“Then why are you acting so odd?”
“I’m not. This is me.” The hot sip scalded his throat and teared up his eyes. Damn it. He was losing composure.
“Finn…you’re not such a good liar. Since you saw Damien at the door, you’ve been acting strange. What’s going on?” Samantha asked, frustrated.
He had to divert her attention from the topic. So he tried the half-truth policy and hoped she bought it. Shrugging nonchalantly, he said, “I thought I saw someone I knew. It threw me off a bit, that’s all.” He gingerly took another sip. “It’s nothing. My brain is just overworked and is seeing things.”
“Oh, are you sure that’s all it was?”
“Yes, Sam. Don’t read too much into it.”
“So you like him?” she asked him with a bright smile on her face.
He should have known it would take a turn to this question. It had been a while since he had seen his partner so happy about someone. There had always been a hidden sadness within her and though he had never pushed her to reveal much about herself, he felt that Damien was changing that. She talked and laughed more than usual. She was slowly dropping the strictly professional demeanor she usually had and slipping into casual mode now and then. He had just met the man but he was already seeing the effect he had on Samantha.
He was happy that she was happy. He cared deeply for her like a brother would a sister. She was an excellent partner. She always had his back and he wanted to have hers too. He did not want to see her hurt but until he found out anything more, he had to play the happy friend.
“I know you just met him but what do you think?” she prompted him.
“He’s good to you?” When she nodded, he evasively added, “If you’re happy, so am I.”
Samantha laughed. “That’s vague, man.”
“Like you said, I just met the man. Can’t judge him that quick, can I?” he grinned.
Her blue eyes shone brightly as she stared at the spot where Damien had vanished into the night and then turned the soft smile on to Finn.
“I’m going to head home now.” She pulled out her clutch from her shoulder bag and made to put down a few bills before Finn caught her hand. “What are you doing?”
“Dinner’s on me, Sam.”
She looked surprised then nodded her thanks. “You’re going to go home too, right?”
He chose that moment to take a long sip from his cup and gave her a thumbs up. She threw him an assessing look and then bid him good night before walking out of the diner. He silently thanked God that he did not have to drop her off. He would have blurted out something inappropriate within the closed space. He finished off his cup, pulled out some bills including a generous tip and got up.
“Thanks Mary,” he smiled at the waitress who was clearing the table.
“Late night, Agent?”
“A few, you could say. When did you change your shift?”
“I’m working a double since last week.”
Finn stared at the dark circles under her eyes and frowned. Since Mama Bailey’s was their regular spot, he had come to know some of the staff and their stories. Mary had a dead beat of a husband who pushed her to earn more while he wasted it all away by gambling and drinking.
“You know you just have to say the word and we will lock his ugly ass up, right?”
Mary smiled tiredly. “I know. I appreciate that. But this time it isn’t for him.” She placed a hand on her stomach and announced, “I’m pregnant.”
“Oh!” Finn smiled widely and leaned in for a quick hug, “Congratulations!”
“Thanks. I’m happy about it. And because I want to stay that way when this little kicker comes out, I kicked him out.” She put emphasis on him to make Finn understand. “Your partner has been an angel. She helped me get a restraining order against him. He’s not coming anywhere near us now,” she finished in a fierce tone.
Samantha had mentioned something about a restraining order a few days ago but Finn had been busy working on some report so had not been listening. He wished Mary well and told her take care of herself. The news of her pregnancy reminded him to check up on his older sister who was carrying as well. He stood on the street a bit undecided. He had had a long day. His body ached and he was in a desperate need for a shower. His mind rebelled with his body and then he took steps towards the agency.
“Haley? Oh thank God you’re here.” Finn pushed open the tech room door and greeted the woman spinning on the chair.
Haley popped her gum and shook her finger at him. “Unlike you workaholics, I haven’t been here the whole day. My shift changed and I just got in. Tell me Agent, what can I do for you?”
“You’re going to be working the night shift from now on?”
“It’s a temporary change. The new guy is still learning the ropes so they put him in the morning shift. Something about mornings being better on the brain,” Haley explained.
“Can you run a photo through facial recognition?”
“Okay. What have you got?”
Haley pulled herself towards a computer and accepted the mobile phone Finn placed in her hand. She typed away on the keyboard and a photo slowly appeared on the screen. Once it was fully uploaded, she whistled. “Damn. He’s hot. What did he do?”
Finn stared grimly at the screen. “That’s what I intend to find out.”
“It’ll be a while. He’s not in our databases but I’m checking to see if he is in any other systems. Do you have anything on him? It might help speed up the search.”
“He’s not in our database?” That took Finn by complete surprise. “Are you sure?”
“Are you telling me how to do my job? Of course I’m sure.”
“I could have sworn…” He had to check those files again. Tomorrow. He would do it tomorrow. Right now he was not in the right state to do anything. It could wait a few hours. “Sorry. Just run it through everything you can and let me know what you find out, okay?”
“Is this high priority?”
