As we are discussing this the person who must be Ella taps on the door and enters. She is followed by two young men carrying covered dishes. Trevor introduces her and the young gentlemen to me as Ella, Fredrick and Edward. They are all three definitely other but I am not sure what. I don’t want to be overly forward and ask but it really is rare that I can’t tell just by shaking hands. Then I notice the gold eyes. Light Fae!! I have never met any Fae before. They are beautiful. Completely amazing and I am thrilled. Ella takes the lead and says that they live on the grounds and if there is anything that I need to please feel free to call her. They congratulate us on our marriage and quietly leave.
There is a bottle of honey wine on the table and two full glasses. I am so excited about the Fae that I have forgotten the food. Trevor reaches over and uncovers my dishes. The main dish is broiled fish with a berry salad and the second is a desert custard of some kind. Suddenly I am nervous again. None of the food is for Trevor. That leaves little question of what or rather who will be his dinner. He is reading my mind again and he smiles. He almost looks evil. In a really, really hot way.
By my second glass of Fae Honey Wine I am way braver and fuller then I was when we sat down but Trevor is still scary. I am not saying I don’t want to be here, I do. Maybe if it could just be a third date and not our wedding night. But Gran has said for years that Trevor was the one and I have always thought he was smart and funny and kind and hot. We did fast forward a bit but we have driven to work together for the last four years. Worked together, gone to office parties, been shot at, and driven over the speed limit just for laughs. I am babbling because I am scarred. And he knows my family and still likes me. That must mean he is in very much in love and very brave. I think.
It’s time to go up stairs and Trevor is the only man I have ever kissed or held hands with. He is a mind reading 500 year old vampire who is probably compelling me, maybe for my own good. He also says he is in love with me and always will be. This is over whelming.
I don’t know about vampire marriages, or regular marriages for that matter, but I do know that the couple is bonded and that typically if one partner dies they both do. The vampire benefits because he receives a life partner that will never age or die. A constant source of food. The revenant, or human servant benefits from very long life, youth and an eternity of servitude. I am sure that is a not all of it but it is all I know right now. The rest I guess I will find out. It also involves trading blood. I don’t really get that part but I am betting I will.
Trevor has waited and listened to me babble long enough. He walks around the table takes my napkin form my lap and guides me to the stairs. From the bottom the stairs look daunting. He picks me up like I weigh less then my shoes and moves up the stairs. I am staring at his face. He really is beautiful. There is a kindness about his face too. I always feel safe if he is with me. Maybe that’s why I always make sure he is.
When we reach the master suite I am no longer nervous. I have known Trevor for years. This is where I am supposed to be. I know it. I also have the feeling I am being compelled or somehow told what to do. Trevor is telling me what to do and how to feel. It’s true, I am positive, but it doesn’t upset me. Contentment and calm are all around me and I love Trevor. Or that’s what I am being told. I keep asking myself why he would do this and why it doesn’t matter to me but no words will come.
When we get to his bedroom Trevor puts me down and locks the door. We are home alone to the best of my knowledge but if it makes him more comfortable I don’t have a problem with it. He stands facing the door for a minute or two longer and then he turns around. His face has changed. It is sharper, more angular and his eyes are black pupils ringed in red. And he has fangs. Long sharp upper canines. I am no longer content and calm. I am terrified but I can’t make myself move. My powers are locked down and I am immobile. The compulsion is real, I was right and I let myself be taken over. I let him take my free will.
He starts walking towards me and he holds out his right hand. I raise my left no matter how hard I try not to. I extend my hand to the vampire in control of my head. How could he do this to me? I would have walked into fire for him. I would have risked my life for him. I have risked my life for him. Three days ago I would have said he was a friend. Ten minutes ago I would have said I was in love with him. Now I feel like I don’t even know him but I am physically incapable of turning away. I can’t make myself run. I can’t scream. I am paralyzed. I am terrified.
“I am so sorry Cate but this is how it has to be. If I don’t claim you tonight Demetri will have you by morning and that would be a fate worse than death. I swear if there was another way I would offer it to you but there is not. I brought this on you and it is my fault. I understand if you hate me but please understand that I never intended for this to happen. I didn’t believe it could. When your grandmother warned me I thought I could change it but I couldn’t and now I love you. Demetri will hurt you to hurt me unless we are bonded. It is the only way I can protect you. It is the only way I can stop him from making you pay for how I feel and what I did. Please know I love you.”
We are holding hands and I can see what he is thinking now. Demetri is a sociopath. If he has a way to control Trevor no one else would be able to hold him in check. He could do as he pleased with our city and the whole western seaboard. This was for the greater good. I will be Trevor’s servant to stop Demetri. I have heard the words revenant and servant before but I never really knew what they meant until now. I can see it in Trevor’s mind. He will be able to find me and control what I do for as long as we both live. And that will be a very, very long time. What is happening here is not consensual anymore because I lack the capacity to give consent. I cannot say no and I never will be able to again. I will be conscious of my wants but I will not be able to express them. I am sick with terror.
