by Hutton, CM
But, Rylan said nothing. Instead, he kissed me….hard. I turned my body toward his and he gripped my hips as I ran my fingers through his hair. His tongue searched my entire mouth and I loved that I was sober this time and could remember every part of him. I looked at him and asked, “Is that a yes? You’ll stay?”
He kissed the end of my nose and said, “Yes. I want to stay, but I’m not promising that I’ll watch the movie.” His sexy grin nearly had my clothes spontaneously combusting. I laughed and said, “Fine by me.”
With that, Ryland devoured my mouth again and I wrapped my legs around his and worked to get on top of him. “Jen…” he whispered through our kisses.
“Yeah, Rylan?” He took a deep breath and I could feel him struggling. So, I lifted my face, but left my lips on his, looked into his eyes and said, “Tell me what you need me to know.” The words were soft and breathy as I brushed my lips against his. I couldn’t help but to slightly wiggled my body that was fully on top of his.
“I. Want. You.” Oh, dear God. I pulled back further to look deeper into his eyes.
“Are you sure Rylan?” My words were so broken and freakishly sad.
“Yes, I’m sure…and I’m so sorry, Jen….about before. My reluctance has nothing to do with you….with us. It’s…..my history. I’m just….I’ve been hurt.”
I kissed him and said, “I get that and it’s okay. Just….let’s just enjoy each other, Rylan, because I want you too.” I felt his body relax and I moved against him.
“Jen….” He started.
I put my finger on his lips. “No. Just feel. Don’t think. It’s what we both want, right?” I softly kissed him and he suddenly flipped us over to where he was on top of me.
“Yes. It’s what I want, Jen. And, I can do that…..I can just feel.” Rylan pushed his hips against me and I could feel his erection press into me. He was watching my face as he moved and I smiled and pressed back.
The next time he did it, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I felt Rylan lean down and kiss my neck as he was grinding against me. I wanted to rip his clothes from his body and have my way with him.
“Rylan…..oh God…..hey?” I could barely talk. He was stirring things in me that had my head jumbled.
“Yeah?” He said as he kissed my neck.
I pushed him back to get him to look at me. “You’re really okay? You’re not going to run out on me, are you? Leave me all horny and crazy?” I had to ask.
He laughed and said, “Hell, no! I’m not going anywhere. That okay with you?”
“Yes!” I grabbed his hair in my hands and completely attacked his mouth.
I felt his hand grazed the side of my breast and I arched into him. “Jen…”
I knew he needed a little encouragement, so I grabbed his hand and placed it on my completely aroused breast causing him to suddenly stop kissing me, pull back and look at me. A slow grin moved across his face and mine. His thumb grazed my nipple and I closed my eyes at his touch. That made him start moving his hips against me again. “I need you,” he said in such a soft voice that I almost missed it.
“I know.” My breath was as raspy as his.
He smiled. “Oh yeah?” With that, Rylan pushed harder against me. “Jen….I can’t get you out of my mind.” His voice was so easy and sweet that it made me want to give him anything he wanted.
He stopped moving and looked at my face. I could see that his eyes were glassy. “Rylan? Are you okay?”
“Yeah. I’m good. I just want to look at you….I need to look at you.” A slight smile crept on my face and Ry leaned down to kiss the corner of my mouth. “Can we move off the couch so that I can hold all of you next to me?”
God, this man was so different than I’d ever imagined. He was sweet and sensitive, loving and thoughtful…..who was Rylan Daniels?!? And why the hell did he put on such aires?
I smiled and tried to stand, but his body was covering mine and I was trapped. “Going somewhere?” He asked.
“Yeah, to my room, but you are blocking my way. Want to help me out?” Rylan smiled and stood up.
With a very timid voice, he said, “Can I come with you?”
I stood and wrapped my arms around him. “That was my plan.” I didn’t get anything else out. Rylan scooped me up and started to devour my mouth as we moved to my room.
He stood at the edge of my bed as we kissed for several long seconds then he moved to lay us on my bed, placing his body on top of mine.