“Not high enough to wake me up. I need a few hours. Have everything compiled and I’ll look into it in the morning.” He hesitated at the door and then added. “If it helps…I have a name. Not sure if it’s a current alias or…”
“Anything can help. What’s the name?”
“Damien.”
“Got it, sir.” Her fingers started to fly across the keyboard once again. She was searching every database there was to search for the face which now had a search filter.
“Good night, Haley and thank you.”
Chapter 2
Samantha stared at the calendar as an overwhelming feeling of sadness swept through her. It was exactly three years to the date when she had heard the news. Today was the death anniversary of her father. When she had woken up, she had gone on with her routine. The days had been such a blur to her that she had almost missed the date.
Now standing in the bedroom, the date on the calendar seemed glaringly large to her eyes. Picking up the photo frame from the dresser, she slid to her knees on the carpet. It was one of her favorite photos of her and her father. She still remembered the day they had taken the photo. It was planted vividly in her mind.
It was right before she had left for college. She had been upset about missing the trip her friends had planned for her birthday because she had been down with chicken pox. By the time she had recovered and come out of isolation, most of her friends had already gone. Her father had watched her mope around the house and then decided to surprise her. She had woken up to find her room covered in balloons and tied to one of the balloons was tiny box containing the keys to a brand new motorcycle. The exact model that she had been pining after.
She had been so ecstatic that day. They had gotten their neighbor to snap so many photos of father and daughter posing in front of the sleek motorcycle, with her laughing at her father’s ridiculous jokes. Despite his constant worry for her safety, he had finally given into her heart’s desire.
Smiling sadly, she traced the lines of her father’s face. He had been the only man who had ever kept her so happy in her life. And then suddenly life took him away from her.
She had been on an assignment. It was right in the middle of the important part when the call had come. Mark Gideon had gone on a night grocery run and on the way back, a drunken driver had crashed into his car sending them both off the road. He had been alive when they had hit the water, but in the attempt to rescue the other driver, he had lost his life. She had seen so much red that moment that she had almost shot her then partner.
She had talked to him the morning before and the last thing he had said to her was that he loved her and that he was proud of his little warrior. Tears pricked her eyes as his strong, gruff voice resonated in her head now. She missed him so much. He had been her pillar. Her strength. The hollow in her chest ached and she pulled her knees up, hugging herself tightly.
“Peaches?”
Wrapped up in her grief, she had almost forgotten about Damien being there. Furiously rubbing her eyes against her sleeve, she tried to paste a smile on her face but could only manage a weak, watery one. The denim clad legs bend before her and his face lined with her, concern written all over it. His warm hand engulfed hers as his eyes assessed her surroundings. He took in the photo beside her and understanding dawned on his face.
He sat down crossed legged on the carpet and pulled her onto his lap, offering comfort through touch, not saying a single word. She appreciated it. But also hated how much vulnerable it made her. The second his hand started to stroke soothing patterns on her back, her flood gates opened and she wept pathetically across his chest.
He just held her, providing warmth and comfort in his hold. It took her a while to calm but she did finally. Hiccupping and sniffling, she lifted her head and cringed when he looked at her. She must have looked awful. She definitely felt awful but the weight in her heart seemed lighter. Her face started to redden from the tears and snot flowed from her nose. A bark of laughter escaped her startling both of them. Before she could put a handle on her emotion, she was giggling like crazy in his arms.
Damien looked down at the forlorn face and twinge went through him. He did not like the pain he saw in her eyes. He wished he had the power to take it away and bring back the laughter. The pain of loss was a heavy one and he knew words did not provide comfort like just being there for someone. So he did not speak but held on to the fragile state of her as she cried her heart out.
Brushing a strand of damp hair from her flushed forehead, he gently wiped at the stray tear. Her face took an odd expression and then a bubble of laughter burst forth from her lips. He stared at her in bemusement as her body now rocked with hysterical giggles and fresh tears sprung from her eyes. She tried to control it but it just made it worse. His lips twitched and he could not help but smile down at her as she curled up in mirth.
“I’m so sorry,” she gasped out. “I don’t know what has gotten into me.”
He chuckled and rubbed her arm as she shook. “Let it all out. You’ll feel better.”
“I do,” she laughed and slung an arm over his shoulder. “I feel better now. Thank you.”
Damien gazed softly at her and lightly kissed the corner of her mouth. “I’m sorry for your loss.”
Samantha grazed her palm across his light stubble and found it oddly soothing. Curling her knees, she placed both arms around his neck and settled comfortably in his lap. “It’s been three years but the pain doesn’t go away.”
“And it won’t. It’ll lessen to an extent but it’ll never go away completely. Your father?”
She nodded and picked up the frame. “This is one my favorites of us. His death was sudden. The shock was too big. I didn’t know then if I could get through it but I pushed, stumbling, sinking then rising again. Sometimes I try and imagine if I would have felt differently had he been sick, if it would have hurt less had I seen it coming…”
“It wouldn’t have mattered. He was your father either way. You loved him too much for the pain not to be equal in amount. But you’re a warrior. You fought your way through the pain and survived. He would be proud of you, you know.”
