She did, but the washing of that large male body was pure torture, could be
described as naught else. It made her heart pound to do it, her pulses race, and
her pointed nipples became almost painful, prodding against the scratchy wool of
her bliaut. Washing him was just too reminiscent of the times she had forced him
to readiness, too similar to caressing him. And his manroot had grazed against
her arm enough times that she knew it was fair to bursting before she got around
to washing it, too.
Her face was on fire. His was still strikingly handsome, for he was still
grinning, amused by her discomfort. She did not even care about that now,
because her face was not the only thing heated. She had the sudden, mad urge to
crawl into that tub with him.
She leaped to her feet instead and began soaping his hair. But she did it too
vigorously, with too much soap that drifted down into his eyes.
?Enough, wench,? he complained.
?Rinse it now.?
Rowena reached for the bucket, relieved that she was almost finishedand
remembered there was no hot water left.
?You will have to wait?
?Nay, do it now.?
?Butmy lord, the water is?
?Now, blast you!?
Her lips pinched together. Well, he asked for it, did he not? With a good deal
of pleasure, she dumped the icy well water over his head.
She heard him suck in his breath, along with the water streaming down his face,
which then caused him to choke and sputter. Her moment of pleasure turned to
alarm. He was going to beat her now, even though ?twas not her fault. He did not
leap from the tub, but she still backed slowly toward the door as he wiped the
water from his faceuntil his hands lowered and those silver eyes pinned her to
the spot.
?II tried to tell you there was no warm water leftmy lord.?
?So you did. Were my eyes not stinging, I might have listened.?
She stiffened.
?So you will blame me anyway? Had you asked, I could have told you I had never
bathed anyone ere this, knew not the way of?
?Be quiet!?
He was definitely annoyed, but it did not look as if he was going to get up and
beat her, so she offered ?What will you wear now? I will fetch it.?
?There is no need. I have missed my own bed and intend to go straight to it.?
?Thenmay I be excusedmy lord??
The hesitation she kept giving his address was deliberate, and the look he gave
her said he knew it, which was possibly why he answered ?Nay, you will dry me
first,? but that was more likely her punishment for the cold water. Only he
stood up as he said it, and standing far away from him, she could not help but
see too much of his body.
She started to shake her head, to refuse again to obey him, but he asked first,
?Are you pleased with what your ministrations have wrought??
?Nay!? she said emphatically.
?You always were before,? he reminded her.
His voice was too husky. God?s mercy, was he going to try to seduce her into
wanting him? If so,?twould likely only be to then dismiss her and send for his
Celia. He had had his like for like. He could not want her again. Nay, all he
wanted was more revenge.
?II like rape no more than you did,? she told him miserably.
?I have told you how sorry I am for what was done to you. When will your revenge
end??
?When it no longer infuriates me to look at you. When every offense has been
satisfied. When I have killed your brother for my squire?s death. When I lose
interest, wench, and not before? mayhap never.?
Chapter 21
Rowena lay on her uncomfortable bed on the floor of the weaving room, wide awake.
She had put her chemise back on before bedding down. The coarse wool might be
scratchy, but the even rougher woolen pallet was much worse, and so the chemise
offered her some little ease. She was getting no other kind, not from her
thoughts, not from her bellyand not from the disquieting feelings Lord Vengeance
had stirred up in her.
She did not understand those feelings. She did not want Warrick de Chaville. She
could not want a man she hated. Yet many times these past days he had made her
want him, despite her hate, and her body had remembered that tonight and
responded, once again, not as she wished it to.
And he had been so angry after being reminded of all the reasons he wanted
revenge against her. He had contained it well, however. It had only been seen in
his expressive eyes. But that was enough to make Rowena tremble. And he liked
her fear. ?Twas almost enough to pacify himalmost.
Her feet had felt wooden when she approached him with the soft drying cloth. And
his cold voice had not relieved her any.
?On your knees again,? he had ordered.
?And take care, wench, that you do not miss a single drop of moisture. Do I
catch a chill because of your negligence, I will beat you for it.?
He had said that as if his other threats of beatings had lacked substance. She
doubted that, but was concerned only with this threat. And in selfdefense, she
forced herself to dry him slowly, to make sure she left no patch of skin even a
little bit damp.
?Twas an experience she did not ever want to repeat. Her fearful trembling had
turned to another kind. And he knew. He watched her like a hawk, so he could not
help but see the effect he was having on her. Of course, the effect she was
having on him was even more obvious, was staring her right in the face, and her
fascination with his manroot returned. Against her will, she even caressed it as
she dried it.
