by Jill Shalvis
When she was wriggling, panting, he kissed his way down her belly, pressed open her legs and kissed an inner thigh.
“Jase—”
The single word ended on a rough exhalation as he took his “one more taste,” and then, holding her thighs open with his warm palms, took another.
And another.
“Jason.”
“Love the way you say my name,” he said against her, and then he sighed, licked her one more time, and came up on his knees, pulling her to hers.
She was shuddering, quivering, and she stared at him as he rolled off the bed. “You—we—I…”
“I know.” He looked at her, his hair wild, his eyes hot. “We’ll finish later.”
Okay. Except that hadn’t been what she’d been about to say. She’d been trying to say how mindboggling it was that he could make her feel so beautiful, so turned-on, so blown away, without even trying.
She’d been about to say how unnerving it was to find herself realizing how much more than just a crush this was.
But some things, she realized, were better left unsaid.
12
JASON CLIMBED up the stairs from the garage level of Cece’s condo, and into the kitchen. Wet to his thighs, he pulled a river raft behind him, with two life vests in it. He had a lot on his mind, and not the least was that he’d just had the hottest night of his life.
He wasn’t exactly sure what that meant except it couldn’t be good news that he was goners over one soft, beautiful, tough-as-nails Lizzy Mann.
She stood there, looking at him, and his heart gave one good, hard knock against his ribs. He’d spent twenty-four hours with her, an intensely concentrated twenty-four hours, during which time he’d seen her run the gamut of emotions, and face things most people never had to face.
She was solid. Loyal. Smart.
Yeah, goners was a good word to describe his current condition. A smarter man might have seen this coming, from the moment he’d caught sight of those slay-me eyes. He should have run hard and fast.
Instead, here he was, wrapped around her pinkie, willing to do anything for her.
Which meant he wasn’t just goners, he was screwed a hundred ways to Sunday.
LIZZY STARED at Jason as he came close, dripping everywhere. Her clothes weren’t quite dry yet and they certainly weren’t as warm and toasty as Jason’s arms and body had been all night, but they’d do. With no hot water and no electricity, the morning routine had been simple. She’d “borrowed” Cece’s extra toothbrush—which Jason had been kind enough to let her use first—and pulled on her slightly damp clothes.
“Found our way out of here,” Jason said.
She looked at the raft, then into Jason’s eyes and let out a breath. “Oh, boy.”
“Don’t worry.” He set down the raft and came closer still, pulling her up to her toes to give her a warm, hard kiss. She couldn’t tell him that it wasn’t their mode of transportation that had worried her.
“Find any food?” Jason asked, setting her down, turning to the cabinets.
“A single-track mind,” she said.
“Nope. It’s a double track.” Over his shoulder, he wriggled an eyebrow in her direction, telling her without words what else he could think about.
Impossibly, her lips twitched. “I found some snacks.”
“Great.” He looked around hopefully. “Where?”
They’d had sex.
That thought kept bumping around in her brain, which meant she was the one with the single-track mind. And it’d felt like a hell of a lot more than just sex. They’d connected more than just the required body parts, far more. Truth was, he’d made love to her, and now she felt all soft and dreamy and mushy, and that couldn’t be good. She didn’t work well with soft and dreamy and mushy.
“It’s actually warmer out there than it was yesterday,” Jason said. “Which doesn’t bode well. Warmer air usually means more rain.”
“Yeah.” She’d looked out the window. The rain was still coming down. They were past the twenty-four-inch mark and climbing, and no end was in sight. The winds were still a problem, keeping the power lines down and unsafe. But flooding was the biggest concern. The street outside was nothing but a raging river now, which had overtaken the yards and the bottom floors of every building along it.
Cece’s garage had over four feet of water in it and the level was rising. She’d never seen anything like it except for on the news.
But Jason had. He’d lived it, and it’d cost him dearly. “Here’s what I’ve got.” She revealed the Cheez Whiz and crackers in Cece’s pantry and made him laugh. “I know, my sister has the palette of a puppy, or a twelve-year-old boy.”
“Not seeing the problem,” he said, already plowing his way through the crackers.
“I’m assuming you usually eat more healthy than this.”
“I eat in bigger quantities, that’s for sure.” He stuffed a loaded cracker into her mouth, then opened the cupboard behind her.
She took in his long, lean, tough body. “So how do you keep in such good shape?”
He slid her an amused look, then abandoned his search, hooked an arm around her neck and hauled her in. “Well…I did just burn off a good amount of calories.”
“Yes. Yes, you did.” She felt her cheeks heat. “That was, um…”
His eyes were hot. “Fun?”
“Very. And…”
He arched an eyebrow.
“Good.” And amazing. And brain-cell destroying. And off the charts…“Very good.”
His smile was slow and wickedly sweet, and also wickedly naughty as he backed her up until the wall hit her back. Plastering a hand on either side of her face, he dipped down so that they were at the same eye level. “And that wasn’t even my best work.”
She was turned on and turned upside down by him, but it was so much more than that. He made her laugh, which was possibly the most attractive thing of all. “No?”
