by Sara Ella
In.
The.
Snow.
How many times have I imagined this moment?
“Eliyana Olivia Ember . . .”
There’s always a choice.
Ky?
“. . . I’ve loved you since before I can remember.” His lips brush my hand, sending an explosion of goose bumps up my arm.
You can still choose me.
I—
Joshua raises his eyebrows. “Think of what we can do. Together. As king and queen of the Second, we’ll bring this Reflection into a new era. El, will you be my bride?” He withdraws something sparkly from his pocket.
My breath ceases. It’s my necklace, the one with the treble clef and heart charm. And there, beside the charm, hangs a new addition—a white-gold band studded with diamonds.
“Where did you find it?”
“At the bottom of Lynbrook Province Threshold.” He fastens it to my neck with care, leaning in so close his nose grazes my ear as he pulls away.
My heart beats yes, yes, yes as I stare at the treasure resting between my coat lapels. But there’s another answer too. Softer. Not as distinct. The one belonging to the rose button necklace hidden beneath my clothes. The one I’m not quite ready to let go.
“I don’t want an answer now,” Joshua says, helping me breathe. His thumb caresses my cheek. “I know it’s a lot to consider, especially after all that’s happened.” He gathers my hands in his. “But El, I would wait a thousand lifetimes for only one with you.”
Of course he would. I know he would. “Thank you.”
Snow falls, dusts our faces. He draws me in and kisses me on the forehead. Light. Tender. “Come on.” He intertwines our fingers. “Let’s go home.”
I nod and we walk up the hill side by side. Our conversation is easy, and for a moment I forget everything we’ve faced. The past strips away, wiping the slate as clean as the snow covering this beautiful Reflection. This is an ending, but it’s a beginning too. For us. For me.
I glance over my shoulder once. Just once. Saying a silent goodbye to the boy who chose me as I chose him. He gave me a chance. I won’t let his sacrifice be in vain.
Thank you, Ky.
I face the castle again, my real-life fairy tale. I never thought I’d be the girl someone wanted—the girl Joshua wanted.
But even if he didn’t, I think I’d be okay. Because my worth isn’t defined by others. My mirrormark is invisible to Joshua. The rebels saw me as the girl to lead them to their savior. To Mom I was the sole person she had to protect. And Ky . . . he’s saved me time and time again.
So many people willing to risk everything for my sake. I mean something different to each of them. But it doesn’t matter. All that matters is what I mean to me.
As Joshua holds open the massive door leading inside the castle, I catch my reflection in the window and my mouth forms an O. My brown-purple hair is pulled off my face, revealing my mirrormark in its entirety—a mirrormark that shouldn’t be there according to Ember’s theory. Once the Verity took on a new vessel—me—my Mirror Calling should have vanished. I hadn’t even thought about it until now. Somehow I don’t mind it’s still there. It’s an odd feeling, seeing the mark I’ve always loathed as something else altogether. My strength. My song.
But the present mirrormark isn’t what startles me most. There’s something else, too, unfamiliar and new and maybe even beautiful. In all the times I’ve looked in the mirror, this image is one I’ve never seen.
The girl in my reflection is smiling.
CODA
Ky
Yesterday
This isn’t over.
I clutch the envelope, its corners poking through my gloves and into my skin. Packed snow covers the ground, spreading across the ice-encrusted Threshold before me.
Crunch, crunch, crunch.
I heft the pack on my shoulder higher as he approaches.
When he halts at my side, we don’t look at each other. I allow him to speak first. He is, after all, the king.
For now.
“It’s better this way,” Joshua says.
“For her? Or for you?”
He doesn’t answer, shifts, passes me something.
“What’s this?” I open the weighty leather pouch. A wad of green paper, Third Reflection currency, taunts me. “A bribe? Do you really believe a wad of cash is going to keep me away from her?”
“Not a bribe, no.” He turns toward me. “Just something to get you started.”
“I’ve lived in the Third before. I know how to survive.” A dark laugh crosses my lips. I avoid eye contact, study the dead landscape.
