by Beth Rinyu
***
Jason
Ashley and I had spent the afternoon together hanging out at my place, watching movies. I had to work the midnight shift and was hoping to catch a few hours of sleep before I went in.
“So, how’s Brett doing?” She asked just as the movie ended.
“He’s good. He was bummed out last night. He was hoping to see you.”
She nodded. “Oh well, another time, I guess.”
“Can I just ask you something, and I need you to be honest?”
“What?” She hesitantly responded.
“Why do you not like Carrie?”
“What?! I never said I didn’t like her.” I could see right through her façade.
“Ash, come on! I’m not stupid. The first time we broke up, Carrie had a lot to do with it and now you intentionally avoid places you know she’s gonna be.”
“I do not, Jason! I had a migraine last night!”
“Okay, whatever.” I could tell this conversation was useless and wasn’t going to get me anything but a headache.
She looked away, then faced me once again. “It’s just – it’s just you two have this relationship that I just don’t get.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, let’s face it, most guys and girls can’t be just friends….it always leads to more.”
“Is that really what you think? That I would sleep with Carrie behind your back. If that’s the case then you and I should just break up now because I don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t trust me.” This was a vicious cycle and it was now coming full circle once again. When Ashley and I got back together, she said she could deal with my friendship with Carrie and things would be different. Apparently, she couldn’t deal with it and things weren’t better….they were worse.
“I trust you, Jason. It’s Carrie. I see the way she looks at you.”
“What? You’re insane, you know that? Carrie is in a serious relationship with one of my best friends, or have you forgotten? He is going to ask her to marry him.”
Her eyes widened and I saw a little relief wash over her face. “Oh, I didn’t know that.”
“Well, of course you wouldn’t know that because you don’t give a shit about what’s going on with me and my friends, all you care about is that fuckin’ job of yours.”
“That’s not true!” she snapped.
“You know what? I’m not even going to go there again with you. Carrie is my friend. She is going to be in my life forever and if you can’t accept that, then maybe you and I should just call it quits….again.”
“I’m sorry. I’m just thinking about this big presentation I have to do at work tomorrow, and I’m a little on edge. I’m perfectly fine with Carrie.”
My eyes darted to my ringing cell phone on the coffee table as did Ashley’s. Carrie’s name was flashing across the caller ID. Ashley glared at me, waiting to see what I would do.
“Aren’t you gonna answer that?” she asked snidely.
Even though it was killing me not to, I shook my head. “I’ll call her back later.”
She moved closer to me and placed her lips on mine. “I’m sorry, Jason. I don’t want to fight with you over this. I just gotta get through this week at work, and I’ll be a little more bearable to deal with.”
It was always something with her. The stress of her job. She was fighting with her mom. There was always something she needed to get through before she could deal with things. She hugged me tightly, and I finally gave in and hugged her back, the whole time hoping Carrie didn’t have some type of emergency she needed me for. My mind began to wander as Ashley’s lips moved down my neck. I knew Carrie was spending the day in the City with Brett. What if he decided to ask her to marry him today instead of waiting until his birthday? And what if she said yes. Shit. What if she said yes? Was it wrong of me to be thinking about Carrie, as my girlfriend was unbuttoning my jeans? I knew the answer to that question better than anyone. It was dead wrong. I was feeling like a hypocrite for getting pissed at Ashley for her insecurities over Carrie and me because at the exact moment that Ashley was lifting her shirt over her head and climbing on top of me, Carrie’s face was all I could see.
Chapter 10
Carrie
I hated Monday mornings. I hated them even more after getting into a huge fight with my boyfriend over the weekend and not hearing from him since. I felt a little better after I talked to Jason about it, but I was still upset. Brett loved me. He had proven that time and time again, and I loved him. I just wished he could see that my decision not to move right now had nothing to do with how I felt about him or us. At least I hoped it didn’t.
