Of course they will.”
“No they won’t.” Pushing the plate away from her, she said, “I don’t belong here, Cara. I just don’t fit in.”
“Yes you do. Before you were born, God gave me a wonderful promise concerning you. I didn’t understand it when I thought you had died, but now we’re going to see it happen.”
“It’s too late for me.” Grace thought for a moment and said, “Kev and me, we’re misfits. We won’t ever be nothin’ but what we are.”
Cara leaned forward and put her hand over Grace’s. She noticed the strength of it and the beautifully textured skin, but she was thinking of other things. “Jesus loves misfits. He always seemed to be looking for people like that. Did you ever hear of the woman at the well in Samaria?”
“No.”
It amazed Cara that this girl had heard nothing of the Bible. She began to tell the story according to the Gospel of John, stressing that Jesus had gone out of His way to find the Samarian woman, and when He found her, He showed such love for her that she trusted Him completely.
“She sounds about like me, that woman, with all those men.” Grace’s eyes narrowed, for this was, in fact, a confession. “I haven’t been a good girl. It’s too late to do anything about that.”
“There’s always a fresh start. Just like the woman at the well. The Bible doesn’t tell us what became of her, but I’m sure she became a virtuous woman after that.”
“She might be, but I’m not.”
Cara yearned to put her arms around her daughter, but it was too soon for that. The wall Grace had built was too high, and the problems were too sharp and keen in Grace’s mind for that to happen just yet. “Why don’t we take a walk around the grounds?” Cara suggested. “Maybe go out and watch Kev work on the car.”
Grace was disturbed by the conversation. She felt grubby and unclean around a woman like Cara Winslow, and she quickly offered, “I’ll wash the dishes first.”
****
Brian Winslow loved his work and rarely took time off from it. But for the last few days Brian had been thinking deeply about the problem that had exploded like a bomb in the Winslow family. He could not put Grace out of his mind, and finally at noon he left his office and drove out to the estate. As he pulled up the drive he saw Grace walking across the lawn. He parked the car and went out to meet her. “Hello, Grace,” he said cautiously.
Grace turned quickly. “Hi, Brian,” she said warily.
“How’s it been going with you?” Brian tried to smile in a friendly manner, but inside he wondered, Why doesn’t Mother get her more suitable clothes? Aloud he said, “Did you see that bed of tulips Kev put in? They’re starting to come up.”
“Yes, he showed them to me.”
“He’s made a showplace out of this estate. He could make a lot of money in a landscaping business, but he won’t listen to me. I’ve tried to talk him into it several times. He’s just wasting his life.”
“Maybe he knows he couldn’t handle facing the public.”
Brian shook his head. He looked handsome there in the afternoon light, the sun touching his slightly curly, rich auburn hair, his eyes clear, and his chin strong and determined. He was trim and fit, and there was an enthusiasm about him, the air of one who had never been hurt.
“Come along,” Brian said. “I’ll walk with you to the fish pond.”
As they walked along together, Grace said, “How come you’re not workin’ today?”
“Oh, I took off early. I thought I’d come out and have a talk with you.”
Instantly Grace grew defensive. Up to this point Brian had shown nothing but disapproval for her, and she could not imagine that he would feel any differently now. They reached the fish pond, and Brian cast a look at the fish shimmering in the clear water. A small waterfall, run by a pump, created a pleasant trickling sound. Brian turned to face Grace squarely. “I just wanted to see if I could help you find your way, Grace. I know you’ve had a hard time, but it seems to me you’re making it tough on yourself.”
“You mean because I got drunk twice and shamed your family?”
The harsh words made Brian’s eyebrows rise, and he saw her body stiffen. “There’s no need to get antagonistic,” he said quickly. “I just want to help you.”
“It’s clear you don’t like me, Brian. You’re sorry I showed up. You and Paige have made that pretty plain.”
A flush suffused Brian’s face, for she had touched on the exact truth. “You shouldn’t talk like that. We’ve got to make the best of what you are.”
“What am I, Brian?”
“Well, you’re what life has made you, I suppose. But it’s never too late for someone to change.”
“When are you gonna change?”
“What do you mean?”
“You don’t think you need to change?”
“I’m not the one who dresses like a—” He was angry, but he caught the word before it came out.
“Like a tramp? Is that what you were gonna say? Let me tell you something, Mr. Brian Winslow. All your life you’ve had everything handed to you on a silver platter. You’re nothing but a spoiled brat and a stuck-up snob!”
Ordinarily Brian was a self-controlled young man, but her comment stung and he allowed his temper to get the better of him. “You’re a fine one to be calling me names! Why, you’re nothing but a cheap, low woman!”
Grace cursed him and stomped away. She was so angry she did not know where she was going. She just headed across the grounds until she was out of sight of Brian before slowing down and trying to calm herself. “Why do I let him get to me?” she whispered under her breath. “He’s nothing but a stuck-up snob! He’s not at all like Phil and Cara. He and Paige are both snobs, and I’ll never have anything to do with them!”