That was when he had snapped at her to get out. She had been surprised, but had
not waited around for him to repeat the order. She had run out of there, and
straight up the stairs near his solar that led to the women?s quarters, which
included the sewing and weaving rooms.
The latter had been dark and empty then, for the hour had still been early, the
other women down in the hall. Rowena should have just calmed herself some, then
gone back down to get something to eat. Instead she had fetched a torch from the
corridor to light a few candles in the room, made her pallet, put her chemise
back on, and gone to bed.
Getting to sleep was another matter. She was still awake when four of the
weavers came in together, spoke quietly amongst themselves for a few minutes,
then all drifted off to sleep without the least difficulty. She was still awake
when the noisy rumbles from her belly joined the soft sounds of the others
sleeping. She was still awake when the door opened again sometime after matins,
and a huge shape stood there, silhouetted against the light behind it.
She knew who it was. She had even somehow suspected he would come, even while
she had imagined him relieving himself with Celia. Unlessdid he think his Celia
was here? Was it his favorite he had come for, and not her?
But ?twas Rowena he faced when he said ?Come.?
She did not doubt now that he spoke to her, even though his face was no more
than a black shadow. None of the other women stirred, but Rowena did not move
either, except to shake her head.
He put out
his hand and repeated that single word, and she was assailed with
memories of his hands on her, of the incredible pleasure his body had recently
forced on hersand she shook her head again, violently. She did not want that
pleasure again, not from him.
He had more words to say to her denial, quietly, for only her ears.
?You are having the same difficulty as I, or you would not be still awake. I for
one do not mean to suffer it any longer. Come now, or I will carry you from here.?
She dreaded the scene that that would cause, which was guaranteed to wake the
others, but still she did not move, so he added ?Your screams will not matter.
Have you not realized that yet??
She had a little more dignity than that. But since she was likely to scream if
he touched her, she got up and followed him out of the room but no further than
the empty corridor. He walked on, fully expecting her to follow him. When he
finally realized she was not behind him, he came back, though he was not angryat
least not yet. His brow was merely lifted in question.
?Do you require assistance??
His nonchalance was infuriating.
?I am not going with you,? she told him baldly, stiffly.
?You had your revenge on me in that way. To force me again would not be like for
like.?
?Did I say you would only have like for like, wench? After today you should know
better. However I choose to exact retribution from you, so it will be done.?
And then he shrugged, just before that humorless smile came to his lips.
?But this has naught to do with that. Merely has it occurred to me that you
truly are no more than a serf now, and so bound to Fulkhurst as any other serf.
This means you can do naught without my permission, and like any other serf, you
owe me my due. This also means that, as with any other female serf, if I decide
to toss your skirts and avail myself of what lies between your legs at any time,
in any place, that is my privilege. So if I tell you to get yourself to my bed,
you will make haste to do so. Is this clear to you??
?Aye, but?
?Aye, what??
?My lord,? she snapped.
?You are a slow learner. But then, little better can be expected of one so
stupid as you.?
?I am not stupidmy lord.?
?Are you not? You do not think it was stupid of you to try and steal a child
from me??
?Not stupid,? she confessed ?just very wrongbut I had no choice.?
?No one held a knife at your throat,? he said harshly.
She had been warned not to offer excuses. He was now angry, and not like to
listen to them even if she dared try to make him understand. But she could not
let pass what he had kept her from saying after his damning recital of her
present position, even if it made him angrier.
?You know as well as I that I am no serf, Lord Warrick. If I were, I would no
doubt agree with all you have said, and might even feel differently about aa
summons from you in the middle of the night. But calling me serf does not make
it so, does not change feelings, does not let me accept what you term ?privilege.??
?You are fond of telling me you had no choice. Think you that you have a choice
in this??
?Then you will have to chain me again,? she assured him ?for I will never come
willing to your bed.?
He laughed cruelly at her confidence.
?Those chains were for your benefit, wench, not mine. I would prefer it do you
fight me, for I do not want your willingness. Nay, I want your hate, and your
shame when you finally succumb. Mayhap I will even make you beg this timefor
what you do not want.?
She paled at those words, though he did not see it in the dim light. But she
could remember clearly the last time in his bed, when he had played with her and
made her so wild, she had thought she would beg him to take her if she were not
gagged. And that would be more humiliating than all the rest combined. But she
had been chained then and unable to prevent all of those intimate caresses.
Unchained, she would fight, so he would be unable to bring her to that pitch of
need againnay, he could not make her beg him. Never.