I sat on the couch and stared into space as I took my first sip of coffee. Butterflies erupted in my stomach when I heard a knock on my door, foolishly wondering if it was Brett. The butterflies flapped around even more when I opened the door to find Jason on the other side. Why? Why was I getting butterflies at the sight of Jason?
“Hey, what brings you here so early in the morning?” I stood on my tiptoes and placed a kiss on his cheek.
“I’m just getting off work and wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“I’m fine.” I smiled and walked into the kitchen, making him a cup of coffee just the way he liked it and then leading him over to the couch.
“Carrie, I could talk to him if you want?”
I held up my hand. “Nah, I’m just going to give him a little time to get over it and then I’ll give him a call. Do you think I’m wrong for not moving out there?”
His eyes widened and I could sense his discomfort with the question. “Ah, Carrie. I – I don’t know. That’s a question only you can answer. You’re the only one who knows how you feel deep inside.”
He was right. Even though I was totally confused with how I was feeling at the moment. “I don’t know, it’s like I miss him a lot and seeing him this weekend was so awesome but….god, Jason, I’m so confused.”
“Well, don’t rush your decision. It’s a huge choice and he’s gotta understand that. The last thing you want to do is move out there for all the wrong reasons only to be back in a few months.”
He was right again. I loved that I could always depend on him to put everything in perspective for me. I put my coffee mug down on the table and gave him a hug. “Thank you so much! You have no clue how much this just helped me.”
“Anytime, Carrie, you know that.”
I rested my head on his chest a little longer than I should have but everything about it just felt so right and so familiar. “You look exhausted!” I said once I finally raised my head to look at him.
“Yeah, it was a long night. Plus I only got a few hours of sleep yesterday.”
“Well, what are you doing here? Get your ass home and go to bed.”
“Yeah. I am or at least I’m going to try. They’re doing construction across the street from me which means jackhammers going all day long. It sucks for us who gotta sleep during the day.”
“Why don’t you just crash here? It’s nice and quiet.”
“Nah, it’ll be fine.”
“Really, Jas. I’m leaving now, so the place is yours for the next nine hours. You need to get some uninterrupted sleep. Couch or bed? Take your pick.”
He shook his head and rubbed the back of his neck, clearly knowing he had no other choice in the matter. “Couch is fine.”
“Okay, then start getting yourself comfortable.” I went into my room and got him the spare pillows from my bed and the extra blanket in my closet.
“Here’s some pillows and here’s a blanket…now lay down and get some rest!”
“Jeez, you are bossy.” He chuckled, taking off his shoes and lying down on the couch. I waited until he was all settled before covering him up with the blanket.
“The thermostat for the air conditioner is on the wall, feel free to adjust it to your liking. The weatherman said it’s supposed to get hot today.”
“Thanks mom – I mean Carrie.” He
joked.
“Anytime, smart ass. I’ll talk to you later,” I said, grabbing my purse and bag and heading out the door.
I shifted my sunglasses from the top of my head and onto my eyes once I stepped out into the bright sunlight. I fumbled through my purse as I got in the car to read the text message that had just beeped on my phone.
Brett: I’m sorry about yesterday. I love you.
I was smiling on the inside and out as I typed out my reply:
Me: Me too and I love you too. XOXO.
My eyes began to burn with tears, and I wasn’t quite sure why. Was it because I was truly happy over the text I had just received from Brett, or was it my guilt over how I was just feeling moments ago about the man sleeping on my couch?
