by Maisey Yates
He stalked off in the direction Karen had gone. Normally, Karen was the one who would ensure his bill was paid and that the food went where he needed it to go. But Karen had cast off her good sense, and not in the way he’d wanted, so someone else would have to do it.
He dialed his driver, established that Karen had not gotten back in his limo, gave the man a few terse instructions regarding the food before stopping at the head of a trail that led down to the beach.
That was where she’d gone, he was sure of it. Because he knew her. Knew that after taking off as she’d done, she was hardly going to make use of his car, unless it was to strand him, which he likely deserved. And he also knew she liked the beach, that she found it soothing. She’d had to make do with lakes in Komenia, as it was landlocked. She often spoke of how she’d gone to the beach back in her hometown in California.
He wondered if she missed it. For some reason, he cared.
Karen had that effect on him.
He cursed her and her effect the whole way down the path to the water. He cursed her until he saw her standing there, a ring of silver moonlight outlining her form, her arms crossed, her shoulders tucked inward, her back to him.
“Am I so repellent that you had to run out on a nice dinner to avoid my touch?”
She whirled around, red hair cascading over her shoulders, shimmering in the dim light. “How can you ask me that? How dare you make it seem like I’ve done something wrong when you
You can’t just do that!”
“I can’t do what?”
“Touch me. Touch me like you have a right to. I’m your PA. You’re my boss. You’re a prince. An engaged prince who has no right to touch anyone other than his fiancée, but especially not me, considering the position I’m in.”
“I have been doing my very best not to touch you for the past four years. Give me a break this once, Karen. My control has its limits.”
“Your control?” she shouted, her words echoing off the rocks around them. “Your control? I have sat at my desk for four years, with nothing but a solid wood door between you and me, wanting nothing more than to burst into your office and demand that you do something about this
this thing between us. This desire that’s eating me alive. I’ve had to live with the fact that you’ve never looked at me as anything more than a day planner in stilettos. I have had to help you plan the details of your arranged, convenient marriage to another woman and not let you see how much I want you. And then, at your convenience, you want to seduce me? I don’t think so, Bastian. It’s not fair. I can’t do it.”
“You thought
” He took a sharp breath. “You thought it was one-sided?”
“You’ve never once looked at me
that way. You’ve had a veritable all-you-can-eat buffet of models since I came to work for you, and you have never given me a second glance or hinted at an attraction.”
“Because I knew I couldn’t do anything about it,” he said, his voice a growl, his control frayed around the edges. “I have wanted you from the moment I first saw you. Wanted to strip your very appropriate blouse from your body, push your skirt up around your thighs and have my way with you. That day, and every day since. But I never did. Because I knew that there was only one way it would end.”
“What changed, then?” she asked, her voice trembling. The tremor in her words branded him with guilt.
“Nothing,” he said. “Nothing except that I realized tonight I would never have a chance with you. I think a part of me never truly believed it. I’d always thought that someday
someday I would taste your lips. Someday I would hold your body against mine, skin to skin.” His throat tightened, desire a roaring beast, tearing through him. Destructive. Savage. Painful. He took a step toward her, put his hand on her cheek. Her skin was so soft beneath his hand. So perfect. “Tonight I realized I was running out of somedays. I can’t live without knowing what it’s like to be with you, Karen. I didn’t intend to try and seduce you. I just wanted dinner. A moment when you weren’t with me simply because you were my efficient PA. But that’s not enough. I want more.”
“I do, too,” she said, her words a broken whisper. “But it’s still stupid, Bastian, for the same reasons it’s always been stupid. It could never be more than sex.”
“The sex might be worth it.”
“I’m not the kind of girl who does casual sex.”
Casual sex implied nothing more than bodies. Nothing more than a physical need. He’d had his share of casual sex. It hadn’t felt like this. Like there was a weight in his chest threatening to crush him, making it difficult to breathe. “It could never be casual between us,” he said.
She shook her head. “I don’t imagine it could be.”
“At least give me one thing,” he said.
“What?”
“Kiss me.”
He could see the indecision on her face, then the moment she made up her mind. Her eyes fluttered closed and she tilted her face up to him.
And his world stopped turning. He forgot about everything. Duty, honor and trade alliances. The beautiful Princess Evangelina, the woman he had just promised to marry.
He forgot about it all, because he was filled with his desirehis needfor Karen.
He cupped her face, her skin smooth, exquisite beneath his fingertips. He wanted to savor the moment, draw it out. But he was afraid that if he didn’t seize it, she would come to her senses. And that he might come to his.
He leaned in and and pressed his lips to hers.
Chapter Four
It had been a long time since Karen had been kissed. Still, even though memory might prove faulty, she was sure it had never been this good.
His lips were hot, firm, demanding and giving all at once. She opened to him, his tongue sliding against hers, the friction slick and wonderful. Utter perfection.
He wrapped his arms around her waist, drew her in tightly to the heat of his body. She wanted to stay just like this forever. And at the same time, she desperately needed more.
