by David Weber
“But why? ” Bahzell pressed. “Oh, aye, I can respect those things, but why turn to a god for them? Why thank a god for wisdom when it comes out of your own head? Or for beauty, when it’s your own eyes that have the seeing of it? Or for guts and loyalty, when those things come from in here -” his huge hand brushed Tothas’ chest “-and not from out there?” The same hand rose and gestured at the skies.
“You follow them, yet not one of them’s reached down to you and said, ‘This is a good man, who’s been after doing all I ask of him, and I take his illness from him.’ Not one of them, Tothas, and still you follow!” He shook his head. “That’s a thing no hradani would be understanding. It’s not my folk’s way to ask others for aught. We’ve learned the hard way that it won’t be given, that there’s no one and naught to count on but our own selves when all’s said and done. What we have, we build or take for ourselves, and spit on ‘gods’ who’ve no time for such as us. A man looks after his own in this world, Tothas, and it’s lucky he is if he can do it, for no one else will!”
Tothas smiled.
“That sounds to me like a man who’s angry at what he hears himself saying.”
“Whether I’m liking it or hating it won’t change what is ,” Bahzell shot back. “It’s the way of the world, and no one knows it better than hradani, for we’ve seen it too often. Aye, we’ve had a bellyful of it!”
The Spearman looked up at him for another long moment, then cocked his head.
“Why are you here, Bahzell?” he asked softly.
“Eh?” Bahzell blinked down at the human.
“Why are you here?” Tothas repeated. “In a world where a man looks after his own and Phrobus take the hindmost, why did you save Lady Zarantha in Riverside and why are you still here? Why didn’t you leave us to fend for ourselves once we left the city?”
“Because I’ve a head of solid rock,” Bahzell said bitterly, and Tothas’ laugh was soft.
“I believe that. Oh, yes, I believe that, my friend! But if you believe that’s the only reason, you know yourself less well than you think.”
“Now don’t you be thinking I’m aught but what I am,” Bahzell said uneasily. “Stupid, aye, and one who’s yet to learn to think before he acts-that I’ll grant you! And maybe I’ve a wee bit of guts, and a notion my word should be meaning something when I give it, but I’m no knight in shining armor. No, and I’ve no least desire to be one, either!”
“ ‘A knight in shining armor’?” There was a smile in Tothas’ voice, and he slapped the hradani on the elbow. “No, you’re certainly not that , Bahzell Bahnakson! The gods only know all that you may be, but I don’t think even they could see you as that!”
“Aye, and don’t you be forgetting it!” Bahzell snorted.
“I won’t,” Tothas reassured him. He gathered his blanket about him and shivered, then turned back towards the fire. “But while I’m remembering you aren’t, you might ask yourself whoever said you should be? Or why in Tomanāk’s name the gods should need one?”
Bahzell stared after him, ears at half-cock, and the Spearman chuckled as he picked his way back to his bedroll through the windy cold.
Chapter Seventeen
The rain started at dawn; by midday the racing spatter of drops had become a steady, bone-chilling downpour.
Bahzell slogged through it, head bent against the wind while his cloak snapped about his knees like a living thing, and a weary litany of curses rolled through his mind at what the icy rain was doing to Tothas. The armsman rode in the center of the column, huddled deep in his cloak, and Zarantha and Rekah both rode upwind of him in a vain effort to shield him. It was a sign of his distress that he didn’t even notice what they were trying to do, and the Horse Stealer gritted his teeth every time one of those terrible, strangling coughs twisted the Spearman.
The sloping road was ankle-deep in watery mud that wore away at their strength and spirits, and the storm cut the already short day still shorter. Bahzell had started searching for a suitable campsite before midafternoon, but the hillsides were clothed in scrub, without sheltering trees. Even without the soaking rain, firewood would have been hard to find, and the thought of subjecting Tothas to a fireless camp in such weather tightened Bahzell’s belly. But it was evening now; the light was going fast, they had to stop soon, and he was almost desperate when a flicker of movement caught the corner of his eye.