***
Jason
My eyes slowly opened, and I finally felt like I had gotten a good amount of sleep for the first time in a long while. The scent of Carrie and her perfume was all over the blanket that covered my body, and I found myself pulling it closer to me just to inhale more of it. I looked down at my watch and immediately sat up after seeing it was already after four. I never slept this late during the day. The burning in my stomach was a reminder I hadn’t eaten anything in almost twenty-four hours. I needed to get home, eat, shower, and head back into work in a few hours to start all over again. I folded the blanket and placed it on the back of the couch before putting on my shoes. It felt good to have finally gotten some much-needed sleep – thanks to Carrie. I grabbed my keys and was just about to head out when the photographs on her wall caught my eye. Carrie and Gia. Carrie and her mom. Carrie and her dad. Carrie and Brett, but the ones that put the biggest smile on my face were of Carrie and me. I stared closely at the photo of the two of us taken in Barbados at our parent’s wedding, remembering it like it was yesterday. It was one of the best times of my life. Before I had met Ashley and before Carrie started seeing Brett. Carrie had faced her fears and had gone snorkeling with me after I’d begged her and had been pleasantly surprised with the fun time she’d had. My eyes moved to the next picture of us taken at Carrie’s college graduation, she was so happy, graduating in the top ten of her class and I was equally as proud of her. So many memories the two of us shared together. Memories no one could ever take away. I stared at the image behind the glass one last time letting out a deep sigh and heading out. I jumped when I opened the door to exit to find Brett on the other side.
“Damn bro, you just scared the shit out of me!
“Jason! What are you doing here?” Brett seemed equally surprised to see me as I did to see him.
“Oh, Carrie let me crash here this morning after I got done working because there’s construction going on across the street from my house.”
He looked at me questioningly, and I wanted to make it clear that whatever he was suspecting was wrong. “I worked seven p.m. to seven a.m. I swung by here this morning to see how Carrie was doing because….well, she was upset over what happened between you guys yesterday.”
“Oh.” His posture relaxed a bit as did his demeanor.
“I thought you were heading back today.”
“I was. I mean, I am. I got my flight changed to a later one and was able to get out of my meetings early so I could surprise Carrie. I feel like shit for starting that fight with her yesterday.”
How I had wished there was something about Brett that made me feel like he wasn’t good enough for Carrie, but there wasn’t. He truly loved her, and I should be grateful for that.
“Oh, well, I think she doesn’t get done with work for another hour. Why don’t you go surprise her there?”
“Good thinking, Jas!” I gave him Carrie’s address at work, knowing it would make her day by seeing him. After we said our goodbyes, I sat in my car for a little while as he drove away, imagining the look on Carrie’s face when she saw him, wishing it was me that could be bringing her that happiness instead.
Chapter 11
Carrie
I was fumbling around in my purse for my keys and not paying attention as I walked out of work. “Hey, who taught you how to parallel park?”
“Brett!” I shrieked at the sight of him standing up against my car, looking good enough to eat in his dress pants, dress shirt and loosened tie.
His arms wrapped around me washed away all of the apprehension of the day. “I’m so sorry baby; I didn’t want to leave knowing we were fighting.”
I buried my face into his chest and breathed in his cologne. The tears rolled down my face. I was so happy and so blessed to have such a great guy in my life, and now I was feeling even worse about my indecisiveness over moving out to California. “Hey, why are you crying?” He asked, taking my face in his hands and wiping away the teardrops with his fingers.
“Because, I’m just so happy to see you. I wasn’t expecting this.”
“Well, I rearranged my flight and have to be at the airport in….” he looked at his watch. “Three hours.”
“Well, then we’re just going to have to be quick aren’t we?”
“I can do quick.” He laughed.
We arrived back at my place and were nearly tearing each other’s clothes off in the doorway. We made the most of the little time we had, and I was feeling much more at ease with our relationship than I had when I woke up in the morning.
“I gotta get,” he said, looking down at his watch.
I lay on top of him and placed gentle kisses on his chest. “Stay. Quit your job and live here. You can be a house-boyfriend.”
“A what?!” He smiled.
“You know, instead of a housewife, a house-boyfriend.”
“You are strange, you know that, Carrie?”
“Hmm…maybe a little. But that’s why you love me.”
“That and a million other reasons.” His warm soft hands ran down my bare back. “I promise this is the only thing I’m going to bring up about California and it has nothing to do with you moving there.”
