Going Home

by Mohr, Nicholasa

  “It’s okay with me if it’s all right with your mother.”

  I turned toward my mother. “Mami? Say it’s okay. Please, please!”

  “Bueno ... okay.” My mother heaved a big sigh. “But we just try it, that’s all, and then see how it goes. There is nothing definite, you understand?”

  “Terrific. Thanks, Mami! Vinny will really be happy.”

  “And if you want to practice Spanish with me, you just let me know,” said Tio Jorge.

  “Thank you, I will, Tio.”

  “We’ll look out for her, Mami,” said Johnny. That really annoyed me. Nobody had asked for his two cents. But I thought I’d better leave things alone, since everything was going good. Tito, to my surprise, said nothing. I looked up at him, and when our eyes met, I silently thanked him.

  Mami decided that Vinny and I would meet after school at four o’clock on Mondays and Thursdays and work for an hour. The lessons would be at my house. After a few weeks, if everything worked out okay between Vinny and me, we could talk about alternating one week at my house and one week at his house. But for now lessons were to be right in our living room, where Mami could watch us.

  It was Thursday of the first week and we were up to our second lesson. As I was waiting for Vinny, I overheard Mami talking to Tio Jorge. “That boy has wonderful manners, Tio Jorge, and it’s a pleasure talking with him. There is something about the way children are brought up in a Latino culture that is missing here. They are taught to respect their elders. Imagine, Vinny is only twelve and already he’s un hombrecito. I wish our Tito acted as well. That’s why I’m glad we are all going to Puerto Rico and that Felita will be staying the whole summer. Maybe my kids will learn and see things the way we used to.”

  “He’s a good boy, Rosa,” Tio Jorge agreed. “I’m going to invite him to look at my nature collection.” When I heard that, I knew Tio Jorge liked Vinny, because he doesn’t offer to show his collection to just anybody.

  I had to admit that I was really beginning to like Vinny. And I mean a lot; like maybe more than friends. But I didn’t want to become all gushy and dopey like the way my girlfriends acted with him at school. And besides, I didn’t even know if he liked me—in that way, I mean. The whole idea made me so nervous that I decided I wasn’t gonna think about it too much. I’d just concentrate real hard on our lessons and see what happened.

  When Vinny came, he brought me two books in Spanish—a second grade reader and a book of children’s stories with colorful pictures. I found that I could read and understand most of the children’s stories, but with the reader there were a lot of words and phrases I didn’t quite get. This weekend my brother Johnny was taking me to a bookstore where we could buy a Spanish/English dictionary. Tio Jorge had given me the money for it. He figured I should be well prepared in Spanish when I got to Puerto Rico.

  When Vinny lived in Colombia, he had seen the Star Wars movies and really loved them. After I told him I had all the paperbacks—Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi—he got real excited and asked if we could work with these books. I had dug them out and now I gave them to him. But he just nodded and looked upset.

  “Hey, what’s up? I thought you wanted these books,” I said. Most of the time we still spoke in Spanish.

  “I do, it’s not that. In fact they’re really great. It’s something else.” He sounded real serious.

  “What else?”

  “Felita, you gotta help me with a word that’s not in the English dictionary.”

  “Sure. What is it?”

  “It’s called ‘bimbo.’ ”

  “Where did you hear that?” I started laughing, but he got so upset that I stopped.

  “Joey Ramos and some of the other boys stopped me and told me I was going to have a new nickname. From now on, they said, they were calling me ‘Bimbo Vinny.’ They said it means being smart. But I figured they were lying and it probably means something else, something bad. Am I right?”

  “You’re right, Vinny, it doesn’t mean smart. It means just the opposite—stupid or dummy.”

  “You see? I was right! I knew it just by the expressions on their faces and the way they were all laughing.”

  “What did you do?”

  “Don’t worry, I stood up to them and spoke to them in English. I said, ‘No way! You don’t call me this. Please to call me by my name. Vinny, understand? That is my only name, Vinny!’ ”

  “You told them that? You said ‘no way’?”

  “Was that good, what I told them, Felita?”