She put her hands flat on his chest, felt his heart pounding beneath her palm, felt his hard muscles beneath his shirt and jacket. She needed there to be less between them. She needed there to be nothing between them.
Not clothes. Not a title. Not a fiancée.
But that was fantasy. And she couldn’t take a fantasy that far.
“Stop,” she said, pulling away from him, leaving a piece of herself behind.
“Why?” he asked, his hand stroking her cheek, brushing her hair back from her face.
“Stop, I can’t do this.”
He pressed his forehead to hers, his hands shaking, tracing a path over her cheekbones. “Can you stop? I’m not sure I can.”
“Please, Bastian,” she said.
“Would it be so horrible?”
No. It would be perfect. Painfully so. The kind of perfect that made everything else in life seem a little bit duller, a little less filled with color. The kind of perfect she’d only experienced in dreams.
“What happened after would be.”
“What are you imagining?”
“The goodbye. The looking at your fiancée and knowing
knowing what we had done.”
“If I can manage the guilt, surely you can.”
“Why is this so easy for you?”
“You think this is easy? It’s not easy. But turning away from you is harder. Living with the guilt, the memories, would be easier than living my whole life wondering.”
“Do you really think so?”
“I don’t know. That’s the thing, Karen. It’s the not knowing that might kill me.”
“What if the knowing kills us?”
“We could find out,” he said, dark eyes intense.
She pulled away. “Why now?”
“I’ve always wanted you. But there was nothing I could do about it, not really, not when I knew an arranged marriage to a royal was in my future. There’s still nothing I can
do. It will be a mistake for us to be together, and I don’t care. I want it anyway.”
It was the raw quality in his voice that shook her. She’d heard Bastian in business mode, smooth and confident. She’d heard him when he was mounting a seduction, talking into his cell phone, one of his models on the other end, his voice husky, sensual and sure. But there was none of that here. This was different. And it made her feel different. Damn the man.
It wasn’t fair. She’d been responsible all of her life. She’d had one sensible, nice boyfriend. And he’d been great, but she’d been young and not ready to settle down, so she’d done the good, autonomous thing, made her parents proud by leaving that relationship and taking a good job opportunity instead. And since then she’d done nothing to compromise that. Until now.
“This isn’t fair, Bastian,” she said. “Every day I’ve come into work for you has been like having a carrot dangled in front of my face. One that was just out of my reach. One I couldn’t touch. And now that you’re extra-special off-limits to me, now that you’re marrying someone else, you hand me the carrot. And all of that sounded much more euphemistic than intended.”
“I don’t know if it’s okay to laugh.”
“Go ahead,” she said, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips, even while tears stung her eyes.
He did laugh. But it was a conflicted sound. One that seemed to mirror what she was feeling. “One night, Karen. And then at least we’ll have the answer.”
Karen wondered what would be worse. Never knowing, or knowing for sure. Abstaining certainly hadn’t erased her desire for him. Not even close.
Maybe indulgence was the way to go.
“I think you’re right,” she said. “I think we should.”
“You do?”
“No. I actually think it’s a bad idea. I’m lying to myself and telling myself it’s a good idea because it means we get to have sex, and I’m highly susceptible to any scenario in which we get to have sex, so
so there’s that.”
“So you don’t want to?”
“No, I do want to. We shouldn’t, and it’s a bad idea. But we’re going to.”
“You’re confusing.”
“All of this is confusing,” she said. “I’m not the kind of woman who agrees to one night of sex. I’m not the kind of woman who sleeps with a man when he’s engaged. I
I’ve only been with one man, and it’s been four years since I’ve had so much as a kiss. So why I would want to abandon everything I’ve ever believed in for one night of pleasure is sort of a mystery to me. But the thing that doesn’t confuse me is that I do want you. There’s no question.”
“That’s about the only thing I’m certain of, too,” he said. “That I want you. More than any other woman, ever.”
He leaned in again, his lips claiming hers in a passionate, hungry kiss that burned her down to the soles of her shoes. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pressed her breasts to his chest, pleasure coursing through her, sending streaks of heat along her veins that ignited in her stomach, a burning flame that threatened to consume her.
She curled her fingers around the lapels of his jacket, holding him to her. For tonight, he could be hers. For a few short hours, she could have him as she’d wanted him for so long. Naked. Nothing off-limits. For tonight, she would be able to touch him, kiss him, anywhere she wanted, however long she wanted, whenever she wanted.
And she intended to make the most of it. She could do nothing else. From the moment he’d asked her to be his last first date, she’d been lost.
No, that was wrong. She’d been lost from the moment she’d first stepped into his office. Utterly and completely lost. And if this was her one chance to have him, she would seize it with both hands and accept the pain and punishment for her sins later.
“You know,” she said, “I never do this.”
“Never do what?”
“I never sleep with men on the first date. I never even kiss men on the first date.”