He turned his head quickly, but whatever it was had vanished into a barren hillside. His raised hand halted the column, and he reached up under his cloak; it was an awkward way to draw a sword, but he managed it, and Brandark walked his horse up beside him.
“What?” Even the Bloody Sword’s tenor was worn and creaky, and Bahzell nodded at the hill.
“I’m thinking I saw something yonder.”
“What?” Brandark repeated with a bit more interest.
“Now that’s what I’m none too sure of,” the Horse Stealer admitted. “But whatever it was, it up and disappeared.”
“Up there?” Brandark eyed the rocky, water-running slope skeptically.
“Aye.” Bahzell studied the hillside for another moment, then shrugged. “Wait here,” he said shortly, and started up the slope.
It was hard going, and he couldn’t have told Brandark why he was bothering, yet something poked at the corner of his brain. Chill water ran knee-deep as he waded up a gully towards the point where the movement had disappeared, and he was almost there when he heard a deep, angry squall.
He rocked back on his heels as a tawny shape flowed out of the very ground. It was a dire cat-not the enormous predator that ruled the Eastwall Mountains, but the smaller cousin that roamed their foothills-and Bahzell’s ears flattened as black lips wrinkled back from four-inch ivory fangs and the cat squalled again, furious at his intrusion.
But dire cats were as intelligent as they were deadly, and the beast let out yet a third squall-this one of pure frustration-as it digested Bahzell’s size and the menace of his sword. It hunkered down on the rock, tail lashing as if to pounce, then hissed in disgust and vanished into the rain in a single, prodigious leap.
Bahzell released the deep, tense breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, but even as he exhaled a suspicion as to why the cat had been so angry touched him. His eyes narrowed, and he moved forward again more eagerly.
There! An out-thrust shoulder of rock had hidden it from below, but a narrow slit pierced the hillside. It was tall enough even for Bahzell, though it would be a tight fit for his shoulders, and he edged into it. He felt his way for several yards, rubbing against the rock, muscles taut and sword ready. No dire cat would have abandoned a regular lair without a fight, sword or no sword, but Bahzell wasn’t about to assume anything, and if the cat had a mate-
It didn’t. Another ten feet, and gray light beckoned. The rock opened up, and he inched further forward, then came to a stop and smiled broadly.
It was a cave, and large enough for all their mounts, at that. Runoff cascaded from an open cleft in the high roof into a churning pool which must have an underground outlet, since it hadn’t risen to flow out through the cave entrance. There was no fuel here, but he’d gathered a heavy load of kindling as soon as the rain started. The packhorse had tossed its head in protest when he’d added the wood to its load and covered it with a cloak, but it would be enough to dry whatever fuel he and Brandark could gather from the scrub at the base of the hill. All they had to do was get the beasts up here. That didn’t promise to be easy, but Bahzell Bahnakson would cheerfully have tackled a far more difficult task to get out of the rain.
He sheathed his sword and started back to tell the others.
***
Something woke him, and, for a change, it wasn’t a dream. He sat up, straining his ears as he wondered what it had been, but he detected no danger.
Red and yellow light flowed over rock walls as the small fire crackled cheerfully, and the smell of horses and mules mingled with the smoke. The combined body heat of animals an
d people had helped the fire warm the cave, and his bedroll was almost dry. Taken all together, he was more comfortable than he’d had any right to expect after such a day, and he’d tumbled into his blankets in weary gratitude. But he was oddly wide awake now, and he stretched.
Brandark sat cross-legged by the cave entrance, sheathed sword on his thighs. The rain must have eased, for the water no longer chattered and hissed into the pool. It fell gently, almost musically, soft enough for Brandark to hear Bahzell stir and turn his head.
“What are you doing up?” he asked quietly as the Horse Stealer rose.
“I’ve no idea,” Bahzell replied, equally quietly. He yawned and stretched again, then shrugged and parked himself beside Brandark. “But it’s up I am, so if you’re minded to turn in-?”