Trevor apologizes again and pulls me into his arms. I feel his fangs on my throat and I remember the night I offered it to him. He had turned away. Tonight no one will turn away. I feel his fangs sink in and everything else disappears. Trevor is the whole world. The venom hits my system and the feeling of euphoria is overwhelming. I cannot be close enough to him. How could I have believed I did not want this, that I did not want him?
I don’t remember how we got to the bed or how our cloths came off but I am aware we are in his bed. The sheets are cool against the heat of my skin. I am arching against him pleading but I don’t know what I am pleading for. I have to have this or I will lose myself, my mind, my everything. Trevor looks deep into my eyes and I feel how much he loves me. He then buries his face in my neck and bites again just as he pushes into me. I feel myself tear. It is a sharp and burning pain but I don’t want it to stop. I don’t want any of it to stop ever. Trevor can have every last drop of blood in my entire body if he will just stay with me. Inside me.
Then he starts to move. Slowly thrusting in and out. A tension is building inside me as the euphoria of the venom flows through. I can’t live without this. I can feel his mouth on my throat pulling long deep swallows, draining me and I don’t care. Just don’t stop don’t ever stop. Whether it is my will or his no longer matters. I am lost. I will die if this tension builds anymore and I will die if it stops. Then I feel myself explode, the sensation rushes through me, aching my back and forcing my head back further. We are the same being, my heart beats for his. I breathe for him and all the while he is thrusting into me faster and deeper. Drinking more.
The tension builds quickly and I go over the edge again taking him with me. I am pulsing around him and he is pulsing inside me. Trevor is my everything. And then I pass out.
Chapter 9: Hangover
I wake up sometime later to Trevor shaking me and trying to force his bleeding wrist against my lips. I try to point out that it would be easier to put his wrist to my lips if he wasn’t shaking me so violently but he is not listening. He seems frantic. I feel weak and dreamy. Trevor finally seems to realize that I am trying to comply and quits trying
give me whip lash. I swallow the blood that is filling my mouth, gross, and keep swallowing as I stare into his familiar warm brown eyes. There is something that I am forgetting. Something important that is just out of reach. I know I will remember it but for right now I have to keep drinking. It is imperative but I don’t know why.
Then it comes to me. Trevor has to give me his blood because he compelled me and drank all mine. I am now a revenant and Trevor is my master and it is all his fault. As soon as I am strong enough to move my arm I am going to hit him. With something hard. Trevor smiles, he is reading my mind. Asshat.
“You are back. I thought I had lost you. I was afraid I took too much.”
“I can’t move my arms so I am going to say that you did take too much. I am also going to file a grievance with Human Resources tomorrow. You can’t just turn a person into your personal slave without their permission just because you have seniority. I trusted you! Was anything that happened yesterday real at all or was that just your way of making me go quietly? Do I really love you and do you love me or is this all just part of some messed up vampire game that I was not aware of? I swear Trevor, I don’t want to be your toy for the next five hundred years, this is just so sick.”
Trevor looks so stricken that I almost feel bad, emphasis on almost.
“You are not a toy and yes, I do love you. The things I told you last night were real but you have to believe that first and foremost I love you in a way I never thought I even could. I have to protect you because if you were hurt it would kill me and it would be my fault. I will make you happy. I swear, we will be happy.”
I want to tell him how angry I am. How much he has abused my trust. But I can’t. The truth it I do trust him, I am just afraid. I don’t like being dependent on anyone because being dependent means being let down. Maybe this will be different, maybe it will be okay but I am scared.
“I am too tired to talk about this now. We have all day tomorrow. And the next and the next….” Giving blood takes a lot out of a girl. Literally. I laugh at my own joke and refuse to tell it to Trevor. I will have my twisted revenge, sort of.
Chapter 10: Sober
When I woke up this morning Trevor was still in bed with me. I don’t think he slept at all. He looks like he is waiting on a sentence in a death penalty trial. I have to smile. Trevor is my best friend and I do love him. Plus I know that if he turns me into a mindless ninny my Gran will come and cut out his heart. Trevor knows this too because he just saw it in my mind and he knows my Gran. He doesn’t seem too worried about the heart thing so I won’t worry about the ninny thing.
Trevor kisses me on the forehead and gets up to hand me my favorite sleep shirt. I bought it at a street fair a few years ago and it is ratty as hell but I love it anyway. It is a graphic print that says:
“I always wear black so that you will always know I am ready for your funeral.”
I give Trevor a kiss on the forehead as he hands me the shirt. It makes me wonder how got it and what else he brought over so I ask.
“All of it. I had it picked up yesterday while we were at the courthouse.” Trevor says this as if it makes all the sense in the world.
“But you didn’t even ask me. I didn’t give you a key. What if I had said no!”
“Then you would have had no cloths or make up because we were getting married and we are living here.”
The old fashioned ones are so bossy. I swear to God. I am not going to start my day this way so I get up and go into the bathroom, close the door and lock it. My tooth brush is in the holder, my shampoo is in the shower and my make up bag is on the counter. He wasn’t kidding.