“Definitely not.” He kissed her jaw and made his way up to her ear, which he gently sucked into his mouth, making her eyes cross. “I’m starving and tired,” he murmured. “But when this is all over and we’ve slept for about two straight days?” He laughed low and sexy in his throat. “I’ll show you what I’ve got.”
The thought made her knees wobble. “When this is over, I’ll be busy at work.”
“Twenty-four seven?”
She pulled back and met his gaze, which was steady and sure. He was always steady and sure, she knew. Always. “Not twenty-four seven, no.”
“So maybe you’ll find a few hours here and there for me.”
“Is that all you need, Jase? A few hours?”
“Hell, Lizzy…” He ran a hand down her body, squeezing her hip, flashing a little smile. “I don’t know what I’m doing or where I’m going, but I’ll take whatever time there is until I figure it out.”
“In bed?”
He laughed again, softly against her skin. “Now you’re just teasing me.”
The idea of staying in his bed until further notice was intriguing and bone melting, but she knew herself. She knew how she felt about him after only one day. After a few weeks, or whatever he had, she’d have given him her body and heart in unison, and it would kill her. “I want to get moving.”
“I take it that’s a no.”
“Jase.” She sighed. “It has to be.”
“So last night didn’t do anything for you then?”
She thought of how many times he’d made her come, and felt her body respond to just the memory. “There’s more than just sex.”
“Are you dumping me, Lizzy?” he asked softly.
Her heart caught. “Well, it is my turn.”
“I never dumped you.”
“Rejected me, then.”
“And I most definitely never rejected you.”
“Ran scared,” she amended.
“Now that…” He leaned in for another kiss. “That’s the honest truth.” He rubbed his lips over hers. “Luc
kily, I don’t run scared anymore. From anything.”
“No?” She put her hand to his chest to hold him off. And to touch him. God, she was so mixed up. “Well, apparently that’s my thing now.”
His eyes lifted from her mouth and met hers. “So you really are going to run scared.”
His tone suggested the ridiculousness of that, but it didn’t make it not true. She was afraid, afraid of getting hurt. “Maybe I’m running scared of your eating habits.”
Letting her get away with that, he turned back for a deeper foray into the cupboards and she let out a breath. When he came up with a can of ravioli, she shook her head.
“Trust me,” he said. “I’ve eaten a lot worse for breakfast.”
She supposed he had and, looking into his face, which happened to take her breath, she found herself once again marveling at the man he’d become.
“I want to see where this takes us, Lizzy,” he said, finding a can opener and two spoons.
“Hopefully straight to Cece.”
“Not the raft,” he said, handing her a spoon. “You and me. I want to see this thing through.”
“Where it’s going to go is you going back to your job, and me to mine.”
“So black and white, then. No gray?” He fed himself a big bite of cold ravioli, and then her.
She chewed it down and shuddered. “Not when it comes to playing with my emotions.”
His smile faded. “You think I’d play with your emotions?”
“Not on purpose, no.”
He stared at her, then released a low breath. “Okay, so you really let them pull a number on you.”
“Who?”
“Everyone and anyone who’s gone in and out of your life without care. Pick one.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Really? So you’re not this careful and guarded because you’ve never been hurt? Because you don’t feel you can trust anyone?”
“No. Absolutely not.”
“Your parents left you.”
“They died!”
“Still hurts,” he said very quietly. “Still sucks. And they died, leaving a kid to raise a kid.”
“I was an adult.”
“Barely.”
“Jesus, what’s the matter with you?” She stared at him, then turned her back, hugging herself. “I said we’re done and you have to psychoanalyze it? You’ve never been turned down for a second date?”
“Technically, we didn’t have a first date,” he pointed out, pulling her back around to face him. “Your sister is in constant-need mode, so you can’t count on her. Who do you lean on, Lizzy?”
She told herself she didn’t understand where this was going, even as the anger welled up and nearly choked her. “You really don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“No?”
“No.”
“So you don’t use your fierce independence to sabotage your own happiness at every turn?” he asked. “You like counting on only yourself?” “It’s worked for me, all right?” She hugged herself tight, unhappy that she’d ever opened up to him. “And I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about. We slept together for one night. It was practically an accident.”
He raised a brow. “So you accidentally came three times?”
She struggled for words as she felt the heat flood her face. “We’re only here, together, because I needed a ride.”
“Lame, Lizzy.”
Yeah, it was. And a cheap shot. “Okay, so I needed more than a Jeep, and you’ve been…helpful.”
“Helpful.”
“Indispensable,” she corrected. “But regardless of what comes next, there’s no future between us.”
In the thick silence that fell after that statement, they pulled on the rest of their rain gear and went outside, not touching, not talking.
Third Avenue was nearly unrecognizable, thanks to the raging river flowing down it. The rain pounded the raft and the water around them, making it sound like they were in a rain forest. There were no cars, no people, nothing but Mother Nature still on her tirade.
“You think Cece’s at your place?” Jason finally asked.
“I just don’t know why she hasn’t called.” And that was the rub, the crux, the basis for the knot of worry in Lizzy’s throat. If Cece had gotten out, if she’d gotten somewhere safe, she would have called by now.