He looked confused for a moment. “First date?”
“Yes. I’m your last first date, remember? That means you’re being incredibly forward with me.”
“I only asked you on a date because I was trying to avoid demanding that you come to bed with me, and I knew if I wasn’t careful that’s what I would say.”
“Oh. Well, that would have been forward, too. And inappropriate. You’re my boss.”
“I’m well aware of all the reasons why this is inappropriate. I also know that I’m not just your date. Or your boss. I know you, Karen. I know the look you get in your eyes when you’re satisfied with a joke you just told. I know that when you bite your bottom lip and avert your eyes you’re trying to keep from showing me how annoyed you are with me. I know that you check me out when you think I’m not looking. I know that you’re the person I look forward to seeing the most every day. So you see, I’m not just your boss. Or your date. Or your friend.” He swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down. “I’m more than that.”
She nodded, the lump in her throat blocking her words.
“I’m more than that,” he said again. “Tonight I’m going to be your lover.”
Chapter Five
Tonight I’m going to be your lover.
Bastian’s words echoed through her, reverberated along every fiber of Karen’s body as they drove back toward the Kynosian palace.
Was she really going to do this? Sleep with him? In his fiancée’s home?
Karen bit her lip and looked out the window, watched the trees and the ocean pass by, dark, indistinct shapes at this hour, with a streak of silver provided by the moon.
She was a terrible person. Because she was doing this. And if she thought of Evangelina as the enemy, as the woman who was stealing away the man she loved, then she almost felt justified. The princess would have him forever, after all, and Eva didn’t love Bastian any more than he loved her. All Karen wanted was one night. One night to get her through the rest of her life. To keep her warm in her empty bed. That didn’t seem so extraordinarily selfish.
The limo pulled into the massive gates of the castle and started slowly up the road around the immense cobblestone drive that passed by the front entrance.
“People can’t see us coming in together,” she said, panic weaving its way through her words, tightening her throat.
“Karen, we’re always together, people won’t think anything of it.” He put his hands over hers, and if she hadn’t felt the slight tremor in them, she would assume he was entirely unaffected. But he was shaking, too. That made her feel oddly comforted.
“Somehow it seems different now.”
“It is,” he said. “But until we get upstairs, behind closed doors, it isn’t. So I want you to let me open your door for you, and I want you to follow me inside. Take out your phone and pretend you’re scheduling something. Then when we’re in my quarters, I’m going to close the door. When I do that, I want you to kiss me.”
She nodded, words deserting her entirely.
“All right. Let’s go.” He climbed out of the limo and rounded to her side of the car, opening the door for her. She got out and tried to keep her distance. Difficult to do when everything in her wanted to melt against him. “Come with me.”
She moved into position, at his right side, trailing just slightly, her phone clasped tightly in unsteady hands. She unlocked the screen and started typing something, like she was making an entry into his calendar. He was saying things, too, giving orders as he often did. And she kept her eyes glued to the screen, typing as she walked, hearing nothing of what he said. She wondered if he was conscious of what he was saying.
Their footsteps echoed in the vacant halls. It had to be two in the morning by now. Still, in a palace the size of this one there was always someone around, always some staff member ensuring things were running as they should. The staff in Kyonos was loyal to the Drakos family, and that meant they were loyal to Evangelina, not Bastian. Discretion was essential.
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Not for the first time, she felt like a jerk.
Not enough to turn back. Not enough to stop. Not now, not when he was within her reach.
They finally reached Bastian’s quarters and he opened the door, letting her go inside first. He closed the door behind them, the sound loud in the empty room.
He stood by the door, the dim light casting shadows across his face, his dark gaze intense, fathomless.
She wanted to make a joke. Do something to decrease the tension between them. But it might break the spell. Jokes had long been her defense against Bastian and her attraction to him. She suspected they’d served the same function for him.
And now there was no room for that. No time.
She closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around his neck. She was surprised by her lack of hesitation. But in that moment, she didn’t feel nervous. She felt sure. She was taking what was hers. What had been hers from the moment she’d first seen him. The connection between them had been so strong, so real from the first. And he’d felt it, too. Surely that gave her some sort of claim on him.
No, she wasn’t royal. Her birth prevented her from being the woman for him in a legal sense. But her soul didn’t care that Bastian was a prince and she was just a girl from a beach town in Northern California. Her soul recognized him as a piece of her, and tonight, she was going to know what it was like to put all the pieces of herself together.
The realization was frightening. Exhilarating.
And so was his kiss.
She pressed her lips to his, claimed him, poured all of the desire and hunger she felt for him into the kiss. A rough sound rumbled in his chest and he reversed their position, pressed her back against the door.
She arched into him, running her hands over his back, tracing the hard muscle tone beneath her fingertips and pushing everything else from her mind. All that mattered was what it felt like to be with him. To touch him. To kiss him. Nothing else mattered. Not the future, not the past, not titles.