I cupped his face and just looked into his tormented eyes. “Ry, what’s wrong?”
He bent his head into the crook of my neck and said, “You haven’t called me ‘Ry’ all night. Why?”
“Because it seemed to cause you pain, babe.” Shit! I didn’t mean to call him that but I couldn’t take it back and the regret covered me as I felt his whole body stiffened and the walls go up, blocking me out.
“Hey, are you okay?” I was gently touching his face.
Rylan closed his eyes for several seconds. I just laid there frozen, except for my hands that had moved into his hair. When he opened his eyes, they were glassy and full of angst. “Rylan, talk to me.”
He took a deep breath and said, “I’m sorry. It’s just been a while….since I’ve heard anyone call me ‘babe’ and even longer since I’ve felt…well, just felt, that’s all.” He leaned down and kissed my nose with a small smile on his beautiful face.
I was relieved and concerned all at the same time. I was glad he wasn’t leaving, but worried about what had him so closed off. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” My voice was almost a whisper.
“No. You didn’t. It just brought up old feelings,” he paused, “nice feelings, Jen.” He kissed me so softly and I felt myself falling even further for this complicated man.
Our kiss intensified and Rylan’s hands started to roam over my fully clothed body. He slid his hand down my side, grazing the edge of my breast and pressing his hips to mine so that I could feel his erection. Happy thoughts danced around my head thinking of the effect I had on Rylan Daniels; a man that I had not so long ago thought was a cold-hearted asshole.
He moved again and the fire in me started raging with want.
Between our deep kisses and his slow grinding movement against me, I said, “When was the last time you were buried deep inside someone and just let yourself feel….just let go?”
He breathed deep and said, “Years.”
“Well, it’s time to dust that off and let me hold you, with every part of me. I want you to feel, Rylan…feel me around you, holding you, loving you just where you are.”
Rylan’s slow smile said it all and it was unfathomable how fast we took off our clothes. Rylan sat up and took off his shirt, just as I did and before I could even begin to think about anything, we were both naked, lying next to each other on my bed.
He combed his hands through my hair and stared at my face. “You are so beautiful, Jen. I need you….so much.” His brows were furrowed and full of concern.
“Ry….oh, God.” I blinked slowly and waited a breath until he leaned down and kissed me like his life depended on every response I gave.
“I need you….just you.” His words were so raw and full of emotion. I didn’t understand them, didn’t even know if I wanted to understand them. All I knew was that I was willing to give Rylan just what he asked for…me… and a piece of my heart.
“I’m here, Ry….for you. Let me do this for you.” I wrapped my hands around his neck and pulled him to me. I lifted my hips to his and felt his erection against me. Rylan moved to align his cock with my entrance, but paused for a second like he was nervous or worried. “Jen, I don’t have anything with me.”
“It’s okay, babe. I’m on the pill and for some stupid reason, I trust you. Can I trust you?”
“Yes. It’s been a really long time, like years.” His face was buried in my shoulder. I couldn’t even comprehend what would cause ‘years’ to go by without this man getting laid.
&nb
sp; I pulled his hair to get him to lift his face and look at me. What I saw was worry that didn’t belong on such a beautiful man. I stroked the back of my hand down his cheek and said, “Rylan, I trust you.”
He stared into my eyes for a few seconds, then without looking away, he watched my face as he pushed into me, causing a little gasp to escape my lips as he entered my body.
“You okay?” Rylan said as he leaned in to kiss me.
“Yeah, just a little unexpected.” I grinned against his mouth and he let out a little laugh then closed his eyes and pushed in all the way.
“Oh my God, you feel so good.” His voice was gruff and full of heat.
“Ry…..” I kissed his neck and he quickly found my mouth. His tongue frantically searched mine as his hips pushed deeper into me. I was so completely lost in this man.
We moved together like we were made for each other and I felt my climax building. I gripped my hands into his hair and shoved my tongue further into his glorious mouth.