****
Kevin carefully removed a bolt and dropped it into a bucket of gasoline, then was about to remove another when he heard someone calling his name. He turned around to see Grace enter the garage. “Hi, Grace. Come to help me work on the car?”
Her encounter with Brian was still fresh on her mind, but Grace was calmer now. “I’m just bored.”
“Why, there’s no point in that. Why don’t you go shopping with Paige? She told me she intends to take you.”
Grace studied the tall young man before her. He was different from Paige and Brian, and it wasn’t just because of his scars. Both Phil and Cara had told her how outgoing and winsome a child Kevin had been until the accident. Now he hid himself away, tinkering with cars and working on the grounds, afraid to face life. Without intending to be mean, she said, “Kev, how can you bury yourself in this place?”
Kevin looked at her without showing the scarred side of his face. “What brought that on, sis?”
It touched Grace to hear him call her sis. She would not have cared for such a title from Brian or Paige, but she welcomed it from Kevin. She knew he had a genuine concern for her, just as she knew Brian and Paige did not. “It just bothers me that you hide yourself away. Why don’t you get out
and find a life?”
“I can’t do that, Grace.”
“Look, you’ve had some bad luck. Your face is scarred, but the scars are a bigger deal to you than they are to other people.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about. You haven’t had to look into people’s eyes and see the pity. I’ve tried a few times to go out, but I just can’t take the stares.”
Suddenly Grace was fired with a desire to do something for this marred brother of hers. “Come on. Let’s go to town,” she said.
Kevin stared at her. “Go to town for what?”
“Just to look around. To have a good time. You can go shopping with me.”
“I don’t know anything about clothes. I’d feel silly in a dress shop.”
Grace stepped closer and put her hand on Kevin’s arm. “Please come. I can’t stand staying here all alone. The folks are nice enough, but I know Paige and Brian don’t want me here.”
“They’ll come around.”
“Look, until they do, why don’t you and I spend more time together? I can’t help you with cars, but maybe we can go to the zoo or something.”
Kevin laughed. “So you’re after a good time. You’ve come to the wrong person for that.”
“I don’t believe you. We can find something fun to do together. Will you come?”
Kevin suddenly wanted to go. At that moment the thought of working on the cars or planting flowers lost its appeal. He had no hope that he would ever have much of a life, but he had hopes for Grace and wanted to do all he could to make her feel better about her new life. “All right,” he said, “but I’m not much fun.”
“You will be. Now, get out of those greasy old clothes.”
****
The expedition proved successful for both Kevin and Grace. He took her to town, and the two of them went to the zoo. Grace had seen animals at the carnivals she had been in but had never visited a zoo before. Together they laughed at the antics of the monkeys and were impressed by the majestic strength and beauty of the tigers. They ate hot dogs and ice cream and talked a great deal.
Grace noticed that though Kevin might laugh at times, he was always conscious of the looks he got from people. Some of them stared at him with a total lack of manners; others took one look and quickly averted their eyes, which must have been just as painful for Kevin. She learned during those brief hours how hard it was for him, and she tried hard to encourage him.
Once a little girl pointed at him and said, “What’s wrong with that man’s face, Mommy?” The mother quickly shushed the child, but Grace saw that the remark had pierced him like a sword.
“Don’t mind her,” Grace said. “She’s just a kid.”
“I know. I’m used to it,” Kevin muttered.
After they had watched every animal in the zoo, Grace said, “I’m hungry. Let’s go buy the most expensive meal we can find.”
“I’d really rather not go into a fancy place.”
“How about an unfancy one then.”
Not far from the zoo they found a place called Pete’s Bar and Grill. They ordered steaks and Grace ordered a cocktail for herself. She insisted that he have a drink, but he said, “Nothing for me.”
“You can at least have some wine,” Grace persisted. “That won’t hurt you.”
“I don’t know about that,” he said doubtfully. But he was overruled, and before he knew it, there was a bottle of wine on the table and a glass in his hand. “I’ve never tasted wine before.” He took an uneasy sip.
“Do you like it?”
“I shouldn’t be drinking it.”
“Oh, come on, it’s only wine. It’s not hard liquor. I’d be the one to get drunk if anybody does.” She laughed at the expression on his face. “Don’t worry,” she said. “I’m not going to.”
Grace was true to her word. She did not get drunk—but Kevin did!
He drank two glasses of wine before their meal arrived and then had more afterward. He was listening to Grace tell about her life and was so interested, he didn’t realize how much wine he was drinking. It was quite a lot more than his uninitiated system could stand.
Grace became aware that Kevin’s speech was getting slurred, and she knew that Cara and Phil would not like it—and certainly Brian and Paige would have a fit. “I think that’s enough wine for tonight,” she said. “We’d better get you home.”
“Home? I’m all right,” Kevin said, pronouncing each syllable distinctly. “I’m just a little bit ...” He blinked several times and could not finish.