“It’s my watch,” Brandark disagreed with a little headshake.
“In that case, I’ll just be keeping you company for a bit-unless you’ve some objection?”
Brandark chuckled and shook his head again, and Bahzell looked over his shoulder to survey the others. Tothas looked much better than he had when they half-carried him into the cave, and Zarantha and Rekah were curled up like kittens under the blankets they shared. The soft, steady sound of breathing carried through the musical patter of water and the crackle of the fire, and an odd sense of safety-of comfort-seemed to fill the cave.
He turned back to join Brandark in watching the cave’s narrow stone throat, and a companionable silence enveloped them. They’d have to move on in the morning, and the fact that the rain had eased for now was no guarantee tomorrow wouldn’t be still worse, but all that mattered just now was the peace of the moment, and he savored it almost sensually.
He didn’t know how long he’d sat there when he heard the abrupt scuff of a boot on stone. He stiffened, ears rising, and felt Brandark tense beside him, but neither said anything. They just sat there, staring down the narrow passageway, and the boot scuffed again. And then, suddenly, a small, slender, brown-haired woman in a rain-beaded cloak turned a bend and stopped dead.
Bahzell’s ears went straight up in astonishment as the woman found herself face-to-face with two hradani and simply stood there. She didn’t yelp in panic, didn’t turn to flee-didn’t even stiffen in surprise. She only gazed at them with grave brown eyes, then shrugged and walked calmly forward.
“Good evening,” she said in a soft, husky contralto, and Bahzell blinked. He turned a look of disbelief on Brandark, and the same expression looked back at him. Then the two of them turned as one to the newcomer, and Bahzell cleared his throat.
“Ah, and a good evening to yourself.”
“Would you mind dreadfully if I shared your cave?” she asked in that same calm voice, as unruffled as if things like this happened to her every day. “It’s rather wet outside,” she added with a small smile, and Bahzell shook his head in bemusement. “Thank you,” she said, and untied her cloak.
She must, the Horse Stealer thought, be insane. She had to have seen the light of their fire before she ever started up the entry passage, but not only had she walked slap up to them and refused to turn a hair when she found a pair of hradani, she wasn’t even armed-not with so much as a dagger!
She seemed totally unconcerned as she stepped forward, draped her cloak near the fire, and unslung the small harp case she’d worn on her back beneath it. She settled down beside the fire and cocked her head as she regarded them with those huge brown eyes.
“Something smells good,” she announced.
“Ah, help yourself,” Brandark invited, and gestured at the covered pot of beans and salt pork left over from supper.
“Thank you,” she said again, and reached into her belt pouch. The knife she produced would have been as useless for self-defense as the fork and spoon that came with it, but gems glittered in their handles, and Bahzell’s eyes narrowed. Those eating utensils would have been at home on a duke’s table; no one in his right mind flashed something that valuable before two unknown warriors of any stripe, much less two with the reputation of hradani. He watched her select a tin bowl and ladle food into it, then cleared his throat.
“Don’t be taking me wrongly,” he said carefully, “but are you after being in the habit of walking up to strange camps like this?”
“Like what?”
“Like what?!” Bahzell blinked and glanced at Brankdark again. “What I mean to be saying, ah, Lady, is that, well, not everyone’s exactly- I mean-”
He broke off in unaccustomed confusion, and she smiled at him. It was quite a lovely smile, he thought, watching it light her triangular, spritelike face, and felt himself smile back for no good reason.
“Thank you for your concern, but I’ll be all right. I’m only a wandering bard, after all. No one would hurt me.”
“Begging your pardon,” Brandark said, “but I wouldn’t count on that. What my friend means is that one of these days you’re likely to run into someone who will hurt you-or worse.”
“Well, you two won’t, will you?” Amusement flickered in her grave eyes, and the hradani found themselves shaking their heads in unison. “There, you see?” She swallowed a mouthful of food and sighed. “Ummm! Delicious. I miss good, simple cooking like this.”