Leaving Lizzy unable to help but picture her in labor somewhere, possibly alone, without a cell phone.
God. She could hardly bear the thought, and just as the burning in her throat threatened to overwhelm her, Jason reached out and took her hand.
She met his steadfast regard and felt his fingers gently squeeze hers.
She’d hurt him, on purpose, to make sure he kept his distance—that she kept her distance—and yet he was still here.
For her.
And she had to wonder, if under different circumstances, they could have made this thing work.
13
“THE BABY IS GOING to come.” Cece felt her panic bubble as she looked into Hunter’s eyes, a man she’d known only for one day. “Oh, God.”
“Okay.” He said this utterly calmly. He’d held her hand and stroked her forehead for hours, throughout the entire night and morning. By some miracle, the water hadn’t risen any more around them.
With dawn here, it wouldn’t be long before they were found, but it wasn’t going to happen in time.
“It’s getting light,” he said. “I can walk out—”
“Swim. You mean, you’d have to swim out.”
“Whatever it takes. I can get you help now—”
“No. No, you can’t. Please don’t leave me.”
He stroked her hair from her face. “I’d be right back, I promise. Cece, you might need more help than I can give you—”
“But the baby is coming.”
“I know, which is why I—”
“No, you don’t understand.” She dug her fingers into his jacket and tugged hard, yanking him down her level. “You have to get down there and catch the baby.”
He covered her hands with his, his grip firm and soothing. “Okay. Okay, baby, don’t you worry about my part, my part’s easy.”
“Easy.” She choked out a laugh. “We haven’t even slept together and you’re going to have to—”
“Look, it’s still pretty dark. I won’t be able to see much.”
“Oh, God.” She lay back and stared at the roof of the Hummer. “I can’t believe this is happening. I can’t believe I finally turned my life around, that I finally met a really great guy, and now…this.”
“You don’t have to tell him,” Hunter said quietly. “You don’t have to tell him about me.”
She blinked through the haze of pain and felt another laugh ripple through her. “I meant you, Hunter. You’re the really great guy I finally met.”
“Oh.” He looked at her, then let out a slow smile that changed his usually solemn, quiet face. Transformed it. “I thought I was just one of those assholes.”
“I was wrong. So wrong—Oh, God.” Gasping as the contraction slammed her, she tried desperately to ride the wave of pain, but she was tired of riding. Tired of pain. So damn tired. “Hunter!”
“Right here.”
He was. He was right there. Which was more than she could say for any other man in her life, ever. “I really don’t think I can do this.”
“Sure you can.” He continued to stroke her hair back from her face and smiled into her eyes. “You’re almost there—”
“No, I changed my mind. I don’t want to do this anymore.” She knew she was just babbling, half-delirious, making no sense. “Tomorrow would be better.”
He shook his head with regret. “I don’t think you have that option, Cece.”
“No, seriously—” She broke off on a thin wail as the insidious, all-consuming pain completely took her. It felt like it lasted forever, but finally, when she could breathe again, she closed her eyes and lay
back, panting. “I’m done. Cooked. Finished. I want to go home.”
“Soon,” he promised. “Soon, I’ll take you wherever you want to go.”
“Oh, God. I really have to push. You’re going to have to—”
“I know.” He ran his hand over her leg as he slid down to a better position. “It’s going to be okay, Cece. It’s all going to be okay.”
“How?” she whispered miserably. “It’s never been okay.” She knew she sounded like a child, but at the moment, facing what she was facing, she felt like one. “I’m going to be a mom, Hunter. I’m going to be someone’s mom, and I don’t know how.”
“It’ll come.”
“Are you kidding? I can barely control myself. I mean, I gave up looking for trouble, I did, but sometimes I have the feeling it’s looking for me, you know? And no matter what I do, it’ll find me.” She squeezed her eyes shut.
“I do know. Look at me, Cece.” When she did, she could see it in his eyes, that he really got it. Got her. “You asked for my dirty laundry, and I was flippant. I used to be one of those assholes you gave up. But I’ve changed. So have you. We can do anything now, including this.”
“Trust me, I can’t. In fact, I’m not going to. I’m not.” She shook her head wildly. “I’m just not going to do it.”
“Okay, listen to me.” He was on his knees, between hers, looking fiercely into her face, his hands on her hips as he leaned in. “Turning your life around is more than half the battle, I promise you. Everything that comes after that decision is icing, baby, all icing. As for not knowing how to be a mom, are you kidding me? You have all that life experience. You’ll know exactly what to do. All that’s left is believing in yourself.”
She felt her throat close up a little, blocked by emotion. “I’m not sure I’m that evolved.”
“Fine. Then I’ll believe for you. How’s that? I’ll believe in you enough for the both of us.”
“Why?” she whispered, feeling something well up from within, something that felt alien but not unpleasant.
Hope.
Such painful, delicious hope. “Why would you do that for me?”
He smiled, and it took her heart. “Because everyone deserves a second chance. I got mine, and I want you to have yours. I’ve watched you struggle with the pain for hours now without giving up, Cece. You’ve talked about your sister being a hero, but, Cece, I think it’s you. You’re the hero.”
