by Cecilia Lane
She was glad when Sloan turned into the little neighborhood for the research facility workers. Liv pushed open her door almost before Sloan pulled to a stop. She shot a miserable smile to her driver. “Thanks for the ride.”
Sloan unbuckled her seatbelt and followed her out. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily. Let me help you get cleaned up.”
“I’m not a baby. I can do this on my own.”
“Never said you were. You’ve seen a side of your man you haven’t before and got a gnarly cut to show for it. You might be able to do this on your own, but you’re not in a good spot.”
Her man. Liv frowned. She didn’t think those words were right anymore. Hadn’t been for a long, long time. She’d been an idiot to think otherwise.
Yeah, she was in full pity party mode. Anyone objecting could see themselves out the door.
“Fine,” she agreed.
Sloan jumped right into caregiver mode and ordered Liv out of her jeans and into the bathroom. Liv’s grumble about needing dinner first was met with a steely look and a promise to cuff her and haul her to Bearden’s clinic if she didn’t cooperate.
Liv was soon seated on the edge of her tub with the first aid kit open at her side.
“I’ve gotten pretty good at this,” Sloan mused. She dug through the contents and pulled aside what she needed. “Between the other agents wanting to prove themselves through a good fight instead of working their damn caseload, and the madness on the ranch, I could probably be a certified nurse by now. This is going to sting a little.”
“Do they fight often?” Liv asked.
Sloan made a face. “It’s a good day when Alex is in only one brawl.”
Once Sloan finished dressing her leg with enough bandages to wrap a mummy, in Liv’s humble opinion, she said, “I’m going to update the others, then I’ll be right back to check on you.”
Liv gripped her wrist before she could leave the bathroom. “Promise me you won’t do anything to him.”
“He hurt you. Even if he didn’t mean to, this still happened.” Sloan shook her head, blue eyes hardening. “If he’d bitten you…”
He’d be no better than the one who hurt him in the first place. The same consequences would apply.
Death.
“He isn’t too far gone. You have to believe me.” Liv swallowed back the anguish she felt deep in her soul. “You want to help? Find the one who did this to him. He’s the real monster.”
Alex had tried to warn her. He’d given her every chance to turn away. She’d still pushed and prodded and wiggled her way closer. Some stupid part of her refused to understand he was different from the man she used to love.
He and his bear were one and the same, he said. Only, someone put that bear inside him and filled him with fury.
Alex scared her. Past the shock and anger for his situation and everything else, a mound of fear grew higher and higher. He’d protected her, yes. But his eyes had gone dead and animalistic. He’d clawed her up and snapped his jaws inches from her face.
He’d been right all along. She needed to stay away. Hell, maybe her entire family was right that supes were dangerous. If a vampire didn’t want to suck her dry or a fae magic her to death, there was always the threat of claws and fangs from a shifter. Liv could already hear her mother demanding she return home and find a nice, unassuming husband and live out a quiet life.
“Sloan, please. I know what happens to out of control shifters. I know what the SEA does to them if their alphas won’t step up and put them down.” She had a way out if she wanted to take it. He didn’t. She couldn’t live with herself if Alex suffered. “That monster made him this way. Don’t hurt him more.”
The woman’s expression shuttered. “That’s going to be up to Ethan.”
“Then tell me what I need to do to keep Alex alive.”
Chapter 20
Alex was hunter and hunted. The target at his front put a target on his back. Too many were after him to outrun them for long. He just wanted to hold off the inevitable until he put down the bastard that threatened Liv.
Then he could let Ethan do what an alpha dreaded and put him down, too. He deserved it. He’d harmed a human.
Not just any human, either. His mate.
He’d snapped his jaws in her face and clawed up her leg. Either could have turned to fatal wounds. Sheer luck kept her from bleeding out at his feet.
He had one task to do, then he’d walk willingly to his funeral pyre.
His bear growled. At him, at the fate he chose, Alex didn’t care. They were one on the mission, their minds melding closer than ever before. At that moment, his maker’s death was all that mattered. They could fight over the rest later.
It’d been two sunsets and a sunrise since he last walked on two feet. His maker led him up and down the mountains, in and out of the enclave, over rolling hills. Whenever Alex lost the scent, he returned to Liv’s cabin. Her scent was cold and faint, but his maker’s was fresh and strong.
Returning had been the trouble. He’d picked up a tail after the sunrise. More followed him as the day wore on and night fell. They stayed at a distance, never coming closer than a quarter mile. But they stuck to him no matter how he tried to throw them off the trail.
Still, he hunted. The ones at his back weren’t his concern. He only wanted the bastard somewhere at his front.
Impossible, when the scent faded into nothing more often than not. His maker was an apparition.
Just like the visits at the ranch, the trail ended suddenly. He thought maybe the bear shifted and rode away in some vehicle, but the tread marks he found were too regularly used to pick out any one set.
So he retraced his steps and went back to square one, but no amount of sniffing brought new clues. The bastard was too clever to be caught.