Rylan slowed down our kiss and his movements as he gently slid in and out of me. I could feel him working to restrain himself, but his pace only made my arousal grow. “Oh, God…Ry…”
“I know…” He leaned back a tiny bit to look into my eyes. Then, he rested his forehead on mine, took a breath, closed his eyes and whispered, “You have no idea what this is for me….what this is doing to me.”
“I think I might have an idea.” I kissed his lips and Rylan opened his eyes as he thrust into me making me gasp. I exploded around him and felt him harden even more just before his release into me.
Chapter 14 – Rylan
Dear God she felt so good. I didn’t want to move…ever. I smiled against her neck and kissed her behind her ear causing her to let out a little moan.
“Jen?”
“Hmm?”
“Thank you. You’re just what I’ve needed.” I didn’t know how to say what I was feeling and apparently she didn’t know what I was trying to say because Jen turned her head toward me and looked at me with furrowed, questioning brows.
“What I mean is, you make me want to feel again. I know that may not make much sense to you, but you make me want to be alive.” She relaxed her face and smiled.
“I think I can understand that. I’m sort of feeling the same thing, Ry.” She kissed my nose and I smiled. I wanted so badly to tell her about me…about Kristen, but I wasn’t ready.
“Ry?”
“Yeah?”
“I really love that you’re not the total douchebag prick I thought you were when we first met.” I tilted my head and she started laughing….like snorting laughing and I couldn’t help but to join her. She was so beautiful, especially when she was laughing.
“Yeah, me too, babe.” I froze for just a second at my own word….the word I hadn’t uttered in five years and I hoped Jen didn’t pick up on it, but I saw her face and knew she’d caught me.
She placed one hand on my cheek and said, “It’s okay. I have a feeling that word is something that might need dusting off too.” She had the most beautiful little smile on her lips.
“Thank you,” I whispered as I leaned into her hand.
“You’re welcome.” I leaned down and kissed her. I was still buried in her warm folds so when her tongue slipped out and softly licked across my lips, by cock twitched inside her making her smile.
“Yeah, someone else thanks you too and is very happy where he is.” She laughed, but it wasn’t like before. It was muted by the lust and want I saw in her eyes.
She moved her hips just a little and I groaned. “Shit…you do crazy things to me, Jen.”
“Same here, Ry.” Jen ran her hands through my hair and gripped the back of my head, pulling me closer to her. With her eyes shut and our faces so close our noses were touching, she said, “You feel amazing to me. I could really get used to this, babe, and that scares the hell out of me.”
“Why?” I knew why and I wanted to hear her say it, but by the look in her eyes and the feel of her hips moving against me, she didn’t want to talk at the moment and I was finding it rather difficult myself.
I grabbed her face in my hands and sucked her bottom lip into my mouth. She slid her hands down my back and scratched her nails along my spine. It was sexy as hell and my cock grew even bigger, stretching her. She took a deep breath and moved to get out from under me. “My turn, baby.” She smiled and I let her flip us over with her riding on top of me.
She sat up, knees bent, completely impelled by me, forcing my cock to be as deep as it could be inside her. She grinned and moved a bit, feeling me and let out a slight wince and moan. Her little sexy move nearly caused me to have a ‘preemie.’
“Shit!” I closed my eyes as I let the word slip out.
“You okay there, babe?” Jen grinned, eyebrows raised, and moved again, but this time she was caressing her breasts when I opened my eyes to look at her.
“Oh dear God, Jen! You can’t do that! I won’t last, babe. Shit!”
“Do what, Ry? This?” She moved her hips again. “Or this?” She moaned and continued to rub her breasts and play with her nipples. She leaned her head back as the pleasure of her own touch and my throbbing cock aroused her.
“Jen….” I quickly sat up and covered her hands with mine and rubbed her breasts while I kissed down her neck. She wrapped her legs around my waist and started pumping herself on me.
She moved her hands around my neck and let me take control of massaging her breasts. I leaned down and closed my mouth over one of the taut nipples and sucked. “Oh, God, Ry.” Yeah, turnabout and all that!