“You spoke to Ebony about your sister’s whereabouts?”
I nod. “Khloe’s with Countess Ambrose in the Fourth. I’m headed there as soon as I can reach the Threshold.”
“I’ve already arranged passage. A ship will be waiting.”
Silence stretches. “She’ll figure it out eventually,” I say. “Ember isn’t stupid.”
“Eliyana,” he says as if making a point, “is marrying me. You’re going to have to accept that. I’ve been in her life for years. You, on the other hand, only have claim to mere days.”
I face him, shoving his payoff into my coat pocket. I leave my fist submerged—otherwise I just might punch him between his royal-blue eyes. “What lie will you feed her? When she asks about me?”
“If she asks about you, I’ll tell her the truth.” His gaze narrows. “You left to find your sister.”
So that’s how he wants to play this. Fine. “I want to see it before I go.”
“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.”
Typical. I clench my teeth. Then I shove up my right sleeve, revealing the blackened veins along my arm. Except, unlike before, they’re darker. And cold. But also hot. Burning.
I can’t decide which pain is worse. The never-subsiding sensation that my arm is being sliced open. Or the emptiness. The constant craving for . . . something.
Once he’s had a good look, he clears his throat. Rolls up the sleeve covering his right arm. His veins are identical to mine. “Happy now?”
“How long do you think you can hide it?”
He rolls his sleeve back down. “As long as it takes. There isn’t room for both of us in her life, Kyaphus.”
“It doesn’t matter what distance you put between us. She and I are bound, heart and soul. My taking on part of the Void only makes our bond stronger.”
“That may be. But the longer you’re away, the more she’ll forget. Her connection to you will become nothing more than an annoyance. An old scar she’ll ignore given time. And you . . . you will go on without her. If it’s any consolation, your feelings for her will keep the Void inside at bay. As long as you love her, the Void will not spread past your arm. Remember that.” It’s quiet for a beat. Our breaths fog the air. Then he adds, “I would like to know one thing.”
I shrug my shoulders to my ears. Shiver.
“Why didn’t you tell her? If you’re so sure of her feelings for you, why not use the truth to your advantage?”
Because she’s not a toy. Because I have no interest in manipulating her for my gain. Before I can decide against it, I shove the envelope into his hand. “Give this to her for me, okay? You owe me that much.”
“I owe you nothing.” His lips tighten, but he nods. “However, I’ll do as you ask. Just don’t expect it to change anything.”
I shove my free hand into my empty pocket. Then I turn and trudge onto the frozen lake, toward the hole in the middle, the one that will lead me through frigid water to her former Reflection. My former Reflection. Chills dig at my spine like daggers, the snow growing deeper the farther I walk.
When I reach the opening, I glance at the shore. David is gone, already having backtracked the foot-printed path toward the castle. Toward her.
I clench my teeth, readying for the sudden burst of pain the subzero water will cause. Before taking the leap, I search the sky for her wi
ndow. I don’t care what David says. He may have known her longer, but I know her better. Once I find Khloe, I won’t even need to return. Em will seek answers eventually. When she does, I’ll be waiting.
Pulling in a long breath, I step off the edge.
It’s only a matter of time before she follows.
Acknowledgments—a.k.a. Cool Nerds in My Universe
Fun fact: I always, without fail, read this section of a book first. Well, now it’s my turn (finally) to thank the people who got me here.
YHWH, my King. My Creator. My Abba Father. Thank you for giving me this gift called writing.
Mom, I miss you every day. Thanks for instilling in me a passion for reading and for always urging me to write things down. You inspired Elizabeth. She is you.
Daddy, you never let me settle for less than an A in English. I totally get it now.
Aunt Terri, you are the other version of myself. Thank you for believing in me.
To my sibs: Karine, Tim, and April, thanks for all the awesome, and sometimes crazy, times. I love you, dudes. Seriously.
To my husband Joe: you’ve always supported me in whatever crazy dream I had. Thank you for being patient until I found a dream that stuck. I love you.
N and M, you are my sunshines. Thank you for understanding when Mommie is on the computer (sometimes longer than I said I would be). I love you both oh so much!