Alex started to believe his maker was all in his head. He conjured up the spirit whenever he needed an excuse to focus his upset elsewhere. The monster of his past was the greatest scapegoat for his own slip into hellish behavior.
He needed a monstrous bastard to explain away harming his mate.
But no. The aches and pains up and down his body came from somewhere. Some brawling bear scored him with claws and fangs. He couldn’t just imagine that. Could he?
Alex lifted a lip and snarled into the darkness. No. The sickly foul scent clogging his nose was too real. Too intrusive. It had branded itself on his brain the moment he first felt fangs tearing into his arms and legs.
He intended to return the favor. Questioning his sanity was just another torturous trick.
He paused at the crest of a hill. Moonlight glinted off the water below. Nothing moved, but he knew better than to trust his sight. He could taste his maker on each breath he drew. He was out there. Somewhere. Faint scent or no scent at all, he was still alive and needed to be found.
Alex silently glided down the hill toward the stream. Bubbling water was a constant, dim, almost comforting sound. Somewhere in the distance, an owl hooted and dove a black shadow over the stream.
The place wasn’t the same one he’d intended to sit with Liv beside while they ate and drank their fill, but the banks were similar enough that his heart ached to see her again. He wanted a lifetime of her laughs and only had his memories.
Giving in to the strong pull he felt for her had been a mistake. He’d been weak to let her sweet temptation lead him back to her bed. His maker saw it all and struck right where he’d hurt the most. Losing her all over again would destroy him.
Alex steeled himself. He’d lost her already. He’d make sure he brought another down with him. Then pyres and blissful death.
Movement rustled at the tree line. He bristled and whirled at the noise, ready to strike. A shadowy shape emerged, followed by two more. Each one smelled more of baked earth than forest and insanity.
Three lions ghosted along the stream, all eyes on him. He growled and turned to go, only to be met by a bear at his back.
His growl rattled louder in his t
hroat, but bright eyes simply watched him. He spun again and again, trying to keep the faint scent of his maker in his nose. He didn’t have time for anyone else. Whatever they wanted could wait until he took down his prey.
More numbers joined them, until they were three lions and three bears, all with the single focus of drawing together tighter and tighter until he was stuck. He recognized the scents. Ashford clan and Crowley pride. They’d set aside their differences to hunt him down.
Alex roared with vicious violence and tried to push his way through the blockade. Lions and bears crowded around him and snapped him back into place.
Assholes! Couldn’t they smell anything? They were letting his maker get away!
Maybe he was crazy after all.
Crazy enough to snap back and sink his claws anywhere he could reach. Desperation powered his blows. He needed to get free!
Grunts and growls met his ears, but they spiraled tighter and tighter, leaving him no space to move and barely any to breathe.
A rumble sounded in the distance, then lights slashed over the scene. Alex twisted in the tight confines of other bodies as a pickup truck bumped over the rough terrain. The lions called out, chuffing where the bears stayed silent.
Two men hopped out and walked to the edges of the shifting sea of fur. One ran his hands through his hair while the other simply cocked his head and bared his teeth. Alex let their scents rolled over him. Both were full of fur and dominance that made him snarl. Ethan’s held worry, but Trent’s was tinged with a hint of the fury and madness that drove Alex on.
Trent lifted a rifle to his shoulder.
Not yet, Alex pleaded. He wasn’t ready yet. He still had blood to draw.
“It’s time to come home,” Ethan said. “You’re going to hurt someone out here.”
Already had. The scent of Liv’s fear haunted him.
He snarled and whipped his head from side to side. Running and hunting were better on four feet. He didn’t need to see her pain again. He didn’t have to face the shame of harming his mate.
“Liv has been asking for you.”
Alex’s heart seized.
“She’s staying at the ranch. We’ve watched over her for you. Kept her safe,” Ethan continued. “I don’t know what to tell her.”
Nothing. His human side wanted to spit. He had no words to offer her. No tenderness to make things right. He’d hurt her. He’d done it before and he did it again and he’d just keep doing it if he stayed close to her. He was fucked in the head. He couldn’t keep a mate. Couldn’t cherish her the way she needed. One misstep, and he drew her blood.
He needed to pay for that sin.
His bear, though, paused.
She was their mate. She needed them.
“Shift,” his alpha ordered.
He shook off the command. He didn’t want to obey. Couldn’t. Not when his monster still walked the earth.
“Alex, last warning. Shift and make this easy on everyone.”
Fuck that.
He slammed through the bodies blocking him and pawed at the earth. Red swam in his vision. He wouldn’t be ordered around.
He charged.
“Take him,” Ethan ordered.
A sharp noise, then a sting in his shoulder.
Alex stumbled forward as the tranquilizer blasted through his system. His front legs crumpled underneath him. His spine tingled, then numbed as the world darkened down to twin pinpoints of light.
Then those, too, were gone.
When he woke again, he was in a cage.
Chapter 21
The rest of Saturday passed without a word or sign from Alex.
Word of what happened spread like wildfire within the clan. The ranch was full of activity from the moment Liv pulled to a stop in front of the main house with Sloan right behind her. Tansey settled her into a room upstairs and the waiting began.