“Okay. I’m listening.”
“Well, since my birthday is in two weeks I thought of the best present you can give me.”
“Oh yeah and what’s that?” I asked, pressing my chin into his chest.
“Come out and visit me for the weekend.”
“Oh, babe I would love to, but I have a seminar I have to go to in Houston. It starts on Wednesday and doesn’t finish until Friday night. Maybe we can plan it for the following weekend?”
“No, I think the weekend of my birthday would work out fine.” I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, wondering how we were going to make that work. “Since my parents live just outside of Houston, I can accomplish two things at once. Get my mom off my back for not visiting and spend my birthday with my girl.”
“But Houston isn’t California.”
“Yeah, but for now, I’ll take what I can get. I know I’ll get you there someday.” I let out an uncomfortable laugh, not wanting to get on this topic with him again. “So, does Jason sleep over often?” he blurted out of nowhere.
I lifted my head from his chest. “What?”
“How do you think I knew where you worked? I came here first and Jason was just leaving.” I could sense a little displeasure in his tone.
“Oh, yeah well. He just –”
“Yeah, I know. He told me.” He still seemed unconvinced.
“Well, you’re not pissed at that, are you? I mean, Jason is like family to me. There’s no reason to –”
He kissed me on the lips to stop me from talking and sat up. I watched as he buttoned up his shirt over his tightly defined abs and broad chest, and I began to question my own sanity as to why I wasn’t jumping on that plane with him.
Why?
With each passing day the answer was becoming so much clearer and as much as I tried to convince myself that wasn’t the reason…. deep down inside I knew it was.
***
Jason
I switched on my Bluetooth when I saw it was Carrie calling. “What’s up?” I answered.
“You
are such a little romantic,” she giggled.
“What do you mean?” I knew exactly what she meant, and I was hoping she would spare me the details.
“Umm, telling Brett where I worked so he could surprise me.”
“Oh that.”
“Yes that! It meant a lot to me. Thank you.”
“Anything for you, Carrie. So is everything okay now?” I asked, stopping my car as I pulled into the parking lot of the police station.
“Yes its perfect! He’s coming out to Houston in a few weeks.”
“Houston?”
“Yeah, I have a seminar out there. So he’s going to fly out there to meet me for his birthday.”
His birthday. Shit. That’s when he was planning on asking her. Part of me wondered if I should tell her and give her ample warning or let him blindside her with it. I knew if she was planning on saying yes it would mean so much more to her if she was surprised by it, and I didn’t want to ruin that for her.
“Well, that’s cool.” I tried my best to sound upbeat.
“Yeah well, his parents live close by there, which means I’ll be obligated to visit with them. That’s the one part I’m not looking so forward to.”
I couldn’t say I blamed her on that one. I had met Brett’s mother and father a few times when they had come up to college for Parents Weekend. His dad was a big time businessman and into local politics. They had money….lots of it, and they looked down on anyone that didn’t match them financially. It amazed me that Brett was even their kid. He was so down to earth and generous. They treated Brett as if he were a god, being the only boy and youngest of two older sisters. He was the one that would carry on the Madsen name or so they thought, but Brett wasn’t into conforming to their rules. In fact, he did everything to defy what they believed in, including Carrie. He had opened up to me one night after a lot of drinking about how he and his parents got into a big blow-out over him dating Carrie. They wanted him to be with someone who had a social standing, someone who came from money like him. That’s when I knew his intentions with Carrie were all good. He said that he’d stood his ground with his parents and told them if they didn’t like it, then they no longer had a son because he was not breaking up with Carrie. He made me promise to never say anything to her. I didn’t and I never would. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings over his asshole parent’s viewpoints. I just felt bad she was going to have to be subjected to them in a few weeks, and I was hoping they didn’t say or do anything to bring her down. But something told me Carrie could hold her own with them. If there was one thing about the Maynard girls, including Melanie, they didn’t take shit from anyone and I admired that.