“Feel good?” I kept going.
“Yes!” Yes, it did….all of it felt good, great actually.
I suddenly flipped us, with Jen’s legs still wrapped around me and while on my knees I started pounding into her. “Hang on tight, baby. This isn’t going to be gentle, but I need to do this….to have you like this and make you mine.”
“Ry…” She gripped me with her legs and dug her nails into my back as I slammed into her over and over until we both exploded, screaming each other’s names.
Jen pulsed around me for several minutes as we came back to earth. “Amazing,” she said with a low, sleepy voice.
“Sorry if I was rough. Watching you touch yourself brought out the fucking animal in me, Jen. I needed it to be me making you feel like that.” Wow, just throw your shit out there, Rylan. Way to go.
Jen was rubbing her hands up and down my back. “Oh yeah? I’ll have to remember that ‘cause I sure did like how you handled your ‘need’ there, baby.”
I laughed and moved to slip out of her. “Hey, where are you going?” She asked.
“I’m taking you to the shower and then, if you’ll let me, I’m going to sleep naked right beside you tonight. Is that okay?”
Jen smiled and said, “I think I could fit that in my schedule this evening.”
I jumped up, grabbed Jen’s arm and pulled her with me. We climbed in the shower and gently washed each other. I tried not to linger too long on her best parts, but couldn’t help it when I washed her breasts and she leaned her head back, closed her eyes and moaned. She was causing all kinds of wonderful things to happen to my body and a shitload more to my mind and heart.
I pressed myself against her body and placed my lips right under her ear and said, “You can’t make those noises. You will undo all the washing I’ve done.”
She laughed, but didn’t move. She just kissed me, eyes wide open looking at me as she did. “Hmm, like you didn’t know what you were doing to me? Don’t play innocent, Daniels! I know your game.”
I just smiled and wrapped my arms around her tighter. “Yeah, okay. I can’t help it. You are an incredibly beautiful woman, Jen and you’ve awakened something in me that has missed out on life for a while now.”
She kissed me again and said, “Thank you,” but it didn’t reach her eyes. She was holding back, thinking about my words. I wasn’t judging….God knew I had no place to judge her
holding something back.
We stared at each other for several long seconds before Jen said, “I’m ready to lay in bed…naked with you. Come on. Let’s get out.”
I was totally good with that and moved to grab towels for the two of us. We dried off, brush our teeth….Jen let me borrow her toothbrush….and climbed back into her bed completely naked, face to face with arms and legs wrapped around each other.
“Ry?”
“Yeah?”
“Tell me.” Oh shit! I couldn’t, not yet.
“Tell you what?”
“Tell me what happened to you. What caused you to shut down and avoid life?” She really wanted to know, but telling her caused too many emotions and confusing feelings. I didn’t want to ruin this time we’d had together.
“Jen, I would rather not talk about it now. I’ve had an amazing time tonight and don’t want anything to taint it with anything.”
“Okay.” She was really quiet and rolled to face away from me. I held on tight to her as she pressed her back to my front. She didn’t say anything else. Before long, I could feel her breath even out as she fell asleep with my arms wrapped around her.
I felt like crap. She asked, knowing there was some serious history with me and I chickened out and didn’t tell her. I wasn’t sure what was going to happen, but I felt like right at that moment, I missed out on an opportunity to create something incredible with Jen and I hated myself for it.
Chapter 15 – Jen
I woke up in a panic. I’d had a dream again and my body was on high alert. I only had them when I was stressed or overwhelmed. I guess you could say spending the night with Rylan fit both those categories. He was still asleep and had his arms wrapped around me like I might flee in the night.
I thought about our night and the conversation I had tried to start before falling asleep. I knew his baggage was really deep. He’d obviously been hurt by someone or something. I wanted him to talk to me about it so that I’d know what I was getting into with Rylan, but he shut me out and I wasn’t going to push. I understood, even though it bothered me.