Huge blue eyes gazed at him in wonder and suddenly he felt uneasy. Had he said the wrong thing? He did not wish to add to her pain. He knew the pain of losing someone. Two someone’s to be exact. He remembered when he had lost his parents. Those had been dark days for the little lost boy with no one left in the world to care even a little.
“He used to call me his little warrior,” Samantha whispered, a sad smile on her lips.
“He knew exactly what he was talking about,” Damien smiled.
“Come with me,” she said suddenly. “Come with me to the cemetery. Every year I go visit his grave and talk to him a bit. I know he can’t hear me…talking to a pile of dirt isn’t the sanest idea but it makes me feel better. I know it’s irrational but I feel like he is listening. Like he wants to hear what has happened in the past year.” She broke off, embarrassed and looked away. “It’s okay if you don’t want to come.”
“I would love to,” Damien said softly. He knew it was a huge thing for Samantha to ask him to come see her father. He doubted she had taken many to his grave and instead of the fact scaring him, it pleased him immensely. He was becoming a part of her life. He liked the idea very much.
They dressed, had coffee and toast and then Damien drove them to the cemetery. It was a silent drive and once they were there, he glanced at Samantha. Her eyes were brimming with tears again but she put on a trembling smile and led him through the rows of headstone to the one where her father was buried.
Mark Gideon
1956 – 2013
Loving father and son
‘Look deep within yourself and you will find
what you are searching for.’
Samantha kneeled and brushed away the leaves on the beautiful marble headstone. “Hi Dad. It’s been a while.”
Damien touched her shoulder and gave her a reassuring smile. “I’ll give you the space.” He walked away and stood underneath a tree, keeping her well within his sight but out of hearing distance.
Samantha appreciated Damien giving her the privacy. She would not have minded him standing there with her but she wanted to talk to her father alone before she introduced him. She had so much to tell him. She started off randomly. She never knew where to begin.
“It’s been a crazy year. Well, not that crazy but it’s started to get there. I didn’t come alone you know. I brought someone. I know. I brought someone, it’s almost unbelievable. I can’t believe I did it either but I think you’ll like him. I want him to meet you. His name is Damien…Damien Black. I met him recently but there are days I feel like I have known him my whole life. He’s not like anyone I have met before and I guess that’s the part of him that intrigues me. I’m always discovering things about him that take me by surprise. Pleasant surprise. He’s charming and sweet. You would have liked him, Dad, once you got past the shooting threat. He’s a good man.” She glanced over to where Damien was standing and offered him a smile which he returned. “I’m feeling all these emotions, Dad. Emotions I have never felt before. It scares me. The idea of getting attached will always scare me but this time I don’t want it to scare me so much that I lose someone so precious over the fear. What should I do, Dad? Should I let him in fully? I know this sounds and feels crazy but I think I’m falling for him. I’m falling for Damien and I don’t know how to stop.”
Chapter 3
Damien found himself kneeling beside Samantha, his arms wrapped around her shoulders as silent tears flow down her cheeks. She wiped her tears with one hand and wrapped the other one over his.
“Dad, this is Damien,” she introduced him, smiling softly. “Damien, this is my Dad, Mark Gideon.”
“Hi sir. It’s an honor to meet you. I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for giving the world such a beautiful and brave woman. I’m sorry I co
uldn’t properly meet the man who raised her.”
Damien talked quietly, his eyes fixed on the headstone engraving. He had never done this. Talked to a grave. Oddly, it felt nice. His parents had gotten cremated as per their wishes and were part of the big ocean now, so he did not have a place to talk his mind like Samantha did. Even though his belief in the higher power was close to nil, somewhere in his heart he felt that Mark Gideon was watching over them. He talked a bit more, mostly describing his daughter, not once moving his gaze to look at Samantha but he felt her beside him, encouraging him through her body language.
Once he was done talking, they just sat down on the grass with their legs crossed and talked to each other. The clouds took on a gray appearance and that was their cue to leave. Saying goodbye, they walked back towards his car.
“Thank you for coming,” Samantha said once they were seated inside the car.
“You don’t have to thank me, Peaches.”
“I’ve never taken anybody to Dad’s grave before,” she confessed.
His dark eyes looked at her unwaveringly, strong emotion clouding them. “I suspected as much. Thank you,” he emphasized. “It was a privilege.”
“He would have liked you.”
“After he chased me around a bit, of course?” Damien said in light amusement.
It had its intended effect. Samantha laughed. “Oh God, yes. He had a gun collection just to scare away the boys. It always worked.” Then in a much serious voice, she added, “But you wouldn’t have run away, right?”
“No. Nothing would have scared me away from you.”
Samantha flushed at his answer and looked outside the window. Her head was a mess today. As was her heart. It was thumping way too fast against her ribs every time she heard him speak. Her stomach felt light and fluttery every time she found him looking at her. She had heard of the signs but had never felt them before. They terrified and intrigued her at the same time. If only she knew how he felt.
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