  “You did great! Vinny, you’re learning fast. It just proves how smart you are and what a bunch of ‘bimbos’ they all are.”

  “Don’t worry, Felita. When I get real good at speaking English, I’ll tell them a lot more. Listen, I’m real happy to be taking these lessons with you.”

  After our lesson Mami walked in, acting real friendly, and asked us to come into the kitchen. She had set out two tall glasses of milk and two plates of her homemade bread pudding.

  “You two have been working hard. I thought that before Vinny goes home he’d like a little bit of bread pudding. It’s Puerto Rican style. I make it with brown sugar. I hope you like it, Vinny.”

  Mami makes the best bread pudding in the world. This was a treat all right. Usually we only got to eat it on Sundays. She asked him all about school and our lessons.

  “Mrs. Maldonado, Felita is a fine teacher, and I am very grateful that you allow her to help me,” he said.

  “Well, you two just keep up the good work,” she said. Now I knew she really liked him. When I walked Vinny to the door and we said good-bye, we exchanged glances, knowing we were both relieved that Mami approved of our lessons.

  Our lessons were going so good that Vinny asked that during his part of the lesson we only speak in English. Even though he still had a Spanish accent, he hardly made any bad mistakes. But still he asked me so many questions about English that he practically made me dizzy. For example, he wanted to know the meaning of “far out,” and no matter how hard I tried to explain it, he couldn’t seem to get it.

  “It means something good, yes, Felita? Like you win a race in the fastest time. Right?”

  “Not exactly, Vinny. It just has to be something unexpected. Like, imagine if you got a new pair of real racing skates that the other kids have never even seen except on T.V. in the roller derby. My brother Tito got himself a pair and when he skates, doing all kinds of great tricks that you never see other kids do, people say, ‘Far out!’ Now do you understand?”

  “Ah ha! Yes, Felita. Listen, for example, when I am learning and talking English so good, soon the kids in school will be telling me, ‘Vinny, far out!’ Is correct?”

  “You got it!” I held out my hand palm up and Vinny slapped it.

  “All right!” he shouted. This was something he saw the other boys do and now we practiced it all the time.

  My Spanish was coming along pretty good except that Vinny’s Colombian accent confused me when I was pronouncing words in Spanish. When I told him that, Vinny just laughed and began speaking Spanish more like me.

  “I’m telling you, Felita, not only am I going to talk in English like you, but when I speak Spanish, I’m going to sound exactly like a Puerto Rican!”

  Vinny was real pleased with my progress. He said that now I was speaking and understanding a lot better. When I got to Puerto Rico, he was sure I would have no problems with Spanish. I wished I could be as sure. Before I started taking lessons with Vinny, I never even thought about speaking Spanish all that good. I felt the same way as my brothers, like I’d get by. But now I was beginning to worry a little. After all, I was gonna be there the whole summer; I wasn’t leaving after two weeks, like them.

  I had kept my promise and didn’t tell any of the kids at school about our lessons, except for Gigi. I had to tell her, since we always told each other everything. But I still hadn’t told her how I really felt about Vinny. Somehow I couldn’t talk about these feelin
gs ... not even to Gigi. I mean, what if Vinny didn’t like me in the same way? I’d really look stupid.

  So far me and Vinny had made believe that we really didn’t know each other very well when we were in school. And even though I enjoyed this special secret between the two of us, I was getting real anxious to tell my friends about it. Finally, after over a month of lessons, Vinny’s English was so much better that we both agreed next week I could tell everyone about our private lessons.

  Chapter 4

  “I don’t believe you, Felita,” Vivian was saying. “I’ll bet you are making the whole thing up!”

  “No, she’s not either!” Gigi backed me up. “It’s all true. Vinny and Felita have been having lessons now for over a whole month. Right?” Gi looked at me.

  “Right, but you all don’t have to believe me, because when Vinny gets here, I can prove it’s all true. He’s having lunch with us today. I asked him to come over and eat with us.”

  “Wow. Far out!” said Elba. “But how come you never said anything before to us?”

  “Because we wanted to wait and see if the lessons worked out good. They have and so now you all know.”