To the rest of my family, the Larsons, Springer cousins, Pop, and Aunt Cook, I love each and every one of you. You have no idea how much your support means to me.
Carolyn, thank you for letting me read the early chapters of this book aloud to you as we drove to Phoenix. I love you.
Christen and Neysa (a.k.a. WriteNight Girls), I didn’t really get serious about this story until you two showed up. I love you awesome nerds.
ACFW, you paved the yellow brick road to my very own Oz. Now every time I attend the annual conference I think, “There’s no place like home.”
Thanks to Tina Russo Radcliffe for telling me “story begins when change happens.” And to Christina Rich for explaining what weasel words are.
Nancy Kimball (a.k.a. Obi-Wan), you’re more than a mentor, you’re a sister and friend. Thanks for taking a chance on this “inkling in training.”
Deirdre Lockhart (a.k.a. Editor the First), thank you for helping shape this story (and this author).
Janalyn, your friendship means the world. You inspire me each day just by being you.
To my agent, Jim Hart, thanks for taking a chance on me. I owe you more than I can say.
Becky Dean, you may not have worked on this story with me in its early stages, but your help since we joined forces warrants a huge “Thanks!”
To my publishing family at Thomas Nelson/HarperCollins, thank you for whatever you saw in me. This is me sending a huge hug to each and every one of you! Becky Monds, thank you for encouraging me, brainstorming with me, and helping me fill in all the holes. Jodi Hughes, you inspire me to try to live up to all the epicness of OUAT. Daisy Hutton, Becky Philpott, and Kristen Golden, thank you all for everything you have done for me. I can’t wait to get to know you all better. Amanda Bostic, you were the first to welcome me once I received my contract. Thank you for that and all you do behind the scenes. Samantha Buck, your ideas make marketing fun. I can’t wait to see what you cook up next! Julee Schwarzburg, thank you for your amazing attention to detail and for asking all the right questions. Paul Fisher, thanks for your enthusiasm and super exciting ideas! Kristen Vasgaard, I cried when I saw the cover design. It’s perfect and fairy tale–ish and so very me. Matt Covington, thank you for bringing the Second Reflection to life with your awesome map. I also want to thank Katie Bond who is no longer with the team. I will be forever grateful for the time I got to spend with you.
To my personal cheerleaders: Ingrid, Cassia, Zara, Kelly P., Janelle, Brooke, Ann, Nick, Denise, and the many others who have cheered me on via social media. I can’t thank you enough for your encouragement and support.
Mandi, Abby, and Hope, thank you for the sunshine you bring to all my cloudy days.
To my beta readers, Gabrial, Laura, and Karine, your feedback and all-out fangirling have encouraged me to the moon.
Thanks to my FB buds, Flic and Anson, who helped when I was stuck. And to Mitz, thanks for those NYC descriptions you wrote. Also to Steve (a.k.a. the Lawn Gnome): Thanks for answering my NYC questions in the final stages of revisions.
To my BookTube friends: Thank you, (insert your name here). There are quite literally enough of you to fill a separate section of acknowledgments. You know who you are. *waves*
Trina Ruck, thank you for your enthusiasm for this project. Your creativity inspires me.
To my Street Team/Early Reviewers: ABasketCaseyReads, April Sarah, Bekah AwesomeBookNut, Between Chapters, books & tea & all things me, Bre Faucheux, Coffee&Chapters, Danni Darling, gingerreadslainey, Hope Ortego, ISmellBooks, thejordanjournals, Kayla Rayne, KalesKorner, The Little Librarian, Meagan Precourt, and taylortalksbooks, saidthestory . . . Thank you all for your willingness to read my book baby and tell the world what you think . . . whatever that may be.
Thanks to Jade @bedtimebkworm for telling me about the Combine feature in Word.
Emilie Hendryx (a.k.a. E.A. Creative Photography), thank you for the lovely headshots!