Armed with that conviction, she was about to make the foolish mistake of telling
him it was impossible, which was the surest way to make him prove otherwise,
when her belly broke the silence first with a loud rumble. Even that embarrassed
her, particularly when his eyes dropped to stare at the offending noisemaker.
?When did you last eat?? he demanded.
?This morn.?
?Why? You had ample time?
?Not before your bath, I did not, and after, I I just wanted to hide and lick my
wounds.?
?You will not blame me for a missed meal, wench, nor will you miss another. I
care not if you starve yourself, but you will have to wait until you no longer
have my child to succor in your belly. You have little enough meat on your bones
now. Do you miss another meal, I will beat you.?
She was beginning to wonder about that threat. He sounded as if he meant it,
looked as if he meant it, but he said it too frequently for it to generate much
fear anymore.
?I have no intention of starving myself to escape your vengeance.?
?Good, because you will find there is no escape, not for you. Now come?
?I am going back to my own bed.?
?You are coming with meand did I not warn you about interrupting me??
?You did, but since you do not subscribe to that rule yourself, I did not think
you would want to be thought a hypocrite as well as a monster.?
That humorless smile was back. Actually, that smile was much more intimidating
than his threats, because it had so far presaged most of his punishments.
He took a step forward. She took one back.
?You would not think to run from me, would you, wench?? he taunted.
Her chin went up.
?Aye, why not? You mean to punish me anyway.?
And I cannot help but be quicker than you, you overgrown lout.
Before he took the step that would bring him within arm?s reach of her, she
bolted past him toward the circular stairs at the end of the corridor. If she
could just reach the hall, there would be countless places to hide, even among
the servants sleeping there. But ?twas the storage area in the basement that she
had in mind.
She raced down the stairs two at a time. She heard his curse behind her, heard
the rasp of her own breathheard the scrape of steel at the bottorn of the steps.
She came to a skidding halt. The man blocking her way held a candle in one hand,
a sword in the other. He was no older than she, but at least a hand taller.
Rowena did not have a chance to figure out a way around that sword or the young
man holding it. She was lifted off the floor from behind, and Warrick commanded
?Put that away, Bernard, and go and wake the cook.?
But the moment the boy left to do as bidden, the hard voice turned softly
menacing to whisper by her ear ?If you had not earned a punishment before, wench,
you have nowbut first I will feed you.?
Chapter 22
The kitchen was an eerie place without its blazing fire pit and many torches to
chase away the shadows. The resident rat catcher his
sed in cornplaint before
streaking off to hide behind the well. The cook was mumbling about missed sleep;
Bernard was holding his candle high so the cook could see what he was doing.
Rowena was still cradled in Warrick?s arms. Each time she moved the slightest
bit, he interpreted it as an attempt to escape and tightened his arms around her.
When he finally set her down on a stool before the table, a fine array of food
was spread out for her to choose from, all cold, but still tempting to an empty
belly. The half loaf of bread would have served as a trencher on the morrow, but
just now it was still soft, as was the butter to spread on it. There was a thick
slice of roasted beef, jellied veal hocks, and a chunk of mackerel spiced with
mint and parsley, minus the sorrel sauce it had been served with earlier. A
wedge of cheese, spiced pears, and an apple tart rounded off the meal, along
with a tankard of ale.
?Were there no partridges left?? Warrick asked the cook as Rowena started eating.
?One, my lord, but Lady Beatrix has requested it be served her in the morn?
Warrick interrupted to order ?Fetch it. My daughter can eat whatever is prepared
on the morrow, as will the rest of us. This wench is starving now.?
Rowena could not believe what she was hearing. Did he not realize he would be
making another enemy for her? You did not take from the daughter of the house to
give to a servant. To a guest, certainly, but not a servant. And the cook would
have to deal with the angry Beatrix on the morrow, so there was another enemy
for her and he was husband to Mary Blouet, who had the care of her.
?This is more food than I can eat,? Rowena quickly assured them.
?I do not need?
?You need variety/?
Warrick insisted.
?But I do not like partridge,? she lied.
?You do not feed only yourself,? he shot back.
That reminder made her face go hot with embarrassment, especially since it had
the other two men looking at her differently, as if Warrick?s strange behavior
was now quite understandable. That she was with child was likely to become
common knowledge at this rate. Coupled with the undue amount of attention
Warrick was giving her, ?twould not be hard for anyone to guess who the father
was. Did he not mind? Nay, why should he, when he intended to keep the child
Lindsey, Johanna - Prisoner Of My Desire Page 15