  “How’s he doing with his English?” asked Lydia.

  “He’s speaking much better now, but you can see for yourselves.” I waved to Vinny, who was heading toward us with his lunch tray. It was great to see the expressions on everybody’s faces. For once Vivian’s mouth opened real wide and not a word came out.

  “Here, Vinny.” Gigi, who was sitting right across the way from me, slid over so that Vinny could sit down.

  “Hi, how is everybody?” Vinny made sure he greeted everyone. One thing I was finding out about Vinny Davila, he sure was polite. “Did you get your mother’s permission to meet at my house?” he asked me.

  “Yes, she said that next week we can meet at your house and see how that works out.”

  “Great!” Vinny grinned, looking real pleased. “Felita has told you all how she’s been helping me to speak in English, yes?”

  “Oh, yeah,” said Consuela, “and I think that’s terrific. You sound real better already.”

  “You sure do,” Elba added. “In fact you are sounding more like one of us.”

  “Thank you. I feel is an improvement too. That’s because Felita is such a good teacher.”

  “I’ll bet she is”—Vivian leaned over toward Vinny —“but I’m sure you’re very good at giving lessons too.” She put a stupid smirk on her face when she spoke to me. “How’s your Spanish, Felita? Improving too, I’ll bet.”

  “Yes, it is,” I said wondering what she was up to.

  “Excellent.” I saw Vivian wink at Lydia and Elba. “You know I never would have guessed that you two were so close.” I could feel myself blushing. What was she trying to say, anyway?

  Vivian smiled sweetly at Vinny and then stood up. “Well, I gotta go. I have to check up on something in the library. You coming, Lydia?” Lydia stood and followed Vivian. When they were only a short distance away, Vivian turned around and said loudly, “Good luck with your lessons, Felita and Vinny. I sure hope you both learn a whole lot of good things together!”

  That Vivian always has to have the last word! I could feel myself burning up with embarrassment. But when I looked up at Vinny, he was eating calmly. I just hoped he didn’t get what I thought she was trying to say.

  Later that night as I lay in bed, trying to study the grammar in my Spanish reader, all I could think of was Vinny. When Vivian had made her nasty remarks that afternoon, I was embarrassed because I liked Vinny so much. Lately even my trip to Puerto Rico had seemed less important than being with him. In fact I could hardly wait for Mondays and Thursdays so we could have our lessons and be together. I was getting to like him as much as I liked Gigi, only it was different. When I am with Gigi, I feel secure and happy because I know I can share all my secrets with her, and she will always understand. With Vinny, I get this feeling of excitement like I wanna put my arms around him and give him a big hug. Just looking at the way he laughs or puts his head over to one side makes me feel great. We don’t even have to talk! Sometimes just being in the same room with him makes me feel delirious with joy! But I’m also worried. What if he doesn’t feel the same way?

  How I wished my grandmother was alive so I could talk to her. I just couldn’t help wondering why my getting older had to make things so complicated. When I was little, life was a lot simpler. But now my brothers were in charge of me. Mami watched me like I was the gold in Fort Knox and someone was gonna steal me! Plus I knew now that I wanted Vinny to be my boyfriend. Was this wrong?

  Mami would never understand. But my abuelita would have, and she would have told me what to do. She would help me and together we could figure all this out. Why, oh, why did she have to die? Why couldn’t it have been Tio Jorge instead of her? Right after I thought this, I felt guilty and I spoke out loud. “Forgive me, Abuelita, I really didn’t mean it. I know how much you love Tio and I love him too, honest. It’s only that right now I’m so confused and I miss you something fierce.” Tears came to my eyes because really I didn’t want Tio to die. I know how much he loves all of us. All I wanted was for Abuelita to come back to me.

  The only person I could talk to was Gigi. So I decided to feel her out, introduce the subject and see what she thought. Maybe she could tell me if what I felt was right, if I had a chance with Vinny or was way off base. No matter what, I knew I could trust her.

  That next Saturday when Gigi and me sat in her room, listening to her cassette player, I brought up the subject of Vinny, trying to sound real casual.