“You wait here while I go to the ladies’ room. Then we’ll leave.”
“All right, sis.”
Grace went to the ladies’ room, thinking, I gotta sober him up quick. They’ll throw me out for sure if I take him home in this condition.
When she returned, she found a woman standing beside Kevin whose face was heavily painted and whose dress was quite revealing. She had her hand on Kevin’s shoulder and was saying, “Come along with me, honey. We’ll have us a good time.”
Grace intervened loudly. “That’s my honey you’re talkin’ to. Come on, Kev.”
“This is Doris.”
“Glad to meetcha, Doris. Now good-bye.”
The prostitute sneered and found someone else to approach.
“Good-bye, Doris,” Kevin said. “She’s a nice girl, isn’t she?” he said to Grace. “That’s Doris.”
“I know,” she said, pulling Kevin to his feet. “Come on. It’s time to go home.”
“Wait a minute. I’m a little dizzy. Where’d Doris go?”
“She’s gone. Come on.”
She paid the bill and led Kevin out of the restaurant. When she got to the car, he started for the driver’s side, but she said, “Oh no. I’ll drive home.”
“I can drive,” he insisted.
“No you can’t. You get in and sit down.” She put him in the passenger seat, shut the door, then went around and started the car. As she drove, Kevin kept muttering, “That Doris, she was a nice girl. She liked me.”
“Yes, Kev, I know she did.” Poor baby! He has no idea in the world what sort of woman she was. Before long he fell asleep and slumped down, his head against the window.
“I shouldn’t have done this,” she moaned. “It was wrong. Poor guy! Never had a drink in his life.”
When she got home, she stopped the car and went around to the passenger side.
She heard her name called and saw Paige rushing toward the car. “Where have you been?”
“Kev and I went out.”
“Went out where?” Paige demanded, her eyes flashing. She looked inside and said, “What’s wrong with Kev? Is he hurt?”
By this time Cara and Phil had reached them. “What’s wrong with Kev?” Phil echoed.
There was no hiding it from them. “He’s had a little too much to drink,” Grace admitted.
Paige opened the door and Kevin slumped out, almost falling on the ground before she caught him and propped him on the seat. “You’ve gotten him drunk!” she accused.
“Grace, you shouldn’t have done that!” Cara said sharply.
“I know it, but—”
Phil pulled Kevin out of the car.
Kevin came alert and said, “Hey, Dad!”
“Hello, son.”
“Where’s Doris?” Kevin asked.
“Who’s Doris?” Paige snapped.
“Doris is a nice girl. She liked me.”
At that moment Grace would have given practically anything to start the evening over again. She had known all along that it was wrong, but somehow she had justified it by saying he never had any fun. But now, looking at the disapproval in the faces of her parents and the furious rage in Paige, she had no defense.
“Congratulations, Grace, you’ve managed to drag Kevin down to your level!”
“At least I took him out of this prison, dear sister! What did you ever do for him?”
“That’s enough, both of you,” Phil said crisply. “Come along, Kev
. Time to go to bed.”
“All right, Dad.”
Kevin required Phil’s help to keep him steady, but he turned around and put his hand on Grace’s shoulder. “It was a fine day,” he mumbled. “We’ll do it again.”
Grace looked at the scarred face with pity and knew that no matter how much Paige hated her and her parents were disappointed in her, she truly cared for Kevin. “Good night, Kev,” she said. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
As Phil and Cara took Kevin inside, Grace said to Paige, “I was wrong. I shouldn’t have done it.”
Paige was pale with anger. “How could you do such a thing? You took advantage of him!”
“I didn’t mean to hurt him. It seems like I always do the wrong things.”
Paige shrugged her shoulders wearily. “Yes, you do.” She followed the others, leaving Grace alone beside the car.
Grace sighed with remorse, but at the same time she made a resolution. I went about it the wrong way, but I’ll find a way to help Kev. I know I will.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“What Do You Really Want?”
The next morning it rained heavily, and after breakfast Grace went back to her room with a movie magazine and the latest tabloid newspaper she had bought the day before. She sat cross-legged on the bed to peruse them, not having anything else to do.
She glanced over the headline story about the German dictator Hitler, but she cared little for politics in her own country, much less in Europe. Another story was entitled “Defeating Demon Rum,” and she read it quickly and then tossed the paper aside. “People are gonna drink—and that’s all there is to it!” she murmured.
Bored with the paper, she read the movie magazine but didn’t find it much more interesting. She thought of Hack Keller and wondered if he had found a new partner to ride the cycle around the Ring of Death. For a fleeting moment she missed her life with the Royal Shows—at least it had kept her busy. Of course, she had hated it most of the time, but the past sometimes looks better in light of the present.
Finally she got up and, seeing that the rain had stopped, went downstairs. She stopped in the kitchen looking for a snack.
The Virtuous Woman Page 12