To my author friends, thank you for letting me pester you, among other things: Krista McGee, Lorie Langdon, Mary Weber, Kristy Cambron, Sarah E. Morin, Diana Sharples, Elizabeth VanTassel, Shannon Dittemore, Melissa Landers, Nadine Brandes, Katherine Reay, Elissa Sussman, Patricia Beal, Emileigh Latham, Rachelle Rea, Laura McNeill, Sara Crawford, Morgan Feldman, Bre Faucheux, and all the other authors I’m failing to mention.
To Rachel Hauck and Susie May at My Book Therapy, thanks for giving me that extra confidence and help to pitch this story at ACFW.
To you, dear reader: Thank you for giving El’s story a chance. Whoever you are, you’re beautiful (or handsome!). Inside and out.
And finally I have to mention the King of my heart again. He is, after all, the Beginning and the End. You are my happily ever after, my one true pairing. And like Prince Charming, I know you will always find me.
Discussion Questions
SPOILER ALERT! Do not read these questions until you have finished the book!
Eliyana faces the loss of her mother in the opening chapters. How does her grief affect her decisions and actions in the beginning? Have you experienced a loss similar to El’s? How did your grief affect your decisions and actions during that time?
Eliyana and Ky both have less-than-perfect physical appearances—El with her birthmark and Ky with his acne. How do they deal with what others think of them? Do you notice a contrast in how El behaves in regard to her appearance versus how Ky behaves in regard to his? Who is more insecure? Why do you think so? Is there any insecurity in your life that has shaped your behavior and attitude toward yourself and others?
Throughout the story we see how the Callings relate directly to the different strengths of each character. What Calling do you think the Verity would choose for you? Why?
Elizabeth felt that keeping the truth from El was the best way to protect her. Do you agree with her decision? If it were your child, what would you have done differently? Why?
Joshua struggles with choosing between his duty to the Second Reflection and his love for El. What would you do if you were in his situation? Do you think it is right to sacrifice the well-being of many to save one? Was it right for him to take the burden upon himself, or should he have given El the choice to share in his burden? Give reasons to support your answer.
Ky says, “. . . appearances can deceive. A jagged surface doesn’t always allude to what truly lies beneath.” In a culture of Photoshopping and filtering, we often portray a rose-colored version of ourselves. Do you consider this behavior deceitful? Should we be more honest on social media? Why or why not?
Ky and Joshua share the burden of the Void in the en
d. According to the story, the Void enters “the one the vessel cares for more than any other.” It’s clear El’s heart is divided in the end, but what about the guys? Who do you feel cares more for Eliyana and why?
In the final chapter, El thinks, “. . . my worth isn’t defined by others.” If this is true, what or who does define our worth? Do you gauge your worth by what others think or say about you? Discuss El’s inner journey. Her physical appearance hasn’t changed, but how has she transformed?
Does the opening poem (“Once upon a time is ne’er what it seems . . .”) hold any truth? Oftentimes we romanticize what love should look like. We think of fairy tales and Prince or Princess Charming and create expectations that can be impossible to meet. Is love an action or a feeling? What does it mean to “fall” in love? What does “true” love look like to you? Can you share an example?
El hasn’t known Ky very long. We discover “a Kiss of Infinity isn’t something you decide to bestow. It comes from the deepest part of your soul. Stems from desires and emotions you may not even be aware you possess.” Why do you think El was able to give Ky a Kiss of Infinity? What does this say about her as a person? What do you predict will come of El and Ky’s relationship in the next book? What about El and Joshua?
Ky sacrifices himself in the final showdown with Crowe. Do you think Ky knew he carried a piece of the Verity? Why or why not? He not only saved El from taking on the Void, but he also saved Ebony, a traitor. What does this say about him? After all that transpired in the story, are you Team Joshua or Team Ky? Give reasons to support your answer.
Ebony sought revenge on El because of their father Tiernan. Do you think Ebony’s actions were justified? Should she be punished for her behavior or should she be pardoned? Give reasons to support your answer.
To learn more about Sara Ella and her upcoming books, check out:
Website: saraella.com
Facebook: writinghistruth
Twitter: @SaraEllaWrites
Instagram: saraellawrites