Sunday, one of the others spotted Alex. Ethan headed up the mission to track him down, but there’d been no update by the time Tansey convinced her to trudge up to bed and try to find some sleep.
Liv felt like shit on Monday morning. Her heart pounded much too fast. She felt achy and flushed even though her temperature was normal. Her stomach revolted against the idea of joining the others downstairs for breakfast. Dark bags lined her eyes from all the sleep she’d abandoned after an hour or two of staring at the ceiling above her bed.
She missed Alex. Worry for him ran almost as strong, but the hole in her heart and the pit in her stomach throbbed constantly. She felt like she’d lost him all over again. Alone in her apartment or alone in the woods, the same sharp sorrow filled her as before.
The noises downstairs faded to nothing by the time she found the will to roll out of bed. She washed her face and dressed for the day, then steeled herself enough to walk down the stairs.
The house was unusually quiet. The few days she’d been there always had something going on. Tansey and Joss never seemed far from the kitchen. The men wandered in and out between their other tasks. Even Sloan was a frequent face when not on duty.
Truthfully, the quiet was both unnerving and welcome. Liv didn’t want more looks of pity or quiet words meant to make her feel better. She wanted Alex.
Liv paused at the great fireplace and studied the pictures lining the mantle. Some were old, with faces she didn’t recognize. Newer ones dotted the collection, most with the happy couples she knew. Despite the attempted scowls on the men’s faces, she could still see the obvious affection in their eyes.
One of Ethan snagged her attention. She picked it up for a closer look. He had his arm wrapped around a younger woman with features similar to his own and lighter hair. A relation, Liv guessed, since Tansey, Joss, and Sloan were the only mates on the ranch. They hadn’t mentioned anyone else during the movie night, either.
“My sister.”
Liv startled at Ethan’s voice. She glanced over her shoulder and found him right behind her. He reached around her and plucked the picture from her hands. “Where is she?”
“Third year of university in Bozeman.” A ghost of a smile passed over Ethan’s face as he settled the frame back into place. “I wish she’d find a man and stay there.”
Liv scoffed. “You sound just like my mother. She nearly had a stroke when I told her I wanted to go to grad school.”
“Not like that. Colette has ideas of coming back here and nursing our sick animals and turning the ranch around. She could do anything she wanted. No reason for her to be tied down to this place.”
“And you think if she finds someone, they’ll keep her away.”
“I know finding your mate is the best thing in the world. I want her to have that happiness and know someone has her back through the good and the bad.” His second smile was bigger and lasted for more than a second. “And maybe I won’t need my kid sister in my business every damn day.”
“You really care for her.”
“I care for them all.” His eyes flicked to the next picture over. The men of the Black Claw clan hung out the windows or perched on the hood of a truck covered in mud. “But sometimes caring isn’t enough.”
Her heart jumped to her throat. “Did you find him?”
Instead of answering, he turned toward the kitchen. He went right for the cabinet with the booze and pulled out a bottle of whiskey and two glasses. “This isn’t an easy life,” he said as he poured amber liquid into both.
Liv drew in a deep breath and released it slowly as she approached. Drinking came naturally to the wild clan, but so early? Shaky nerves and bad news went with a stiff drink before noon.
“We’re a little wilder out here. Prone to brawling and broken bones. My bears all have inner demons and struggle to keep steady. I’ve tried to give them all a place to get their heads on right and carve out a life for themselves.” Ethan slid her a glass and took a swig from his own, mouth set in a grim line.
“Did you find him?” Liv repeated.
A muscle jumped in his jaw. He stared hard int
o his glass and took another swallow. “A good alpha takes up the role hoping they will help their people. Sometimes they aren’t enough. Sometimes the demons win.”
Liv ignored the room swimming around her and planted her hands on the table. She didn’t like the direction of the conversation. She liked Ethan’s coddling even less. “Did you,” she started in a hard voice, “find him?”
“We need to take a drive.” Ethan slammed back the rest of his drink and stood, then nodded at hers. “Drink up. I need you steady and brave.”
Heart still lodged in her throat, Liv gulped down her drink under Ethan’s watchful eye. As soon as she was done, he strode for the door.
Liv didn’t know what to expect or where she’d be taken. She clung to the one hope that had kept her going as the days faded into nights and brought sunrises filled with new worry.
Alex had to be alive.
In bad condition, sure, but still alive. Ethan would have said something otherwise instead of preparing her with a drink and taking her elsewhere.
Instead of turning toward town, Ethan swung the other direction and turned into the next ranch.
Signs warned visitors away with rude curses. Ethan ignored them all and bumped along the single track road, not unlike the one leading to the heart of Black Claw Ranch.
But they didn’t pass any buildings. At some point, Ethan turned off the road and onto a faint path. They crested hills and drove through a herd of cattle, all while Liv’s nerves sparked together and didn’t give her a moment of peace. So much for the drink.
Ethan cursed as he pulled to a stop in front of a small hill with a dark opening at its base. One other truck sat nearby. “This is going to be hard. Let me do the talking, okay?”