“Uh, yes,” Brandark said helplessly. Someone should lock this lunatic up in a nice, safe cage, but her simple confidence in her own safety was a shield that baffled him. He knew she was insane, and so did Bahzell, but how did they tell her that?
She smiled at them and returned to her food with slow, obvious relish. She cleaned the bowl of the last morsel, chasing the final bean around and around it with almost childish delight, then sighed once more.
“Oh, that was nice! ” She closed her eyes as if to savor some special treat, then opened them with another smile. “Thank you for your generosity.”
“It was only a bowl of beans,” Brandark protested, and she shrugged.
“Perhaps. But it was all you had, and you shared it with a stranger. How can I repay you?”
“Brandark’s the right of it,” Bahzell said uncomfortably. “It was naught but a bowl of beans, and it’s welcome to it you were.”
“Oh, I insist on paying something ,” she said with yet another of those lovely smiles, and reached for her harp. “If you won’t accept anything else, perhaps I could sing for my supper?”
Eyebrows arched above brilliant eyes, and the hradani nodded like puppets as she uncased her harp. A corner of Bahzell’s brain said something very strange was happening, but the thought was tiny, lost and unimportant.
She drew out her harp, and air hissed between Brandark’s teeth. The strings shone silver in a frame of midnight ebony, and faceted gems flashed back the fire from the tuning pegs. The forearm was a woman, draped in a flowing, archaic gown, mouth open in song, and the Bloody Sword blinked as the bard tucked the instrument against her shoulder, for the carved face matched her own. He started to speak, but then her fingers stroked the strings and he froze, mouth hanging open, as music filled the cave.
No one could wring that rich, rippling purity from a harp that small! It wasn’t the sound of a single harp at all-he knew it wasn’t. Viols and lutes sounded in the background, laughing dulcimers wove in and out between the harp notes, bassoons and oboes crooned to violins and the deep, sweet voice of cellos, and he knew it couldn’t happen even as it did. But then she opened her mouth, and he forgot the music, forgot the smell of horses and smoke and wet cloth and the rock he sat upon. He forgot everything, for there was nothing-nothing but that voice.
He could never remember it clearly later. That was the cruelest curse and the greatest blessing of all, for if he had been able to remember, his love of music would have died forever. Who could be content with the mud pies of children playing in a ditch when he’d seen the work of Saramantha’s greatest sculptors? If he were able to remember-really remember -that voice, he would hunger only to hear it once more, and its perfection would turn all other voices, all other music, to dust and ashes in his mout
h.
Yet if he could never recall it clearly, he would always know he’d heard it once. That for a single night, in a smelly winter cave, he’d experienced all the splendor after which he’d fumbled for so many years. Not death itself could take that from him, and he knew he would hear its echo in every other song.
She sang words they’d never heard, in a language they’d never known, and it didn’t matter. They sat motionless, two barbarian hradani, lost in a beauty beyond imagining, and she took them with her. She swept them away into another place, where time was irrelevant and there was no world, no reality, no meaning but the music of her harp, the majesty of her voice, and the glow of her huge brown eyes. They soared with her, flew on her wings, tasted things for which there were no words in any language, and then, as gently as she’d borne them aloft, she returned them to their own world, and the greatest magic of all was that she did not break their hearts. That they returned unscarred, content to be who and what they were, for it would have been so easy-so unthinkably easy-to surrender all they’d ever been for the chance to become two more notes in that glorious sound.
Her voice died, her hand stilled the strings, and Brandark Brandarkson went to his knees before her.
“My Lady,” he whispered, and tears fogged his voice and soaked his face.
“Don’t be silly, Brandark.” Her voice was no longer a weapon to break men’s hearts but laughing and tender, and her slender hand brushed his head. She gripped an ear and tugged, and he looked up, his own eyes suddenly laughing through his tears, and she nodded. “Better,” she said. “Now stand up, Brandark. You’ve never come to me on your knees before; I see no reason to begin now.”
He smiled and rose, and Bahzell blinked like a man waking from sleep.