  “Gi, do you think Vinny likes Vivian?”

  “What? Are you crazy? He doesn’t even look her way.”

  “Oh, I thought maybe you had observed something about him that I didn’t.”

  “What I observed about Vinny Davila ain’t got nothing to do with Vivian.”

  “You mean he might like someone else?” I asked.

  “He sure does.”

  I turned my eyes away from Gigi. “Who do you think she is?”

  “Come on, Felita”—Gigi caught my eye and smiled —“don’t be telling me you don’t know.”

  “I don’t!” I kept on pretending I didn’t know what she meant.

  “You know he likes you. Admit it, Felita. And you like him too.” That’s all I wanted to hear. I couldn’t keep a straight face anymore.

  “Oh, Gigi, you’re right. I’m really crazy about him. I just hope he likes me the same way.”

  “I think you will be Vinny’s girl. And it’s gonna happen soon.”

  “Wow. I hope so. If he asks me to be his girl, he’s getting a loud YES!” We hugged. I could tell Gigi was real happy for me. “There’s only one big problem if that happens, though, and that’s Mami. If she knew how I felt about Vinny, she’d kill me and stop the lessons for sure.”

  “So just make sure she doesn’t find out. Act real cool, and don’t say a word to her.”

  “I guess so. You know what really burns me up? My brothers can get away with murder and nobody says anything to them. For instance, Tito can come in the house and say that some girl has fine legs, or is really built, and my parents just laugh. Like it’s all so funny, right? Me, I wouldn’t dare say a word about Vinny. They say I’m wrong to feel I should be treated like my brothers. Gi, do you think I’m wrong to feel like that?”

  “No, you’re absolutely right, Felita. You should be equal to your brothers. You’re even smarter than them. They can’t draw like you, right? Why should boys get more privileges than girls just because they are boys? Doris told me that if I had a brother, we’d be treated the same.”

  “You’re so lucky, Gigi. I wish Mami could be like Doris. It’s not that I don’t love Mami, because I know she does care for me, but I never can talk to her. She doesn’t believe I have problems. I mean it! She thinks I have this perfect life.”

  “I know I’m lucky because Doris doesn’t treat me like most P.R. mothers treat the
ir daughters. She’s more modern.”

  “Even a lot of black girls have it easier too. Look at Elba Thomas. She can go out after school, and lately everybody knows she and Eddie Lopez are seeing each other. It’s not some big deep secret. I think the Anglo girls got it the best. Remember when I was friendly with Lynne Coleby last year? Her parents are from here, but her grandparents are from someplace in Europe. Anyway, she can go out anytime, anytime at all, just so long as she tells her mother where she is. When I was hanging out with her, Mami didn’t like it. Whenever Lynne came over to visit, Mami would start.

  “ ‘Why doesn’t she telephone first to find out if you are free to play outside?’—or—‘Don’t her parents care how long she stays visiting you?’—and—‘I don’t believe in them customs, I’m sorry.’

  “Mami got on my case so bad, I had to stop seeing her. Mami only likes me to hang out with girls who are kept real strict. She loves me to be with Consuela. Although she does like you a lot, but that’s because we’ve been tight for so many years.”

  “Don’t worry, Felita. When you grow up, you can go to art college and do what you want. Your parents won’t be able to tell you what to do and your brothers won’t boss you. Besides, soon you’re going to P.R. to spend the whole summer with your Tio Jorge. No parents or brothers, right?”

  “All right!” I felt much better already.

  “When are you going over to Vinny’s house?” asked Gigi.

  “Monday. I hope you’re right about what you said.” I was feeling so excited at the idea of being Vinny’s girl that I could hardly sit still.

  “Don’t worry, Felita, I’m right. You’ll see.”

  The following Monday I was getting ready to go over to Vinny’s house when Mami spoke to me. “Felita, Johnny will be taking you over to Vinny’s house.”

  “What?” I was furious. “Why, Mami? I don’t need no baby-sitter. Vinny only lives down the block, like two minutes away!”

  “Because you are too young to go alone to a stranger’s house and—”