I take a quick shower and walk out in a towel. Trevor is not in the room so I go to the only other door assuming it is the closet. It is. And it is full of clothes. My cloths and other clothes like them only girly. Dress and shoes and hand bags. All with the tags and all in my size. He must have done this over a period of weeks or had it done. There are at least four times as many cloths as I had at home and maybe five. On a whim I go to the jewelry box on the dresser and open it. It has a box in it with a note that reads, “When you are ready I would be honored if you would wear it.” The box holds an amazing necklace with a Safire as the center stone. It is so beautiful I almost forgive Trevor. I slip it on and fasten it. It matches my wedding ring. I will never take it off. Trevor is suddenly behind me with his arms around me. I drop the towel.
We are going to be late to work but at least we will be sober.
Trevor and I drag into work at about 2:40 and I swear everyone is looking at us without while trying to not look at us. Or maybe I am just paranoid and they have all developed prominent nervous ticks overnight. The only one not avoiding me is crazy Jan. She follows me into my office and before door is even half closed she asks in a loud voice, “So, how was he?”
She is a werewolf who loves cats. She is always going to be weird.
I am not ready for this conversation. I will never be ready for this conversation. I want to die. Thank God that Jan is easily distracted. I ask her about her new kitten and Trevor is forgotten. Easy peasy, as Jan would say.
Jan is full of news today. Apparently my dad stopped in and so did another guy who left me a card. She put it in my In-Box, it smells like lavender and the paper is very expensive. It also has a red seal on it with the letter “D” on it and the letter “D” is also in the top corner. That makes two letter “D’s” on just the front. Her kitten is fine and my dad says my phone isn’t working.
Jan says all of this in one breath. She also says my dad is widowed and that she knows this because he asked him. They are going out tomorrow night. Awesome.
At least she forgot about Trevor. As Jan continues talking I plug in my cell phone and listen to my messages. One is from early today from my dad and one is from the professor that was such a jerk at the school. He says he got my name and number from the security guard at the university and he wants to talk to me as soon as possible. I grab the “D” note from my In-Box and write “ouche Bag” on it. I but it back in the box. I don’t have an Out-Box because I rarely do any paperwork, I probably should but I don’t. Thank goodness that Jan knows this and just takes the few things she figure I am probably done with.
If Demetri thinks he can scare me with tacky stationary he is dead wrong. I don’t even open it. The implied threat is met with an implied “Fuck Off”. I will deal with him later.
In the cab on the way over I call the professor from the number on my caller ID. It rings right through and he picks up on the first ring. He thanks me for getting back to him on a Saturday and I tell him it is my pleasure. Plus I forgot it was Saturday anyway. He tells me he will meet me at the science building, that the left door is unlocked and the security gaurd is expecting me. He will be in his office. We say our goodbyes and hang up. On Thursday he wouldn’t talk to me but today he comes in on a weekend and waits for me to call. Weird.
When I get to the Science Building I hurry in and rush up the stairs. I am feeling anxious about something and I can’t say what. There are no lights on and only one door is open. It is the professor that was so rude last time. He is waiting at his desk and he looks more anxious them me if that is even possible. He gestures to the chair and I sit.
He starts talking very rapidly and very nervously right away. Like he wants to get something off his chest but he is afraid to say it so he dives right in.
“I am sorry that I was rude to you last time you came. If I had known you wanted to talk about Christine Vail I would have asked you in and closed the door. I do have something or I may have something. I tried to tell the police at the time but no one would listen. Professor McNeil was having a relationship with Ms. Vail. He did it every semester. He would pick out a quiet shy student and start paying special attention to her. At the time the administration would turn their heads to things like this. McNeil was a good-looking man in a position of authority. He called them his “Projects” and would update the staff on his “Progress”
throughout the semester. At the end of term the girl would go home and he would drop her. I am sure his wife knew but she spoke very little English and had no friends or family nearby. McNeil is a bastard.”
He stops to refill his coffee and offers me a cup too. I decline.
“The year Ms. Vail was in his class he did his usual due diligence and made sure her family lived far enough away that she would be gone for the Christmas break. It was his way of making an easy out. He didn’t find out that they were estranged until it was almost the end of semester. She came to his office and they argued. She was crying and almost hysterical. He practically threw her out of the building. All I heard him say was she is pregnant. His wife was pregnant at the time and so we all thought that’s what he meant. I thought that’s what he meant.”
The professor paused and looked at me like he wanted me to say something. “What did he mean?”
“I think he meant Christine was pregnant, too.”
“Why would you think that?”
“At the end of term when I was working on grades I thought I was alone in the offices when I heard someone arguing. It was coming from the upper rooms but the insulation in here is crap and if something is loud on one floor you can hear it on the other floors. I think it was Christine and McNeil. She was saying she would tell everyone, that he would be ruined and that he owed her. She was going to have the baby. She said he had lied and she would tell his wife. He said if he ever saw her at his house he would kill her and then a door slammed. That was all I heard. The next semester Christine did not return and her apartment was eventually checked by the police but only because her rent wasn’t paid. No one ever reported her missing. By the time they discovered she was gone McNeil’s wife had died. I tried to say something but by then it was too late. No one wanted to hear it. McNeil was off the hook because no one had cared enough to notice she was gone but I know he did something. I just know.”
The Bloody Mary Diet: The Detective Adele Series Book 1 Page 7
